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[Almighty]

My money is on Lincoln. As the stories already posted in this thread show that motherfucker was something else in the prime of his life.

 

[Beartruck]

On that note-


I got this from Penny Arcade. Still the best thing I've ever read.

Taft and Roosevelt would never fight. They were basically frenemies (Taft was the last person to leave Teddy's grave at his funeral, sobbing his eyes out the whole time). It would end up with them back to back fighting everyone else.

 

[yanipheonu]

I would say if we allow Special Canadian Guest Justin Trudeau in the match, he'd do surprisingly well.

 

[Tedesco!]

Obama, Clinton, JFK, James K. Polk, and FDR would form a deadly alliance. Then K. Polk would swiftly dispatch the rest. Having done all this he sought no second term.

I see what you did there...

 

[Acorn]

On that note-


I got this from Penny Arcade. Still the best thing I've ever read.

That's damn good booking.

 

[Lois_Lane]

Taft and Roosevelt would never fight. They were basically frenemies (Taft was the last person to leave Teddy's grave at his funeral, sobbing his eyes out the whole time). It would end up with them back to back fighting everyone else.

TR doesn't have to be the one to kill him.

 

[CrocoDuck]

I choose Lincoln. Wasn't he a boxer or a wrestler at some point?

 

[RangersFan]

Ford played Center for Michigan

 

[BreezyLimbo]

Again that is a made up myth. Dude was not too healthy by the time he got elected.. He had bad asthma and only one working eye.

Teddy the badass President was a made up myth. It's not real guys. Almost all of that was just photo-ops.

Does anyone read history anymore?

This thread is depressing.

He got shot and kept reading a speech

he's badass

 

[Thewonandonly]

Ford played Center for Michigan

Awwww shit he is in the top five then.

 

[Lord Azrael]

Obama would win because most of the presidents are dead, and the rest are old.

Spoiler

 

[collige]

If it's only unarmed, I give it to abe. Honorable mentions to Teddy and Jackson though.

 

[ForsakenLotus]

Theodore Roosevelt was shot and he gave what, an hour and a half long speech afterwards before seeing a doctor? Yeah, I'm gonna go with that guy.

 

[Rival]

Don't sleep on president ford.

 

[Thewonandonly]

Theodore Roosevelt was shot and he gave what, an hour and a half long speech afterwards before seeing a doctor? Yeah, I'm gonna go with that guy.

There ain't no bullets in the thunder dome baby

 

[BreezyLimbo]

hey went at it, and Lincoln just fooled with Armstrong until he had tired him completely out. Then he swung his long leg over Armstrong’s neck and made Armstrong run around holding him up in that position. Jack finally begged off, admitting he was beaten and offered Lincoln the $10, which Lincoln refused to take.

Wait so Lincoln locked his leg around a guys neck, and then spun in circles while the guy tried to get out of it?

loool

 

[M0nochromatic]

Yup, Autopsy doctors commented how muscular his body was.

Also this from "Team of Rivals"









http://www.abrahamlincolnsclassroom.org/abraham-lincoln-in-depth/abraham-lincoln-the-athlete/

On that note-


I got this from Penny Arcade. Still the best thing I've ever read.

I'm loving all of this.

 

[Kwixotik]

George Washington's English != Barack Obama's English.

I feel like English hasn't changed THAT much since then. It's not like any of them speaks Middle or Old English. Trump or W might have a communication problem for other reasons tho.

 

[MrS]

Would put money on Grant to slay those nobodies

 

[ForsakenLotus]

There ain't no bullets in the thunder dome baby

Which means you'd have to take out that tough son of a gun by hand.

As a famous person once said, "Not bloody likely."

 

[George Washington]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7iVsdRbhnc

 

[Velcro Fly]

Abe Lincoln slayed some vampires back in the day. Got to like that combat experience when taking on the other 44.

Also this makes me want to create the presidents on mount rushmore as wrestlers in 2K17 and have them form their own stable. maybe even get like martha washington or mary todd lincoln as female members to round it out

 

[Apt101]

Theodore Roosevelt easily. This isn't even a question. Rough Riders.

 

[Acorn]

Theodore Roosevelt easily. This isn't even a question. Rough Riders.

Stop drop shut em down open up shop ohhhh nooooo that's how ruff ryders roll.

 

[MisterHero]

Abe Lincoln slayed some vampires back in the day. Got to like that combat experience when taking on the other 44.

Also this makes me want to create the presidents on mount rushmore as wrestlers in 2K17 and have them form their own stable. maybe even get like martha washington or mary todd lincoln as female members to round it out

Lincoln tragically became a vampire after fighting them all his life

that's why he's buried in cement

 

[B-Dubs]

It'd be Teddy or Lincoln.

 

[Apt101]

Stop drop shut em down open up shop ohhhh nooooo that's how ruff ryders roll.

Think you holding weight?

You haven't met the apes.

 

[Kas]

On that note-


I got this from Penny Arcade. Still the best thing I've ever read.

This is the best thing I've ever read.

 

[ForsakenLotus]

Lincoln was a great wrestler, but Theodore had a black belt in Judo, so hand to hand they're on relatively even footing. Ultimately though, Theodore survived a bullet and Lincoln didn't. I say Teddy.

I just saw this. Too soon man.

 

[Trouble]

Benjamin Franklin

Truly the greatest president.

 

[UrokeJoe]

Teddy.

 

[drspeedy]

Really, the hardest person to beat on this (or any) historical thunderdome list would have had the most combat training under the least modern methods.


It's Washington, Andrew Jackson or U.S. Grant. The rest may get a +1 for other attributes, but field training in pure survival situations wins, amigos.


Every modern day Ranger and SEAL respect the reason they have to train so hard... Because those skills they learned were that much more important for every generation before them. Technology and money (or privilege) have made us weaker in that respect.

 

[Hellwarden]

What about Nixon?

Nixon might be the ultimate heel.

 

[Acorn]

What about Nixon?

Nixon might be the ultimate heel.

Nixon strikes me as the typical sort of pussy that writes checks his ass can't cash. Unless he did a sneak attack on the others when they were fighting maybe.

 

[ccbfan]

Not sure how it's not Andrew Jackson.

Of the strong fighters group, he's the only one ruthless and conniving enough to take advantage of others.

His only weakness is that he's too aggressive and puts a huge target on himself at the start, forcing people to team up on him.

 

[Lois_Lane]

Not sure how it's not Andrew Jackson.

Of the strong fighters group, he's the only one ruthless and conniving enough to take advantage of others.

His only weakness is that he's too aggressive and puts a huge target on himself at the start, forcing people to team up on him.

Thank you!

 

[L4DANathan]

I think I'd actually bet on Bush Jr. He's the only one who would have someone else fully dedicated to their survival. People here are talking about alliances, I think the battle would be far too short for that to occur. So the only active alliance would be familial ties.

 

[lupinko]

I would say if we allow Special Canadian Guest Justin Trudeau in the match, he'd do surprisingly well.

Pierre Trudeau was a 2nd dan black belt in judo (and his teacher was an 8th dan black belt).

 

[Spoony Bob]

Would be a great reason to bring these guys back.

 

[Moppeh]

Andrew Jackson wins.

Jimmy Carter would die first.

 

[Clefargle]

My money is on Lincoln. As the stories already posted in this thread show that motherfucker was something else in the prime of his life.

This

 

[Count of Monte Sawed-Off]

Andy or Teddy are the only real choices. Maybe Washington also.

 

[Aaronrules380]

Not sure how it's not Andrew Jackson.

Of the strong fighters group, he's the only one ruthless and conniving enough to take advantage of others.

His only weakness is that he's too aggressive and puts a huge target on himself at the start, forcing people to team up on him.

I mean this is a fair point, but he would almost certainly get teamed up on at some point as well as you mentioned, which complicates matters a lot

 

[OnPoint]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7iVsdRbhnc

Thank you.