Sibersk Esto
Banned
The true GoddessUm
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August Wrasslin |OT| When Russo Shoots, He Shoots To Kill
- Thread starter Hasney
- Start date
THE EL REY NETWORK.
lovely ladies
Member
I'm so lost in what they were referring to that it took me a few seconds to realize it wasn't about wrasslin'.
THUNDER IN PARADISE
LIGHTNING STRIKING TWICE
MESS WITH THUNDAAA AND YOU PAY THE PRICE
I ALREADY HAVE MAJOR PROBLEMS WITH THIS SHOW
This is the ship's exterior
This is the ship's interior
Is the ship a Tardis? Is Hulk Hogan a Doctor Who? Please tell me yes to both.
LIGHTNING STRIKING TWICE
MESS WITH THUNDAAA AND YOU PAY THE PRICE
I ALREADY HAVE MAJOR PROBLEMS WITH THIS SHOW
This is the ship's exterior
This is the ship's interior
Is the ship a Tardis? Is Hulk Hogan a Doctor Who? Please tell me yes to both.
Oprah Winfrey Network
Damn.
lovely ladies
Member
Hitman episode of Simpsons is gonna be on in a hour and a half (PST).
Hulk was only 41 in this show. Damn he looks like 68 here. Post-steroid trial Hogan is the shittiest of all Hogans. He's got NOTHING going on, and his hair curtain doesn't match his crazy comic book persona since he's so scrawny. And his lack of stubble offends me.
Hogan's a really shitty actor when he's not in promo mode. Like even for shlock like this, he's bad. He's great in promo mode though, like as Thunderlips.
What I'm saying is there should have been more coke on set.
#ReviewaThunderInParadise #Livecasting
Hogan got a good Big Boss thing going on with the eyepatch though. John Cena's gonna turn out to be a clone of Hogan who's dying because he's a clone or something. That's how MGS goes, right?
Hogan's a really shitty actor when he's not in promo mode. Like even for shlock like this, he's bad. He's great in promo mode though, like as Thunderlips.
What I'm saying is there should have been more coke on set.
#ReviewaThunderInParadise #Livecasting
Hogan got a good Big Boss thing going on with the eyepatch though. John Cena's gonna turn out to be a clone of Hogan who's dying because he's a clone or something. That's how MGS goes, right?
#ReviewaThunderInParadise #Livecasting
Hogan got a good Big Boss thing going on with the eyepatch though. John Cena's gonna turn out to be a clone of Hogan who's dying because he's a clone or something. That's how MGS goes, right?
Which wrestler was it that threw sand in his eye (after said wrestler lost an arm wrestling contest to Hogan) that caused Hogan to where the eyepatch?
Ninja Scooter
Member
I'm going to assume it was a member of the Dungeon of Doom because every batshit crazy Hogan angle involved his feud with the Dungeon of Doom.
Nothing is more batshit crazy than that motherfucker lusting after another man's wife and being the god damn babyface.
Ninja Scooter
Member
Liz was begging for it.
Dr Duncan Steel
Member
oh god. this now my go to thirsty gif now LMAO
Professor Beef
Banned
Hogan wasn't wrong.
Hogan has so many shitty one liners that I can't even discuss them. Like there's too many. The most I can discuss them is just by stating that they exist. Hogan still has an eyepatch on. This music is in that weird early 90s phase where it's SO 80s without being entirely so 80s. Like the remnants of the 80s. There's so much wailing power guitar, as you would expect from 'The Producers of Baywatch.' I've never seen Baywatch other than the episode with Macho Man and Hulk on Jet Skis and Vader popping some kids ball. Speaking of jet skis, Hogan STILL has an eyepatch on. His eyes been fucked up since 93. Oh I guess this would have been filmed... after Wrestlemania? I bet if you were a young Hulk Hogan fan in 1993 to 1994 you were confused as hell about Hulk and where he was working.
They have a short exchange about Hogan's eye which I assume was hot shotted in after the Jet Ski incident. Hogan is SO bad at acting. He's so flat. Everything he says is so flat, and it's extra noticeable when he's trying to be witty(which is all the time in this show). How is someone who cuts promos in front of millions for several years at this point, live, this bad at acting? Can he only do OVER THE TOP acting? If you ever wanted to know what Arnold would be like if Arnold wasn't naturally cool, it's Hogan acting.
Apparently their Tardis ship has some kind of stealth technology. Hogan has a buddy who I thought was gonna be his cool guy buddy like Duke and Flint, or like Riggs and Murtaugh, but you get a look at this creeps face, and you instantly go, 'Oh he's the doofus sidekick,' and he is. He's the 'SPENCEEEEEEE' guy. And he's a satellite hacker who makes fun of computer hackers. Take that 90s computer hackers. They keep showing this lady and her son in Cuba trying to sneak out. Like constantly. And lots of subtitled [speaks spanish]. Why not just tell me what they're saying in the subtitles? What's the harm? Hulk says they're here to free the lady and her son because some guy we haven't met or know anything about could get deported by Castro(cheap pop, brother) and he says it in the most 'Gah, don't you know anything!' matter of fact way to creep bag. I don't know his name, and I'm not going to use it until he earns me calling him by his name.
The whole cuban army is shooting at the boat because the boat's stealth sucks. Is Hogan part of the military or is he a baywatch guy? Seriously, they haven't told me ANYTHING. Also the guns shoot at the ship, but the ship is no selling it. Hogan taught you well, boat brother. THEYRE SHOOTING RPGS AT HOGAN ON A JET SKI HOLY SHIT THEY HATE HIM. Hogan has creepface dorksauce take over the jet ski on remote and Hogan dives in the water. What the fuck, Hogan isn't doing the backpedal! That's his thing! Hogan's swimming under this wooden boardwalk thing, and these dudes come up and fire assault rifles trying to hit him in the water through the boardwalk thing that looks really flimsy. Of course, there's no effects of the guns hitting the water when it shows Hogan in the water. Hogan goes under water to avoid the bullets AND LEAVES HIS MOUTH AND NOSE OPEN. HOW IS HE DOING THIS, BROTHER
This dude won't sell oxygen or bullets. Dudes shoot the platform up and fall into the water themselves. The music continues to be killer, and these dudes continue to spend about a months supply of bullets on one guy. Nothing happens. Nothing happens. Nothing happens. SURPRISE HOGAN DESCENDS OUT OF NOWHERE. Scared me. Hogan has all these guns, but I never see him use them. Hogan picks up the log and hits the dudes. I'm not making a gif, you've all seen it. It's basically the only thing anyone remembers from this show.
This is the face of a man who has killed before and takes pleasure in it. The ship is kind of cool with the top on. Looks like a boat tank. Apparently this ship can store a jetski inside of it, a major control station, a roof tall enough for 6'7" not to have to hunch over, and a separate room for the people they rescue. Hogan's acting gets a lot better when it's more action-y and high adrenaline. Oh they used to be Navy seals, and they do some dumb thing where they bump the back of their hands and then thumbs up together. SLOW MOTION SHOWS OF GIRLS ON THE BEACH BECAUSE BAYWATCH. Don Cesar hotel shown. Man that thing is huge. There's a dude in the background that looks like Rick Rude. Man, imagine this show with Rude instead of Hogan? It'd be like Magnum PI but way more fucking badass. And you could have Mr Perfect be his little boat driving hacker guy or Paul Heyman. I just saw Jimmy Hart. First non-Hogan wrestler cameo of the show. I looked over the dude in the background and it's definitely not Rude. Not ripped enough.
This old British dude and this old British woman rip into each other, and it's the highlight of the show so far. Some relatively attractive girl is talking about losing ownership of her hotel to this old British dude and if she gets married she doesn't lose it. GEE I THINK I MAY KNOW WHAT THIS HAS TO DO WITH OUR HEROES NOW. Cut to Hulk and creepface mcweirdo arriving at some dock all cheering with people welcoming them back with the kid. Aren't you guys Mercenaries? Why do you want this adoration?
Some little girl just came up and was happy to see Hulk. I think this may be his daughter? Hopefully she's prepared for when Tazz joins Aces and Eights in the future. Or is she the cute kid sidekick because its the 90s? HULK BUILT THE FUCKING SHIP OH MY GOD REALLY. She's the cute kid sidekick. How many years old do you think the demon is? 2000? Hulk's acting has improved a lot since the start of the show. Did he finally start caring? What a weird improvement.
So little girl is British lady(not the old one)'s daughter. She doesn't approve of Hulk, but they're going to get married probably because that clause thing. THIS IS JUST LIKE NO HOLDS BARRED. Hogan's acting got shitty again. What the fuck? THEY DID THE THUMBS UP THING AGAIN. Contemplative Hulk is being contemplative. They're having their deep argument moment now... Even though I just met these guys. And have no idea what they're talking about. Hogan has on blue jeans, no shirt, a black dew rag, an eyepatch, and cowboy boots. You can't make this up.
This happens. Whatever the hell 'this' is supposed to be. HOGANS GONNA GO HIT KAWALSKI. I REMEMBER THAT FROM THE START OF THE EPISODE. WAIT A MINUTE THAT OLD LADY IS MRS GARRETT HOLY SHIT. Mrs Garrett is way too good to be in this shlock.
Beefcake, Neidhart, and Jimmy Hart spotted. Kill me now. Brutus does the job. Like always. Apparently Neidhart is KAWALSKI! Arm wrestling match. Zoom in on the pythons. Hulk ain't doing the job to you Neidhart, brother.
GAH! Neidhart cheats and headbutts him. Hurricane(Hogan) no sells it and punches him in the face, dude. Hogan talks to British Lady. British Lady wants to pay Hogan money to marry him, the stud. Hogan leaves and gets on his motorcycle. He has a motorcycle now. He had a range rover before, but now he's got a motorcycle because that's cooler. He also has chaps and a helmet on now. Do bikers typically take off their chaps when they go into places? CONTEMPLATIVE MOTORCYCLE SCENE WITH SCREECHING GUITAR IN THE BACKGROUND FUCK YES THIS IS THE BEST SCENE God damn I thought this was an action show. We killed all those Cubans and the rest has been beach bullshit. Creepbag is making the moves on Carol Alt. I do like her accent.HES EXTRA CREEP MODEING OH JESUS Giant Gonzalez spotted! Oh jesus, I'm having flashbacks. Heard he was a super nice dude irl.
Hogan takes the wedding seriously enough to not wear his dew rag... But not serious enough to take off his sunglasses. THEY DID THE THUMBS UP THING AGAIN STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT A THING. Hogan makes out with some blonde. I bet making out with Hulk is fucking creepy. Dude's talking about pre-nups for the woman who's offering to pay off his oat because they're worried she'll get half of Thunder. IF SHE CAN PAY OFF THUNDER YOU GET HALF HER SHIT. YOU WIN OUT DIPSHIP(see what I did there). Nevermind, Hogan has a blue dew rag on for the wedding. Fancy. But fuck Hogan, some dude in the guest booths has ZUBAZ on! Oh my god. Fucking Brutus and Jimmy Hart are there. they're just background characters, why do they think we suddenly know who they are! Just Hogan's fucking bag boys getting tv time like in WCW.
FINALLY SOME ACTION! Hulkster with a spear! The necklace breaks. Well that was anti-climactic. Hogan gets punched! Hogan punches dude. OH NO GIANT GONZALEZ. OH NO THEYRE GONNA HAVE HIM FIGHT OH PLEASE NO
Better than Summerslam 93. Gonzalez runs into the limo. Man he's huge compared to that limo, I'm surprised he fits. Haha, Husband and wife, they don't get along. What a crazy, whacky relationship this will be! Giant Gonzalez is abducting british daughter and lady with the accent.
I need a break.
They have a short exchange about Hogan's eye which I assume was hot shotted in after the Jet Ski incident. Hogan is SO bad at acting. He's so flat. Everything he says is so flat, and it's extra noticeable when he's trying to be witty(which is all the time in this show). How is someone who cuts promos in front of millions for several years at this point, live, this bad at acting? Can he only do OVER THE TOP acting? If you ever wanted to know what Arnold would be like if Arnold wasn't naturally cool, it's Hogan acting.
Apparently their Tardis ship has some kind of stealth technology. Hogan has a buddy who I thought was gonna be his cool guy buddy like Duke and Flint, or like Riggs and Murtaugh, but you get a look at this creeps face, and you instantly go, 'Oh he's the doofus sidekick,' and he is. He's the 'SPENCEEEEEEE' guy. And he's a satellite hacker who makes fun of computer hackers. Take that 90s computer hackers. They keep showing this lady and her son in Cuba trying to sneak out. Like constantly. And lots of subtitled [speaks spanish]. Why not just tell me what they're saying in the subtitles? What's the harm? Hulk says they're here to free the lady and her son because some guy we haven't met or know anything about could get deported by Castro(cheap pop, brother) and he says it in the most 'Gah, don't you know anything!' matter of fact way to creep bag. I don't know his name, and I'm not going to use it until he earns me calling him by his name.
The whole cuban army is shooting at the boat because the boat's stealth sucks. Is Hogan part of the military or is he a baywatch guy? Seriously, they haven't told me ANYTHING. Also the guns shoot at the ship, but the ship is no selling it. Hogan taught you well, boat brother. THEYRE SHOOTING RPGS AT HOGAN ON A JET SKI HOLY SHIT THEY HATE HIM. Hogan has creepface dorksauce take over the jet ski on remote and Hogan dives in the water. What the fuck, Hogan isn't doing the backpedal! That's his thing! Hogan's swimming under this wooden boardwalk thing, and these dudes come up and fire assault rifles trying to hit him in the water through the boardwalk thing that looks really flimsy. Of course, there's no effects of the guns hitting the water when it shows Hogan in the water. Hogan goes under water to avoid the bullets AND LEAVES HIS MOUTH AND NOSE OPEN. HOW IS HE DOING THIS, BROTHER
This dude won't sell oxygen or bullets. Dudes shoot the platform up and fall into the water themselves. The music continues to be killer, and these dudes continue to spend about a months supply of bullets on one guy. Nothing happens. Nothing happens. Nothing happens. SURPRISE HOGAN DESCENDS OUT OF NOWHERE. Scared me. Hogan has all these guns, but I never see him use them. Hogan picks up the log and hits the dudes. I'm not making a gif, you've all seen it. It's basically the only thing anyone remembers from this show.
This is the face of a man who has killed before and takes pleasure in it. The ship is kind of cool with the top on. Looks like a boat tank. Apparently this ship can store a jetski inside of it, a major control station, a roof tall enough for 6'7" not to have to hunch over, and a separate room for the people they rescue. Hogan's acting gets a lot better when it's more action-y and high adrenaline. Oh they used to be Navy seals, and they do some dumb thing where they bump the back of their hands and then thumbs up together. SLOW MOTION SHOWS OF GIRLS ON THE BEACH BECAUSE BAYWATCH. Don Cesar hotel shown. Man that thing is huge. There's a dude in the background that looks like Rick Rude. Man, imagine this show with Rude instead of Hogan? It'd be like Magnum PI but way more fucking badass. And you could have Mr Perfect be his little boat driving hacker guy or Paul Heyman. I just saw Jimmy Hart. First non-Hogan wrestler cameo of the show. I looked over the dude in the background and it's definitely not Rude. Not ripped enough.
This old British dude and this old British woman rip into each other, and it's the highlight of the show so far. Some relatively attractive girl is talking about losing ownership of her hotel to this old British dude and if she gets married she doesn't lose it. GEE I THINK I MAY KNOW WHAT THIS HAS TO DO WITH OUR HEROES NOW. Cut to Hulk and creepface mcweirdo arriving at some dock all cheering with people welcoming them back with the kid. Aren't you guys Mercenaries? Why do you want this adoration?
Some little girl just came up and was happy to see Hulk. I think this may be his daughter? Hopefully she's prepared for when Tazz joins Aces and Eights in the future. Or is she the cute kid sidekick because its the 90s? HULK BUILT THE FUCKING SHIP OH MY GOD REALLY. She's the cute kid sidekick. How many years old do you think the demon is? 2000? Hulk's acting has improved a lot since the start of the show. Did he finally start caring? What a weird improvement.
So little girl is British lady(not the old one)'s daughter. She doesn't approve of Hulk, but they're going to get married probably because that clause thing. THIS IS JUST LIKE NO HOLDS BARRED. Hogan's acting got shitty again. What the fuck? THEY DID THE THUMBS UP THING AGAIN. Contemplative Hulk is being contemplative. They're having their deep argument moment now... Even though I just met these guys. And have no idea what they're talking about. Hogan has on blue jeans, no shirt, a black dew rag, an eyepatch, and cowboy boots. You can't make this up.
This happens. Whatever the hell 'this' is supposed to be. HOGANS GONNA GO HIT KAWALSKI. I REMEMBER THAT FROM THE START OF THE EPISODE. WAIT A MINUTE THAT OLD LADY IS MRS GARRETT HOLY SHIT. Mrs Garrett is way too good to be in this shlock.
Beefcake, Neidhart, and Jimmy Hart spotted. Kill me now. Brutus does the job. Like always. Apparently Neidhart is KAWALSKI! Arm wrestling match. Zoom in on the pythons. Hulk ain't doing the job to you Neidhart, brother.
GAH! Neidhart cheats and headbutts him. Hurricane(Hogan) no sells it and punches him in the face, dude. Hogan talks to British Lady. British Lady wants to pay Hogan money to marry him, the stud. Hogan leaves and gets on his motorcycle. He has a motorcycle now. He had a range rover before, but now he's got a motorcycle because that's cooler. He also has chaps and a helmet on now. Do bikers typically take off their chaps when they go into places? CONTEMPLATIVE MOTORCYCLE SCENE WITH SCREECHING GUITAR IN THE BACKGROUND FUCK YES THIS IS THE BEST SCENE God damn I thought this was an action show. We killed all those Cubans and the rest has been beach bullshit. Creepbag is making the moves on Carol Alt. I do like her accent.HES EXTRA CREEP MODEING OH JESUS Giant Gonzalez spotted! Oh jesus, I'm having flashbacks. Heard he was a super nice dude irl.
Hogan takes the wedding seriously enough to not wear his dew rag... But not serious enough to take off his sunglasses. THEY DID THE THUMBS UP THING AGAIN STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT A THING. Hogan makes out with some blonde. I bet making out with Hulk is fucking creepy. Dude's talking about pre-nups for the woman who's offering to pay off his oat because they're worried she'll get half of Thunder. IF SHE CAN PAY OFF THUNDER YOU GET HALF HER SHIT. YOU WIN OUT DIPSHIP(see what I did there). Nevermind, Hogan has a blue dew rag on for the wedding. Fancy. But fuck Hogan, some dude in the guest booths has ZUBAZ on! Oh my god. Fucking Brutus and Jimmy Hart are there. they're just background characters, why do they think we suddenly know who they are! Just Hogan's fucking bag boys getting tv time like in WCW.
FINALLY SOME ACTION! Hulkster with a spear! The necklace breaks. Well that was anti-climactic. Hogan gets punched! Hogan punches dude. OH NO GIANT GONZALEZ. OH NO THEYRE GONNA HAVE HIM FIGHT OH PLEASE NO
Better than Summerslam 93. Gonzalez runs into the limo. Man he's huge compared to that limo, I'm surprised he fits. Haha, Husband and wife, they don't get along. What a crazy, whacky relationship this will be! Giant Gonzalez is abducting british daughter and lady with the accent.
I need a break.
What's wrong with the Princess of Breakfast?
British Monsoon
Member
Maybe he wasn't, but knowing Randy had a jealous streak Hulk should've kept his eyes to himself, or at least upped his stealth game. Hogan so blatantly eye-humping Liz, full-well knowing Randy wouldn't take kindly to it, was just him trying to antagonise his supposed-friend and make him look like a jealous, possessive weirdo in the eyes of the audience and (as Hulk undoubtedly was hoping) in the eyes of Liz as well. What a manipulative son of a bitch.
Both Hogan and Liz were wrong. Liz eye fucked Hulk a lot and would end some promos saying things like "It's a date" while grabbing Hulk by the hand and dragging him off. They both did Randy dirty.
Oh yeah, Hogan was the reason I didn't really like wrestling until I found WCW Saturday Night.
British Monsoon
Member
The best and most bearable incarnation of that prototypical super-face character is and always will be Surfer Sting. Hogan's terrible.
I was watching a SNME a few weeks ago and Hogan's so MAD because Koloff is allowed to wave the Soviet flag, so he demands the match stipulation be for the right to display the flag. Hayes points out how this is 'MERICA and Koloff should be able to wave his flag, sing his anthem and Hogan shouldn't have the slightest problem with it, because FREEDOM, brother. But Hogan DOES have a problem, because he's a fucking intolerant asshole.
I was watching a SNME a few weeks ago and Hogan's so MAD because Koloff is allowed to wave the Soviet flag, so he demands the match stipulation be for the right to display the flag. Hayes points out how this is 'MERICA and Koloff should be able to wave his flag, sing his anthem and Hogan shouldn't have the slightest problem with it, because FREEDOM, brother. But Hogan DOES have a problem, because he's a fucking intolerant asshole.
Sting is the best super face, no doubt. Warrior was pretty good in the sense of he really wasn't a dick head like Hogan/HBK/Cena. He wasn't vengeful. He didn't cheat. He didn't attack non wrestlers. He also never really portrayed himself as this super force of goodness.
Fuck.Um
It wasn't just that. Even in his matches he was an asshole. The backrake, hitting people with chairs and just general cheating.
He was just the worst.
The real annoying part about Hogan matches was the commentary, who would say what Hulk was doing was fair since the heels do it, but then would bitch when the heels did it. I mean, the heel announcer pointing out Hogan being a cheater makes sense, because he's the heel and supposed to be hypocritical. But Vince/Gorilla would always 100% support whatever Hulk was doing, no matter how much he was cheating. Jesse would call the heels out for cheating, even if he supported it, while Vince/Gorilla would never say Hulk was cheating at all.
It might have been OSW Review who pointed out on of the WWF home videos had changed the audio for the 1992 Royal Rumble where Sid eliminating Hogan got cheers, and then booed when Hogan pulled on Sid's arm to pull him out.
Sounds like today's work with Cena, except they acknowledge it and turn it into a catch phrase.
Sounds like today's work with Cena, except they acknowledge it and turn it into a catch phrase.
Her episode features a shovel, but sadly no one gets berried.
It's been the original audio since the first DVD of the Rumbles were put ou.
WTF is going on here?
Man,WWE is so weird sometimes,I just got to see this video and know about all these 'great' gimmicks (Mordecai had a lot of potential though)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NoEpkTt8EAo
slightconfuse
Banned
njean777
Member
Yep, My Time was his best entrance music.
I liked it better without the lyrics. Rage soundalike guy made it too DX-like and Mr H had just left them behind
#thatmotherfucker
Dean ain't gonna argue...
D
Deleted member 47027
Unconfirmed Member
Bootaaay hates the USA and Hulk Hogan 