Apparently, for a city widely claimed to be the “new New York”, Berlin has to work off quite a backlog of attributes that make a city big.
What kind of idiot claims Berlin is the new NYC?
Like, you know, tall buildings.
Reason we have none: Forbidden by Berlin law.
True reason: Germans can't think big. Big buildings are so anti-Bausparvertrag, it hurts. Also, Germans like to claim that they are super understated (HALT! SCHWEINEHUND! BIER HAXEN!) and big buildings are for obnoxious egotistical Americans. To them, all American cities look the same - and that sure as shit won't happen to their precious German cities. Berlin is too beautiful to be sullied by some jerk off gigantism.
We have those. From 8-10 a.m. and from 17-19 p.m. Otherwise it's dead. Especially the inner city. You go half a block from Unter den Linden? DEAD. Why? I would guess it's the same reason we don't have street vendors. Oh, funny story: An ice cream store in Prenzlauerberg got shut down a couple weeks ago by our precious Ordnungsamt (YES, THIS THING EXISTS. Welcome to Germany), because the line was too long. New Yorkers, try to wrap your head around that. Imagine this: some mid-50s women with fashionable short hair, from a "department of order" close down Grimaldi's because their fucking lines are too long. Only in Germany, bro. Only in Germany.
Well, if you ask Germans we have too much Turks anyway. Nobody wants more of them. When I moved here in 2006, I was told by a "true" Berliner (Berliner is a Donut, get over yourself) that in Kreuzberg, some signs are written in both German and Turkish. IMAGINE THAT! TURKISH IN GERMANY! Na, wo sind wir denn hier? To answer and quote our foreign minister: "Es ist Deutschland, hier!".
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. STOP. PLEASE!
A wide variety of scenes and cultures.
What's important to know is that Germans have a special skill to effectively kill off and ban foreign culture from even appearing on German streets. This skill is called "Integrationsdebatte". The number 1 priority for each and every immigrant is to become integrated, to become assimilated, to effectively become germanized. Immigrants must be homogenized, otherwise they are unacceptable. You can see this easily by observing Germans talking to immigrants who don't speak the language. Germans immediately start talking to them as if they suddenly became retards. A sentence that will live in infamy: "Nix Banana?" That exact question is what my mom was confronted with by a fellow German (I say fellow because at that point my mother was a German citizen) when he tried to offer her a Banana. SPOILER: The correct sentence would have been: "Möchten Sie keine Banane?"
24/7 grocery shopping. Hell, 24/7 anything, for that matter.
Reason why this isn't happening: German law, apparently it's a holy day. So much for segregation of state and church, huh?
Real reason why this isn't happening: Because German shopkeepers (and their lobby) hate it when immigrants of other beliefs come to this country and make money on a day where Germans are stuck indoors, being holy (read: lazy). That's the real fucking reason. It's because "it's unfair", because people who are ready to work would be their biggest fucking nightmare. "Non-christians" would kill it in sales on Sundays and the small minded German piece of shit lobby won't have that. Because they believe it's their damn right to be lazy for one day a weak. And nobody should ever make profits from that. Especially the non-christians shouldn't. This year they finally started cracking down on "Spätis" (basically "Delis" in NYC) in Berlin, effectively fining immigrant shop keepers out of sunday dealings.
Somehow this new New York didn’t get old New York’s memo about it being “the city that never sleeps,” and not “the city that sleeps in until around noon, skips the shower, and wastes the day in a nearby cafe passing smug judgement on normal people.”
Amen.