Nerdkiller
Membeur
So...did anyone watch the Top Gear finale? I'm currently going through it right now.
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BritGAF |OT6| Dark Souls? More like Arse Holes
- Thread starter JonathanEx
- Start date
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
I'm so fucking zen right now. I am the electric lizard boogaloo eating its own tail with chopsticks and a glass of God's own lemonade. I am made of stars and I can see through time.
I'm beyond petty human endeavours such as ratings and weekends and Top Gear.
I'm beyond petty human endeavours such as ratings and weekends and Top Gear.
What is your name?
In my late teens and early twenties I was the self-appointed High Queen of Fuck and then in my mid twenties coming out binge I became Madame Du Poop.
JonathanEx
Member
7/9. Had a lovely lamb roast, Saturday night drinks and a good swim. I like a nice weekend swim.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
I walk between the raindrops. Crows fly from my head whenever I doff my hat. I live between the cracks in the pavement. Everyone in the world is on drugs but me. I am Batman.
I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.
Those are pretty high falutin titles you had there, missy!
Applying the Ormerod factor of 6667666, your weekend was
46673662/60008994
Adding these together gives
106,682,656
And then dividing by 1 billion and expressing a percentage gives you an Langthorpe Percent of 11%
That's a pretty good weekend score, imo.
I did have a nervous breakdown!
broadwayrock
Member
NinjaBoiX
Member
Friday night - out round NQ then Mojo's, it was OK but most of the cool peeps weren't out (Eilidh's at Glastonbury, Elliot was at work, Maz was probably stoned), still had a canny night. Didn't spend a ridiculous amount either.
- 7/10
Saturday - lazy lie in, got up, played games for a bit, ate, slept some more, shower then work. But it was a top night at work! Decent crowd, generous punters and the DJ's were on point, bosh!
- 8/10
Sunday - up late, more games, then bike ride and beers with the bro. Back home for tasty beef stew and veg, a bit of Glastonbury on telly, then bed. Slept like shit but eh, I'll sleep tonight innit.
- 7/10
(Ex decided to get in touch which kind of twisted my melon. She wasn't a dick or anything, but still, ugh. -0.5)
Overall weekend score = 7/10 - room for improvement
- 7/10
Saturday - lazy lie in, got up, played games for a bit, ate, slept some more, shower then work. But it was a top night at work! Decent crowd, generous punters and the DJ's were on point, bosh!
- 8/10
Sunday - up late, more games, then bike ride and beers with the bro. Back home for tasty beef stew and veg, a bit of Glastonbury on telly, then bed. Slept like shit but eh, I'll sleep tonight innit.
- 7/10
(Ex decided to get in touch which kind of twisted my melon. She wasn't a dick or anything, but still, ugh. -0.5)
Overall weekend score = 7/10 - room for improvement
I already warned you, they're my band. Back off.
So weird that they've got #1 album
I fell asleep during the first segment. Woke up and finished the rest. The ending made me feel quite sad.
Wasn't expecting to feel this way. About Top Gear.
Rubbish King
The gift that keeps on giving
Level 27 in destiny, I've been playing for three days now and I feel like this has been a bad idea as I find it impossible to leave the TV and xbox alone for too long
broadwayrock
Member
They're no.2. Florence sold 528 more albums than them.
1. Hahahahahahahahahahaha welcome to crack land
2. Yay! Join the mini Brit GAF gang. We will get you to 34 in no time
3. Oh bugger you're on Xbox
CyclopsRock
Member
7/9 I think. Friday night got hammered with the gang from work is gorgeous, lovely Clerkenwell. Saturday went over to the missus's for a nice little BBQ (btw guys, always use Zonal Heating - it's so much better than normal coal distribution. If anyone wants to talk about coal distribution at length, I'm ready to throw down). Sunday we had a pretty boring day of going over to the place we're moving into on Saturday and walking to the train station to get the route down (doesn't matter much for me, but for my poor girlfriend we move in on saturday and she starts her new job on the monday - not a good time to be getting lost on the way to the train station!) Fairly dull but I'm pretty excited about the move. Time to go buy a £30 stolen bike on Gumtree.
Jackben
bitch I'm taking calls.
At least you're admitting the likely origin of the bike. I told a friend who got a brand new looking bike off craigslist for cheap that 99% chance it was stolen and he refused to aknowledge it.
Also I may regret this but I'd like to know what you mean by zonal heating in the context of coal distribution.
Also I may regret this but I'd like to know what you mean by zonal heating in the context of coal distribution.
Ohhh OK.
They were looking to be #1 midweek.
That's still crazy, though. The album isn't even very good by their standards. They totally ruined You're a Germ.
4/9
Was working night shifts which were pretty boring but I found that I can cycle to work with my joystick in my bag so that meant I got to play Elite: Dangerous for 12 hours straight one night.
Apart from that not much else happened. Housemate went on a binge at Pride so I didn't see her at all, which sucks because the last time I did see her I was a drunken mess and kept her awake by talking really loudly with my brother. My fiancee was off doing her karaoke hosting so I barely got to talk to her either. And working night shifts over a weekend when all your mates are off doing awesome things and you have to sit around and see pictures pop up on Facebook whilst you're figuratively crying into your Hovis is pretty rubbish.
Was working night shifts which were pretty boring but I found that I can cycle to work with my joystick in my bag so that meant I got to play Elite: Dangerous for 12 hours straight one night.
Apart from that not much else happened. Housemate went on a binge at Pride so I didn't see her at all, which sucks because the last time I did see her I was a drunken mess and kept her awake by talking really loudly with my brother. My fiancee was off doing her karaoke hosting so I barely got to talk to her either. And working night shifts over a weekend when all your mates are off doing awesome things and you have to sit around and see pictures pop up on Facebook whilst you're figuratively crying into your Hovis is pretty rubbish.
Aww poor Cas (I'm trying this out as your name). Don't feel bad. Your time will come. You should befriend me on Facebook and that way instead of social stuff you can just get status updates about Question Time.
show me your skeleton
Member
my weekend was 6/9 because i ate a nice pizza on saturday but worked on sunday.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
Love the name, Sploat! Might help those folk who think my name has a U after the QAnd I'd totally add you on FB if you're ok with the occasional post about how much I love Saturday Kitchen.
Q AND NOT U
Can we please have the discussion about coal distribution? It sounds fascinating.
Love the name, Sploat! Might help those folk who think my name has a U after the Q
I am OK with this.
Musha_Soturi
Member
-1/9
My phone got stolen
I met friends for dinner after work on Friday. Between walking from the restaurant to the station some fucker had taken my phone out of my rucksack. Bastards.
I feel like I've lost a limb. My whole life was on that phone.
I've bought a cheap tesco mobile for now, but with no insurance it looks like I'm going to have to pay full whack for a new phone. I'm going to give it a couple of weeks in the vain hope it might turn up, but I'm being realistic about that probability.
Fuckers. I spent most of yesterday trawling ebay and gumtree looking for it.
dapperbandit
Banned
Mine was a solid 9.
Went down to Devon with a dozen or so mateys. We stayed in a big ole farm house with a full size snooker table, jacuzzi hot tub and a good stash of board games.
On Saturday we went to the beach, played frisbee and volleyball, dug a hole that was at least three feet deep, went for a swim and threw dead jellyfish at one another. I burned in the sun the way only a true white devil can. A barbecue was had in the evening upon our return, and after meat and wine we got wankered on wacky tobaccy in the hot tub and apparently all got naked.
Sunday was hungover hiking day. There was picturesque scenery, perilous rocks to scramble upon and goats to mock. This was more physically and spiritually demanding as a day but still a good time was had.
All in all, a ridiculous amount of alcohol was consumed and hours of collective Christopher Walken impressions were delivered, it was ferociously good.
There's no way to say this without sounding melodramatic but I think I had such a good time that reality just hit me like a ton of bricks today. Today really was like a 2/9, one of the worst days of my life, only a few times in my life have I experienced such depression and dread. The grim reality of going back to work, along with the scant four hours of nightmare riddled sleep (nightmares of car crashes on country roads) I got before rising at six today left me in a sorry state, like a trembling newborn deer trying to walk, but sadder. Part of that was also down to a toxic cocktail of insecurities that came from nowhere as soon as I got home yesterday... speaking plainly, I think I got my heart broken, if but delicately and perhaps mostly in my imagination.
All of which leads me to the realization that I need to get a relationship going ASAP, this forever alone bullshit needs to end.
Argh! That's awful!!!!!!! Sorry to ask the obvious, but have you done all the necessaries like ensuring your provider has shut down your account etc?
I know what it's like to lose a phone and it's fucking awful.
Sounds like you had an average weekend overall but two really big extremes. Existential dread is an absolute bugger. Make sure you get some sleep and eat good food / drink water!
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I've spent the entire day rushing from one meeting to another and now have a gigantic backlog of actual work to do. I'm also about to rush off from the office to go to another Buddhist class but left both a mini deodorant and some powder at home which means that because the mediation hall has no air conditioning I may leave a shiny and sweaty glob of slime and have to squelch home. At least I'll be spiritually harmonious.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
My wife just said she's getting me a PS4 for my birthday. I married well.
Hooray!
Does this mean that er we might end up in a party chat one day?
I'm kind of worried about the fate of the universe, you see.
toythatkills
Member
show me your skeleton
Member
The family got together yesterday, squabbles aside, to celebrate three birthdays, my sister's, my niece's, and my secondary birthday, which must have been lovely for my mum, whereas for me it's kinda tough going: as soon as you get up, you've lost your seat, now stand till the next person makes that same mistake!
#bigfamilytroubles
#bigfamilytroubles
Can't stand it. I really don't do well with heat at all, which is making me dread my future brother-in-law's wedding in Cyrpus next month. No one wants a giant, sweaty mess in their wedding photos, right?
I'm getting dragged off to watch cricket later on today too with my brother and dad. They're both really into it but I've never been one for team sports, but at least I'll be getting lagered up in the sunshine with the family so I'm kinda looking forward to it.
I'm getting dragged off to watch cricket later on today too with my brother and dad. They're both really into it but I've never been one for team sports, but at least I'll be getting lagered up in the sunshine with the family so I'm kinda looking forward to it.
Who's playing?
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
Part of the deal to to get the PS4 involves me cutting out my tongue.
Isn't that bad for her too?
Your wife is a smart lady. Sometimes I wish I had a spare tongue.
You'd know this if you actually friended me on Facebook (as would you all, yes Facebook is my current thing now yes blah) but...
I'd like to hereby extend an invite to all members of BritGAF who feel they have had enough of bending to the whims of the sun. The "Persistent Winter Society" or "PWS" was established on Tuesday 30 June 2015 ("Founder's Day") in order to form an allied front against the tyranny of the Summer season and its incessant demands on us to "Go out and get some sun yay!", "Isn't it lovely out yay!" and "oooh it's such a nice day yay!".
The PWS believes that:
- one should continue dressing for winter during summer as a show of proud defiance
- one should "come out" and speak proudly and publicly about preferring winter to summer
- one should acknowledge that aside from Christmas, so-called "nice weather" is one of the greatest killers humankind has ever known - just look at Ethiopia
- one should at all times promote winter as not just a state of season but a state of mind and being
Join today! The PWS is calling YOU
Surrey V Gloucestershire at The Oval. Surrey is the "family team".
Count me in! Now to just figure out who you are on Facebook...!
show me your skeleton
Member
#onyourfeetloseyourseat
31 degrees in Manchester, bloody hell. We're going on a trip to Chester Zoo tomorrow after it's cooled down, there's supposed to be a storm on the way.
show me your skeleton
Member
it was 28c in work yesterday, i imagine it's even worse today. thanks for skipping out on air con/cooling of any kind!
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
Nah, it's a pretty smart move. Means she doesn't have to drag me away from the
She'll probably hook it up to a car battery or saink.
Urban dictionary is so underrated.