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WCW Thunder 5/24/00
Recap of Nitro.
TO THE BACK. Nash and Scott Steiner arrive in a Corvette.
Chris Candido vs The Artist vs Daffney WCW Cruiserweight Championship
Sunny and Paisley had in ring pre match promos. Daffney had one with Gene in the back. She's wearing a black wedding dress. Sunny and Paisley are immediately involved. Ms. Hancock strolls out again. Tenay is really shitty about Daffney being the champion and how she doesn't deserve it because she fell into a win on Nitro. Except the Nitro before she legally made the pin intentionally in a mixed tag for the title. So she actually did earn that title. Mike Tenay hates womens. Crowbar runs down the ramp and gets involved. Sunny gives money from her boobs to Stacy's boobs so she can get the clipboard. However, Sunny accidentally hit Skip with it, and Daffney fall back onto him to retain the title.
TO THE BACK. Russo is freaking out about Nash and Steiner. Eric tells him to handle it himself.
EARLIER TODAY. Norman and Ralphus are now selling lotions and shampoos. Shane offers them a hardcore title match, because he's feeling full of himself due to his big night against Terry Funk.
TO THE BACK. Kim and Liz are talking. Well, Kim is talking. Kim is getting upset that she's not a star yet.
Shane Douglas vs Ralphus/Norman Smiley WCW Hardcore Championship.
First, Shane isn't actually the hardcore champion. He cut a long Shane Douglas promo before the match. Ralphus came out dressed like an ape. Eric and Cat were in the back not happy that Shane gave them a title shot. Shane pretty much dominates Norman while Ralphus sits in the corner scratching his ass. This goes on for so long. Ralphus has the chain on his hand and hits a very familiar punch combo and a chair shot. RALPHUS IS THE CHAMPION! But then Ralphus takes off the mask and reveals himself to be TERRY FUNK! TERRY FUNK IS THE CHAMPION!
TO THE BACK. Eric freaks out and Cat repeats everything he says. He sends Cat out to the ring. Eric/David walk around with security and an old lady. Nash and Steiner head to the arena wearing snow goggles.
TO THE TAILGATE PARTY.
Recap of the Russo/David/Ric stuff.
Russo/David/Daffney/Old Lady/Security come to the ring. Brain thinks it is Miss Michigan. The old lady is Reid Flair's 6th grade teacher.
He's a hellion! He taught the whole class to make flatuating noises. FLATUATING NOISES! LOOKIN UP THE LITTLE GIRL'S DRESSES! Russo is hilarious repeating what the teacher says, but this is so dumb. David has a very special word to say. Since Ric can't wrestle at the GAB, he challenges Reid to a match. Kevin Nash comes out. Snow goggles just on his head now. He brings out Scott Steiner. Goggles in place, the head to the ring.
Security comes after them one at a time, because they are the shittiest security. Russo tries to hide behind the teacher and throws David into a jackknife. Nash chokes Russo and Steiner wants a triple threat match with Nash vs Steiner vs Jarrett for the title tonight! Russo agrees.
MOMENTS AGO. Jeff Jarrett saw this and is not happy at all.
TO THE BACK. Eric and Cat talk to Shane Douglas about losing the title to Terry Funk. Shane is on very thin ice. He needs to take out Terry Funk tonight or else.
Filthy Animals vs MIA
Sorry guys, I hate the heel Filthy Animals. Van hammer hit the shittiest cobra clutch slam I've ever seen. Truly awful. He didn't even have the hold locked in, so what happened was he kind of picked Juvi up by one arm and lightly dropped him. And then sold HIS back more than Juvi did. Shawn Stasiak came out when it was down to Rey vs Chavo/Hard Cock. This brings out Booker T in camo fatigues. He was fired on Nitro, but his music played anyway.
TO THE BACK. Eric is trying to end the squabble between Kidman and WHOREASS. Kim is still talking to Liz, who has been tuning her out. Liz shoves her out of her chair and makes a break for it. Russo is talking to Rick Steiner and Tank in the dark. Dean Douglas is looking for Terry Funk in the back. "Hey Funk, you sandbagging son of a bitch!"
Chuck Palumbo vs The Wall
Chuck is back to having Lex's music and posing. I don't know why they changed it on Nitro. The Wall is now an enemy of the New Blood for turning on Shane Douglas, who turned on him first for no reason. Makes sense. Chuck hits Wall with the Lex Flexxxer, which knocked him off the apron and through a table for the win. Wall gets up and Chuck bolts.
TO THE BACK. Eric is telling Horace to take care of business. Kim says she lost Liz. Eric tells her to find Liz.
Kidman/Horace vs Kronik
Eric cuts a pre match promo. It was about no more Hulk after the GAB and WHOREASS and Kidman getting along. This was an open challenge from Eric. He wasn't expecting anyone to come out Kronik are the real tag champions now. For 3 weeks no one has known if they were champs or not. But now, they are the champs. Probably since Buff is missing. Shane said he got suspended and he hasn't been mentioned since.
On May 9, 2000, following a Thunder taping in Springfield, Illinois, Bagwell punched and yelled racial slurs at Darrell Miller, a WCW crew member, after he and Bagwell began arguing when Miller attempted to carry equipment through a doorway in which Bagwell was standing. On May 15, 2000 Bagwell was charged with battery by the Sangamon County, Illinois State's Attorney's office. WCW responded to the incident by suspending Bagwell for thirty days and stripping him of his half of the World Tag Team Championship.
Oh. That's what happened. Bischoff gets on the apron and WHOREASS hits him, because Eric cut him off earlier or something. Kidman gets hit with the High Times. Horace stands for what feels like 10 minutes pretending to hit Eric with a chair. Then Wrath holds Kidman so Horace can him him, but Horace SWERVES him and hits Wrath with the chair instead. This was a double SWERVE, I think.
TO THE BACK. Shane Douglas finds Norman and Ralphus. He's still looking for Funk, who has apparently left the building. He punches Norman and steals Ralphus.
TO THE TAIL GATE PARTY.
Shane Douglas brings Ralphus to the ring to beat him up. I'm not sure I like this stuff with Ralphus anymore. They're clearly just using this man to make fun of him for being fat and ugly. Wall comes out and brawls with Shane. Wall chokeslams the dean through the announce table.
TO THE BACK. Gene is with the MIA and Booker T. Excuse me, GI Bro. Now can you feel that? Now can you copy that? Jeff is still pissed at Russo for booking a title match.
TO THE TAIL GATE PARTY. Fucking 3 of these? This is clearly padding for time. But it isn't even like a Nitro party. It's just a quick highlight video that is basically a commercial for motor oil.
TO THE BACK. Nash and Steiner are getting ready for the match. Kev prepares by reading the paper and having coffee. Steiner prepares by doing push ups with YAKS on his back. Kim tells two security guards to find Liz. She tells Wildcat Chris Harris to find a specific kind of lotion for her.
Shawn Stasiak vs GI Bro.
Wait. Booker is still fired. How is he already having a match? Curt Hennig got the MIA their jobs back just so he could turn on them and disappear. Who got Bro rehired? Two nights after he got fired. Book comes out in his camo gear, but takes it off. So he's just wrestling in his normal gear with some face paint that is hard to see because it is dark paint. So I guess it is working. Meat did a better gutwrench powerbomb than Jack Swagger. Booker hits the ax kick and Harlem Side kick for a two count. Book End for the win. Meat attacks with a chair after the match. Where the fuck are the MIA?
TO THE INTERVIEW. Tenay had an exclusive interview with Sting. Sting knows mind games better than everyone. "Vampiro doesn't mean anything to me. You're forgetting that I've been here for 10 years." Way to build up your opponent, STEVE. Sting gets mad when Tenay asks if Vamp is getting under his skin. "HE'S NOT GETTING UNDER MY SKIINN, MIKE!" Sting is shook! It's clear he doesn't want to take this match, but he can't turn down a challenge on live TV like that. The lights go out, we hear some heavy grunting, and then the interview set was on fire.
TO THE BACK. Gene interviews Kim. She's sick of this day. Liz attacks during this and drags Kim off with a scarf I think.
DDP comes to he ring. "You know Bischoff, I got three words for ya: You. REEAAALLLY. Suck!" DDP was shockingly corny most of the time. I really wasn't into him past early 1999. GOOD GAWD! SCUM! MONKEYS! DDP talks about Eric and Mike Awesome for a bit until Liz drags Kim to the ring. Pretty sure they passed Russo sitting at the Gorilla position next to the Red Rooster. DDP spanks Kim. We see part of the first one and then the rest are crowd shots. The ThunderVision shows Awesome in Kanyon's hospital room. Chuck stole Liz again.
TO THE BACK. Jeff, Steiner, and Nash head to the arena. DDP called security at the hospital.
Jeff Jarrett vs Kevin Nash vs Scott Steiner WCW Championship
Russo is on color with scratchy voice. Russo will now referee this match! This brings Nash out in the fastest pace he's had in his life. Which is normal speed for everyone else. Kev chases Russo out in the crowd while Jeff attacks Steiner from behind in the ring. Somehow Russo made it back around to the ramp in record time. Nash is back at the ring. Steiner now goes after Russo on the ramp. As he's going to hit Russo, Rick and Tank came out having stolen Scott's YAKS. Scott disappears to the back. Russo gets in the ring. He's about to get powerbombed, but Jeff hits Nash with the bat. Nash eventually accidental clotheslines the ref. Nash hits Jeff with the title belt. Billy Silverman counts, but Russo pulls him out of the ring. Russo hits Billy with the guitar! Russo already said he was the ref, so I don't know why any of this is necessary. Jeff hits Nash with a chair in the ring, but it only gets a two count. Mickie Jay wants to come out, but is stopped by security. So Steiner runs through them two at a time. Nash powerbombs Jeff and is your new champion! Yep. So let's see how the title picture went since the reboot
April 10: Vacated
April 16: Jeff Jarrett
April 24: DDP
April 25: David Arquette (aired on April 26)
May 7: Jeff Jarrett
May 15: Ric Flair
May 22: Vacated
May 22: Title is awarded to Jeff Jarrett because of reasons
May 23: Kevin Nash (aired on May 24)
That's, so far, 9 times the title has changes hands or been vacated in about a month and a half. And there are 2 more changes coming up.