Phat Michael
Banned
Yeah fair enough. Guess that's what works for me. Even seeing people at the gym with fit bodies motivates me, they're not flaunting anything but I always think "I'd like that physique" if I can work out hard enough.
Hot Mom Defends Herself Against Facebook Haters, gives a non-apology
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Yeah fair enough. Guess that's what works for me. Even seeing people at the gym with fit bodies motivates me, they're not flaunting anything but I always think "I'd like that physique" if I can work out hard enough.
You're at the gym in the first place, which means you're in a receptive mindset. I think for people who are genuine with their desires, i.e. "I want to look better and I will work for it", they'll get the message. But for the people who only have the former in their minds and not the latter, the "What's your excuse?" is definitely rubbing their faces in it.
The gym I started out at had a before/after poster behind the receptiondesk. The caption read: "60 minutes a day, 3 days per week, no special diet, 4 months". The before was a fat slob, the after was a fit, but not overly toned, guy. The guy was the owner of said gym. They even offered his trainingregiment as a special offer for first-time subscribers.
I think that poster does a better job at convincing people they can get in shape than these so-called motivational posters that scream at you "WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE?", it shows upfront what it takes to reach that image.
A
A More Normal Bird
Unconfirmed Member
That the meme frames "not being in shape as something that needs to be excused" is your interpretation. I see it as a response to the prevalence of excuses that are trotted out by people when explaining why they won't take the steps of engaging in diet or exercise in the first place. Obviously if you're not making excuses to begin with it doesn't apply, but many people do so. Whether it is an effective challenger of those excuses or whether it turns people away is up for debate; judging by this thread I'd lean towards the latter.
As for Opiate's examples, they were silly. The basic point that people have different contexts influencing their achievements is valid, but the specifics were not comparable. If you think the barriers to entry and amount of time, effort and even natural predisposition required to obtain a degree from a prestigious university are comparable to those required to engage in a basic physical training program you're either ill-informed or being dishonest. But Opiate's examples fail at an even earlier hurdle: he is comparing outcomes to processes. These memes (by and large) don't contain pictures of Olympic medallists or models or bodybuilders and then ask people why they haven't reached a similar level of achievement, they show people with a large disadvantage making an effort. The (purported) 102 year old on the rowing machine isn't going to win Mr. Olympia, but he is applauded for not letting excuses dissuade him. The woman in the OP isn't saying "I've had kids too so why don't you look as good as me?", she's saying "Despite having children I make time to exercise." Her appearance is simply a visual heuristic for confirming this. It may be an attention grabbing and obnoxious one, but that's all it is.
If you take a look at the fitness thread on this very forum (and many others like it), you'll find that most people don't care if you're fat or weak or skinny or slow, they care if you have a positive attitude and are willing to learn. When people say things like "I don't have 20 hours a week to spend lifting weights" it demonstrates that they are unwilling to put even the slightest effort into researching the topic and thus are "making excuses". It certainly doesn't help that vast swathes of the fitness industry peddle FUD aimed at confusing customers, distorting their body images and hampering their efforts to improve their health in order to prime them for continued consumption, but lashing out any time you're told that you've been sold a lie is a good way to ensure that you'll keep making excuses and that any effort you do make will likely be in vain.
dragonelite
Member
Pretty much how i see it.
Even if it means you fail 4 times too loose most of the fat.
Just keep on trying.
This is my fifth attempt and i found something that seems to work so im keep on doing it. First was a change in timescale instead of expecting results in 3~4 months i am planning for 18 months 35kg too loose 2kg/month, instead of 1kg/week. Its less intense with the diet and people actually start to comment on my weight lost progress. It feels so good when others are seeing your hard work and dedication start paying off.
Also even if there was a genetic disposition for 90% of all heavier people - it's still just a genetic disposition. Unless it's an actual disease, it just means that those people would have a harder time, but it's not impossible - not in the slighest.
And it really is calories intake. If people eat less (calories that is), people will lose weight sooner or later. If calories intake wouldn't matter at all, such people would be able to eat nothing at all and wouldn't die because of that. But they would. (like already said - diseases excluded including people, that are on specific medicine - like for example higher dose of prednisolone for a long time).
I just look back at when I wasn't even able to eat enough liquid food. Had calorie intake of around 900-1200 kcals per day and I got extremly skinny.
On the other hand, if I would have eaten say 10 or more liquid food packages per day (which would have been around 3000 kcal), I would have gotten fat.
PhantomZone
Member
I am on her side!
MidgarBlowedUp
Member
What if there were this hidden agenda by the American food industry that injected the food we eat with a super secret "make you fat" compound? And what if that same ingredient was highly addictive and changed body chemistry so that you eventually became diabetic and craved even more of the stuff? And what if the health industry claimed this additive was needed by the body and they told everyone that it was good for you, that you just couldn't live without it? And what if the cheapest foods available were also full of the ingredient? And they even advertised foods that were filled with this compound too.
But that would just be too weird and ridiculous right?
But that would just be too weird and ridiculous right?
ThankYouDaletech
Banned
That's like, CrossFit level obnoxious.
Son ov Timett
Banned
Without shame, the large just get larger. Ridicule, mock, and point your finger in hysterics. You're doing them a great service every time you do.
This.
The image is fine. Nothing wrong with it. Good for her. But the message is kind of bitchy and condescending. Some people don't have the time, money or support system. It would have been different if she said "Don't give up. You can do it too"
Plus her responses really just dug her deeper. Saying nothing would have been better.
why should she say nothing after getting attacked by people with insecurities and thin skin? Its not like she email blasted the image or forced it on everyone's facebook feed. People found and decided to attack her.
This whole <insert word>-shaming is beyond ridiculous now.
D
Deleted member 325805
Unconfirmed Member
Because making fun of a fat person never makes them comfort eat.
This isn't fat-shaming in the least. Its actually a woman trying to do the opposite - provide some 'C'mon get up and do it!' attitude for people that are having trouble with the motivation.
If you're offended by this, I'm guessing you're just upset at yourself more than anything.
If you're offended by this, I'm guessing you're just upset at yourself more than anything.
Blackace
if you see me in a fight with a bear, don't help me fool, help the bear!
from her facebook page?
Monochromaticx
Member
On the positive side, because of people trying to flame her she is now even more famous and got to spread her message even further.
Although one might wonder how it's affecting her businesses.
dapperbandit
Banned
that's exactly how I'd put it.
Zoe
Member
It's really disingenuous to act as if this was just a personal photo.
andthebeatgoeson
Junior Member
These _____-shaming claims lose power in these settings. Seems like the wrong time to jump down someone's throat over a picture not aimed at a certain individual and not overly offensive. And I'm annoyed at the resultant article about every thing that gets the 'internet' in a rage. I wonder if people in the media are depressed. Now they spend a significant amount of time talking about people being upset on digital platforms, in a race to stay relevant.
Phat Michael
Banned
Dude I'll join you. Wanna lose around 20 to 25kg in around 2 years. Just joined a new gym after a long time off. Starts on Saturday but damn the dieting is the hardest stuff. Working full time as well and being exhausted after work. Still, no excuses, it can be done
Zoe
Member
It's on her business page. Which is promoting her fitness persona.
It was on the page of her personal training business page...which AFAIK she herself runs.
I fail to see the issue.
Blackace
if you see me in a fight with a bear, don't help me fool, help the bear!
Zoe
Member
Studies have shown most people don't respond well to aggressive and insulting phrasing, especially women who just gave birth. She doesn't appear to realize that.
And by posting on Facebook, she is effectively posting it everywhere. That's how advertising works on Facebook.
Boom Boom Pow
Banned
wait there are ppl who are angry at her about this? why again?
good work on behalf of the mom, but at least as far as the picture in the OP goes, it comes off as arrogant and guilt shaming. Its very, pull yourself up by your bootstraps, so to speak.
I'm sure if it was a picture of a guy with lots of money saying how he came from a poor neighborhood and family, with the same header, many in here would be saying something different.
at the same time, screw the haters. At the very least be honest with yourself
I'm sure if it was a picture of a guy with lots of money saying how he came from a poor neighborhood and family, with the same header, many in here would be saying something different.
at the same time, screw the haters. At the very least be honest with yourself
Everyone wants to create a new -phobic or -shaming to make themselves feel better, and to carve out some new niche for themselves in society. Sorry, that shit just don't fly for everything. Fat-shaming isn't a thing. People should be pressured to get in shape. It's healthier. I was 30+lbs overweight for 6+ years. Everyday I looked in the mirror and called myself fat. I had no problem with it, of course. Those were the most delicious days of my life. I enjoyed eating any and everything. However, I never let myself forget that I was indeed fat. There's no reason to become comfortable with being unhealthy.
I lost the 30lbs and now I can look in the mirror each day and tell myself I'm fit. I don't get to eat the life buffet anymore, but I still eat good. And I'm healthy now. Healthy is good. Being fat is very much something to be ashamed of. Let's not make up excuses for it. Unless you got a glandular problem, or a debilitating injury, you got no excuse. PEACE.
I lost the 30lbs and now I can look in the mirror each day and tell myself I'm fit. I don't get to eat the life buffet anymore, but I still eat good. And I'm healthy now. Healthy is good. Being fat is very much something to be ashamed of. Let's not make up excuses for it. Unless you got a glandular problem, or a debilitating injury, you got no excuse. PEACE.
What are you talking about? No way she wanted people who haven't heard of her business yet to see the photo. That's not how advertising works.
No. Jesus Christ guys, we went over this over and over again and Opiate pointed out that these agressive methods are less efficient for the general population, why would you chose the inefficient way? As someone who has given math lessons to the most inept and "lazy" people you will ever see I can tell you that the positive reinforcement always worked WAY better and encouraged the students and when I was less patient and harsher they stagnated.
Zoe
Member
Online businesses (in this case a blog and store) work by word of mouth. It's the profile picture of the page. Every time one of her fans interacts with that page, it will show up on their friends' feeds with that picture.
Are you talking about high fructose corn syrup?
Zoe
Member
I thought my sarcasm was pretty obvious
Sorry, too many people sincerely acting like that
Jest Chillin
Member
When is the phrase "What's your excuse?" ever used in a positive manner elsewhere in life? Seems obvious that such phrasing will result in pissing off more people than it inspires.
Also, people don't start business related pages on social networks to preach to the converted. Her intent in creating the page was to try to get her message out to people. She put out a message with a negative connotation and received negative responses back. Of course people shouldn't attack her personally but people do tend to lash out when they feel attacked.
Also, people don't start business related pages on social networks to preach to the converted. Her intent in creating the page was to try to get her message out to people. She put out a message with a negative connotation and received negative responses back. Of course people shouldn't attack her personally but people do tend to lash out when they feel attacked.
onken
Member
I used to work with this huge woman and she would often complain about how her body was naturally heavy and even though she ate healthily she just couldn't lose weight. I'd have felt sorry for her if I didn't watch her cramming down coke and snacks nine-to-five. To this day I don't know if she was completely self-deluded or just a bare-faced liar. Anyway, she's the reason I have a hard time believing anyone who claims "medical reasons" for obesity.
Count Dookkake
Member
A shame you somehow missed my rebuttal to your picture examples.
The obstacle?
Count Dookkake
Member
Yes. Perhaps I missed his response to that from someone else making the same point, but as of now, my uncaffeinated brain can not see it.
Randy Monk
Member
I'm not so sure on that. Only really vain people would think like that.
It might be the other way round to be honest. Those who are inclined to free up time to exercise and stay in shape may be more likely to juxtapose themselves with those who they aspire to be like rather than those who lack what they have.
WeAreStarStuff
Member
Damn she's fine.
Regardless, its the intent that matters.
The way I see it - motivational 'phrases' and campaigns are 'take it or leave it' affairs. If you like it, use it. If you don't like it, move on. There's absolutely nothing to gain by being vocally upset by it.
I taught math for years and I tutor now. This isn't the same thing. It's easy to find rewards for learning. It's not easy to find rewards for the daily torture of true weight loss. I don't read Opiates posts, much like I'm sure he doesn't read mine. We're like polar opposites. I don't subscribe to the feel good everything view of life. Some things can only come from within, and weight loss is one of those things I feel is motivated by a negative self- image. I'm no personal trainer, and maybe opiate is, but that's how I feel about that. When your body is aching, you're hungry for weeks or months, and you're asked to get up and do it again days after day, you tell me what carrot you're gonna dangle in front of that person to keep them going.
I called myself fat each day because I was. That was my motivation. I was not going to let myself think for a second that it was ok to be fat. If I did. I'd never get the motivation to stay on that treadmill and endure those 1200 kcal days. I lack discipline and I'm smart enough I can rationalize anything. Why give myself an easy out? PEACE.
As someone who's taken up running again to lose weight, think sometimes you have to confront yourself with the unflattering truth to get off your ass and do something.
The reality here is that I think the people complaining see hot mom as a threat to their security. She appears to be everything they aren't but wish they were, and she's flaunting it (to them).
Anyone who has the discipline to maintain a workout schedule with 3 kids has my respect, not condemnation.
The reality here is that I think the people complaining see hot mom as a threat to their security. She appears to be everything they aren't but wish they were, and she's flaunting it (to them).
Anyone who has the discipline to maintain a workout schedule with 3 kids has my respect, not condemnation.
There you have it though. What Opiate was talking about, and what I am talking about, is extrinsic motivation. What you are talking about is intrinsic motivation. Intrinsic motivation doesn't come from people telling you you are a lazy dude who just makes excuses. You are intrinsically motivated because you are dissatisfied with your body and decided to do something against it. If somebody tries to motivate you, which is extrinsic of course, telling him/her he/she is "fat and lazy" and "just making excuses" doesn't do shit. Well for a few it does but in general taking a positive approach will be more effective.
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