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[NandoGip]

This gesture is super, super romantic movie cute. Real life cute though? I'm not so sure. As a woman, unless I truly felt there was a mutual personality click and physical attraction, I would think this is a bit desperate and possibly creepy. I mean, it's her JOB. Not always the most appropriate place for these kinds of things and I'd be annoyed if it was done at mine.

Either way, I do hope it works out for you though. Life's too short, it's worth a shot. Just end it at the book if you hear nothing else. That HAS to be the end of this or then you truly are a total creeper.

On the flip side, I did something like this before.

I left a sticky note on a womans car who I had a conversation with as I was cleaning my car at the apartment complex we lived at. She texted me, and we dated for a while.

Just do it. If she doesn't call/text back, move on with your life.

 

[Gravy Boat]

They talked for hours. Why Not give it a chance?
I actually think her Workplace is not that far away from his hotel. The conference is 2 hours away.

I can't think of any of the women ive ever met and dated that would be impressed by someone turning up to their work place when she's not there and lying to her colleagues about a book with a note inside.

If OP wants to try that then whatever, obviously a happy ending would be great. I just think it's such an elaborate plan to try and meet up with someone you really don't know. It just comes off as incredibly desperate to me.

 

[TheBaldEmperor]

Good luck, OP! Pulling for you!

 

[BackLogJoe]

It's obvious the OP likes her a lot if he's willing to wait for her in a restaurant and eat a struggle sandwich. Btw how much did you pay for it?

As people have said before, you have nothing to lose. Give it a shot.

It was 11.5x. lol. I left a 5 dollar tip. Our conference is about labor and union rights so I wanted to tip well.

 

[hollomat]

definitely go for it, and just say you're sorry you didn't ask to meet up because you're a little bit shy, if she's a bitch about it then move on.

Yup, a girl who doesn't like some guy she's known for a few hours turning up out of the blue and stalking her is a bitch. /s

Don't do it OP. You blew it, let it go. It's not romantic to show up and wait for her, it's extremely creepy.

 

[Daft_Cat]

It'll be great if he goes to the workplace and when he hands them a book about bank robbers with a note in it they hit the silent alarm

Yeah, OP.

I'd wrap the book or something if I were you. Also protects you from the note potentially falling out.

 

[Rookhelm]

This gesture is super, super romantic movie cute. Real life cute though? I'm not so sure. As a woman, unless I truly felt there was a mutual personality click and physical attraction, I would think this is a bit desperate and possibly creepy. I mean, it's her JOB. Not always the most appropriate place for these kinds of things and I'd be annoyed if it was done at mine.

Either way, I do hope it works out for you though. Life's too short, it's worth a shot. Just end it at the book if you hear nothing else. That HAS to be the end of this or then you truly are a total creeper.

Keep in mind he didn't stalk her facebook or something to find her work. She told him...so she was comfortable enough to give a completely stranger that info. Him showing up isn't entirely out of nowhere

 

[Ristifer]

Damn. My internet went out at work for an hour and a half, so I was hoping there'd be some massively romantic outcome by the time it went back up. Well, don't give up.

 

[Beardz]

OP I know you know you don't have game and this is not the way of having some. Your only real chance was asking her in the airport, but you didn't, from that point on anything you do to try to see her again is creepy.

You actually said this:

After we land, we walk together to the baggage claim and continue talking until her bags pop out. I kinda wanted to ask her if I could see her again while I'm in town but felt like maybe it would be inappropriate as I don't want her to feel obligated if she was just being nice to a dude on the plane.

You felt creepy doing it the "right way"... but then you went to the restaurant trying to find her! That's even more creepy, but now you are trying to buy a book with a note and shit! Dude, really?!

Just hold your L, learn from it and move on.

 

[Twilight Gap]

 

[Erv]

OP I know you know you don't have game and this is not the way of having some. Your only real chance was asking her in the airport, but you didn't, from that point on anything you do to try to see her again is creepy.

You actually said this:



You felt creepy doing it the "right way"... but then you went to the restaurant trying to find her! That's even more creepy, but now you are trying to buy a book with a note and shit! Dude, really?!

Just hold your L, learn from it and move on.

Oh shut the hell up and let him do what he wants

 

[Not]

definitely go for it, and just say you're sorry you didn't ask to meet up because you're a little bit shy, if she's a bitch about it then move on.

Oh piss off

A woman is never a bitch because she rejects a man. It's her decision, dummy.

 

[SeanR1221]

Oh shut the hell up and let him do what he wants

Nah I agree. The book with the note is over the top weird.

The opportunity was at the airport. That's gone now.

 

[Erv]

Oh piss off

A woman is never a bitch because she rejects a man. It's her decision, dummy.

I think by bitch he meant rude.

 

[rataven]

Keep in mind he didn't stalk her facebook or something to find her work. She told him...so she was comfortable enough to give a completely stranger that info. Him showing up isn't entirely out of nowhere

I get that, but I've told many people where I work; it's a general topic of conversation. But what it isn't, is an open invitation to show up there and hand over gifts to the receptionist. I feel like this should be obvious.

I'm not saying it's the most egregious thing he could do, but it is borderline.

 

[Redders]

I have to go back to my conference. I had an hour for lunch. I have a plan, though. She started off at her current payroll gig as a bank teller. I asked her if she ever had anyone demand money and we talked about how current bank robberies were never planned and you end up getting caught a block away.

So I'm going to go the the bookstore here, buy a book on famous bank robbers and leave a note inside and take it to her work. She's on vacation this week so I won't run into her and make it awkward. I'll tell the receptionist she left the book on the plane. I'll put a note inside apologizing and I'll leave my name and number. It will be up to her then.

Am I missing something here? If this girl is on vacation this week why would she be at the lunch place she goes to when she's at work?

 

[Not]

I think by bitch he meant rude.

I get that it's a common word for some people, but IMO calling a woman a bitch in any setting should carry some weight.

Spoiler

Like it does in hiphop

 

[TimeEffect]

Be romantic

Find her and show her this thread

 

[FallingEdge]

creepy af

hold the L and move on, learn from your mistake

 

[Unbounded]

Fuck it, go for it OP.

Worst that happens is she rejects ya.

 

[Admiral Woofington]

Ignore everybody telling you to go for it.

The way it works for movies is you chase the girl as she's going into the airport. Not leaving it.

Therefore you're screwed

 

[boxter432]

Am I missing something here? If this girl is on vacation this week why would she be at the lunch place she goes to when she's at work?

yeah the logistics in general are confusing to me.

he was on a flight home from AC, and yet is 2 hours away from home at a conference I guess?
He thought she would be at her normal workday lunch spot but she's on vacation?

 

[Ristifer]

Yeah, if it didn't happen at the airport or the restaurant as a "random" encounter, then I'd say it's time to move on.

 

[PlayALLtheGames]

How the fuck is it you go through that much conversation without asking her name? Did she not ask yours either? Don't tell me she asked you but you didn't ask her back?

Anyway, you were right to assume that she was just being friendly in the way people are friendly on flights. At least for a bit. But given the amount of information she divulged you should have started to lean to the "might be interested" side and the arm touching should confirmed it. As soon as that happened you should have asked for her info.

Anyway, we've all been there at some point.

Hope you see her again.

Maybe get into the habit of asking girls their name when you've spoken for a bit.

 

[CloudyTuba]

Am I missing something here? If this girl is on vacation this week why would she be at the lunch place she goes to when she's at work?

 

[FreeMufasa]

Nah, it's done, move on.

If you ain't the type of guy who can't ask for a name/number with all those signs. You definitely shouldn't be the type rolling up to people's job.

Learn a lesson and be braver on the next.

 

[BackLogJoe]

How the fuck is it you go through that much conversation without asking her name? Did she not ask yours either? Don't tell me she asked you but you didn't ask her back?

Anyway, you were right to assume that she was just being friendly in the way people are friendly on flights. At least for a bit. But given the amount of information she divulged you should have started to lean to the "might be interested" side and the arm touching should confirmed it. As soon as that happened you should have asked for her info.

Anyway, we've all been there at some point.

Hope you see her again.

Maybe get into the habit of asking girls their name when you've spoken for a bit.

I don't know. Our personalities just clicked and we just started running our mouths. It just felt natural. That's why I'm bummed. But whatever. I fucked up.

 

[rugioh]

I don't know. Our personalities just clicked and we just started running our mouths. It just felt natural. That's why I'm bummed. But whatever. I fucked up.

Don't beat yourself up too much, you'll have more opportunities to come in the future. If the restaurant didn't work out then you may just need to take the L and move on

 

[Faiz]

Am I too late to hop on the no-book train?

The lunch spot was an easy yes. Of course you would go to a place a local recommended to you. That wouldn't be weird at all to run into her there.

Showing up at her office though? Eeeeeeh. Nah, time to let it go. You missed an opportunity, tried to make the most of it. Don't go to her office. Like someone else said, it's movie-cute but probably not real life cute.

 

[Akuun]

Eh, the book thing is worth a shot. Yes, it's a bit much, but if there is genuine attraction on both sides then it might be okay in this case.

I hope it works, but if it's doesn't, then just move on.

 

[hollomat]

I don't know. Our personalities just clicked and we just started running our mouths. It just felt natural. That's why I'm bummed. But whatever. I fucked up.

The important thing is to learn from the experience and recognize the signals next time someone you're talking to is interested in you.

I definitely wouldn't recommend the book thing though. By the time she gets back from vacation and sees that, emotions will have cooled.

 

[BeautifulMemory]

Make the most out of your life OP!

 

[Ark]

Am I missing something here? If this girl is on vacation this week why would she be at the lunch place she goes to when she's at work?

Oh god, you're literally the first one to pick up on this. Haha, my god that's unfortunate.

Sorry OP, sounds like you blew it, if you knew her name at least you could Facebook her, but eh. Learn from it and move on.

 

[4 is a cutie]

I don't know. Our personalities just clicked and we just started running our mouths. It just felt natural. That's why I'm bummed. But whatever. I fucked up.

She didn't want your name but she wanted you to want hers

Like seriously don't be down on yourself like that. You stumbled but its not like you were a coward like she was

 

[Rookhelm]

Am I missing something here? If this girl is on vacation this week why would she be at the lunch place she goes to when she's at work?

I feel really dumb now...this is a great point

 

[cwmartin]

How are you going to tell the receptionist who the book is for if you don't know her name?

 

[mikeGFG]

You goofed. Hard.

 

[Takuan]

The book thing's a fuckin' home run. I know it in my heart of hearts.

 

[Redders]

Oh god, you're literally the first one to pick up on this. Haha, my god that's unfortunate.

Sorry OP, sounds like you blew it, if you knew her name at least you could Facebook her, but eh. Learn from it and move on.

I feel really dumb now...this is a great point

I had to re read it a couple of times as I wasn't sure myself seeing as no one else had said anything

 

[Alienous]

Ultimately you have to do whatever you'll regret least, OP. If you do decide to go with the book idea try to come across as the anti-stalker: "I really enjoyed talking to you, and I knew I'd regret if I didn't take this one last chance* to learn your name. (Phone number) - guy from the plane". But, like, do 20 drafts of that until it's the least creepy it can be. And, like, maybe write it into the book so that it doesn't fall out and the receptionist doesn't laugh at you.

* This is important. You need to make it clear that you will attempt no further communication.

How are you going to tell the receptionist who the book is for if you don't know her name?

I was just thinking this. "She said she's on vacation now" could be sufficient.

 

[_Ryo_]

I get that, but I've told many people where I work; it's a general topic of conversation. But what it isn't, is an open invitation to show up there and hand over gifts to the receptionist. I feel like this should be obvious.

I'm not saying it's the most egregious thing he could do, but it is borderline.

I generally agree with this, with the exception that if she told him when her shift ends. It is normal to tell strangers about your work place as small talk. It isnt exactly a common thing to tell a stranger where you work, what time you get there and what time you leave though. Its mostly about what you do, how long youve been working there, if you like it there, like your boss, etc.

So it could be that she might want to run into him when she gets off work IF she mentioned when she leaves. If she did not mention her schedule at all it is a horrible idea to show up and would definitely be creepy imho.

 

[Neverforget]

Go see her but don't be creepy about it. Admit that you were too much of a coward to ask her for a date.

Ask her if she is interested to grab a bite or coffee and tell her she is free to accept or not and you will accept her decision fully.

Chances are she is interested enough to be friends from what you have told us, if you are lucky it may be more. However, don't go there full of hope and do lower your expectations just in case.

 

[IamDodongo]

I really feel for ya, op

It'll be great if he goes to the workplace and when he hands them a book about bank robbers with a note in it they hit the silent alarm

That would be amazing

 

[JaseMath]

GO TO HER LUNCH SPOT

 

[Ark]

He did. She wasn't there.

She's on vacation.

 

[Takuan]

Go see her but don't be creepy about it. Admit that you were too much of a coward to ask her for a date.

Fuck that. Focus on how naturally the conversation flowed and the fact this hadn't happened to you ever threw you off.

No woman is going to respect the words "I wanted to, but I was scared".

 

[John Kowalski]

How the fuck is it you go through that much conversation without asking her name? Did she not ask yours either? Don't tell me she asked you but you didn't ask her back?

I do this a lot, i rarely ask people's name and i think that talking with someone whose name you don't know, and still being comfortable with them in that way, is very relaxing and creates this feeling that it's ok to be cool with strangers, you don't have to "know" people to have strong and short relationships with them, it's more about enjoying the conversation than building a relationship that needs to have long term reliability.

 

[Gravy Boat]

Fuck that. Focus on how naturally the conversation flowed and the fact this hadn't happened to you ever threw you off.

No woman is going to respect the words "I wanted to, but I was scared".

No woman wants to hear 'I've never had a natural conversation' before either.

 

[DongBeetle]

So you creep out a girl in a place you have no connection to? I would just do it

 

[Matrix XII]

Man, what a thread. Totally emotionally invested in this. Don't beat yourself up too much OP. A lot of people have had situations happen to them like this, even if they don't want to admit.

I think you're doing a great job and shows courage to show up at her lunch spot like that. You're book idea is cute and it may work, but even if it doesn't that's ok. Honestly she could have given you her name and/or number too. My wife actually put in a little more work at the beginning and got my number and we are both pretty shy. It can happen any way and maybe there will be a happy ending to this story.

Wishing you the best of luck OP!