It's selfish if you're lucid and fully aware of yourself and your surroundings. People who kill themselves often aren't.
They call depression a "chemical imbalance" because that's what it is. It isn't something you make up for yourself or something you can control. Your brain is physically fucked up. You think the wrong things. You perceive everything differently than every normal person. Are people with brain damage and mental retardation selfish for not being able to control their deficiencies?
Think about it this way. Have you ever felt scared in bed at night, like there's a shadow that's moving that's scaring you, or you think something totally silly like your nightmare you just woke up from is real? Now imagine what an outside observer thinks. "lol look at this idiot, he's fucking afraid of dark shadows on his wall. Dude, it's just a reflection of a tree!" But you're fucking terrified. You're hearing sounds and you think it might be an intruder or even something as ridiculous as thinking there's a ghost, even if just for a few seconds. A person with depression lives like this all the fucking time. It's common to read about people who think there are people or things behind corners waiting to kill them. That's why they don't get out of bed all day. When they say life is a living nightmare all day every day, they're not being hyperbolic or dramatic. Their brain is fucking up their perception of the real world, and they see and feel things that we don't. They can't help it. They need help. They are not selfish.
