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[Altazor]

what happens when it hatches

you become the Mother of Dragons™

 

[Parahan]

what happens when it hatches

 

[Wandering Robot]

This thread is almost as bizarre as the headline.

Everyone please keep these eggs away from me.

 

[daffy]

This thread has honestly made my day.! I was told leaving eggs and stones and shit in there was bad for you tho

 

[windz]

Why...is it called.....Goop....what..

What.

 

[StalkerUKCG]

"Fans say regular use increases chi, orgasms, vaginal muscle tone, hormonal balance, and feminine energy in general,"

If people believe any of these being increased by holding a Jade Egg in the Vagoo then I'd rather they didn't reproduce honestly

 

[akira28]

Why...is it called.....Goop....what..

What.

how do you like your jade vaginal eggs?

I didn't know women stuffed their vaginas full of rocks though. But it makes sense.

 

[sixteen-bit]

Bruh

 

[Kthulhu]

is it true that fertilized cadbury eggs hatch into peeps?

i didnt want this to be top of page wah

No. They become kinder eggs.

 

[fireworkfan]

this is the type of shit that drives the anit-vax people, they see an article on facebook with some random celeb saying this crazy new stuff works and to just completely ignore the last 50 years of medical research. Good on the docs to finally say something about the insanity.

 

[More Fun To Compute]

My chi is all fucked up someone call an ambulance.

 

[tbm24]

this is the type of shit that drives the anit-vax people, they see an article on facebook with some random celeb saying this crazy new stuff works and to just completely ignore the last 50 years of medical research. Good on the docs to finally say something about the insanity.

I can tell you first hand that those people don't trust what doctors say anyway. My wife's ex-friend lives in Tumblr. The shit she buys into on a weekly basis drive my wife crazy to the point she cut ties. If you're a medical professional your word means nothing. If you're a self proclaimed spiritual healer or Yogi, you've seen the light and have the real answers.

 

[Kayhan]

Jade rods, duh.

Dat feel when your wife asks where her vagina sticks went but you just had Chinese food.

 

[Kayhan]

what happens when it hatches

 

[7DollarHagane]

Anything that claims to cleanse or claims the presence of "toxins" is immediately turned to the garbage bin of my mind.

 

[NastyBook]

Marvel, just recast Pepper already. This dummy's done.

 

[andthebeatgoeson]

Not supposed to swallow them dude

 

[The Boat]

 

[Kayhan]

Now I want a Jade Empire sequel.

 

[FallingEdge]

That's all well and good but how do I go about detoxing my penis?

You'd have to have sex first so you should be fine.

 

[Dirca]

The eggs are $55 or $66.

Someone is making baaaaaaaannnkkkkkkk

PT Barnum was right. "There's a sucker born every second"

 

[Helensmith]

I felt kinda bad for sniggering at the FAQ part that says it's okay if an egg falls out when you stand up

 

[Volimar]

PT Barnum was right. "There's a sucker born every second"

minute*

Also, it was (probably) said by some other guy about Barnum and his customers, not by Barnum himself.

Themoreyouknow.gif

 

[Hero_of_the_Day]

She's a health menace and a charlatan.

I was going to say fucking idiot. But, yours works too.

 

[Grinchy]

Any time someone says "remove toxins" you can just safely ignore their opinions and advice for the rest of your life.

 

[Marvel]

 

[sazzy]

These people are so out of touch with reality and the rest of the world and their lives are so full of empty shit that they have to shove stones up their orifices to make them feel good about themselves.

 

[Messofanego]

This thread has honestly made my day.! I was told leaving eggs and stones and shit in there was bad for you tho

Don't knock it until you've tried it.

 

[Killer Queen]

Who the hell calls a Vagina a Yoni?

Rain Florence
Honestly a lot of people
It's new to me too though

 

[L Thammy]

How many jade eggs do I have to put in my asshole until I have enough chi to blow away Majin Buu? (don't have vagina, have to make do)

 

[Figboy79]

Jade rods, duh.

...


I think my penis just curled up inside of my body. It's not coming back out. Thanks, internet.

 

[tuxfool]

...


I think my penis just curled up inside of my body. It's not coming back out. Thanks, internet.

Sounding like you just need to open your mind.

 

[Dryk]

 

[TAJ]

The physics of this image bother me.

Her character in that movie is morbidly obese, but Jack Black's character has been made unable to see that.

 

[Omadahl]

At least she isn't on to my ass penny scheme. That's right! By now, you've all handled at least a dozen of my ass pennies.

 

[Kayhan]

What happens if you put it in the butt?

 

[FyreWulff]

What happens if you put it in the butt?

ain't no party like a jade butt party because the jade rod just perforated your colon and now you're in the hospital

 

[Trojita]

http://goop.com/ask-jean-do-i-need-to-detox-my-shower/

I just can't.....

Then I saw the price of the showerhead they were trying to sell.

 

[The Albatross]

Man how do people fall for this shit. Good on Doc for calling her out and spitting some facts.

My wife falls for goddam oil pulling garbage as well as everything else.. I don't think she's fall for this but who knows.

 

[Chille]

I'd like to see her give a demonstration

 

[TurnipFritters]

Isn't jade supposed to be pretty cold to the touch? I remember that being the solution to chapter in a Clue Jr. book I read twenty years ago.

 

[Beer Monkey]

First of all, yeah, you better keep that pussy in shape for the Emperor! (?)

Gwyneth Paltrow thinks Donald Trump's win is 'exciting' because 'everything is kind of up in the air'

“It’s such an exciting time to be an American because we are at this amazing inflection point and everything is kind of up in the air,” she said adding it is “such an amazing time for entrepreneurship. People are clearly tired of the status quo and […] it’s sort of like someone threw it all in the air and we’re going to see how it all lands."

Bottom line: She's a privileged idiot with rocks up her twat.

 

[MattKeil]

Right here. Why would this ever be taken seriously?

The pet supply store here has an entire section for homeopathic shit. People are stupid.

 

[Trojita]

First of all, yeah, you better keep that pussy in shape for the Emperor! (?)

Gwyneth Paltrow thinks Donald Trump's win is 'exciting' because 'everything is kind of up in the air'

“It’s such an exciting time to be an American because we are at this amazing inflection point and everything is kind of up in the air,” she said adding it is “such an amazing time for entrepreneurship. People are clearly tired of the status quo and […] it’s sort of like someone threw it all in the air and we’re going to see how it all lands."

Bottom line: She's a privileged idiot with rocks up her twat.

Man, fuck Pepper Potts.

 

[The Abominable Snowman]

I love my yoni egg exercise (eggsercise?) class. Maybe it doesn't REALLY do anything beneficial but my nani feels like it worked out while I achieve something very very close to orgasm without the sexual passion, if that makes any sense. Amazing thing this is. IDC if it is pseudo-science, it makes you feel good. It's no different from when you get a massage from a 'hot babe'.

 

[Trojita]

I love my yoni egg exercise (eggsercise?) class. Maybe it doesn't REALLY do anything beneficial but my nani feels like it worked out while I achieve something very very close to orgasm without the sexual passion, if that makes any sense. Amazing thing this is. IDC if it is pseudo-science, it makes you feel good. It's no different from when you get a massage from a 'hot babe'.

 

[The Abominable Snowman]

Nani is short for Punani/punanny, but I guess "my whaaat" works too.

 

[QuantumSquid]

"Look, I can pretend to play guitar!"

 

[andythinkpad]

I am watching some Yoni egg video on pornhub it's pretty hot.

 

[Atraveller]

It's Gwyneth "Trump's win is exciting" Paltrow.