Fuck, I miss Chow Yun Fat. He was one of my idols growing up.
Asian men and interracial dating
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Fuck, I miss Chow Yun Fat. He was one of my idols growing up.
Giant Robot
Member
Its pretty current brother.
Why did bringing down the house need to be whitewashed? Why does the idea of a dynamic Asian American male lead strike such fear into the power structure?
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
Media portrayal doesn't really have a big impact over here I've found. Might be part of the environment here, but it's pretty common seeing Asian-American dudes here dating whites and latinas for example.
CharlieDigital
Banned
The difference is other groups have transcended this with current media stimulation and saturation. The Asian given to me, in this very thread, to combat this was a couple of stoners from a comedy film.
Asian Americans have not grown one Iota in the American media since the late 70s.
gaming_noob
Member
I'm confused...you guys are thinking too much...
The power structure which leads to the fetishization of a group.
Like, Do you remember the "Joy Luck Club"? This was quite literally 2 hours of Asian male bashing to the core. There was not a single redeeming quality for the group in that film. This lays the foundation for the fetish. A guy can feel at ease with a fetish because he can look back and say "At least I'm not the alternative"
Moral of the thread, really. However it's still fair to express frustration on how we are perceived in mediums. That's why I have the utmost respect for actors like John Cho who refuses to take roles that enforces negative stereotypes and die a little inside when we have this guy playing such a demeaning role (and to be fair, that shit show blatantly offends other backgrounds for the sake of "comedy").
Fuck I should just make an Asian celebrity appreciation thread.
CharlieDigital
Banned
You're wrong about your perception of comedy. In fact, I see it as transcending the stereotype of Asians as kung-fu fighting martial artists only; in successfully being cast in comedic roles, Asians have finally transcended their media stereotypes. Shit man, you would not even believe how many kids asked me if I knew kung-fu growing up.
I see it as a big step for Asians in cinema that white audiences are able to laugh with an Asian protagonist (in distinctly non-Asian themed films) now instead of at caricatures of Asians. The audience is able to see beyond the Asianess and simply laugh at weed jokes. That's a god damn breakthrough if there ever was one.
John Cho also played Sulu in Star Trek, dude.
I.....damn it I cant argue with that.
I respect your glass half full approach brother.
KodeAndGame
Member
I agree with you for the most part that ones "toolkit" transcends above all else. However, you can't ignore the effects that western media's portrayal of us does affect other people's inherent and instinctual perception. It definitely puts us at a disadvantage over other minority groups.
WascallyWabbit
Member
he deserved a BJ at least
Funny enough I told my brother when we saw it that there was no way they were gonna let an Asian brother get Aaliyah. Funny enough....,.
CharlieDigital
Banned
Asians also tend to achieve higher levels of education and, as a group, have the highest median household and individual income levels not to mention a disproportionally large representation in households with six-figure incomes.
Disadvantage? I laugh at your perceived disadvantages.
It's more and more common to see Asian male/other-race female pairings these days, but it's still quite rare. Many of the couples I've seen tend to be the new generation (ie. early thirties or younger) of families, and even then it's few and far in between.
Anecdotally, I've seen less and less asian female white male pairings these days.
Anecdotally, I've seen less and less asian female white male pairings these days.
IAmtheFMan
Member
Gotcha, so different populations. I think this brings up another point though; I've noticed that the Korean communities in the US, especially the ones that tend to pop-up in small-medium sized communities become extremely insular and are by-in-large very conservative since a large number of these were really established in the late 60's and early 70's. In fact, I can tell you that the Korean community in Ohio that I grew up with is far more conservative than my cousins from Korea.
Chairmanchuck
Member
It depends on the context, I think. I mean Americans stereotype Germans a lot with some stereotypes. "Always drinking beer, be totally emberassing as a bavarian, nazi-jokes" and things like that.
Doesnt matter to me.
The same btw. happens with whites in some HK-/Mainland-movies. Just look at how often a white male is the bad guy. And yeah. I watch a lot of these and you cant deny that the same you might be describing happens really often in chinese media too. I mean there was even this news about the british guy who wanted to rape this one woman and people were mad about this, while rapes between Chinese happen every day.
You even have the "japanese devil"-stereotypes in Chinese media, but more often in mainland dramas you see the foreigners who kinda "spit" on their culture just to make more money.
Or look at the reactions of the Pearl Princess Remake. People were mad there was a foreigner trying to date her.
But I dont get offended by that. If people wanna hate me for such shit, they can. I dont give a fuck. The same as asians shouldnt give a fuck when they see this. But as I said. I dont live in America, and here in Germany its totally different. You have some jokes about every race here, even our own. But I dont think asians feel uncomfortable here.
Again, we're talking about how mediums perceive us. This is not coming from a place of bitterness but more of an observation and speculation on how it can be changed. Like you I discourage the defeatist attitude that men, in general, can have.
I find racist/stereotype jokes hilarious but that's what it needs to be, hilarious. And for the most part I'm pretty accepting of how it is now in mediums. It just couldn't hurt to have us painted in a better light.
I read that there was supposed to be a kiss scene, but they took it out because some people on the set were "offended".
Chairmanchuck
Member
I have to agree. This portrayal of this asian guy in 2 Broke Girls is bad.
But you also have this guy from Walking Dead, Han from Fast and the Furious, this asian doctor from Greys Anatomy. I cant really think of any other american series or movies I watched where the asians were depicted as totally dumbasses.
WascallyWabbit
Member
I guess that's progress. Also, Han from Fast 5 got with Gisele, so that's something too!
Hah, fair point. However I'm sure that just plays into the model minority aspect of perception. That's all fine and well (I'll take any advantage we can get), but it's still one one side of the coin. On the other, we're still seen as effeminate, weak, socially inept, lacking confidence/communication skills, etc.
Funny enough, the same actor played a medical student in the last season of Scrubs who gets the hottest aussie chick in the show.
A paycheck is a paycheck I guess.
The lack of true media portryals plays a big part in that.
I mean, it may sound like salt, but I was truly hurt when they whitewashed "bringing down the house" because I truly believed that was the time for America to see true portrayals of Asian American men.
A portrayal not to make you sit in awe of martial arts or make you laugh, but to see an actual human. You dont see that with Asian Americans in American media, and especially with Asian American men.
Cow Mengde
Banned
Yes, this has everything to do with the discussion here if you've been following news on this movie. I can't wait to see it because it's Michael Bay. It's going to be hilariously awful.
Chairmanchuck
Member
Sure, but its the same in "your" homecountries. And I would say its even worse there. At least in China you have thousands of dramas and movies depicting foreigners or at least white guys as bad guys.
I know an actor (wont tell his name), that is always playing the role of the goofy and dumb japanese in chinese movies.
If you watch some dramas and a foreigner is involved, a lot of times, he is just after money or is behaving like a "monster". Funny thing is, they often behave like the chinese you saw on street. I once saw a drama that showed a foreigner spitting on the street and the dialogue was like "你看！ 没素质的老外".
Like I said, I dont really care, but its the same in the asian world, where foreigners are depicted as the bad guys, full of stereotypes and at least according to my experiences, its even worse in the asian countries I have been to, than I saw in the movies and shows from America.
Zoe
Member
Now compare those salaries to white salaries for the same position.
In the groups I associate with, it's still rare for the different countries to mix up. It's mostly the Taiwanese who branch out.
I definitely have been seeing it more and more in the past 5 years or so here in Toronto. Myself, I've always appreciated beautiful women from all ethnic backgrounds, but because my circle has always been Asian due to the huge presence here, I've only ever had Asian girlfriends. I can totally understand an outsider seeing us as a clique-ish and unwilling to date outside the group because of this, even though I'm fairly certain all of my friends would happily date a white girl if one fell into their laps.
Myself, I'm living with a lovely Filipino - a group I hadn't ever really considered until I started seeing her. I'm 100% certain my mother would rather I was with a Chinese girl, while my dad is indifferent, but they're both okay with her. I probably would've gotten some heat if she was black (Chinese people are the most racist), but I've never been one to look for their approval when it comes to women - I know what I like, and that's all that matters to me.
I think Asian males are still considered by the general population as unexciting compared to white dudes, for sure, but I also think that more exposure to East Asian culture in general has resulted in more interest from non-Asians. Hell, I was in Michigan for labor day weekend and got more than a couple of welcoming smiles from white chicks - something I didn't really get the last time I was there, and that was maybe a year ago.
Myself, I'm living with a lovely Filipino - a group I hadn't ever really considered until I started seeing her. I'm 100% certain my mother would rather I was with a Chinese girl, while my dad is indifferent, but they're both okay with her. I probably would've gotten some heat if she was black (Chinese people are the most racist), but I've never been one to look for their approval when it comes to women - I know what I like, and that's all that matters to me.
I think Asian males are still considered by the general population as unexciting compared to white dudes, for sure, but I also think that more exposure to East Asian culture in general has resulted in more interest from non-Asians. Hell, I was in Michigan for labor day weekend and got more than a couple of welcoming smiles from white chicks - something I didn't really get the last time I was there, and that was maybe a year ago.
Dat reality. A lot of my friends have come to realize this and have started looking into doing business for themselves. At the top of every major corporation are the good ol' boys, and those guys aren't looking to share their spots with lowly Asians.
I see no way that would be strange.
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
It's dat Latino flava.
hydragonwarrior
Member
From my experience, it's easier for an Asian guy to date a girl who's not white or european - it sucks balls but that's how it is :/
That kind of reinforces the statements about the European Power structure in America working to to undermine Asian Males.
While divide and conquer was a tool used to separate the masses for centuries, it lost its power as we grew more educated. If A Latino or Black person also views an Asian as a partner in the struggle, then a connection is established.
Very rarely do I see Chinese men with women of a different race where I live (Mainland, Hong Konger) etc. But I do see a lot of Vietnamese and Filipino men date outside their race.
I think it has to do with whether you live in an area with a large immigrant population, as it tends to impact social norms in the area.
Where I live, white people tend to stay with white, punjabi with punjabi, asian with asian etc.
I think it has to do with whether you live in an area with a large immigrant population, as it tends to impact social norms in the area.
Where I live, white people tend to stay with white, punjabi with punjabi, asian with asian etc.
Zoe
Member
My father is half Spanish, but he doesn't look the slightest bit Latino. He gets mistaken for indigenous Vietnamese more.
LittleBoots
Member
Not really sure about this one. But whenever I see a couple that's mixed with one being white and the other being Asian, it's usually the woman that's Asian. I'm biracial-half white, half Chinese, and am dating a white guy. My mom is white and my dad is Chinese. I hear a lot of guys say they have preferences for Asian women, but I don't really hear of girls saying they have a preference for Asian men.
Sucks for him, I guess? Actually, my gf and her family in general openly express their relief at the fact that they don't have aboriginal features aside from complexion. It's a vain thing to say, but I'm just as glad, too.
I know, looks-ist.
@Joe I think it's safe to say that anyone looking to date someone outside of their ethnic group is going to experience a bit more resistance than someone working from within. Most people aren't comfortable with the unknown, and many groups have all kinds of stereotypes attached to them. I bet there's a white girl for him somewhere out there, though!
mob_skater
Member
I must be one of the exceptions because I'm Malaysian and I married a Ukranian. I lucked out.
It was about time somebody put the hurt on Ukraine
ahahaha
All the males in that movie might as well have been cardboard cutouts. Except the asian males are cardboard cutouts ON FIRE.
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
Location has a lot to do with it. I could understand it being harder in the rural midwest US for example than here in the SF area. Hell, my little brother's dating a white girl.
Cow Mengde
Banned
Here's my view on the issue. Race really doesn't matter, it's your culture and state of mind that matters more. I'm not super experienced, but I've been on both sides so I can at least share some info.
Status and money usually is a big factor with Chinese parents; and depending on the girl, it might be a big factor for her as well. There are certain expectations when dating between Chinese. So sometimes not only do you have to win the girl, but also her parents. Not saying western parents have lower standards, but money and status probably isn't high on most of their list. if the girl shares the same values as her parents, then you have double the trouble.
So for me, I'm more attracted to non-Asians because of those pressures. The second problem is a more personal one. I can't communicate with FOBs. We're two different worlds. My Chinese isn't good enough to talk about deeper things, and if their English isn't good, we also can't talk about things. Communication is important to me. So less pressure and communication issues means I put Asian girls much lower on my want to date list.
Status and money usually is a big factor with Chinese parents; and depending on the girl, it might be a big factor for her as well. There are certain expectations when dating between Chinese. So sometimes not only do you have to win the girl, but also her parents. Not saying western parents have lower standards, but money and status probably isn't high on most of their list. if the girl shares the same values as her parents, then you have double the trouble.
So for me, I'm more attracted to non-Asians because of those pressures. The second problem is a more personal one. I can't communicate with FOBs. We're two different worlds. My Chinese isn't good enough to talk about deeper things, and if their English isn't good, we also can't talk about things. Communication is important to me. So less pressure and communication issues means I put Asian girls much lower on my want to date list.
If you ever want a fun game get your buddies and some 3 cases of beer.
Take a drink every time she portrays an Asian male in a bad light in that film. When you get back from taking your friends to the hospital for alcohol poisoning you can add just another way Amy Tan has tried to kill the spirit of every Asian American male with her shallowness.
There are plenty of 2nd, 3rd, 4th and even 5th generation Asians living in NA that checks all your requiements. You're generalization seems to have roots in internalized racism. (Note: This is a very complex issue and I'm not calling you a racist, but something like this is very real and sometimes so subconscious that one doesn't even realize it)
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