Since we talking injuries. List all of yours! I'll shoot first.
Shoulders - Broke both collar bones as kid, since then I get pretty much continuous shoulder injuries of one sort or another. Usually rotator cuff, but this most recent one seems delt involved.
Wrist - Broke as a kid (did a lot of that). Now sounds like a cement mixer and locks in place from time to time. Absolutely have to use wrist wraps for everything.
Tennis Elbow - Same arm as knackered wrist. Sadly the stretches don't seem to do anything.
Left Knee - Dislocates if I twist on it. I have hypermobility which causes this sort of thing, but its particularly bad in that knee.
DVT - Right leg. This was a few years back, but it destroyed a lot of valves in my lower leg. Terrible circulation now, gets very cold when riding and prone to cramps.
Shins - I don't believe this is shin splints, but both my shins are currently hurting when I put tortion through my lower legs. Seems to be particularly bad after squatting.
Stupid broken body.
Edit - I'm forgetting one for sure.