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[Hollywood]

He's breaking out more quotes than good ol' JR .. LOL

This election is closer than a sliver of soup ... and other quotes .. wtf is he saying? LOL

 

[Ninja Scooter]

when he said "We might need to bring in Billy Crystal to Analyze This..." i changed the channel. Quickly.

 

[Boogie]

You know, we have an "official election thread" for a reason.

 

[Hollywood]

Last I checked, Dan Rather wasn't running in the election.

 

[Escape Goat]

He's breaking out more quotes than good ol' JR .. LOL

This election is closer than a sliver of soup ... and other quotes .. wtf is he saying? LOL

You completely butchered that quote.

"Kerry's lead in Iowa is as thin as tournip soup."

 

[Hollywood]

Yeah because I didn't know what he said .. I can't understand a damn thing he says. Just now he was talking about a swans feathers being wet or some shit. I think he got wasted before he got on the air.

 

[hooded pitohui]

and you completely butchered turnip

 

[MASB]

lol. My political science professor told me to watch Rather. Said if 2000 was anything to go by, Rather would start to crack up after midnight.

 

[Grizzlyjin]

You completely butchered that quote.

"Kerry's lead in Iowa is as thin as tournip soup."

That made me go "WTF!?" He has been pulling out those phrases all night, and sometimes they feel VERY VERY VERY forced. Like even he doesn't want to say them. :lol

He went on some long ass quote about tails on fire and backs against the wall, I turned the channel at that point.

 

[Grizzlyjin]

"This race is hot enough to peel the paint off the houses."

No Dan Rather...just no...

 

[Hollywood]

LOL I just heard that ... still couldnt understand him ... oh man its too late.. LOL

 

[Alex Anderson]

Imagine how much fun he'll be if he's still kickin in 2008

 

[Escape Goat]

and you completely butchered turnip

Ehhh, I don't care. Its late and I'm hungry.

 

[impirius]

In case anyone has forgotten:

RATHERISMS FROM ELECTION NIGHT 2000
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/blratherisms.htm

"It's a ding dong battle back and forth!"

 

[Hollywood]

"8 states are sitting like ripe fruit" LOL

 

[Grizzlyjin]

In case anyone has forgotten:

RATHERISMS FROM ELECTION NIGHT 2000
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/blratherisms.htm

"It's a ding dong battle back and forth!"

Oh god, those are awesome. I hope Rather is back in 2008, those quotes are the only reason I'm still watching CBS. These cheesy lines are funny as hell when you've been watching election coverage for over 6 hours. :lol

 

[RedDwarf]

"This will show you how tight it is — it's spandex tight." That's site's great! :lol

 

[Son of Godzilla]

"Bush may not have the whip hand, but he's got the lead hand, but it's still breathtakingly close"

Holy crap, you can just change the channel to cbs and hear a ratherism.

 

[Hollywood]

Election 2008 dream team: Dan Rather, John Madden, and Jim Ross. :lol

 

[PS2 KID]

Hilarious!

"This race is tight like a too-small bathing suit on a too-long ride home from the beach."

 

[Ninja Scooter]

"This race is tighter than a 13 year old asian girl."

 

[Mike Works]

From IRC earlier tonight;

<Mike_Works> <Rather> Yes, but that fits in with what we say, if a frog had sidepockets, he'd carry a handgun. <Mike> If a.. frog....
<Mike_Works> <Dan Rather> I know that you'd rather walk through a furnace in a gasoline suit than react to John Kerry possibly losing this election. <Mike> YEAH! FUCKING EUPHAMISMS ABOUND! YOU'RE MY BOY, BLUE!

There was another one that I typed out, but I'd closed the window. Those quotes are authentic.

 

[impirius]

I just heard "the anti-marriage referendums..." With that and stuff like "pro choice" versus "anti-abortion-rights", Rather wears his stances on his sleeve as much as he can.

But man, you've gotta love the Ratherisms

 

[impirius]

Did I hear that right?

"tee-tortally, me-mortally convinced"

 

[mightynine]

Did I hear that right?

"tee-tortally, me-mortally convinced"

Good. You heard it too. I'm not going insane.

 

[Late Stage Marxist]

and you completely butchered turnip

 

[impirius]

Good. You heard it too. I'm not going insane.

Thank goodness! I've just been sitting here in a daze, wondering if my brain just scrambled that.

"This is their story, this is their song, and they're gonna keep on playing it all night long."

Hahaha, he resurrected a classic: "We don't know whether to wind our watch or bark at the moon or what to do here"

 

[Grizzlyjin]

"Closer than Lassie and Timmy all night long..."

I need sleep.

 

[Particle Physicist]

"Closer than Lassie and Timmy all night long..."

I need sleep.

:lol

"we are on this like white on rice"

man, every other sentence !


how come cbs's count is closer than the other news stations?

dont they all get their numbers from the same place?

 

[Grifter]

:lol at "beat them like a rented mule"

 

[Late Stage Marxist]

how come cbs's count is closer than the other news stations?

dont they all get their numbers from the same place?

CBS and CNN have the same count. Not sure about other stations. I think Fox had bush at 269 not surprisingly.

 

[impirius]

CBS and CNN have the same count. Not sure about other stations. I think Fox had bush at 269 not surprisingly.

Fox and MSNBC have Bush carrying Ohio and standing at 269 electoral votes. All stations have called MN and MI for Kerry except MSNBC, which still has Kerry at 211.

 

[Fifty]

Are the network anchors still going!?!

 

[xexex]

CBSNEWS Dan Rather - delusional -1,000,000

NBCNEWS Tom Brokaw - rational +1,000,000

 

[impirius]

Oh lordy, Ed Bradley is telling Rather that it's pretty much a given that Bush will carry Ohio based on the ballots yet to be counted. Rather seems horrified.

"Just because a chicken has wings doesn't mean he can fly"

"The Good Book says that the race is not always to the swift nor the battle to the strong, but the reporters are saying that that's the way to bet it"

 

[Doth Togo]

Sadly, Rather was a very strong icon for many years in the news. These days, he's losing it like OJ beating up Ron Goldman.

 

[Diablos]

Dan Rather needs to retire, he's getting too old. I couldn't watch CBS last night. It took him 20 seconds to spit out whatever it is he wanted to say.

 

[dem]

At the start of last night he said something along the lines of:
We're just starting to dip our bicuits in the gravy

 

[Eminem]

Election 2008 dream team: Dan Rather, John Madden, and Jim Ross. :lol

eeeen the cankles on that candidate are so big...

 

[Escape Goat]

At the start of last night he said something along the lines of:
We're just starting to dip our bicuits in the gravy

:lol

 

[Tamanon]

Like a big wheel through a cotton field.

 

[mightynine]

Now I'm thinking Dan and good ol' JR would make a helluva Raw announce team.

That, or all of our heads would explode trying to keep up with all the -isms.

 

[Escape Goat]

At the start of last night he said something along the lines of:
We're just starting to dip our bicuits in the gravy

Didn't someone have a tag along the lines of "dipping dicks in the gravy" :lol

 

[FortNinety]

when he said "We might need to bring in Billy Crystal to Analyze This..." i changed the channel. Quickly.

You've got to be kidding me.

 

[MetatronM]

Election 2008 dream team: Dan Rather, John Madden, and Jim Ross. :lol

:lol

Madden: And so you see, this one candidate came in and went BOOM BOOM BOOM and won more votes than the other guy. You know, Dan, what you need to do in an election is win more votes than the other guy. Otherwise it's gonna be a lot harder for you to win.

JR: My Gawd, Maine is splitting its electoral votes! By GAWD, Maine has been broken in HAIYUF! We need some help out here!

Rather: And just like that this race has gotten more interesting than a transexual hang-glider caught up in the old oak tree.

 

[Alcibiades]

http://www.mediaresearch.org/cyberalerts/2004/cyb20041104.asp#5

Night of Danisms: "Race is Hotter than
a Times Square Rolex"

After pleading with viewers to vote ("We've got guys fighting in Iraq, Afghanistan. If they can do what they do, you can get off your duff and go vote"), on election night Dan Rather delivered another night of "Ratherisms" or Danisms," such as: "George Bush is sweeping through the South like a big wheel through a Delta cotton field," "This presidential race is hotter than the Devil's anvil," "The race is, you know, it's humming along like Ray Charles," "This race is hotter that a Times Square Rolex," "Situation in Ohio would give an aspirin a headache" and "John Kerry, his lead is as thin as turnip soup."

At about 7:48pm EST, Rather pleaded: "The polls are still open in many, many states in our great United States of America. If you've not yet voted, we urge you to go to the polls and vote. You may say 'Well, I'm too tired' or what have you. No excuses. We've got guys fighting in Iraq, Afghanistan. If they can do what they do, you can get off your duff and go vote. Then come back and watch us."

The MRC's Brian Boyd on Wednesday went through the Tuesday night video and took down some of Rather's odd observations:

From just past 8pm EST:
-- "Illinois, Land of Lincoln, Land of John Kerry for tonight. Play a verse of Johnny Be Good in Illinois for John Kerry. Twenty-one electoral votes we estimate he'll get there."

-- "In Missouri, the Show Me State, show me insufficient data."

-- "George Bush is sweeping through the South like a big wheel through a Delta cotton field."

-- "This brings us to our projection of right now George Bush with 80 electoral votes, John Kerry with 77. This presidential race is hotter than the Devil's anvil."

From a little past 9pm EST:
-- "Kansas, six electoral votes. You know they say 'never gamble with strangers,' never bet against a Republican in Kansas."

-- "New Mexico, Land of Enchantment. Each of the candidates was hoping it would be their land of enchantment."

-- "George Bush is sweeping through the Midwest now like a big combine."

9:43pm EST:
-- "The race is, you know, it's humming along like Ray Charles, but there are increasingly fewer decisions until some of those states in the West get closed."

Interview with Joe Lockhart at 12:14am EST:
-- "I know that you'd rather walk through a furnace in a gasoline suit than consider the possibility that John Kerry would lose Ohio because, will you agree, the figures don't lie, Kerry can not win if he doesn't carry Ohio?"

-- "What about Michigan? It's been out there a long time. Is that making your fingernails sweat?"

Wednesday's Late Show with David Letterman ran a compilation of Rather cracks, including:

-- "This presidential race, you know, it's been crackling like a hickory fire for at least the last hour and a half."

-- "This race is hotter than a Times Square Rolex and it has been all night long."

-- "Situation in Ohio would give an aspirin a headache."

-- "John Kerry, his lead is as thin as turnip soup."

I can't stop laughing and I'm in a quite computer lab...

 

[Guzim]

He's breaking out more quotes than good ol' JR .. LOL

This election is closer than a sliver of soup ... and other quotes .. wtf is he saying? LOL

JR "Orton needs to make hay while the sun is shining.”
Tazz "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

 

[Loki]

:lol

Man, some of those quotes are hysterical.


"Hotter than a Times Square Rolex" indeed... :lol