Yes sir I do.
So the show was pretty fun. I had a good seat. I wasn't able to get any decent pictures though because of the way the lighting was. I'm sure some of this stuff will be used at the Rumble or in upcoming weeks. This will be a long read so I'm gonna try my best to separate it into readable paragraphs. Here we go.
Justin Roberts did his thing getting the crowd ready and stuff.
I swore Jack Swagger was dead but nope he's alive......and he wrestled.....Brodus Clay. Since it was the first match the crowd was pretty damn pumped and Brodus got a nice pop. Did his dancing horseshit and then they proceeded to have an alright match. The crowd was really booing the shit out of Swagger whenever he would leave the ring. He was getting some good heat. Brodus ended up winning the match and Jack Swagger will go back to wherever the fuck he's been......Superstars?...being Fandangoo? Who gives a shit.
CM Punk came out next to chorus of boos. He talked about how he can't wrestle tonight because his knee is still shitty from surgery. And he has a note from his doctor and the audience should be booing the doctor. He takes a shot at the city (Ontario) and gets some cheap heat. Getting really heavy boos during the whole segment and then he says something along the lines of welp i guess that's it, so enjoy the show folks. He was pretty funny. Before he left the ring, Zigglers music hit and he came to the ring with AJ and Big E Langston. Ziggler was wearing a surgical mask or some shit and he got on the mic complaining how he's sick and I think he made a comment about the city as well. He went on to say that neither he nor Punk were gonna compete so there's basically not gonna be a show tonight. Then EXCUSE ME! Yes Vickie comes out as a face and is actually getting cheered a bit. Makes a tag team match playas between Punk and Ziggler vs Ryback and Cena. Crowd erupts. Punk throws a tantrum like a child in the ring and it's pretty hilarious.
Tensai comes out to damn near no reaction. No one gave even the slightest shitstain about him. And his opponent................................................BO FUCKING DALLAS BABY!!!.................................................................................yep. I looked around to see if any fucks were being given anywhere.....nope....none...maybe -7. You could be a vendor handing out fucks for this match and I'm pretty sure no one in the crowd would have given either of these guys any. Well as the match went on the crowd got into it slightly at certain points for about .3 seconds. And then Lord Jobber...I mean Prince Jobber....I mean Giant Jobber....well yeah that guy......he jobbed. So yup. The end.
My man crush Antonio Cesaro appeared on the screen talking some good shit and getting some decent heat. He talks about Miz/Flair and the crowd starts to WOOO. But the best part was the end of the promo when he said he was going to be US Champion for a long x 20 time. Yeah no joke he said long probably 20 times. A lot of heat for that. I was laughing my ass off. Justin Roberts then announces that the crowd can vote for what kind of match that Miz and Cesaro will have for the title. 2 out of 3 falls or no dq. Of course the crowd is gonna go with no dq
Damian Sandow comes out to some good heat and gets on the mic. The crowd tries to "What" him but is failing at first because he isn't giving them consistent pauses. He starts giving the audience time to "What" and proceeds to do the 3 questions bit but says he'll just answer them himself since the crowd probably can't get them. And the first question was "Do you know what word in the English language I hate the most?" Crowd says "What" and he says something along the lines of very good you guys didn't even need my help. The other question was a shot at the city and the last question was about what wrestler could wrestle him and then Alex Riley ends up coming out. Riley still kind of wrestles at 100 mph. But Sandow ends up winning the match.
Cesaro and Miz are up next, and this ends up being the match of the night. I think they also got the most time. Like 15+ min I think. Cesaro comes out but not to as much heat as I hoped for. Waving the American flag and whatnot. Miz comes out to a pretty damn big pop. Starts out as a standard match with some back and forth. Eventually Cesaro goes outside the ring to look for a weapon and gets a kendo stick. Miz avoids it and ends up getting the stick and does his turnbuckle clothesline thing with the kendo stick. They were working the crowd pretty well. Crowd started to get crazy when Cesaro looked like he might pull out a table. But he didn't. Crowd boos and then "we want tables" chants start. Chairs end up in the ring but not too much is done with them. One gets put into the corner in between the turnbuckles. Eventually Miz goes crashing headfirst into it. A lot of near falls in this match. "We want tables" chants continue and Miz starts to pull out a table and the crowd gets fucking crazy. Cesaro interrupts him and throws him back into the ring. He puts the table back under the ring and gets heavily booed. Cesaro takes off the padding to a turnbuckle and a bit later in the match when Miz is against the turnbuckle, Cesaro tries a running knee lift and hits the turnbuckle since Miz moves. Cesaro is on the mat and Miz is in position for a figure four. Crowd goes nuts and starts cheering and WOOOOing and all that good shit. Cesaro gets to the ropes but it's no dq so ref is like go fuck yourself. Cesaro hits Miz with a kendo stick. Table finally comes out courtesy of Miz and he places it in one of the corners inside the ring. So the end of the match has a few reversals of them trying to put each other through the table. Miz does a reversal and is about to run Cesaro through the table but Cesaro pulls the ref in front of him and then pokes Miz in the eye and does the neutralizer for the finish. And ever since that knee lift to the turnbuckle, Cesaro has been selling his leg. I like that. After the match he's still selling it. He proceeded to exit up the ramp but came back down to give Miz another neutralizer. Miz reverses and put Cesaro through the table. I did get to see him do his uppercut during the match by the way. I don't really like how Miz takes his moves though. One thing I'd like to point out that I really liked during the match was this one spot after Cesaro knocked down Miz. After a shoulder block they usually do that run the ropes and jump over them shit and then the opponent gets up and jumps over them blah blah blah. Well when Miz jumped Cesaro just caught him and slammed him. Very impressive.
15 min intermission.....but they should've just said 25 minute since a divas match was next.
Kaitlyn and Tamina for divas title. Not much of a reaction for Tamina. Kaitlyn got a decent pop. An alright match. Some of it looked kind of sloppy. And the spear at the end looked like dogshit.
Cody Rhodes and Zack Ryder have a match next. Not much too it. Standard match. Both guys did their signature moves. Ryder wins it with his finisher. Ryder did get a big pop though and a lot of Woo Woo Woo's. Some "Cody's Mustache" chants during the match.
The main event was next and I honestly don't have too much to write about it. It was standard, run of the mill WWE tag team bullshit fuckery. Heels beat the fuck out of faces until the hot tag and then the faces win. Ziggler got pinned. This shit is already long as fuck as it is, and most of you probably won't read it, but I will point out some things. Punk gets some good heat when he came out, same with Ziggler. Ryback got a humongous pop and even I had to partake in the "feed me more" chants, such a mark. Cena got the biggest pop of the night of course. It was deafening. A funny little spot happened while Cena was running to the ring during his entrance. CM Punk tried to run by and hit him with the belt I believe, but he missed with all these theatrics involved. Crowd thought it was pretty funny. Match begins. Wrestling happens...etc..etc. "Let's go Cena! Cena Sucks!" of course. There was a moment when Ryback and Big E stared each other down and I thought it would be cool if they had a match.....and then I immediately aborted that from my thought process and my memory. Wrestling happens...etc...etc. Hot tag to Cena. 5 moves of doom and we're done. Shows over. Crowd goes home happy. Fuck you crowd. Fuck you.
tl;dr - WWE house show. Cesaro gives me a boner. So does AJ. And I can't lie that I contemplated jumping the barrier and kidnapping her tiny ass. But that big bizarro world Ryback motherfucker would've laid my ass out. I could probably take out normal Ryback though....he can't lift shit. I've seen how weak he is.
Fin.
