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Newborn Baby-GAF: Sleepless Nights Deluxe HD Remix

CrankyJay

Banned
Hey fellow new parents. I have a heavy story to tell. I haven't read the whole thread so maybe people have posted worse but for us this was terrible.

Three weeks ago today my daughter was born and it was the scariest moment of our lives. My wife was in labor for 23 hours before she started pushing and then 4 more hours later it was over.

She was completely blue and lifeless. They immediately got her to the portable NICU they had brought into the room and 4-5 people starting working on her. Her Apgar score was a 2 because she at least had a pulse but it was racing over 200 which is way high. It probably took about 30 seconds before she made her first sounds (best thing I've ever heard) and in those 30 seconds I couldn't help but start considering the possibility that we'd lose her and what that would mean for our future. I don't know exactly how bad it was, maybe the staff deals with this stuff a lot and it's not that serious to them, but to us it was awful. What your baby looks like dead is a haunting image to possess.

Scary times...

Ok happy stuff. She's perfectly fine now and is a pretty good baby. When she's awake she is "quiet alert" most of the time so even on late nights when she won't sleep you can watch TV or play games and just be chill with her. We watched the League of Legends World Championships together which was really cool.

Some advice I have: get earplugs. When you have to change a diaper or whatever late at night and you're barely awake, your baby's screaming can be head splitting and painful. Pop in some earplugs and you can focus on stopping the crying instead of getting frustrated at it.


Whoa. I'm glad your baby is okay, and congratulations!
 
This sounds like us. My wife was the same as yours. We planned to use a birthing center but her water had been broke for 24 hours so they wouldn't take us anymore. My wife had white coat syndrome to where her blood pressure would spike from anxiety so they thought she had preeclampsia. One nurse didn't believe in white coat hypertension and insited that we do a test. Did some painful tests that came up negative and the doctors still wanted to give her drugs. She declined and the doctors said that she made the right choice. We were confused by that because they seemed pretty strong about giving drugs.

The cervix wasn't opened as much as the doctors would have liked so they offered epidural which makes contractions stronger. The down side to that is that often women can't take it and need pitocin to calm it down. That leads to the baby's heart rate dropping and then it's c-section time. My wife really wanted it naturally but she was afraid of the doctors using the 24 hour water breakage as a reason to do a c-section so she agreed with the epidural and that was pretty painful to watch but she hung in there and never allowed them to give her the pitocin.

Oh and we had two doulas who were amazing. I highly recommend doulas for anyone having a baby.

There was nothing wrong with my wife, that's the thing. No high blood pressure, no anxiety, no need for tests, etc. Heck, labor was only 17 hours. We just had a nurse who wanted to load her up on pitosin and not actually have to do her job. We stuck to our guns, everything went well and no one else at the hospital ever gave us any kind of flack.

Talking to other people who work there, they had nothing good to say about this specific nurse. We just had a bad luck of the draw.
 

mrkgoo

Member
So here's a question for any parent with a toddler; how do you handle changing diapers? For us it seems to be harder and harder to get our girl to change her diaper. She's almost 18 months now and getting her to lay down for a change is almost impossible now. She just wants to get up and do things rather than lay there. Even if we get her down, not long after she'll try to roll, struggle, twist, whatever to get away and man is she a strong kid. It used to be easy to distract her with a toy or something, but not so much anymore. She actively tells us "no" or shakes her head when we tell her it's time to change her diaper. It's starting to become a two person job where one tries to hold her in place while the other changes and even that's difficult sometimes. So what have you guys done to try and keep your toddler in place or at bay during a diaper change?
from what I understand, reverse psychology and defiance are part of a child's psychological development. Anyway that doesn't help your situation, I just thought it was interesting. A couPle of my friends have tough toddlers. How old is she? I was just wondering if you ever tried those pull-up diapers for toddlers. I think they're fOr walking age though.

We decided to go natural but one of the key things we learned early on was not to get your heart set on any specific thing during child birth. You need to be flexible in case things happen that don't go your way. Thankfully we had that in mind because we had to move away from going natural. Our girl was a week late so my wife was induced. After about 10 to 12 hours and it being late at night, she just felt discomfort. Like extreme constipation and pressure down bellow that she had trouble getting any type of rest and was miserable. She wasn't even in pain or anything yet at that point so it was just a constant uncomfortable feeling without any sign of relief. Eventually late at night, I think it was like 2 or 3 in the morning, she caved and went with getting an epidural and after that she was able to sleep and get some rest and was glad she did. We had no plan to do it going into this.

So my advice is, if you really have your heart set on it, talk it through and make sure you understand how important it is to your wife about staying firm on this or what the point where you actually cave is. Even if you try to stand firm, be prepared in your mind that you may just end up going with the drugs based on how things play out during labor. There's nothing wrong with going that route either as I believe most births go that route and babies turn out fine. Whatever it is, make sure it's your wife's decision though because she's the one going through it. You have some right to give input and feelings on it, but ultimately it's on her.

this. My wife tried to go natural, but after a long labour and then upping oxytocin therapy, it was strongly suggested we go epidural. We had discussed that we would try natural but would listen to the pro advice if it came to that. After lots of pushing with no success, we ended up with more epidural, in the operating theatre and using forceps.

Just know that the most important thing is to get mum and baby out the other end happy and healthy.

Brian griffin: crazystory, glad it eventually worked out. During our labour we were advised not to let pushing go beyond an hour by an obstetrician. We went a little longer, but our ob decided to intervene.
 

CrankyJay

Banned
What's the deal with natural birth? My wife sounds pretty gung ho about the drugs.

We went to a birthing class with a doula who gave great advice and kind of rolled her eyes at people with binders full of birthing plans because they're usually thrown out the window because it usually never goes according to plan. Different strokes I guess.
 
What's the deal with natural birth? My wife sounds pretty gung ho about the drugs.

We went to a birthing class with a doula who gave great advice and kind of rolled her eyes at people with binders full of birthing plans because they're usually thrown out the window. Different strokes I guess.

Natural births are preferred for many different reasons. Some just want the full experience. Others don't want to put the baby in distress or do anything that could lead to a C-section instead. Getting the drugs pretty much makes you numb below so you can't feel anything which also means you're stuck in bed and can't move around too. There are certainly some drawbacks to how the birth will go if you take the drugs. Also keep in mind, it takes some time for the drugs to kick in so sometimes there's just no time to induce it.

from what I understand, reverse psychology and defiance are part of a child's psychological development. Anyway that doesn't help your situation, I just thought it was interesting. A couPle of my friends have tough toddlers. How old is she? I was just wondering if you ever tried those pull-up diapers for toddlers. I think they're fOr walking age though.

She's 18 months so definitely walking. We've tried using those, and we use those for the night time since they can hold more, but even then I don't like them very much because she squirms a bit and it's hard to get her feet in to pull them up. My wife is much better at the pull ups than I am. If you do it wrong, you can stretch it so that the diaper comes undone by opening up at the seam that you normally would pull on to take it off. Plus that's sorta only good if it's pee and if you're trying to put it on. Trying to do poop and wiping her while laying her down is the big challenge. She's just become too smart, and too strong for us to easily change her diaper these days. She also knows how to move to make it really hard to pick her up too. She used to be easy and great about it, but now she just wants to go off and do things. I'm not sure why she finds this particular thing so annoying to her when there are plenty of other things that she's calm and easy about doing like brushing her teeth or taking a bath. On our end we've given up a little and don't change her as often as we should which IMO isn't the best way to go. Hopefully it's a phase that doesn't last too long.
 

mrkgoo

Member
What's the deal with natural birth? My wife sounds pretty gung ho about the drugs.
We were told that the drugs have an effect on the baby, afterall, baby and mum are connected. Thigs that go into bloodstream are transported very quickly. Escalating drugs have escalating effects. Like baby can be a bit drowsy when using certain drugs.

Obviously they have been shown to be ultimately safe, but it's not total concern-free. That said, it is equally important that mum be safe and as comfortable as one can be sothere's a balance.

For thugs like epidural, side effects include not feeling contractions anymore, so they have to monitor it differently. Also rare chance of permantent paralysis.

Not trying to scare you, but just inform. After 20 hours of labour then having a contract shoved in your face by an anaesthetist saying you might get paralysed, so you have to sign a waiver is not the coolest thing in the heat ofte moment after days of no sleep, and having two minutes to decide.

Anyway, antenatal classes should cover the risks and benefits of the drug and pain options.
 

CrankyJay

Banned
Dunno. We were told an epidural was not a spinal, it goes in between vertebrae. Won't even bother telling her this. Lol.

Trying not to stress either of us out at this point.

Thanks though. Info does help.
 
What's the deal with natural birth? My wife sounds pretty gung ho about the drugs.

Watch a movie called "The Business of Being Born". My wife was 200% committed to having a natural birth at home after watching it.
Of course pretty much everything that could have gone wrong did, and we ended up having an emergency C-section but we intend to try it again if/when we get kid #2 (and they let her do VBAC).
 

Flo_Evans

Member
My wife wanted a natural birth (watched the same movie hah) but her water broke early, they had to start Pitocin since she wasn't dilated enough. After 12 hours of that she was't making any progress so they upped the Pitocin to get things moving and an epidural so she could rest.

They say it is bad to have the water broken for over 24 hours and the baby still in there (high risk of infection) She was pushing like crazy but not much was happening and they where going to do a c-section... we really didn't want this so they gave it one last shot with the vacuum extractor and the baby popped out! Such a relief.

Not what we planned at all but we had very good doctors. The movie suggests that the doctors will just try and get the baby out as fast as possible using as many dangerous procedures as the can to jack up the bill, I was leery of that going in but IMHO the doctors tried to stick to our wishes as best as possible while keeping the health of the baby and mother first.

I would say it's important to talk to your doctor before the birth and let them know your plan and make sure they are on board, but don't freak out if things don't go 100% as you hoped. In a perfect birth the doctor is just there to catch the baby, you want them there for their expertise when the shit hits the fan...
 

CrankyJay

Banned
My wife wanted a natural birth (watched the same movie hah) but her water broke early, they had to start Pitocin since she wasn't dilated enough. After 12 hours of that she was't making any progress so they upped the Pitocin to get things moving and an epidural so she could rest.

They say it is bad to have the water broken for over 24 hours and the baby still in there (high risk of infection) She was pushing like crazy but not much was happening and they where going to do a c-section... we really didn't want this so they gave it one last shot with the vacuum extractor and the baby popped out! Such a relief.

Not what we planned at all but we had very good doctors. The movie suggests that the doctors will just try and get the baby out as fast as possible using as many dangerous procedures as the can to jack up the bill, I was leery of that going in but IMHO the doctors tried to stick to our wishes as best as possible while keeping the health of the baby and mother first.

I would say it's important to talk to your doctor before the birth and let them know your plan and make sure they are on board, but don't freak out if things don't go 100% as you hoped. In a perfect birth the doctor is just there to catch the baby, you want them there for their expertise when the shit hits the fan...

Glad things went okay. I'm feeling pretty good about things, the hospital in our area has a good track record with births etc, a brand new maternity wing with private rooms, etc.

BTW, just curious...what are the going rates for doulas?

found this: http://www.doyoudoula.com/how-much-do-doulas-cost.html
 

mrkgoo

Member
My wife wanted a natural birth (watched the same movie hah) but her water broke early, they had to start Pitocin since she wasn't dilated enough. After 12 hours of that she was't making any progress so they upped the Pitocin to get things moving and an epidural so she could rest.

They say it is bad to have the water broken for over 24 hours and the baby still in there (high risk of infection) She was pushing like crazy but not much was happening and they where going to do a c-section... we really didn't want this so they gave it one last shot with the vacuum extractor and the baby popped out! Such a relief.

Not what we planned at all but we had very good doctors. The movie suggests that the doctors will just try and get the baby out as fast as possible using as many dangerous procedures as the can to jack up the bill, I was leery of that going in but IMHO the doctors tried to stick to our wishes as best as possible while keeping the health of the baby and mother first.

I would say it's important to talk to your doctor before the birth and let them know your plan and make sure they are on board, but don't freak out if things don't go 100% as you hoped. In a perfect birth the doctor is just there to catch the baby, you want them there for their expertise when the shit hits the fan...

Sounds like a terrible scare-mongering movie.

Doctors don,t get involved until necessary with us. Otherwise it is handled by the midwife.
 

MrMephistoX

Member
portant to talk to your doctor before the birth and let them know your plan and make sure they are on board, but don't freak out if things don't go 100% as you hoped. In a perfect birth the doctor is just there to catch the baby, you want them there for their expertise when the shit hits the fan...

Even if things don't go 100% according to plan a C-section is hardly the end of the world my wife was actually excited about it since we got to choose the birth date whereas I was sweating bullets especially out in the hallway when the docs were doing the spinal.
 

yuna55

Member
There was nothing wrong with my wife, that's the thing. No high blood pressure, no anxiety, no need for tests, etc. Heck, labor was only 17 hours. We just had a nurse who wanted to load her up on pitosin and not actually have to do her job. We stuck to our guns, everything went well and no one else at the hospital ever gave us any kind of flack.

Talking to other people who work there, they had nothing good to say about this specific nurse. We just had a bad luck of the draw.

We saw the same at the hospital - "Oh you're in labor? Ok, let's give you pitocin and an epidural!" That's just such standard procedure now, and it's out of the norm to have a woman come in NOT wanting to be induced, NOT wanting to take pitocin and NOT wanting an epidural. For the most part, the human body knows what to do. You give a woman pitocin, which strengthens contractions, then they need an epidural, which slows contractions, so more pitocin, then more epidural. Next thing you know, you're body is so confused and you're in an emergency c-section. Or it's time to push, but you're so doped up you can't push, and the baby's stuck in the birth canal too long, and bam - c section. Or you're one of those "I had a 4 day long labor" people. ugh, that's the stuff nightmares are made of for a pregnant woman.

All I can say is to trust your instincts. I did not want pitocin at all, and I did not want a c-section, unless we were seriously in danger. Actual danger, not "it's midnight and the doctor wants to go home" danger. They tried several times to give me pitocin, and I kept telling them to wait a half hour or so. Sure enough, a half hour would pass, and I'd be dilated further without pitocin. The last time they tried to give me pitocin (and I made them hold off yet again), my contractions became only 1 or 2 seconds apart. The baby became stressed, and they considered giving me something to STOP the contractions, but everything regulated itself in a few minutes. So what would've happened if they would have given me pitocin? I would've been in an emergency c section. I went in at 7pm on my due date and had the baby at 3am, no high blood pressure, no other reason for pitocin.

I wanted to hold off on an epidural as long as possible, but I knew I'd eventually need something. With my fibromyalgia, I knew the entire birth process would provide for a flare up to end all flare ups (I still have a hard time getting around, and the baby is 4 months), but I'm used to pain I knew I could handle labor much longer than most. I was able to use the birthing ball and relax in the jacuzzi tub and walk if I wanted, which I couldn't have done with an epi. I finally got one when I was 7 cm and my contractions were seconds apart. I was blacking out and not breathing, so the baby wasn't getting enough oxygen. Before the nurses even realized that, I already had them to give me an epidural and oxygen because I couldn't breathe and was worried about the baby. They gave me a little trigger to give myself more, but I just stuck with the initial dosage. By the time the baby came, it was already wearing off quite a bit, which I was happy with, because I could feel to push and the baby was wide awake, ready to nurse. The first few times I pushed, I was looking at the nurses like, "Am I pushing?" lol Imagine trying to poop but you can't feel anything. But it was wearing off at that point, so I could feel things without crazy pain.

I'd do it all again in a second. :3
 

yuna55

Member
Oh yea, I came here with a purpose. Has anyone experienced a milk protein allergy? What kind of formula did you end up using, if any?

I got backup formula for my mom's house just in case she eats more in a day than the bottles I pumped. We obviously can't get regular formula since it's cow's milk based. The pediatrician recommended soy formula, which we picked up. A lot of kids with a MPA also have sensitivities to soy. I guess we'll just watch her and see how she does with it. Just curious if anyone else here has dealt with that.

I haven't had cheese for almost 4 months :(
 

CrankyJay

Banned
Going for a late term sonogram in an hour...we don't know what the gender of the baby is so we're torn as to whether we should just find out now or keep going with the surprise.
 
Going for a late term sonogram in an hour...we don't know what the gender of the baby is so we're torn as to whether we should just find out now or keep going with the surprise.

Keep it a surprise. A friend of mine told it to me best; there are very few good surprises in life, but this is one of them.
 
Keep it a surprise. A friend of mine told it to me best; there are very few good surprises in life, but this is one of them.

It's still a surprise, you can either find out at the ultrasound and know what colors to paint the nursery or you can find out at time of birth and make do.

I couldn't wait that long without knowing.
 
Oh yea, I came here with a purpose. Has anyone experienced a milk protein allergy? What kind of formula did you end up using, if any?

I don't think it was an allergy but my son had bad colic after drinking milk or formula, ended up giving him probiotic and simethicone drops and that helped until he was older.

My wife got all sorts of food allergies after giving birth (wheat, dairy etc), even the baby broke out in eczema after we were feeding him a baby wheat cereal, seems he grew out of it.
 

CrankyJay

Banned
Going for a late term sonogram in an hour...we don't know what the gender of the baby is so we're torn as to whether we should just find out now or keep going with the surprise.

Keep it a surprise. A friend of mine told it to me best; there are very few good surprises in life, but this is one of them.

We decided not to find out, besides, was kind of blurry anyway.

Now the new panic du jour is the size of the kid. 3 weeks left and the person giving the sonogram said she estimates the baby is pretty tall/long and 7.4 pounds.

My wife is terrified of having a big baby because of pain, etc. Baby as an average sized head tho. w00t!

She said baby was sitting kind of low at this point. Doctor will get the results and call us if he finds anything he doesn't like, but this kid might be coming earlier than expected!
 
We decided not to find out, besides, was kind of blurry anyway.

Now the new panic du jour is the size of the kid. 3 weeks left and the person giving the sonogram said she estimates the baby is pretty tall/long and 7.4 pounds.

My wife is terrified of having a big baby because of pain, etc. Baby as an average sized head tho. w00t!

My 4 week old daughter was born 9 lbs, and it was a VBAC. Anything is possible, though it's all pretty tough to get through. Just keep telling your wife that she's a badass and she'll be AOK.
 

dionysus

Yaldog
My wife did all natural, and hearing all these stories about people failing at all natural makes me sad.

A lot of natural childbirth advocates come off as pushy, so I will try to avoid it when giving this advice.

If you want to have a natural birth, you have to make the whole process as natural as possible. Every doctor or hospital intervention increases the chances of a c-section and medication.

Choosing a hospital over a birthing center or home > chance of c-section
Choosing a doctor over a midwife > chance of c-section
Allowing frequent vaginal exams > chance of c-section
Allowing fetal monitoring, especially continuous > chance of c-section
Getting an IV > chance of c-section
Laying down on back/immobile during labor > chance of c-section
Getting pitocin >>>>>>>>>> chance of c-section
Getting epidural >>>>>>>>> chance of c-section

Take vaginal exams. You want to know the "progress" you are having right? Woohoo, she progressed from 4 to 6 cm dilation and is at 0 station!! Wrong. What happens to the mom when she shows no progress over several hours, which is the normal course of labor. This is one of the worst things you can do that most people think is harmless. It puts the mother on an arbitrary progress schedule, it increases her stress, and stress slows down labor. Even more insiduous, do the doctors ever tell you that it increases the chance of infection to the mother and baby? That vaginal exams are one of the reasons they limit labor to only 24 hrs before they give you the full court press on pitocin and c-sections.....

It is a similar story for all the other common interventions I describe above.

Everything the hospital does is set up to get the baby birthed as fast possible, no matter what. It is a business for them. In most cases for first time mothers, this means there quite natural slow labor will be sped up with pitocin, and once you have pitocin you have a 50% chance of c-section.

The things you do before pregancy also matter a lot:
1) Do research your doctor. Ask him if he does scheduled c-sections where there are no health complications. If he does he is probably not going to be supportive of natural birth.
2) DO DO DO research your hospital. The WHO estimates that at most a fair c-section rate is 10% of healthy births. In the US it is about 25% and at some hospitals it can be greater than 50%, Dallas area for one. If they are above 25% then the hospital is not going to be friendly to natural births.
3) Do educate yourself on what valid complications are that might necessitate medical intervention. Stuff like baby being sunny side up, while abnormal and more painful, is not a reason for medical intervention. Baby too big to fit is a farce.
4) Do go deal with the medical staff as if they are your enemy, because they are.
5) If you think that you will have trouble interacting with the medical staff, hire a doula.

My baby's personal birth story is a good example of faux medical emergencies that are used to justify medical intervention.
1) Water broke before labor really started
2) Labored for over 24 hours
3) Meconium (sp?), or baby stool, in amniotic fluid
4) Baby sunny-side up in birth canal
5) 42 week pregnancy according to the doctor, though we know it was actually 41 weeks

All these are used to either recommend pitocin or c-section. All of them are not legitimate reasons for either.
 

dionysus

Yaldog
42 weeks is absolutely a legitimate reason to introduce pitocin.

The average Caucasian gestation is 41 weeks. In the US, I believe the only demographic group that has a gestation period of 40 weeks is African-Americans.

In addition, both common methods for determing due date are inaccurate.
 
The average Caucasian gestation is 41 weeks. In the US, I believe the only demographic group that has a gestation period of 40 weeks is African-Americans.

In addition, both common methods for determing due date are inaccurate.

The point is you don't want to go too far past the due date without the baby coming out. It's a danger to both the baby and the mother and increases the chances of a C-section. So I think 42 weeks is perfectly reasonable to recommend pitocin. Other factors of course may apply on a per case basis, but I don't find the idea of pitocin at 42 weeks to be unwarranted. We were at 42 weeks and we would have needed a C-section had it gone on much longer despite all the doctors and evidence stating our kid was small.
 

CrankyJay

Banned
Man, 5 months into having a baby. Thinking back to pre-birth.... another life. Seriously, it feels like a life time ago. And I guess it was a very different life back then. *sigh*

Was wide awake until 4am this morning just thinking about all this, how it's going to go down, whether or not mom and baby will be okay etc. It's a lot to process.
 

mrkgoo

Member
Yeah, we're only 18 months in, and pre kid feels like a forever ago.

Do you remember those little jumpsuits they used to wear when babies? The ones with all the little snap buttons.

These things rule, and are so cute. Will be a sad day when we move from them.

Funny, also, I never really considered my self a kids person. Never really held other people's babies, and didn,t know how to interact with kids, but having your own is different. It's such a roller coaster. Sometimes you wonder what on earth you're doing, other times you can't wait till they get older, other times you wish they'd stay like they are forever.
 
New dad again here.

This is number 4, and will be our last (I had a vasectomy a few months ago)

Claire (my wife) has been in hospital for the last 3 weeks, with only 3 days at home during that time. She was induced as she had reached 36 weeks and they didn't want to leave it any longer than absolutely necessary. (Early water break). Labour lasted from 7pm last night till lunch time today.

Very healthy happy little boy came out just in time for lunch. 6lbs6. Very alert and gourgeous. Should be home in about three days.

The other three were very happy to meet the new guy his afternoon, Our 1 year old was very gentle and have him some massive hugs and kisses, we were a little worried shed be jealous.
 
I'm jealous of anyone who has more than 1 kid. My wife had our 1st at age 36 after years of trying.

The odds aren't in our favor anymore :(
 

oktarb

Member
Need a geek hobby? I plan to have a playable deck eventually.

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alphaNoid

Banned
My daughter turned 1 month today, and so far its been a breeze. If I totaled up all her crying in the past month, it might combine to be like 10 minutes max. She never crys, and when she does its only a burst here or there b/c she is hungry or dirty. My son wasn't this easy, he was for a week or so then was fairly normal I'd say. But he cried like any normal kid would.

But my newborn daughter is making this too easy. My wife is a stay at home mom, so she doesn't wake me during the week, so I get 8 hours. But even her, she gets up every 3 or 4 hours to feed the baby and has to use an alarm to wake herself up. I know better than to pretend its going to last or always stay this way, I learned that with my first.

But so far so good! Just anecdotal but thus far girls are 100x easier than boys are. Bring on the tea parties! lol

edit. The love for your daughter is so different than your son, its crazy. Theres another dimension that isn't present with my son. With him its like, "RAWR dinosaurs, piggy backs, wrestle fests, forts and being buddies'. I have a deeper connection with my 1 month old already, its kind of freaking me out.
 
My daughter turned 1 month today, and so far its been a breeze. If I totaled up all her crying in the past month, it might combine to be like 10 minutes max. She never crys, and when she does its only a burst here or there b/c she is hungry or dirty. My son wasn't this easy, he was for a week or so then was fairly normal I'd say. But he cried like any normal kid would.

But my newborn daughter is making this too easy. My wife is a stay at home mom, so she doesn't wake me during the week, so I get 8 hours. But even her, she gets up every 3 or 4 hours to feed the baby and has to use an alarm to wake herself up. I know better than to pretend its going to last or always stay this way, I learned that with my first.

But so far so good! Just anecdotal but thus far girls are 100x easier than boys are. Bring on the tea parties! lol


edit. The love for your daughter is so different than your son, its crazy. Theres another dimension that isn't present with my son. With him its like, "RAWR dinosaurs, piggy backs, wrestle fests, forts and being buddies'. I have a deeper connection with my 1 month old already, its kind of freaking me out.


100% agree.
 

MjFrancis

Member
But so far so good! Just anecdotal but thus far girls are 100x easier than boys are. Bring on the tea parties! lol
I've always thought of girls to be easier to raise than boys for the first twelve or so years and boys to be easier after those first twelve years while girls became a headache.

Just what I've soaked up from nieces, nephews and friend's children. It seems to be a popular observation.
 
100% agree.

I don't know. My soon to be 6 daughter is a drama queen. I mean, she's creative as hell and very social bit goddamn can she make a big stink over nothing, she's always been that way. My 7 year old boy is just like "whatever". She's also a terrible sleeper, good eater though. My son is the exact opposite. My son is Special Needs though (Aspergers) so there's that.
 
I don't know. My soon to be 6 daughter is a drama queen. I mean, she's creative as hell and very social bit goddamn can she make a big stink over nothing, she's always been that way. My 7 year old boy is just like "whatever". She's also a terrible sleeper, good eater though. My son is the exact opposite. My son is Special Needs though (Aspergers) so there's that.

I've found that with mine it is similar. The girls are very bloody minded, while My son just sort of just rides everything out. Love them all to bits though, they're all amazing little people
 

CrankyJay

Banned
Ugh. 38 weeks. Wife is getting menstrual like cramps. Constant pain and pressure down low, so she isn't sure if they're contractions. Sucks to be happening at midnight. She just can't get comfortable.

Don't want to rush to judgment here.
 

Flek

Banned
My daughter turned 1 month today, and so far its been a breeze. If I totaled up all her crying in the past month, it might combine to be like 10 minutes max. She never crys, and when she does its only a burst here or there b/c she is hungry or dirty. My son wasn't this easy, he was for a week or so then was fairly normal I'd say. But he cried like any normal kid would.

But my newborn daughter is making this too easy. My wife is a stay at home mom, so she doesn't wake me during the week, so I get 8 hours. But even her, she gets up every 3 or 4 hours to feed the baby and has to use an alarm to wake herself up. I know better than to pretend its going to last or always stay this way, I learned that with my first.

But so far so good! Just anecdotal but thus far girls are 100x easier than boys are. Bring on the tea parties! lol

edit. The love for your daughter is so different than your son, its crazy. Theres another dimension that isn't present with my son. With him its like, "RAWR dinosaurs, piggy backs, wrestle fests, forts and being buddies'. I have a deeper connection with my 1 month old already, its kind of freaking me out.

haha i was the same after my girl was 2 month. She slept though every night, never cried and i thought that would just stay this way…boy was i wrong - now 6 month later i can´t even remember the last time i slept a whole night or a day she doesn't cry lout like hell …
 
Once you get them on a schedule (we did around 3-4 months) you should never have many problems sleeping again. Until teething starts that is.
 

mrkgoo

Member
Once you get them on a schedule (we did around 3-4 months) you should never have many problems sleeping again. Until teething starts that is.

Never have many problems is a bold statement.

We don't get ur daughter to sleep without crying very much. She's on a schedule too.
 

poppabk

Cheeks Spread for Digital Only Future
Even if you have a schedule, it's likely to get thrown off at some point - vacations, visitors, daylight savings, long car trip that puts them to sleep at the wrong time, cold, ear infection etc. My son has been pretty good at sleeping, but he can get out of his routine pretty easy.
 

Fusebox

Banned
I'm absolutely loving watching bubs play now that she's almost one. She walks around using the furniture or her Radio Flyer, brings me toys from across the room, dances, plays chasey and everything. So much personality and so fun to just sit and watch.
 

CrankyJay

Banned
Ugh. 38 weeks. Wife is getting menstrual like cramps. Constant pain and pressure down low, so she isn't sure if they're contractions. Sucks to be happening at midnight. She just can't get comfortable.

Don't want to rush to judgment here.

Well, I didn't rush to judgment. My daughter was born yesterday during Election Day!

Wife had bad heartburn at 8pm Monday...then 10pm she woke me up to say she had awful cramps. She wasn't due until the 17th...so we chalked it up to Braxton Hicks. The pain was pre-menstrual feeling and constant, and didn't match the description of what we perceived to be contractions (a tightening of the stomach/uterine muscles).

Around midnight I decided something wasn't right and start to time them, but they were all over the place...8 minutes, 7 minutes, 2 minutes, 6 minutes, 5 minutes...not so even like was described to us.

I called our OB-GYN afterhours service and a doctor called us back and said those were contractions, so after an hour I took my wife to our hospital, and they checked her out but she was only 1cm dilated so they wouldn't admit her. Fuck.

Drove her home...poor thing was just up and walking around and the pain wouldn't stop, and she couldn't get comfortable at all. Couldn't stand, couldn't sit, couldn't lay down on either side...crying out in pain. I felt so fucking helpless, and was kind of pissed off the hospital sent us home.

We just happened to have an appointment at 8am that morning at her OBGYN for her first cervix measurement so I drove her there an hour early and they took her in, we told them she might be in labor, and they still fucking had us wait in the room for 15-20 minutes before the doctor saw her. Which really pisses me off, because I heard the fucker in the next room talking to another patient. You'd think the nursing staff would tell the doctor there was someone who thought they might be in labor.

Well he comes in, checks her out, and he's like "Oh yeah, you're in labor"...she was at like 4-5cm dilation at that point and told me to rush her to the hospital, which was about 20 minutes away.

So I got her in the car, fired up the GPS, but ignored the first half of the instructions because doing so would have got us stuck in really bad morning rush-hour traffic. But man, I was so fucking calm and controlled and was quickly (but safely) navigating weaving in and out of traffic and got her to the hospital in about 10 minutes.

She really wanted an epidural...the doctor made it sound like she'd get one right away, but we had to fucking fill out like 5 pages of questions about her health, this and that. At one point they asked me to leave the room so they could ask her if I was an abusive husband (apparently this is standard?). So after about 45-60 minutes of dicking around with that, and then testing her blood to make sure she wouldn't have clotting problems, they finally gave her the epidural and then all was fine.

She was at complete ease...baby vitals were great.

Dr. came in and asked me specifically how much I had to eat and drink because she didn't want me passing out etc. lol, so I ran down to the cafeteria and got a bag of those tato skin potato chips (Bacon and Cheddar) and a mt. dew. I slammed both and ran back in to the delivery room, high on sugar, salt, and adrenaline.

She was dilating fairly quickly at that point and they had her start pushing around 2:30...I'm just there watching the seismograph thingy for contractions, she hardly felt them.

My wife and mother in law thought I was going to be squeamish but I looked at everything and was helping hold a leg here and there, or propping her head up, getting out of the way of doctors/mid-wives when I needed to.

They had to turn her a few times to keep baby stable, and gave my wife oxygen to revitalize the baby when the heart rate was dropping a few times, but nothing overly concerning. Baby was inverse ROT, meaning it was on its side, so rotating her made the baby slide into the correct position.

After about hour and a half of pushing the head was starting to expose itself...a wrinkly little thing...sorta dark in color.

Then during the final pushes is when things got super slow-mo and surreal for me...just...the single most terrifying and awe inspiring moment of my life,I swear there were 3 people in the room working on my wife, but in that final 30 seconds when the baby heart monitor isn't picking up that heart rate, and you hear nothing but silence and this ominous beeping from the monitor. Then all of a sudden there's like 8 people in the room, and they yank that kid out and it's fucking blue with its umbilical cord draped around the side of the neck, rush me to get to cut the cord, and then put it in the warmer where a minute later the kid is red and full of life and crying. I just fucking cried.

Just an amazing experience all around, and thankful baby and wife are healthy and fine.

p.s. Please excuse the rambling in this post, I'm pretty much running on empty right now, barely any sleep the last few days.
 
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