ROH Death Before Dishonor 2003
TO THE BACK. CM Punk cuts a promo on what he considers the most important night of his career. He has a dog collar match with Raven tonight. He was pretty happy about almost killing Raven a few weeks ago. Punk talks about one night where his dad came home drunk, passed out, and puked. His dad turned blue. That's what he thought of when he was choking Raven with a chain. But he regrets saving both Raven and his father. Don't mind the dude walking around in the back. Cabana comes in with the chain and it pisses Punk off. He's sick of the tomfoolery and shenanigans. Colt then hypes himself up after Punk storms off.
This show is the one I actually remember most of. Seeing the pre show video which spoils pretty much everything on the show (why did ROH do that? Every one of these shows has a music video BEFORE the show that has pretty much every major spot during the show) all looks familiar.
All of Special K and all their YAKS come to the ring and dance and shit.
TO THE BACK. GMC informs Joe that Paul London claims he's going to have a special moment tonight. Joe don't give a fuck. It's going to be a special moment for him, not Paul. Gabe says they have news on Homicide's whereabouts. GMC says COOL and goes off to find him.
Back in the ring, Special K are still raving. Gabe and the other dude act like they have no idea what's going on. The show hasn't officially started.
TO THE BACK. GMC asks Homicide and Julius Smokes about what happened with them and Low Ki. I can't understand a fucking word Homicide says. Julius Smokes is fucking amazing. Holy shit. That fucking guy. Homicide challenges Corino to a Strong Style Match.
Again back to the ring, the show has finally started, but the rave is still going on. 15 minutes and there still hasn't been any in ring action. ROH: We Wrassle. The CSC also come out. WTF, ROH? The first 15 minutes of your biggest show of the year is a rave and outrageously gay tag team kissing fans in the front row? What is going on? The ravers beat up the gay dudes and the lights go out. Low Ki's music hits!
Low Ki vs Deranged
Over 20 minutes into this DVD before any ring action happens. Ki KOs one dude with a slap.
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Another guy laughs and he puts him in the Dragon Clutch. I guess that was a match, but not really. Deranged hits a low blow and mocks Ki. This dude actually gets some offense on Ki. Like, a lot of offense. Low Ki loses his shit after a stiff drop kick and does like 30 fucking STIFF Kawada kicks while ripping the dude's hair out and then punched him in the face for fun.
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Sorry for the choppy gif. It's too long to have a good frame rate. And that wasn't even all of it. There were still more kicks and a straight up punch in the face.
What the fuck man. Chill out. The big black dude in a suit gets in the ring and grabs Low Ki. Ki rips his balls off. He does the Ki Rush I think into a spinning Ki Crusher and Dragon Clutch for the win. He then steps on the guy's balls after the match for no reason. Low Ki is such a dick head.
TO THE BACK. Actually, footage from Japan of Chris Daniels on Koji Kanemoto's phone talking to someone. Then he counts himself down so he can turn on heel persona voice. That shit needs to end right now. So stupid. His face has not had a good 10 years.
Jimmy Rave vs Matt Stryker
I'm sure this will be very exciting. Jimmy Rave looked like he never saw a gym in his life. Stryker looks like he never saw a pair of tweezers in his life. I can't care about this. It's indierific "technical" wrestling. I guess it's not bad, but I'm not interested in that. Stryker wins with a DVD.
Carnage Crew vs Team TWA Weapons Match
Oh boy, Justin Credible, Devito, and Raven on the same show! Wait, Loc was a ref in ECW, wasn't he? ROH, bringing those new stars. Wait, Tony Mamaluke is on this show, too. And this match also has a blind guy and Hernadez. I'll just gif the botches and big spots. Sometimes both at the same time. Hernandez pinned Masada after a Border Toss through some chairs.
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Outkast Killaz vs Tony Mamaluke/John Walters
John Walters. Whatever happened to that guy? I guess wrestling didn't have room for Benoit clones after 2007. Except for Davey Richards. But guess what? Davey Richards is fucking awful. I don't remember the Killaz. Walters was the first guy I remember doing the Lung Blower. What a curse. He does a camel clutch and chin lock thing that was more convoluted than any SAT move. Mamaluke/Walters win with a knee bar/shoulder lock double submission thing. It looked stupid as fuck. Dunn and Marcos came out and made fun of the Killaz for losing. Xavier made his return and beat them up. Sorry, Gabe, Xavier isn't a bad ass. He then cut a promo, but I didn't listen to it.
Tom Carter vs Doug Williams Pure Wrestling Challenge
I'm not sure what that means. Submissions only, maybe? This should be decent. The reverence for which Reckless is talked about is so weird. He was just a local indy guy who never made it big, but they talk about him like he's one of the most amazing wrestlers to ever life. So, a flaky indy guy is one of the best ever? Isn't that most indy guys? Lots of wacky Euro stuff like this:
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Doug hit the Chaos Theory, but couldn't hold the pin as his shoulder had been worked on for most of the match. Carter won with a cradle.
TO THE BACK. Alison Danger tried to convince Carter to join The Prophecy.
BJ Whitmer vs Homicide vs Colt Cabana vs Dan Maff Number One Contender Trophy Match
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Colt really hadn't settled into really being Colt Cabana yet. He's very, very try hard. Maff and Homicide start out, but Maff gives the hard tag to BJ. They go for a few minutes and Colt and Maff get tagged in. Dangerous backdrop driver to Colt. But then this guy misses a diving headbutt. Maff gives another hard tag to BJ. Homicide comes in and kills himself on a tope.
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Lot of back kicks. Not back round front kicks, but kicks to the back. Maff also does a dive and totally misses BJ and Homicide and lands in the front row.
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Cabana then does an Asai moonsault. BJ and Maff get in the ring and have a chop battle. Then some head drops. KANYON CUTTER! BANG! Bunch of finisher reversals. Maff hits the Burning Hammer on Colt.
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Explodah! BJ pins Colt with a top rope wrist clutch explodaaaahhhh. Seems like over kill. There were a lot of movez.
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TO THE BACK. Daniels is on the phone again getting updates on the show. He didn't know Xavier was coming back, but then he counts down to promo voice and laughs that Xavier came back, just like they planned. GMC talks to Low Ki.
Back in the ring, we see Special K putting the Backseat Boys through a table. They finally get their rave started.
SAT/Backseat Boys vs Special K Tag Team Scramble Match
Was the rave stuff supposed to come after the match? Oh well. I'll just gif the stupid shit. Mikey Whipwreck is in the match. So that is now 5 ECW guys I think? Mikey wins with a Whippersnapper on Trent after Trent was accidentally hit by one of the SAT. Weird. This was really short and didn't even have a single dive. BSB lay out the SAT after the match.
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Krazy K vs Joey Matthews vs Jeff Hardy
The ROH fans were NOT excited to see Jeff Hardy. Coming out in his Willow The Wisp mask and slipping on the ropes during his entrance probably didn't help.
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Yet they were super pumped for Matt Hardy? He also wrestles most of the match with a Neo trench coat on. This dude was wrestling HBK, Taker, and The Rock just a few weeks/months prior. Now he's in New Jersey wrestling for 1200 people. He also got to have an on screen relationship with Trish. Jeff pinned Krazy K with his leg drop on the legs thingy move. Fans didn't give a FUCK except for a few teenage girls. The rest were flipping him off, chanting fuck you Hardy, and getting in his face. However, there was a standing ovation behind the curtain.
A recap of the Punk/Raven angle is shown.
CM Punk vs Raven Dog Collar Match
Before the match, Punk does some extensive heeling on the crowd.
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Danny Doring happened to be walking in the crowd. Poor guy. There are 10 ECW alumni booked on the show, including ring announcers and referees, but that dude is just in the crowd drinking a beer hoping to get noticed. I'm expecting this to be bloody and super over booked. Naturally, Punk is busted open within 2 minutes. They brawl around the ring for a while, until heading into the ring where Raven went through a table in the corner. Punk does a knee drop with the chain wrapped around it. The only dog collar match I've ever liked was Piper/Valentine at Starcade. They're always just boring brawls. Most of this takes place out of the ring and or in the crowd. Raven makes the mistake of taunting at the top of bleachers, which meant he was going to get yanked down. By his neck. LITA JUST JERKED EDGE OFF...THE LADDER!
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An awkward Shining Wizard leads to promo time with Punk. For no reason, Punk stands on the top rope (after slipping twice) even though Raven is almost completely across the ring. He gets pulled off, but went back to shit talking anyway. Raven makes his comeback of punches and shitty clotheslines, ending with the chair drop toe hold. The ref gets hit with a chair. Raven hit the Evenflow, but didn't matter. Cabana comes in and hits a DDT on a chair to Raven! Danny Doring hits the ring and attacks Colt. Punk ties Raven to the ropes. He's almost crucified. Didn't Raven learn his lesson from that in ECW? Punk has beers and pours them on Raven. Would that make you fall off the wagon? Just having it on you? TOMMY DREAMER comes out of the crowd and hits Punk with a chair. Tommy Dreamer is FAT! He's got a FAATT AASSS! DDT to Punk! Dreamer ties Punk to the ropes. I like that he carries athletic tape with him just in case. Dreamer and Raven hug. Raven totally should have DDT'd him right there. Raven then pours beer all over Punk, Dreamer does a Sandman impression, and they hug some more.
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Let's see, Raven, Dreamer, Justin Credible, Mikey Whipwreck, Danny Doring, Tony Devito, HC Loc, Tony Mamaluke, Stephen DeAngelo. ROH were all about that new talent!
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TO THE BACK. Paul London talks about his history in ROH. This was his last night as he was going off to WWE land. Every match is one of his favorite matches in his life.
A highlight package of the history between AJ/Red and the Briscoes airs. This will be their third match.
AJ Styles/Amazing Red vs Briscoe Brothers ROH Tag Team Championships
AJ was also the NWA Champion during this time. AJ and Jay fight to the floor right away. A lot of fast action that kind of goes nowhere. It slows down and the bros start working over Red's leg. Red makes the hot tag and AJ comes in. Sweet pumphandle gutbuster, but Mark hits a t-bone to end the run. Dumb tower of doomish spot led to a double pin that didn't matter. Jay Driller!
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Doomsday Device on AJ, but he kicked out. They redo the Shining Wizard spot from their last match. AJ pins Jay with a normal pancake since he couldn't get Jay's arms locked up. This was definitely not as cool or wacky as their last match I watched. Kind of felt like it was a "AJ can't get injured" kind of thing.
TO THE BACK. Jim Cornette cuts a promo from OVW.
A history of some of Paul London's biggest matches are shown. Then the last few Joe title defenses.
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Paul London vs Samoa Joe ROH World Championship
Paul comes out and hugs a lot of fans all around ringside. Paul got a lot of streamers. Paul gets the best of Joe for the opening minutes, but Joe ends that shit with an elbow to the face. STJoe. Paul keeps trying to fight back, but Joe stops him over and over. Paul gets bodyslammed into to the ring post.
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Joe's running kick on the floor looks bad. Both times he completely whiffed and just kicked the railing signs really hard. But then he does a missile dropkick.
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Paul SWERVES Joe by faking hitting his head in the corner, only to hit his DDT and the SSP.
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Joe kicked out. Lot of near falls on roll ups, but Joe eventually locks on the choke for the win. After the match, the roster emptied the locker room to give Paul a send off. He started to talk and the whole roster took a knee. This definitely should have ended with someone coming out to heel on him.
TO THE BACK. Raven talks about his feud with Punk and how Punk has defeated him 4 times in a row, but he got his revenge tonight. He wants a cage match. "He's an arrogant, piece of shit." Sums Punk up pretty well. Is it weird that Raven reminds me of James Franco? The Carnage Crew talk about their fat ass wives and how they ditched a family picnic to go to a titty bar. This shit is gross. Who talks like that? They randomly bring up their wives and nagging kids in a wrestling promo and that "hey remember the time?" kind of talking that no one actually talks like. Loc is a terrible promo guy. Justin Credible is like a foot taller than both of these guys. JC looked like he had been doing meth or some shit. Dude had to have had some kind of pill addiction during this time.
Daniels gives his thoughts on the show from Japan. Fienstein tries to get a promo with Punk. Colt tells him to buzz off. Punk shoves him when RF says something about the cage match.
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This was over 4 hours of show, but the first 25 minutes were all backstage promos and a rave, plus a number of highlight packages and promos during the show. The best thing ROH ever did was convince their fan base they weren't sports entertainment. This show is full on sports entertainment the whole way through.