GAF... Have I ruined this opportunity? (Girl advice needed)

Do the book thing. It's a bit much, but would also be one hell of a story and start if she writes back.
You're not even showing up in person, even if she doesn't like the gesture, it's pretty easy to ignore and not really threatening. It's information she volounteered, not anything you stalked up.
 
Wait OP, you knew she was on vacation and went to the lunch spot? Haha.

I think it's time to give up. Buying a corny book for someone you vaguely know on the off-chance you'll somehow be able to get a receptionist to deliver it to her without knowing her name is a bit much.

Just pretend that she was probably a serial killer and you're better off, and learn from your mistakes. Sorry OP.

Edit:
Why didnt she just ask him out


My girlfriend asked me out

My thoughts too, but many men and women feel like it's on the guy to ask the woman out. It's dumb, but people have ridiculous hang-ups about it.
 
I legit cannot believe you talked to this chick for hours and did not bother to learn her name

I am fucking shook
 
My thoughts too, but many men and women feel like it's on the guy to ask the woman out. It's dumb, but people have ridiculous hang-ups about it.

It's dumb as shit.

Not only do you have to be the one to notice hints, but you have to take a gamble on whether or not someone was just being friendly to you. And in that case, I don't blame the OP, because even if it was intentional, it would be respectful.

Any hypothetical attitude she developed is bullshit because if she thinks OP is attractive she can take the same gamble. Someone once asked me out while I was working, and I said no. Tough titties
 
I'd like to imagine that only a neogaf.com member can be as tone deaf to when a woman is obviously very interested in them.

Just yesterday(?) there was that big thread about being a creepazoid if you try to talk to someone at a Target. These youngin's getting contradictory advice.
 
It's dumb as shit.

Not only do you have to be the one to notice hints, but you have to take a gamble on whether or not someone was just being friendly to you. And in that case, I don't blame the OP, because even if it was intentional, it would be respectful.

Any hypothetical attitude she developed is bullshit because if she thinks OP is attractive she can take the same gamble. Someone once asked me out while I was working, and I said no. Tough titties

I think girls should be the ones asking all dudes out in the new culture. Bumble IRL. Cause they're the one's with more to lose if it goes south
 
I think girls should be the ones asking all dudes out. Bumble IRL. Cause they're the one's with more to lose if it goes south
See im NOT saying this.

I'm saying if she was obviously upset, why blame him? The person most interested should just act, not get upset because of some weird made up social convention.

Get shit done
 
See im NOT saying this.

I'm saying if she was obviously upset, why blame him? The person most interested should just act, not get upset because of some weird made up social convention.

Get shit done

Some women prefer to be chased. It is what it is.

No woman wants to hear 'I've never had a natural conversation' before either.
Agree; not what I meant, but I can see how it can be read that way.
 
It's too late to dwell on your first meeting OP. You really liked her. You only have one job to do now. Be brave, be bold. Life is too unpredictable to play this safe or give up. This is that moment in your life when you have to take a risk and go all in.

Please report back on your next rendezvous. We're behind you.
 
Or that person could just be inherently friendly

There are definitely people who are just really friendly and talkative in that kind of situation. I've sat next to people on planes who told me their life story and treated me like their best friend for an hour or two. It doesn't indicate romantic interest. It's just a thing that happens.

Still, I'd say it's worth a shot for the OP if he can connect with her again. Worst that happens is he gets rejected.
 
The book thing is... uh, weird. I'm not sure how I feel about this. Too bad the lunch didn't work out, OP, but live and learn I guess?

Just yesterday(?) there was that big thread about being a creepazoid if you try to talk to someone at a Target. These youngin's getting contradictory advice.
This is a complete misrepresentation of that thread, which is that it was considered creepy to hang out at Target for the specific purpose of ogling hot chicks and try to pick them up.
 
OP this woman disturbed you from your peaceful flight , wouldn't stop talking about her mundane boring shit, invaded your personal space and then had the audacity to get upset that you didn't ask her for her name, and now here you are pulling your hair out wondering what could have been

I'll tell you what could have been. Say goodbye to your days browsing dank memes and playing video games and hello to a life of being dragged to window shop, blowing money on actual expensive meals, owning your own decisions and staring at your phone the next time she travels wondering if she's flirting with some other random passenger. You two are from different worlds.

Skip the book. Go buy yourself another sandwich and go home.
 
Go for the book idea. If nothing comes of it, nothing comes of it.

You obviously had a connection. It's never not worth trying.

I do this a lot, i rarely ask people's name and i think that talking with someone whose name you don't know, and still being comfortable with them in that way, is very relaxing and creates this feeling that it's ok to be cool with strangers, you don't have to "know" people to have strong and short relationships with them, it's more about enjoying the conversation than building a relationship that needs to have long term reliability.

Same. I do this more often than not, actually.
 
OP this woman disturbed you from your peaceful flight , wouldn't stop talking about her mundane boring shit, invaded your personal space and then had the audacity to get upset that you didn't ask her for her name, and now here you are pulling your hair out wondering what could have been

I'll tell you what could have been. Say goodbye to your days browsing dank memes and playing video games and hello to a life of being dragged to window shop, blowing money on actual expensive meals, owning your own decisions and staring at your phone the next time she travels wondering if she's flirting with some other random passenger. You two are from different worlds.

Skip the book. Go buy yourself another sandwich and go home.

You sound like an absolute catch.
 
After we land, we walk together to the baggage claim and continue talking until her bags pop out. I kinda wanted to ask her if I could see her again while I'm in town but felt like maybe it would be inappropriate as I don't want her to feel obligated if she was just being nice to a dude on the plane.

Dat shybrain! Why would she feel obligated?

I would have done the same
 
It's dumb as shit.

Not only do you have to be the one to notice hints, but you have to take a gamble on whether or not someone was just being friendly to you. And in that case, I don't blame the OP, because even if it was intentional, it would be respectful.

Any hypothetical attitude she developed is bullshit because if she thinks OP is attractive she can take the same gamble. Someone once asked me out while I was working, and I said no. Tough titties

Yup, agreed. If I was a single lass, I know I'd be on the active prowl if I was interested in someone. I can understand if the girl was shy/awkward too, but then she has no right to get pissy about OP doing the same (assuming she was actually pissy). I had crippling social anxiety in high school and never made a move on my huge crush. Years later he told me I should have haha. I wasn't pissed at him; I was pissed at myself.

Just yesterday(?) there was that big thread about being a creepazoid if you try to talk to someone at a Target. These youngin's getting contradictory advice.

Yeah, cuz that's the only thing the thread was about 9_9 But nah, let's just drag that locked thread's bullshit into here, shall we? /s
 
OP this woman disturbed you from your peaceful flight , wouldn't stop talking about her mundane boring shit, invaded your personal space and then had the audacity to get upset that you didn't ask her for her name, and now here you are pulling your hair out wondering what could have been

I'll tell you what could have been. Say goodbye to your days browsing dank memes and playing video games and hello to a life of being dragged to window shop, blowing money on actual expensive meals, owning your own decisions and staring at your phone the next time she travels wondering if she's flirting with some other random passenger. You two are from different worlds.

Skip the book. Go buy yourself another sandwich and go home.

+1

Don't do it OP. You've got us, you don't need anything else
 
You didn't even get her name? lmao, that's the first thing you ask when talking to any stranger, let alone a cute girl. Your friend was right that girls don't usually initiate physical contact like that without reason, especially on the arm (pat on the shoulder could be seen more as friendly than flirting).

It's also kind of her loss for not asking you out, so you both were a bit dumb haha!
 
What's done is done. The window is passed, and any attempt to pursue it are a bad idea. You should have just asked for her number. A lot of modern dating advice makes it more complicated than it is, with rules about how and when to ask, but just say "Hey, we should meet up some time while we're both in town," and either "Here's my number," or "What's your number?"

Period. That's it. If you're not used to it because that kind of situation (brief connection with a stranger), then put yourself out there enough in situations where it could happen, with the intent of actually following through.

If she really didn't even ask the OP's name, and then got huffy about it, then she's as dense as he is, and there's basically no way it would have worked out.
 
If she really didn't even ask the OP's name, and then got huffy about it, then she's as dense as he is, and there's basically no way it would have worked out.
This is what gets me. She got upset about that, but never introduced herself at all? I mean, it's not a huge deal if she puts herself out there if she's feeling it. If she had introduced herself to OP and he just changed the subject, then I'd understand being a little put off. But then we wouldn't be enjoying this thread in the first place.

Just weird to me. She could've said, "Oh, my name is [blank] by the way!" or something. Unless I'm missing a part of this.
 
1. Don't be too harsh on yourself. We've all done it.
2. Don't be too soft on yourself. Learn from your mistakes.
3. Use the info provided to find her and ask her out!

It's only creepy if it doesn't work.

Eh, not asked for the name of a girl who talked to me for hours?

That said, sure, go for it, "what do you have to lose" etc.
 
This is what gets me. She got upset about that, but never introduced herself at all? I mean, it's not a huge deal if she puts herself out there if she's feeling it. If she had introduced herself to OP and he just changed the subject, then I'd understand being a little put off. But then we wouldn't be enjoying this thread in the first place.

Just weird to me. She could've said, "Oh, my name is [blank] by the way!" or something. Unless I'm missing a part of this.

People can really be that dense when they come up with rules like "Guy must be the one to do X!", where X is any of...

- First introduction (here, get the name)
- First to give/get number.
- First text/call
- First ask out
- First kiss

etc.

She was probably a complete fundamentalist on out-dated dating rules. Yes, it is still totally a thing, and some people really lean into the rules because it absolves them of responsibility and initiative.
 
DON'T APOLOGIZE.

I think something like "I'm an idiot. You're wonderful, I'd really like to see you again, and I was a fool for not asking your name on the plane. Call me if you'd like to go to dinner some time. Joe xx" would be okay. A little self deprecating, paying her compliments and leaving the ball entirely in her court.

Yes, she told me where she works exactly. Where she usually eats as she recommended it to me. She even told me where she gets cookies and where she got her tats done. It's all within walking distance of her work which is literally staring my in the face as I'm talking to my boss outside the hotel we are at.

Did you go through with the book thing in the end? If not, can you try the cafe on Monday again? I need this to be a happy ending dude. I'm rooting for you on this.
 
Just yesterday(?) there was that big thread about being a creepazoid if you try to talk to someone at a Target. These youngin's getting contradictory advice.
Haha, way to soften that Target thread. It was about the express intent of going to the store only to ogle and chat girls up. Even if OP was joking (which he clarified 402 posts later when the thread was coming to a close). Chatting to someone while you're shopping is fine, but that being your only intention was what made people think of OP being a creep.
 
Greatest decision I've ever made tbh ❤️

Before or after you found out that you're both gaffers?

OP, just play camper and try to observe that place 24/7. She will eat there one day. But don't waste your money on actually eating + waiting there. Lol.
 
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