Is there any way to deal cause frankly I"m sick of just not putting effort into any interest, even that of games, I'd just rather wave it off and sit here doing nothing.
What the hell...
I have GAD, mebbe SAD, also ADHD and OCD just the O. Mebbe depression too not sure. I was diagnosed with GAD and ADHD offically not armchairing it.
It was so bad I got kicked out of college because I couldnt keep it together...three times. Least I kept trying eh?
I've been on pretty much every SSRI and some other shit as well but none of it really helped...did make me explode like the girl from Willy Wonka though.
I have hypogonadisim and EXTREMELY low testosterone. So I think alot of my issues are related to to hormonal stuff which could explain why I haven't responded well to traditional pschytropic medication.
Anyway right now I'm trying to treat myself with nootropics, vitamins, supplements and anything the internet says might help. So far no luck but theres plenty of shit I haven't tried yet.
Anyone have any suggestions for safe supplements that help with anxiety and/or increase testosterone production? Preferbly ones that dont build tolerance so I dont have to cycle and dont have crazy side effects?
Right now I'm trying Theanine and Ashwaganda to little effect. Just started trying Insotil, hopefully that might help.
Have you tried getting actual testosterone replacement from an actual doctor?
Have you tried getting actual testosterone replacement from an actual doctor?
I got TRT injections but they made me extremely emotionally unstable and depressed. I read that might be just because it was injections and not TRT itself. But before I try gel or something I was hoping to treat the disease not the symptom (figure out why my testosterone is low and try to fix it instead of taking artifical testosterone).
Also TRT shrinks your nuts, causes infertility, and long term use of TRT requires special "coming down" treatment in order for your body to produce its own testosterone again.
1. That's really interesting; I've never heard of such a response. Were you being administered something basic like cypionate/enanthate? How much? How long were you on? How did you stop treatment?
2. If you have extremely low test, HRT is probably a permanent thing; why would you ever go off if your natural production is shot as is? Your concerns of "coming off" thus don't seem pertinent.
3. HRT can lower sperm count but plenty of people have kids while on. You should be able to indicate to the doctor that fertility is a concern, after which you will be given ancillary compounds to assist with that. Bodybuilders on the harshest regimes on the planet get people pregnant; it is thus oversimplistic to say HRT matter-of-factly "causes infertility." At best, it lowers the probability by some indeterminate amount. That seems less pressing than the health problems you are liable to have from low test.
4. The facts presented in 3. apply equally well to your ballbag: there's a chance shrinkage will happen, there are compounds that prevents it, and, in any case, it doesn't seem to be as pressing an issue as the detrimental health effects of low test.
4. There is nothing remotely comparable to HRT as far as getting test levels up. The supplement industry is rife with crap products that promise much but have no demonstrated efficacy. HRT is the most powerful tool you've got for getting test levels up to the normal range; wasting money on alternatives will not get you far at all.
Everything seems pointless, hopeless, worthless, and shitty.
I was on 20MG for like half a year and just went cold turkey. Felt really badly the first couple of weeks, had very distinct withdrawal systems (serious case of diziness)
Otherwise, though, feeling way happier and stronger (more independent) than I have in a long time. Haven't taken a med for maybe a year now. The lexapro seemed to have a positive effect, but I also felt like it made me more docile and tired. I preferred to open myself up to depression but have more energy throughout the day and just learn new coping skills.
I would ultimately recommend talking to a doctor, though, on how to ween yourself off.
Right?
I can't really go into detail because my laptop is out for repair and I'm on mobile GAF, but I've been really down on myself lately. Feels like im getting worse rather than better. I'm not very religious, but any prayers or positive vibes are appreciated.
Is thinking about suicide alot depression?
I mean I am not sad all the time, usually I am pretty down when I have to talk to other people/socialize (not that I hate people) but it makes me feel really really bad when I do.
But when I am by myself I am either bored, happy, down, etc. I guess that is normal. I always have thoughts of suicide at least once a day for the past years 8+ I think. I do not know if it is necessarily depression though.
Anyways I hope everyone in this topic gets better and if you need to type your problems to me in pm for some reason I will listen. Do not know what else to post other than that.
Everything seems pointless, hopeless, worthless, and shitty.
I had four days in a row off from work and I slept over 60 hours during that period.
i'd love to be put under that that period of time.
i'd love to be put under that that period of time.
No, it's awful. I have no motivation to do anything and I'm always completely drained of energy.
Very true.Throw a dart. Pick one. Achieve it. Ignore the rest...for now. (I would personally recommend getting a job...it's concrete and relatively short-term.)
True, I guess I should be happy I have a lot of potential career choices.You're saying this like it's a bad thing. Many people don't even have 1 career path they want to take. You should be happy that you've got options. Career is a long term goal, so there's no point judging it now. It's like a 14 year old kid worried about getting a degree.
I think it would be possible to achieve all of that, yeah. It's just a headache to keep up with it all.Seems like you're in too much of a hurry to achieve your goals. If you gave yourself 3 years to achieve all the above, do you think that would be possible?
I can't really go into detail because my laptop is out for repair and I'm on mobile GAF, but I've been really down on myself lately. Feels like im getting worse rather than better. I'm not very religious, but any prayers or positive vibes are appreciated.
I had four days in a row off from work and I slept over 60 hours during that period.
Having a bad night right now and feeling very low. I went out to a white party with a friend who wanted me to meet his other friend and see if we hit it off and of course i have bad luck because he was not interested at all. I am so sick of being rejected and failing all the time. Buying stupid crap online isn't giving me the high i usually feel right now. I wish i had some drug that can just alter the way i am feeling and thinking. Just thinking i am not fit for this life at all.
I'm going to a concert tomorrow night, which is, like, the first thing I've actually looked forward to aside from A) weekends, B) food, and C) Breaking Bad in months. It's a nice feeling to have. Just wish I had more interests or hobbies or anything these days.
I already feel that way. Thinking of taking a few melatonin pills lock my door and sleep until the next day. Every second my mind wanders to the club from last night and all i can think how i am a miserable stupid loser.
I wasn't going to post here. It's embarrassing because I thought I had gotten over this.
I've always been a bit depressed, but I've managed to deal with it my own ways. I had my first panic attack Friday in four months. It really destroyed my energy and I was just so angry about it. I'm never angry. I don't even get frustrated but I was on the way to getting myself banned here and blew up even though I told myself to avoid Gaf earlier in the day.
I can not help but notice the looks people give me not all the time but when they do are that of disgust (I do not think myself some shining beacon that is glanced upon rather that when people look at me).
I do not always say the right things and do bad things some times. I feel that as a species there is some sort of filter going on and I think that my suicidal thoughts that have been occurring for a while are a consequence of the collective. Evolution is trying to cut out the dead weight in my view and that is why I keep having suicidal thoughts.
Seriously screw today.
heidern said:Seems like you're in too much of a hurry to achieve your goals. If you gave yourself 3 years to achieve all the above, do you think that would be possible?
I think it would be possible to achieve all of that, yeah. It's just a headache to keep up with it all.
Anyway perhaps I should plan all of my goals out and how I'll achieve them?
Yes definitely do this, having everything written down will give you clarity.
So if someone doesn't have any goals what is the point of living? I really don't have any goals to think of.
Unless like me you are the kind of person who will then use said list as a reason to hate yourself (look at how worthless I am, I didn't get anything/enough from the list done today). I know it's a bad day when I'm lying in bed, I need to get up for work and the first intelligible thought is along the lines of "get out of bed you lazy worthless piece of shit".
Reading this in the voice and image of your avatar is a completely disarming and diabetes - inducing experience XD
Now talking seriously, the whole "I am always a bit depressed" is worring, really. The problem with minds is that since we are always in our own brain and head, we have nothing to compare our mental states with, so these kind of constant depressive states easily becomes our "new normal": don't allow it. Search for psychological help before you get your next panic attack, pleeeeease.
And regarding forum rage (which is something that I have also fell for), remember these:
- Being right in a conversation or debate is not the end and ultimate goal of your existance
- Verbally beating down another person is a cheap way to satisfy our ego
- When you became too invested into a debate, analyze yourself: you are not interested in winning the debate per se, but rather in being right and extracting a feeling of self - steem by the virtue of being right.
Use your own feelings as a guideline. I am pretty sure that like any human, you have had your good times, too, even if nowadays you feel like crap. Try to remember what makes you happy, or what used to make you feel happy. Try to remember which situations or memories you remember fondly, and try to see what was the common pattern in them. Also, try to grasp in which little moments of the day you have felt better, even if was a little thing (say, you heard a song in the radio that you liked, or you beated someone playing CoD online, whatever). After you have made that small recap, you will have someone to work on it: you will know what makes you feel better, and you will be able to replicate or try to replicate these situations.
.
So, when your mind is clouded with negative emotion, how do you differentiate between good advice and advice given from a standpoint that lacks an understanding of depression? My high-strung Type A sister has been pushing me really hard recently, and while she gives perfectly good advice for self-improvement like getting on a routine, taking up a hobby, exercising regularly, etc. she frames my lack of motivation in terms of calling me immature, lazy, selfish, wallowing in self-pity, implies I have a mental handicap, etc. Going back to her personality, she thinks that because she personally doesn't have the power to solve my emotional issues that they must be my own fault. I want to take some of her advice to heart, but when she makes it so personal, I feel like I'm validating her hurtful assumptions about my personal flaws if I conform to her ways.
It's strange because she has a degree in psychology and even deals with depression issues herself--it's just that because her emotional problems have never translated into a lapse in normal habits for her, she sees no reason why it shouldn't be the same for me. I'm actually unmedicated for my problems because she convinced my parents to threaten to kick me out of their house if I took antidepressants due to the miniscule risk that I might become violent as a side effect. I suppose that feeling better is worth "validating" her, but as shitty as I feel I still have a little pride and would like to believe that I'm suffering from a legitimate problem and I'm not just being the things I'm being labeled as.
To be fair, it wasn't really a debate. I know better than to join in on anything I'm not comfortable with and respect everyone's opinions regardless. This was a single mostly hateful opinion which affected me personally and garnished a bunch of circle jerk posts all ignoring the irony of the initial statement. I wasn't in the mood for that. It didn't skirt the line enough to be considered ban worthy. I asked the poster if they could clarify, which revealed the motivations I expected. At that point, I was ready to speak my mind about the hateful nature of their post (not nicely) but decided against it last minute.
That won't work for me. The thing that made me very happy also makes me very upset even thinking about it now bothers me. I hope this ECT treatment whatever it is lobotomzies my brain, there is no hope. Things does not get better for everyone, especially losers like me.
Mentally, it's basically helping you find peace with your current self and having a positive outlook on the future. Which is what the mind needs to be happy. A lot of people have constant negative thoughts they need to stop. Jesus in the bible says things like there's no need to worry, and etc. But, conversely, there's a lot of hateful, paranoid, and judgmental religious people that seem to live in fear. Everyone should find a way to be at peace with their time on Earth and enjoy it in a way that makes sense to them personally. Religion or not.I don't know if anyone will remember, but I also posted in this thread complaining about my life, how I felt... honestly, I found the solution.
I know many (if not ALL) of you will say it's bullshit, that you disagree, etc. I know it because I thought the same before. But I changed my mind.
I have a very good friend (a friend's mother) who always helped me a lot. One day she talked to me about God, that I needed God in my life, and all that stuff we don't like to hear when we don't believe. But somehow I went home and kept thinking about that. And after a few weeks, I started feeling that I needed to go to church. I denied that feeling for a long time, but eventually I found someone who helped me again and decided to go.
I can honestly say that this was the moment of change in my life. I won't say my life is perfect, but all those bad things I felt are GONE. Yes, I do get sad, sometimes I don't want to do anything, but not feeling the same as before. I just can't explain. I feel like a normal person now. I get sad, but in a controlled way. Most of the time I keep thinking positive, and that's something I've never been able to do in my life (and I'm 27). As I said, my life isn't perfect, I'm unemployed, I'm facing hard problems with a girl I like, among other things, but I never feel like giving up or that these things are useless. That I am useless. God definetely changed my life.
Don't worry, I'm here only to tell what happened to me. And I hope you guys find God too. Even if you don't believe today (as I was a few months ago), you may change your mind.
Unless like me you are the kind of person who will then use said list as a reason to hate yourself (look at how worthless I am, I didn't get anything/enough from the list done today).
So if someone doesn't have any goals what is the point of living? I really don't have any goals to think of.
Super right. Let's get drunk and gab all emotional-like.