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NFL Offseason Thread |OT2| Brought To You By Buckethead™

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squicken

Member
Growing rumors that the Jags and Jets might draft Nassib in the 2nd before the Bills get a chance to, leading to speculation that they'll draft him in the first...

...which is idiotic. I made a post a few weeks back about how early rumors suggesting the Bills trading up to the Niners 34th pick in exchange for their 2nd and a 2014 1st so they can draft Nassib.

This possibility is only strengthening now, and I'm calling it (would've been cooler if I did this weeks ago of course). This is happening on Friday.

Everyone says that the strength of the draft is in the 2nd and third round, which seems like the 49ers are well positioned to stay put. They would try and get 2014 pick with their 1st, but not sure how easy that will be
 

Goro Majima

Kitty Genovese Member
We make a lot of jokes about your qb being fat.

These are some other things that are just accepted here. The Pats are evil. Their qb is a demon spawn with no penis. Bill Bellicheat is a cheater and likes to fuck happily married women (and probably send the movie to the dad and kids, he is big into video production). Ben Roethlisberger is into raping people. Eli Manning is not into fucking people and might be scared of women. Tebow is perfect. Fuck the Jets. Green Bay Packer fans are illiterate, fat and racist. FMT is an old timer and he likes it when girls defecate on him. Wellington is abusive towards his laptops. I am a manly man who is also an awesome father, but I suck balls at avatar bets.

I approve this post.

Also:
  • Kave_Man is either a black cat or a dark Russian blue cat...either way he'd have trouble getting around in Mississippi or Alabama.

  • All Patriots fans are German especially if they have "Dutch" in the name(and potentially Nazi party members...this hasn't been confirmed)

  • Texans fans hate Matt Schaub and would rather have Mark Sanchez.

  • Buttfumble is a verb or noun to be used liberally for everything. Such as "I met this chick last night but didn't want to take her to bed and then she ignored me when I texted her the next day. Man, what a buttfumble" or "The Bears buttfumbled when they hired Mr. CFL as a coach". Can also be used in an abbreviation like "That post was a :bfp"

  • Any time a Jets fan gets mouthy the slightest bit, post the buttfumble.

  • Ari sucks because he's racist and because of him we lost LJ11, who was probably the smartest poster we had. Also because of Ari we ironically call RG3 a "cornball brotha'"

  • Also, you don't call Griffin RG3, his name around here is IRG3.

  • Buckethead is a Packer fan who makes great threads, has a thing for natural redheads, and is a gigantic hipster.

  • eznark is mean to everyone and that's just his way of saying he likes you.

  • Harson is mean to everyone because everyone is racist.

  • If you're an alt account, never tell Dragon because you'll get banned.

  • You'll learn more than you ever cared to about the Giants because Giants fans will discuss nuances of their team for 5 pages in a row

I think that's it.....I probably missed a few things.
 
I approve this post.

Also:
  • Kave_Man is either a black cat or a dark Russian blue cat...either way he'd have trouble getting around in Mississippi or Alabama.

  • All Patriots fans are German especially if they have "Dutch" in the name(and potentially Nazi party members...this hasn't been confirmed)

  • Texans fans hate Matt Schaub and would rather have Mark Sanchez.

  • Buttfumble is a verb or noun to be used liberally for everything. Such as "I met this chick last night but didn't want to take her to bed and then she ignored me when I texted her the next day. Man, what a buttfumble" or "The Bears buttfumbled when they hired Mr. CFL as a coach". Can also be used in an abbreviation like "That post was a :bfp"

  • Any time a Jets fan gets mouthy the slightest bit, post the buttfumble.

  • Ari sucks because he's racist and because of him we lost LJ11, who was probably the smartest poster we had. Also because of Ari we ironically call RG3 a "cornball brotha'"

  • Also, you don't call Griffin RG3, his name around here is IRG3.

  • Buckethead is a Packer fan who makes great threads, has a thing for natural redheads, and is a gigantic hipster.

  • eznark is mean to everyone and that's just his way of saying he likes you.

  • Harson is mean to everyone because everyone is racist.

  • If you're an alt account, never tell Dragon because you'll get banned.


    [*]You'll learn more than you ever cared to about the Giants because Giants fans will discuss nuances of their team for 5 pages in a row

I think that's it.....I probably missed a few things.
iG1iUZO9EwXWz.gif
 

Fox318

Member
I approve this post.

Also:
  • Kave_Man is either a black cat or a dark Russian blue cat...either way he'd have trouble getting around in Mississippi or Alabama.

  • All Patriots fans are German especially if they have "Dutch" in the name(and potentially Nazi party members...this hasn't been confirmed)

  • Texans fans hate Matt Schaub and would rather have Mark Sanchez.

  • Buttfumble is a verb or noun to be used liberally for everything. Such as "I met this chick last night but didn't want to take her to bed and then she ignored me when I texted her the next day. Man, what a buttfumble" or "The Bears buttfumbled when they hired Mr. CFL as a coach". Can also be used in an abbreviation like "That post was a :bfp"

  • Any time a Jets fan gets mouthy the slightest bit, post the buttfumble.

  • Ari sucks because he's racist and because of him we lost LJ11, who was probably the smartest poster we had. Also because of Ari we ironically call RG3 a "cornball brotha'"

  • Also, you don't call Griffin RG3, his name around here is IRG3.

  • Buckethead is a Packer fan who makes great threads, has a thing for natural redheads, and is a gigantic hipster.

  • eznark is mean to everyone and that's just his way of saying he likes you.

  • Harson is mean to everyone because everyone is racist.

  • If you're an alt account, never tell Dragon because you'll get banned.

  • You'll learn more than you ever cared to about the Giants because Giants fans will discuss nuances of their team for 5 pages in a row

I think that's it.....I probably missed a few things.
Fuck the buttfumble
 
I like Ogletree to the Packers. They need LB help, the character red flags shouldn't bother them as they have a stable locker room/organization and Ogletree offers sideline to sideline speed/ability and being a converted safety should help the "toughness" factor they're looking for.

No way the Packers take Lacy in the first.
 
Darren Connolly IV ‏@DConnollyNFL 3h

Hearing potential trade would include "multiple 2013/2014 draft picks as well as players" being involved #NFLDraft #Raiders #Falcons

Source here in #Atlanta : #Falcons and #Raiders in "very serious discussions" involving a trade including Raiders 1st round pick #NFLDraft


would the Falcons really wanna trade up to the no. 3 pick? I'm not sure I would wanna drop that far. wonder what players would be involved.
 

Draxal

Member
I approve this post.

Also:
  • Buttfumble is a verb or noun to be used liberally for everything. Such as "I met this chick last night but didn't want to take her to bed and then she ignored me when I texted her the next day. Man, what a buttfumble" or "The Bears buttfumbled when they hired Mr. CFL as a coach". Can also be used in an abbreviation like "That post was a :bfp"
  • Any time a Jets fan gets mouthy the slightest bit, post the buttfumble.
  • You'll learn more than you ever cared to about the Giants because Giants fans will discuss nuances of their team for 5 pages in a row

I think that's it.....I probably missed a few things.

I think we need to have a discussion on Kevin Boothe's posterior, and how it rates on the buttfumble scale.
 
I like Ogletree to the Packers. They need LB help, the character red flags shouldn't bother them as they have a stable locker room/organization and Ogletree offers sideline to sideline speed/ability and being a converted safety should help the "toughness" factor they're looking for.

No way the Packers take Lacy in the first.

Pay attention, Eli!

Ogletree is a Bear already.
 

Colasante

Member
:bfp's

Why on Earth would the Packers want to take the ball away from Aaron Rodgers? Running back is probably the least important position on the roster for Green Bay. Also, we're looking into bringing Cedric Benson back.

Cedric Benson?!

yaaaa.gif


Not that I disagree about taking the ball out of Rodgers' hands, but the Packers do need a real running back. They don't need Lacy in the 1st though.
 

Wes

venison crêpe
:bfp's

Why on Earth would the Packers want to take the ball away from Aaron Rodgers? Running back is probably the least important position on the roster for Green Bay. Also, we're looking into bringing Cedric Benson back.

Because he was a player whose name I knew who hadn't been picked yet.
 

ChanHuk

Banned
would the Falcons really wanna trade up to the no. 3 pick? I'm not sure I would wanna drop that far. wonder what players would be involved.

Not gonna happen, the Falcon's pick is basically a high second rounder. They would have to basically mortgage their future like they mortgaged for Julio Jones, at least that worked out for them. For them to get the #3 pick they would have to give up this years first, 2014, 2015, and second rounders from each of those years.
 

Wes

venison crêpe
would the Falcons really wanna trade up to the no. 3 pick? I'm not sure I would wanna drop that far. wonder what players would be involved.

I would think, for what it's worth, Raiders would love to do that trade. This year is a wash for them, proper rebuilding year. They're going to have a high pick next year then throw in a bunch of other picks? You would have to think McKenzie would love that.
 
How about safety for the Packers? I know that's a massive need for them.

Any safeties considered good end of round 1 value? (Reid/Cyprien/Elam?)
 

ChanHuk

Banned
I would think, for what it's worth, Raiders would love to do that trade. This year is a wash for them, proper rebuilding year. They're going to have a high pick next year then throw in a bunch of other picks? You would have to think McKenzie would love that.

It'll be too expensive for the Falcons to do, but that being said, I'm all for it. It would be basically #3 for Falcons 2013 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 2014 + 2015 1st. I'm thinking that at the least.

Oh and the batterylife on the 3DS XL fucking blows faster Cleveland prostitutes. This thing can barely last a 1/4 of my shift at work. Top it off, proprietary power cable, as if Apple didn't have me by the balls already with proprietary cables.
 

Goro Majima

Kitty Genovese Member
I think we need to have a discussion on Kevin Boothe's posterior, and how it rates on the buttfumble scale.

Well here's the worst play I've ever seen by Eli Manning:

Eli Manning head first slide, 4th down fumble

While his decision making was "buttfumblesque", notice how he runs right by Kevin Boothe's buttchecks without the slightest desire to faceplant into them. So while I think Eli may have the occasional flash of stupidity to recreate the buttfumble, his fondness for large black men's behinds isn't quite there to be a cause of concern.

So I'd say he would be a 3/10 on the buttfumble scale.

Because he was a player whose name I knew who hadn't been picked yet.

That's okay, I picked Xavier Rhodes because he was the BPA left on other people's mocks.
 

Wes

venison crêpe
Falcons definitely seem on the move though. I doubt they go that high but I have to believe where there's as much smoke as there is around them, they're looking to go up somewhere. My bet would be to 12 or 13.
 
Well here's the worst play I've ever seen by Eli Manning:

Eli Manning head first slide, 4th down fumble

While his decision making was "buttfumblesque", notice how he runs right by Kevin Boothe's buttchecks without the slightest desire to faceplant into them. So while I think Eli may have the occasional flash of stupidity to recreate the buttfumble, his fondness for large black men's behinds isn't quite there to be a cause of concern.

So I'd say he would be a 3/10 on the buttfumble scale.
The left hand toss in the end zone against the Cowboys that got picked is way worse. Nothing to do with the buttfumble but a big low for Eli in the dumb fuck decisions department.;)
 

ChanHuk

Banned
Falcons definitely seem on the move though. I doubt they go that high but I have to believe where there's as much smoke as there is around them, they're looking to go up somewhere. My bet would be to 12 or 13.

I can see them trading with the Jets. Chargers are looking to move up for an OT. Actually dream scenario would be for Raiders to trade down to Chargers for their 1st, 2nd, and 4th. Then trade down again with the Falcons for their 1st, 2nd, 5th, and next year's 1st.
 
It'll be too expensive for the Falcons to do, but that being said, I'm all for it. It would be basically #3 for Falcons 2013 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 2014 + 2015 1st. I'm thinking that at the least.




I'm not sure we'd get that much, but yeah would definitely be expensive for ATL. Assuming they are targeting Fisher, seems like a lot to give up for an LT.

And I wonder what players would be involved that could also lower the price, draft pick wise.

I think I'd prefer to deal with the Phins, but that's looking less likely and there were rumors that the Jets lol were interested in moving up to take Milliner which would make perfect sense for them to do something like that.


Falcons definitely seem on the move though. I doubt they go that high but I have to believe where there's as much smoke as there is around them, they're looking to go up somewhere. My bet would be to 12 or 13.


I don't know too much about ATL, wonder who they are targeting?
 

Plinko

Wildcard berths that can't beat teams without a winning record should have homefield advantage
mathieuresize.jpg


I'm guessing mine got lost in the post. Or was sold for crack.

Is this real? 1st round pick? Really?

Also, that Falcons/Raiders trade makes absolutely no sense to me. The Raiders need that pick.
 
Ideally I'd love to trade back and still snag Warmack late in the round. Problem is every team wants to trade back and no one wants to trade up. If DeCastro fell, so will Warmack, most especially because he can only play G.

So if Canfora spouts every pick before it happens on Twitter, are you guys going to post it here right after? If so, I'm going full blackout. I hated that recent draft where the camera spoiled each pick before it happened.
 

bionic77

Member
:bfp's

Why on Earth would the Packers want to take the ball away from Aaron Rodgers? Running back is probably the least important position on the roster for Green Bay. Also, we're looking into bringing Cedric Benson back.
A good running back would make it impossible to defend the Packers on offense. Right now no one give a fuck about your current running backs and defenses dare you to run the ball. If you had a real running back then one it would open up things even more for your WR corps. And with a real running back to run out the clock at the end of games, Erron would definitely choke away less games in the 4th quarter.

Its win win.

But you are probably right that getting a defense is probably the main priority.

Also, :lol Cedric Benson. Now I don't feel so horrible about our shitty situation at RB!
 
Is this real? 1st round pick? Really?

Also, that Falcons/Raiders trade makes absolutely no sense to me. The Raiders need that pick.




We need more than just one guy tho. With no 2nd rounder we desperately want to trade down.


Darren Connolly IV ‏@DConnollyNFL 13m

Source in #Falcons organization says "if our guy is there, we will pull the trigger, the package is agreed upon" #Raiders #NFLDraft


Hmmm... should be a crazy draft.
 

ChanHuk

Banned
I'm not sure we'd get that much, but yeah would definitely be expensive for ATL. Assuming they are targeting Fisher, seems like a lot to give up for an LT.

And I wonder what players would be involved that could also lower the price, draft pick wise.

I think I'd prefer to deal with the Phins, but that's looking less likely and there were rumors that the Jets lol were interested in moving up to take Milliner which would make perfect sense for them to do something like that.





I don't know too much about ATL, wonder who they are targeting?

They'd have to give up a lot for the #3 overall, they're gonna be contenders this year and probably next so factor those in as essentially high 2nd round picks. Future picks are worth about half of what they are worth during a draft.

I think ATL is targeting a pass rusher and DB. But there isn't a top tier 4-3 DE that's worth a #3 overall.
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0aYAhmXZa-8

This one against the Titans? Or did he do it twice?

The guy is a menace if so.

An awesome Jedi menace who destroys the Dark Lord Brady
It was against the Cowboys in 2010 if memory serves. The lights out game where Metlife lost power. That one was way worse. It was a slant to Hakeem if memory serves, he got pressure up the middle, moved up and did a tiny lob over to Nicks which got picked and returned for 6.

Yes, even worse than that toss up to the Titans. 2010 was an amazing year. 10-6 team that led the league in turnovers (over 40!) and missed the playoffs. Most of them by Eli, yeah. Some were dumb fuck decisions like that and others tipped passes by the receivers.

If it wasn't for the defense also leading the league in turnovers and doing a pretty damned good job when having to defense the most awful field position - it would have been much much worse.
 

Wes

venison crêpe
I don't know too much about ATL, wonder who they are targeting?

Supposedly a DT or a CB. I find the CB link hard to believe as there are a bunch of CBs, around the same abilitiy, than can be had in the 20s. Sheldon Richardson has been heavily mooted in the mid teen rounds. Their main competition for one of Floyd, Lotulelei and richardson will be Panthers at 14.
 

Draxal

Member
Well here's the worst play I've ever seen by Eli Manning:

Eli Manning head first slide, 4th down fumble

While his decision making was "buttfumblesque", notice how he runs right by Kevin Boothe's buttchecks without the slightest desire to faceplant into them. So while I think Eli may have the occasional flash of stupidity to recreate the buttfumble, his fondness for large black men's behinds isn't quite there to be a cause of concern.

So I'd say he would be a 3/10 on the buttfumble scale.

.

Oh god, that is the worst play he ever did (I actually remember it a bit differently but I think I kinda transposed the Sehorn fumble onto that play).

I honestly think that was worse than the DeSean Jackson disaster.
 

Colasante

Member
I could see the Falcons trying to trade up for Dion Jordan. Makes sense that they would be targeting him at 3, since he's been linked to the Jaguars a lot and there's a thought that he wouldn't make it past the Eagles at 4. Falcons' pass rush will come primarily from Osi Umenyiora at this point, and they don't have a good enough secondary to cover for the lack of it. Dimitroff also has a kind of obsession with extremely athletic players, which is why he coveted Julio Jones so much, and Dion Jordan certainly fits that bill.
 

jbug617

Banned
I could see the Falcons trying to trade up for Dion Jordan. Makes sense that they would be targeting him at 3, since he's been linked to the Jaguars a lot and there's a thought that he wouldn't make it past the Eagles at 4. Falcons' pass rush will come primarily from Osi Umenyiora at this point, and they don't have a good enough secondary to cover for the lack of it. Dimitroff also has a kind of obsession with extremely athletic players, which is why he coveted Julio Jones so much, and Dion Jordan certainly fits that bill.

Atlanta also has a need for a CB but I think they could get Milliner later.
 

ChanHuk

Banned
I could see the Falcons trying to trade up for Dion Jordan. Makes sense that they would be targeting him at 3, since he's been linked to the Jaguars a lot and there's a thought that he wouldn't make it past the Eagles at 4. Falcons' pass rush will come primarily from Osi Umenyiora at this point, and they don't have a good enough secondary to cover for the lack of it. Dimitroff also has a kind of obsession with extremely athletic players, which is why he coveted Julio Jones so much, and Dion Jordan certainly fits that bill.

Dion Jordan would get dismantled full time as a 4-3 DE in the NFL. He's athletic but this is the NFL, everyone is athletic. He's too much of a tweener I think to play DE full time unless he puts on another 10-15 lbs.
 

Wes

venison crêpe
@brentsobleski 2h

Source: A total of eight teams have already told WVU WR Tavon Austin they will select him if he's on the board -- including one Top 10 team

In reference to this I posted earlier, via Rotoworld:

ESPN's Sal Paolantonio stated on Philly's 97.5 The Fanatic that he's heard the Eagles are targeting a tackle at No. 4 overall, with West Virginia's Tavon Austin as the primary fallback option.

Paolantonio's Eagles nuggets are always notable because he's covered the team for years and is so plugged-in. "Here is what a general manager told me [on Monday]," Sal Pal said, "‘I know the Eagles want a tackle.’ And if those are all gone, he said, ‘Don’t be shocked if Chip Kelly takes Tavon Austin No. 4.'" Because of his athletic movement skills, Oklahoma's Lane Johnson may be the Eagles' top target. Austin would be an exciting alternative.

In other news:

CSN Philadelphia passes along "a lot of buzz today" about Florida State QB E.J. Manuel going in the top-20 picks on Thursday night.

Our initial reaction is skepticism, but the NFL draft isn't predictable and teams that covet high-ceiling quarterbacks will be very high on strong-armed, athletic Manuel. On SportsCenter Wednesday, ESPN's Ron Jaworski agreed Manuel has the "highest upside of any QB in this class" and rated him the position's No. 3 prospect, behind only Geno Smith and Ryan Nassib. We don't believe Manuel would last beyond the Eagles' second-rounder at No. 35.
 
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