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FakeGAF Book 4: A Game of Thirst

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I should buy Dragon Age.

I will bring myself sexual pleasure later, while thinking about this with great respect is my new catchphrase.

It's so bizarre I'm wondering just what scene it's used in.

Thinking on it, it totally seems like something The Iron Bull would say. Especially given how the Qunari view sex.
 

Risgroo

Member
The Resident Evil 4 steam page has the best tag. #truth
cELwCKH.png
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
Resident Evil's loot management and tank controls are the worst thing to happen to the franchise.

Fuck them right in the ass. Fucking cave dwelling immobilism in the name of tradition.
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
I played the RE6 demo and that was I needed. I couldn't even finish that piece of garbage. Was it representative of the full game? Because it soured me SO BAD I basically dropped the controller at some point and stopped caring about the game right then and there.
 
I forgot who it was but there is/was a person on GAF who would talk about how reviewers and players just didn't know how to play the game, and if we just knew we could slide into cover we would start enjoying it.
 
Because that is the only way Capcom will ever acknowledge the true roots of their lesser franchise:

Q7LZvz5.jpg


To this day, I cannot believe what happened to Alone in the Dark. I piss on Atari's grave.

Tank controls suck though. It's why I never bothered completing RE1. And also the main reason why I won't finish God Hand.
 

Kater

Banned
Didn't RE5 also have Tank controls?

I only played the first 30 minutes at a friends home in coop. Was really confusing.

Then we played L4D and had a pretty good evening from that point on. I really don't like tank controls and only liked the older games up to the third one because of the setting (some big city) and the horrifying enemies (Licker, Nemesis).
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
It had tank controls, but also a dynamic camera that messed up to hell and back with the player until you got a hand of it. Then it was all gravy.

The actual king of GREAT GAMES WITH SHITASS BROKEN CONTROLS THAT WILL DRIVE YOU MAD remains unbothered, tho.

Gunvalkyrie was an amazingly fun game that nearly nobody enjoyed because its controls were so broken you needed a second brain and a third hand to start grasping the basics. What the fuck, Sega™.
 
if you can't beat RE games with tank controls I don't know what to tell you kid.

I beat fucking RE1 with knife only, with that control scheme. and I'm terrible at video games.

I'm only willing to put up with so much from video games, be it awful story, mechanics, or controls. I've always liked the settings of the RE games, but the controls are so frustrating to me that I just stopped bothering.
 

Kater

Banned
It had tank controls, but also a dynamic camera that messed up to hell and back with the player until you got a hand of it. Then it was all gravy.
Maybe I give it another try someday. First I have to wait until they remove GFWL though.

Until then, there are other horror games I want to try out first. Like Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corners of the Earth and Alien: Isolation.
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corners of the Earth
Best Lovecraft game since the glorious Prisoner of Ice. Absolutely amazing. It was a real labour of love, and for all the shit it got about its many bugs (IIRC one of the developers beasted out and kept patching the game after the studio went bankrupt) it wasn't nearly as bad as critically lauded games such as anything put out by Bugthesda. The Innsmouth section of the game is just... WOW.
 

zeemumu

Member
Best Lovecraft game since the glorious Prisoner of Ice. Absolutely amazing. It was a real labour of love, and for all the shit it got about it's many bugs (IIRC one of the developers beasted out and kept patching the game after the studio went bankrupt) it wasn't nearly as bad as critically lauded games such as anything put out by Bugthesda. The Innsmouth section of the game is just... WOW.

The War Z(infestation survivor stories) is my threshold for how little a company cares about the players and game in general.
 

G-Fex

Member
I'm only willing to put up with so much from video games, be it awful story, mechanics, or controls. I've always liked the settings of the RE games, but the controls are so frustrating to me that I just stopped bothering.

Alright..

You know, sometimes MGS controls irritate me.

Yasssss! Perfection all the way through.


zxA38K1.gif

I'm not wrong. Even New Game + is even more boring.

mercenaries is kinda whatever, but at the core, RE4 is boring.

It's not even remotely interesting like RE1, where you explore this huge mansion full of stuff.

Just go here, fight some giant for some reason, save a annoying ass girl, QTE's.
 

Duress

Member
I remember in RE 6, we played some Co-op. Some sub came rolling by, and my friends character yells something like LOOK OUT!, only to get nailed by the sub train. Some awareness lol
 

Turin

Banned
Dragon Age is fantastic. My only apprehension about playing it is that it's quite literally a time eater.

I just started playing it last night and just like that it was 5:40 am and I had to work in about 3 hours.

Word. Bacon, shrooms and olives are all awesome.

Good man.

Dorian's butt says you're wrong.

My zeal for violence stands in opposition.

I should probably see a shrink about that.....

RE5 is not very good. Forced coop, no more inventory Tetris, enemies with guns #groanzone.

RE6 is trash tier.

For once we agree on something.
 

Kater

Banned
Best Lovecraft game since the glorious Prisoner of Ice. Absolutely amazing. It was a real labour of love, and for all the shit it got about its many bugs (IIRC one of the developers beasted out and kept patching the game after the studio went bankrupt) it wasn't nearly as bad as critically lauded games such as anything put out by Bugthesda. The Innsmouth section of the game is just... WOW.
I saw an LP of it two years ago and after that I started reading Lovecrafts work. While he was a real asshat as a person he certainly knew how to create a really magical (yet horrifying) world that draws you in the more you continue to read about it.
And the game seemed to be a really good adaption of the whole world that the author created. And the voice acting, Those people in Innsmouth sound so creepy!

Edit; Just saw that it's 5 Euros on Steam and bought it.
The War Z(infestation survivor stories) is my threshold for how little a company cares about the players and game in general.
I was shocked to see how far they were allowed to go with their bad treatment of paying customers who complained about the game on the discussion section of the store page. They insulted them, censored them by deleting theads, lied and so on. And they did so little to improve the game. Also, they stole assets from other games like Walking Dead (TellTale) if I remember correctly.
 

zeemumu

Member
I was shocked to see how far they were allowed to go with their bad treatment of paying customers who complained about the game on the discussion section of the store page. They insulted them, censored them by deleting theads, lied and so on. And they did so little to improve the game. Also, they stole assets from other games like Walking Dead (TellTale) if I remember correctly.

It was the blatant lying that got me. I was aware that it was still in development, but they didn't even have half the stuff that they said was in the current version. The maps at the time were just large fields and forests with empty houses and army outposts, and the respawn time thing was bullshit. It was the weakest cashgrab that I've ever seen, even for microtransactions. I ended up getting my money back from Steam and buying something else.

I've been watching my friend lose her shit over a breakup for 2 weeks. It's just so interesting. I've never seen anyone go this insane before, especially over a relationship that lasted less than a year. Part of me wants to tell her to grow up and the other part wants to give her a hug and tell her that I hope that she feels better. And the type of insanity changes every day. The first one was her believing that they were going to get back together soon, then unbridled rage, then borderline suicidal sadness, then back to thinking that they were going to get back together, then the typical "I miss you" stuff, and now it's back on rage. I honestly had no idea she was this unstable. I had a crush on her in freshman year of high school and she never seemed insane back then. In fact I'm pretty sure she thought I was weird.
 

Turin

Banned
Slightly disappointed that the voice was Serkis only because I'm really hoping Cumberbatch is in it. Still holding out hope he's been cast in an against type roll.... which would actually be better tbh.

That moment when you go to stretch and hit the ceiling fan because you're oblivious to everything around you.

Tall people have problems too.

That moment when you go to stretch and you tear your left groin muscle that doesn't heal for what felt like 2 years.

Idiot problems.
 
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