It's funny you say that because I prefer to leave the elevator first especially if a woman is there with me. The reason is because one time I did the polite thing and let the woman go first. She turned in the same direction as my apartment so I was following behind her. She kept looking over her shoulder and then stopped and said "why are you following me". I told her I wasn't following her and my apartment was right here. I put in my key and went in. So yea being a big Hispanic guy means I don't let women go first.
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Is Chivalry Sexist? (The modern version)
- Thread starter BlitzEngineer
- Start date
It's funny you say that because I prefer to leave the elevator first especially if a woman is there with me. The reason is because one time I did the polite thing and let the woman go first. She turned in the same direction as my apartment so I was following behind her. She kept looking over her shoulder and then stopped and said "why are you following me". I told her I wasn't following her and my apartment was right here. I put in my key and went in. So yea being a big Hispanic guy means I don't let women go first.
It probably didn't feel great being profiled like that.
John Rabbit
Banned
He should've just given her the umbrella if he was legitimately that concerned.
Also you should hold doors and offer umbrellas to anyone in need, not just women.
Also you should hold doors and offer umbrellas to anyone in need, not just women.
Earthbound64
Banned
So let's see here...
1) OP was driving under the influence of alcohol
2) His friend, also under the influence of alcohol, gets into a woman's personal space, starts following her, and ignores requests to leave her alone
This isn't about "chivalry"
This is about a couple of drunk guys, one of whom was also being creepy.
1) OP was driving under the influence of alcohol
2) His friend, also under the influence of alcohol, gets into a woman's personal space, starts following her, and ignores requests to leave her alone
This isn't about "chivalry"
This is about a couple of drunk guys, one of whom was also being creepy.
blu
Wants the largest console games publisher to avoid Nintendo's platforms.
Admitting physical differences between the sexes is not sexism - I'd normally offer my help to a woman (any age and physical appearance) if I saw she were overloaded with, say, grocery bags. That means walking her to wherever she feels comfortable - car, block, etc. I'd also never insist if she refused.
I've also offered help to guys in similar situations, but trigger conditions there rise a bit -- let's say their issue would need to be way heavier than shopping bags. Men do have higher physical limits, after all.
Running after a stranger, whether male or female, with an umbrella in the night is something I'd not do, though.
I've also offered help to guys in similar situations, but trigger conditions there rise a bit -- let's say their issue would need to be way heavier than shopping bags. Men do have higher physical limits, after all.
Running after a stranger, whether male or female, with an umbrella in the night is something I'd not do, though.
She died?!?! Man, that sucks how did you find out?
He's joking.
Nope. Just trying to go home and she made me feel like I was a potential rapist.
hey_it's_that_dog
benevolent sexism
This isn't chivalry, this is obliviously creepy behaviour. If it was chivalry, though, it could be classified as sexism. Benevolent sexism, specifically, as opposed to hostile sexism.
Golden_Pigeon
Banned
Messofanego
Banned
Yup.
hey_it's_that_dog
benevolent sexism
Yeah I'd love to get rid of this tag since the only thing it can accomplish is to make people assume something about me that is false. But hey that's what I get for merely using the term in a thread where a mod was having a bad day."hey_it's_that_dog
benevolent sexism"
I wouldn't call it sexism per-say, more like outdated romanticism that sounded like a good idea after a few beers.
Your right, your friend was being creepy unintentionally. Please continue to educate him why it was creepy when he is sober. Sounds like he is misguided, not a dick.
Also, chivalry just needs to be updated to cover both sexes. Just be polite to everyone.
Your right, your friend was being creepy unintentionally. Please continue to educate him why it was creepy when he is sober. Sounds like he is misguided, not a dick.
Also, chivalry just needs to be updated to cover both sexes. Just be polite to everyone.
Autoignition
Member
You just answered your own question, champ. The difference between polite and sexist is if you wouldn't do the same thing for men. So, to run down your list...
Why would it be weird? This is something about men and masculinity that I've never understood. My girlfriends and I all offer each other extra layers if we see someone's cold. Why do men think it's weird to do the same?
I never even understood what that phrase even meant, so, yes. That girls are more fair-minded? That's just not true; men and women both have members who are judgmental, catty, close-minded, etc. Just like they both have members that are even-keeled, fair, and largely unbiased. That women are "fairer" in the sense that they're beautiful? Have you never met a beautiful man? If the answer is no, have you considered examining why you think this way?
Dating is different, especially if you're not bisexual. There's no "would you treat a man this way" question attached, because presumably you wouldn't be oriented to date a man in the first place. People treat romantic partners differently from strangers or even friends just due to the nature of the relationship; it's different.
Being a redneck doesn't absolve him from being sexist. I have no idea what angle this defense is even coming from.
Golden_Pigeon
Banned
Haha I don't think anybody will assume this without context, chill, everybody know it's full of very specific joke. I don't understand 99% of those.
Your friend sounds like a "nice guy" who is just being polite so that women pay attention to him. That isn't chivalrous it is creepy and he needs help.
"is it sexist" is an unnecessary question.
"would it be completely bizarre if you did that for a dude in the same situation?"
means that you're probably stepping over a line.
I dunno what chivalry meant 50 years ago, but you don't just run up on random people with an umbrella without a word in 2017.
"would it be completely bizarre if you did that for a dude in the same situation?"
means that you're probably stepping over a line.
I dunno what chivalry meant 50 years ago, but you don't just run up on random people with an umbrella without a word in 2017.
superdeluxe
Member
I hold the door open for women, and I'm not expecting sex either. I've always gotten a thank you
Always-honest
Banned
That's not chivalry, that's creepy.
Bananajama
Banned
Ask if they want help
If they say no walk away
If they say no walk away
Messofanego
Banned
How is Jeff now these days, creeping on other girls or learned his lesson?
KarneeKarnay
Member
He's creepy.
Chivalry is inherently sexist if you do it with that in mind.
Example if I offer my GF my coat because it's cold, that would be Chivalry, but I just didn't want her to be cold.
Same example, I offer my coat because it's what Chivalry would demand. That's a douchbag move.
Chivalry is inherently sexist if you do it with that in mind.
Example if I offer my GF my coat because it's cold, that would be Chivalry, but I just didn't want her to be cold.
Same example, I offer my coat because it's what Chivalry would demand. That's a douchbag move.
It's how I feel these days....