Barrylocke
Member
It is DOWN.
Thank you <3
Our resident Mickey D's Viral Marketer has invited someone new? Nice to meet you!
It is DOWN.
Thank you <3
nah hes okay. should eat less mcdonalds though
What kind of video games have you liked this year?
Our resident Mickey D's Viral Marketer has invited someone new? Nice to meet you!
Eh, I'm not a mod but Ive seen quite a few sexual topics in OT and in here. I doubt you'll RIP in peace.Hey Gaf, I know I always seem to come on here with just problems haha
(Sorry, you guys are the only LGBT community I have easy access to)
...but I have a bit of a heavy question, that may require describing some sexual things, before I just wanted to ask if that sort of thing would be allowed without me getting a banhammer lol
A friend talks about this site and this page a lot so I've come to hang. I haven't been on a message board since Neopets probably 10 years ago so I might be rusty.
Who were you on neopets because I was basically ~e-famous~ on neopets forum boards back when I was like 12.
That was embarrassing to say.
I was mostly on Neopets role playing boards because thats what coooool kids did! I think my name was Zyth or something?
Eh, I'm not a mod but Ive seen quite a few sexual topics in OT and in here. I doubt you'll RIP in peace.
Hahaha nice, yeah I went on the role playing boards for a little bit but then there was like the secret jelly board chat and the italian FC chat. So ridiculous. I remember all this because I just talked with this girl who I've been friends with since that time.
Hmm...well alright, it's a bit of a long thing but...here it is.
If you don't want to read a long story or get bothered by gross detailed, I spoilered it. So here it goes...
There's a Brazilian comedian who's gay and got married this week, huge wedding full of celebrities and he didn't kiss his husband, they hugged. Apparently (unconfirmed) because "gays kissing could be uncomfortable to guests".
:/
Stupid country.
I'm not an expert that knows whether what you described was sexual assault. The more pressing question is actually "how do you feel about those experiences and are they affecting your current state of mind today?".
Hmm...well alright, it's a bit of a long thing but...here it is.
If you don't want to read a long story or get bothered by gross detailed, I spoilered it. So here it goes...
A few years ago, I met a friend, he said he was straight, but later admitted he was bi to me. All well and good, we became good friends, I helped him come out to his friends, good stuff.
Side effect was he fell in love with me, I didn't feel the same way, sad but still nothing unusual. I felt bad about it, cuz I was in the same position numerous times, so I was really nice about it. Even let him live in my room for almost a year when he had problems with his parents.
Problem happened during that time, a few months in. Now, as much as I cared about him as a friend, I didn't like him as anything more than that. A few months in he asked me if he could...well touch me. I was open minded, and honestly felt bad about how he fell for me, so I let him.
tbh I did not enjoy it at all, the whole thing made me very uncomfortable. This was also a me who had very little sexual experience at that point. Things escalated and he asked if he could blow me. I said no at first but he kept asking and I said yes eventually. Also didn't enjoy it, I used to think of other things while he did it to distract myself.
Things of course escalated from there and he asked if I would blow him. I said no, many times...but because I was a weak ass low confidence son of a bitch, I caved eventually. I hated it. It really, honestly made me grossed out and well...for lack of a better word repulsed. But I did it because he'd beg, and he'd get depressed if I kept saying no.
He stayed with me for a year.
After it was all over, I just thought of it as a weird time and left it aside.
...until last week when a friend described a similar situation with someone he knew and he described it as 'rape'.
Thats not even what really surprised me, what got me was that, until that point, I had literally never thought about what happened back then since. I mean even when someone asked me how many guys I'd been with it never crossed my mind, not once, like I'd sealed off the memory or something lol
I don't know, GAF, I mean I LET him do it, and I consented to what I did, it's not rape, right?
Hmm...well alright, it's a bit of a long thing but...here it is.
If you don't want to read a long story or get bothered by gross detailed, I spoilered it. So here it goes...
TW for rape
If you have to think about it so much and it bothers you so much I would say yes. You said No and he basically manipulated you into doing those things. I hope he no longer lives in your house.
The disgusting truth is I dont think you can get anything done legally about it because the USA is the worst and my own school wouldn't believe me even when I had a ton of proof so I am a realist about this stuff and a rape victim myself (going on two years in Feburary).
I guess you LET him do stuff the same way I LET my rapist take me to his house to just hang out and I LET him touch me even after I said no and his reply was laughing at me.
The thing with rape is that it is a quiet thing. Its not like in the movies where people are yelling and they get hurt. Rape is silent. Rape doesnt leave marks on your skin.
Also what you are describing as forgetting that event when people ask about it then I think you are showing signs of PTSD and so yes again this could defiantly count as rape.
"No is a complete sentence."- Amy Pohler
Hum, that's a tough one. I honestly don't know if what happened to you is rape.
On the one hand, you did give him consent - twice.
On the other hand, you did say no initially, and it seems this experience was traumatic to you. You can't handwave what happened, you were greatly affected by it.
Self-loathing aside, I think you should never cave if someone wants to do something with you you don't want. "No means no". If someone insists and try to do something with you when you didn't give consent, that is sexual assault.
People knowledgeable about rape (and law, which, depending on which country or state you live in, can vary greatly) would certainly be able to help you.
I see...well shit
Also I don't even live in the states, you can technically get charged and go to jail for being (male and) gay in my country, so definitely no chance of that. I wouldn't charge him anyway, I guess. We still talk occasionally, just not about that.
I was just wondering if it was or wasn't. Interesting, I think I'll have to think on this...
Thanks for the help, GAF
It is lots of thinking and getting help if you can (which you might not be able to where you live?). Thats why it took me a year to finally realize it wasn't just a bad date. It takes time.
The internet is a godsend for gay people in countries like mine because of such issues
The only 'official' you could probably go to down here with this kind of issue is a psychologist
The most vivid neopets memories where the chats that were like "+++****SPECIAL POWERS HIGH SCHOOL+++***!!!!" and they were always a mess. I would kill to go back to old chat logs and find some good gems! I dont think I gained any friends from Neopets whoops.
If you can find someone who is good with PTSD you should go. I am 100% all about having professionals help with brain stuff. (I mean dang thats my major and career field right there).
When you roleplayed on neopets, was it during the time that everyone just made their neopets into scene kids?
A friend talks about this site and this page a lot so I've come to hang. I haven't been on a message board since Neopets probably 10 years ago so I might be rusty.
Your gender? Female
Your sexual orientation? Heteroromantic Asexual (i think the distinction is important since lots of people tell me I'm straight and just haven't found the right guy)
Where Do You Live? Houston, Texass
How Old Are you? 23
Favorite Type of Music? I am all about instrumental right now
Profession or Career interest? Starting my Masters in Counseling in January
Favorite video game(s)? Okami
What are your hobbies (other than gaming)? talking shit
And here is my best selfie of the year so uh?
This already feels too long and weird sorry gang
What are your hobbies (other than gaming)? talking shit
There's a Brazilian comedian who's gay and got married this week, huge wedding full of celebrities and he didn't kiss his husband, they hugged. Apparently (unconfirmed) because "gays kissing could be uncomfortable to guests".
:/
Stupid country.
Just remember that regardless as to whether or not a government may call your experience a rape or assault or even nothing at all, at the end of the day this experience has clearly (from what I see) left you affected (which is why I responded to your post the way I did earlier). I mean, if it hasn't then you wouldn't have asked us about it, right? So having said that, finding your way to peace and moving forward, whatever that way is, is something that you should do. Professional help definitely is something to strongly consider.The internet is a godsend for gay people in countries like mine because of such issues
The only 'official' you could probably go to down here with this kind of issue is a psychologist
I figured of course Down being super good looking would hang out with other super good looking people~
In other news, i need a great hiking suggestion for my guy and I to go to. I'm thinking somewhere in colorado.
Will do! Trying molly on NYE for a show. First time
Is down permanently winking in actual life? I'd be so confused by whatever he'd say.
Does Down has nudies on his Facebook? Or undies at least?
That's exciting! Don't overdo it though, there's like a curve where at a certain point doing more (even though it seems like a good idea) will just make your next morning more terrible. And enjoy the bass.
Then go to after party and toke yourself into a coma because sleeping is rlly hard.
It's great but man does that make me feel down for quite a few days after every time
I know it's because of the excess release of serotonin though. Makes it easier to cope with once you know what's going on.
Yeah, my bf has tried it before and is giving me pro-tips about it.Exactly. I don't really do it much anymore, or if I do I take a very conservative dose, otherwise I'm so emotionally drained the next day.
Exactly. I don't really do it much anymore, or if I do I take a very conservative dose, otherwise I'm so emotionally drained the next day.
Yeah, my bf has tried it before and is giving me pro-tips about it.
I figured of course Down being super good looking would hang out with other super good looking people~
Yeah, my bf has tried it before and is giving me pro-tips about it.
Yeah, I used to abuse it like four years ago. Now I'm way more cautious of it, thankfully!
I figured all his friends were Iphone using Grimace enthusiasts.
How about Birdie?
McDonalds mascots.
Then ask him. Is only fair.I have never seen him without a shirt on. He has lots of pictures of me in underwear but I've only seen him in shorts once!
I think a lot of people do, or at least I did and so did a lot of my friends. I think it's because the 'entactogens' (MDMA, 2C-B, etc) are pretty much the only fun 'club drugs'. Coke sucks, and ketamine isn't any way to spend a night out (it's more of a stay at home thing).