sf2fanatic
Member
Adam Pierce has the NWA title which he carried around during the tapings. There is still the tag team titles but maybe the TV title did get an upgrade to big champ status. I gotta check the site
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November Wrasslin |OT| CM Punk's Countdown to RESPECT
- Thread starter Kaladin
- Start date
Adam Pierce has the NWA title which he carried around during the tapings. There is still the tag team titles but maybe the TV title did get an upgrade to big champ status. I gotta check the site
who cares, he earned it!
sf2fanatic
Member
Titles like that remind me of the old days when IC,US, and even Euro champs fought hard tough matches against quality wrestlers. Thats why I like to watch this show
yup definitely makes up for that AJ crap I watched earlier.
I miss hard fought battles rather than shitty storylines.
sonikokaruto
Banned
ok that's it, i'm funding the non american kliq right here, right now wrasslegaf, now i just need a CEO and a foreign embassador
Sounds like a great idea, these Americans have ruined Wrasslin' for way too long.
mechashiva
Member
So you can have one Kane right?
Say what you will about Triple G, but he does generate the best hell.
British Monsoon
Member
NJPW announced there will be a PPV from Hiroshima on February 10th, so we have the Tag League Finals on 12/02, Wrestle Kingdom VII on 01/04 and the Hiroshima PPV on 02/10. Nice.
TenKoji will appear on the DDT 12/23 show, wrestling a team from DDT's Monster Army faction (consisting of Yasu Urano, Antonio Honda, Masa Takanashi, Daisuke Sasaki, Hoshitango and Yuji Hino). Also on the show, El Generico defends the KO-D Openweight Title against Kenny Omega!
It was because the new NWA owners wouldn't sanction the final match of Pearce and Cabana's 7 Stages of Hell feud as an NWA Title Match, as they didn't want Colt to be champion. So Pearce abandoned the belt and NWA Hollywood left the NWA as a result.
It's pretty stupid to be arguing about snitches when no one has snitched on anyone for a good while. Who brought this shit back up anyway? Frankly, it makes me want to post the most utterly disgusting, totally NSFW deathmatch .gif I have in my collection. There. Happy now? I thought not.
TenKoji will appear on the DDT 12/23 show, wrestling a team from DDT's Monster Army faction (consisting of Yasu Urano, Antonio Honda, Masa Takanashi, Daisuke Sasaki, Hoshitango and Yuji Hino). Also on the show, El Generico defends the KO-D Openweight Title against Kenny Omega!
It was because the new NWA owners wouldn't sanction the final match of Pearce and Cabana's 7 Stages of Hell feud as an NWA Title Match, as they didn't want Colt to be champion. So Pearce abandoned the belt and NWA Hollywood left the NWA as a result.
It's pretty stupid to be arguing about snitches when no one has snitched on anyone for a good while. Who brought this shit back up anyway? Frankly, it makes me want to post the most utterly disgusting, totally NSFW deathmatch .gif I have in my collection. There. Happy now? I thought not.
You think that's bad, I had a emergency grass cutting going on at the campgrounds.
Whew, took care of it though. Dat out of control crab grass
Whew, I'm gonna turn on my peecee and play some of that.
The menu music alone is reason enough to get it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8SWFZHihHs
Old wrestling fucking sucked. It's not like classical music, that shit's just bad until the late 70s.
you're finished
I am very curious about your avatar. Who is it?
Looks like a Ms. Marvel doll (and Lou Thesz carries on spinning in his grave).
it's actually a girl, who happens to look like a doll.
Good things do come from deviantart
Over the last year, I have grown to really hate three chants: "This is awesome," "This is wrestling" and chanting the name of the promotion. I also find the "Wrrrrrrresling! Yay!" chants to be annoying too. I hate them because of how overused they are, how it reminds me that I'm just watching a performance instead of a competition and how they make everyone inside the ring at the time interchangeable.
Don't get me wrong. I don't have trouble with fans chanting or being vocal in general. It's just those three chants that get on my nerves everytime I hear them. I can't really blame people who just want to have a good time at wrestling shows and chant whatever.
I've seen so many matches get the "This is awesome" chant no matter what the quality is actually like. It's come to the point where it can ruin a match for me. I'm usually invested enough to care who wins and loses when I watch wrestling. Then this chant comes along and tells me it doesn't matter who wins because everyone did something "awesome" and that's all they care about.
"This is wrestling" just comes off as dumb but maybe that's just me. I see wrestling as a multitude of styles and ideas. It's a bizarre monster that can be adapted to be a straight sport, a dramatic soap opera or a wacky comedy and I don't find one style to be more defined than another. So it annoys me when I hear "This Is Wrestling" during a 30 minute ROH main event or an indie-riffic PWG tag team spotfest. To me, Chikara and DDT are just as much pro wrestling as WWE and New Japan are. This chant also feels like a cry for acceptance that falls on deaf ears. What, you think this sort of recognition is going to make more people take pro wrestling seriously?
Chanting the promotion's name non-stop bothers me because it gets no one over at the end. I'll choose TNA and the X Division as an example. During its prime the fans would chant "TNA! TNA! TNA!" during exciting moments like Chris Sabin diving out of the ring or Chris Daniels doing cool spots with AJ Styles. Problem is everyone always chanted TNA instead of the wrestlers. So it didn't matter if it was AJ or Daniels or Petey Williams or Alex Shelley in the ring. They were all interchangeable. At least chant the guy's name or something.
Don't get me wrong. I don't have trouble with fans chanting or being vocal in general. It's just those three chants that get on my nerves everytime I hear them. I can't really blame people who just want to have a good time at wrestling shows and chant whatever.
I've seen so many matches get the "This is awesome" chant no matter what the quality is actually like. It's come to the point where it can ruin a match for me. I'm usually invested enough to care who wins and loses when I watch wrestling. Then this chant comes along and tells me it doesn't matter who wins because everyone did something "awesome" and that's all they care about.
"This is wrestling" just comes off as dumb but maybe that's just me. I see wrestling as a multitude of styles and ideas. It's a bizarre monster that can be adapted to be a straight sport, a dramatic soap opera or a wacky comedy and I don't find one style to be more defined than another. So it annoys me when I hear "This Is Wrestling" during a 30 minute ROH main event or an indie-riffic PWG tag team spotfest. To me, Chikara and DDT are just as much pro wrestling as WWE and New Japan are. This chant also feels like a cry for acceptance that falls on deaf ears. What, you think this sort of recognition is going to make more people take pro wrestling seriously?
Chanting the promotion's name non-stop bothers me because it gets no one over at the end. I'll choose TNA and the X Division as an example. During its prime the fans would chant "TNA! TNA! TNA!" during exciting moments like Chris Sabin diving out of the ring or Chris Daniels doing cool spots with AJ Styles. Problem is everyone always chanted TNA instead of the wrestlers. So it didn't matter if it was AJ or Daniels or Petey Williams or Alex Shelley in the ring. They were all interchangeable. At least chant the guy's name or something.
Nocturnowl
Member
Well it didn't until Beef and Soul went and botched everything a few pages back, they're just went and Kevin Nash'd everything, you gotta believe me!
Definitely
British Monsoon
Member
I kinda agree with Dragonzord. I generally don't go any further back than 1970 when it comes to wrestling.
Yeah, I'm really not a fan, especially of "This is wrestling". So dumb. "This is awesome" has become totally overused and meaningless too. I also really dislike when you've got one or two morons in a crowd trying to get themselves over by shouting dumb shit at wrestlers, although I haven't noticed too much of that recently.
Generally though, I prefer a crowd to be making noise. When WWE crowds are bored, they just seem to sit on their hands and shut up entirely, but in indy wrestling when the crowd dies down, or the match pace slows, you usually have someone start a duelling chant, or one of the wrestlers start a clap going, etc. It's better to be making some noise than no noise at all.
I really like Japanese crowds though, because they're consistent - polite clapping, people randomly calling out to their favourite wrestler, the occasional chant and then that sort of rising "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" throughout the crowd when something crazy happens/is about to happen.
Yeah, I'm really not a fan, especially of "This is wrestling". So dumb. "This is awesome" has become totally overused and meaningless too. I also really dislike when you've got one or two morons in a crowd trying to get themselves over by shouting dumb shit at wrestlers, although I haven't noticed too much of that recently.
Generally though, I prefer a crowd to be making noise. When WWE crowds are bored, they just seem to sit on their hands and shut up entirely, but in indy wrestling when the crowd dies down, or the match pace slows, you usually have someone start a duelling chant, or one of the wrestlers start a clap going, etc. It's better to be making some noise than no noise at all.
I really like Japanese crowds though, because they're consistent - polite clapping, people randomly calling out to their favourite wrestler, the occasional chant and then that sort of rising "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" throughout the crowd when something crazy happens/is about to happen.
I agree. As long as you're chanting for someone in the match, then it's great.
I posted my opinion on the F4W board and someone mentioned Kevin Steen's reaction to the "This Is Wrestling" chants. Steen yelled "Of course this is wrestling, you dumb shit!" which is probably the most perfect response anyone could make.
I posted my opinion on the F4W board and someone mentioned Kevin Steen's reaction to the "This Is Wrestling" chants. Steen yelled "Of course this is wrestling, you dumb shit!" which is probably the most perfect response anyone could make.
Arrowgigantic
Member
Nocturnowl
Member
KOG is like your version of Mr America, i'm going to hook you up to a lie detector and go " IT'S G-FEX! G-FEX! G-FEX! G-FEX!" and you can be all like "NO! NO! NO! NO!" and the lie detector will beep 4 times.
It'll be great.
Nocturnowl
Member
Good, I'm glad.
Arrowgigantic
Member
WCW Monday Nitro 1/10/2000
TLDR: Nitro wasn't bad.
Show starts off with a recap of the nWo shenanigans with Double A over the past week. Terry Funk now has a team of other old dudes. Terry Funk, Arn Anderson, Larry Zbyszko, and Paul Orndorff. We are 6 days away from Souled Out. Most of the arena is weirdly dark, so I imagine that means that no one in Buffalo gave a shit about WCW.
Dean Malenko/Saturn vs Konnan/Kidman. Shane Douglas on commentary. Shane immediately talks about the script and cues and whatnot. They brawl for a bit and then Crowbar and David Flair came out. Apparently this was a triple threat match for the tag belts. I wish Kidman would have left with The Radicalz. Weapons are being used with no call for a DQ. Saturn and Malenko brawl with Rey on the floor, then Perry darts into the crowd. Oh shit, the merchandise table. Rey is put on the table and Saturn jumps off the balcony, CRUSHING little Rey. Brain says it was at least 60 or 70 feet in the air. David Flair pops up OUTTA NOWHERE and pins Saturn. I guess it was a falls count anywhere match, as well.
Tony tells us this is normally the time when they'd give us the run down of the show, but Commissioner Funk is just going to "book it on the fly", and that they'll know what's going on when we know what's going on. We will see an interview with Stevie Ray, though. Also, a face to face meeting between DDP and Buff. If either man strikes the other in the 5 minutes allotted to their segment, they will be fined $50,000.
TO THE BACK. nWo limo. It's Scotty's birthday, apparently. Nash got him a limo of yaks. April Hunter and Major Guns are the only ones I recognize. Now the Old Horsemen are watching it, disgusted no doubt because their dicks don't work anymore. Rey is being put into an ambulance. He looks like he's having a seizure, but I guess he was just fighting them. Scotty gets the yaks to bounce around. He's going to fuck them like Mean Gene.
Oklahoma is out for a PROMO PROMO PROMO! Note, they changed the the ramp so people wouldn't trip on it anymore. Typical barefoot and pregnant promo. "Would Ralph have let Alice get into a wrasslin ring and wrassle a man?" So not only is Ed doing a parody of JR, but he's also redoing the Jarrett/Chyna storyline at the same time. An open challenge to any woman who can be ol' Oklahoma. Asya accepts. Of course, a JR knock off against a Chyna knock off in a Jarret/Chyna storyline knock off. It all makes so much sense. After some brawling with Asya slamming OK on the floor, OK hits her with the BBQ bottle and Madusa strolls out. Wearing a blue wig and outfit with blue boas sewn in. Oklahoma breaks a broom over her. "Now she has no way to get home", says Brain.
TO THE BACK. Funk and his men are walking around, looking old and grumpy. Bret, Kev, and Jarrett are trying to check up on Scotty. He only does 2-3 at a time. Kevin peeks in, likes what he sees, and then they walk off. This is followed by Slim Jim (with Macho in a straight jacket) and AOL 5.0 commercials.
Funk, Arn, Larry, and Mr. Wonderful hobble out. The ramp is back to normal. That's weird. I guess they covered it up so the women could come out in heels. All 3 of his buddies were unemployed. THE OLD AGE OUTLAWS! That's the official name. I wonder why Arn never got rid of the tuft of hair in the front. It's been the only think up there since the mid 80s, you'd think he'd have come to terms with baldness by now. Larry points out that the millennium doesn't really start until 2001, so there is no new millennium or new world order. Paul Orndorff points out the Power Plant dudes. I honestly can't understand most of what he is saying. Like, every 3-4 words I can understand. I guess the nWo are sick of trying to figure out what the fuck Paul was trying to say. The nWo and associated yaks come out. This is great as the main angle of the company. Nash makes fun of Funk's Target outfit. Funk says fuck this shit, I'm making matches. Double J is now in 3 matches tonight. A wrassle match, a Bunkhouse Brawl, and a cage match. Every match will be against a friend of Funk. When asking if Larry would be one of his opponents, Jeff says he would have to apologize because "I'm gonna stretch his ass like it's never been stretched before." Yep. He said that. Terry Funk is straight up embarrassing. It's like when your grandpa talks a bit too much at a family gathering. He rambles, fucks up his lines, repeats them, fucks them up again, then rambles some more. Chris Benoit will be the special ref for all 3 matches. And now he's putting Bret in a title match against Kevin Nash! They're like brothers, they'd never fight. If they take it easy on each other, they will be suspended for a year without pay and Bret will be stripped of the belt. Nash, unlike Funk, saved his money, and he's about 6 hours away from getting his correspondence in gynecology, so he's not worried about taking a year off. Neither is Bret. "You're gonna lose the belt Bret." "I don't care about this belt." Steiner grabs the mic and the censors do a prolonged beep the entire time he was speaking.
TO THE BACK. Old dudes are discussing..stuff. Arn is sent on an errand. Buff is on his way to the arena. DDP is on his way. DDP is in black, Buff is in white. Arn is walking out to a limo. It was Kim. Looking hot as fuck.
Mene Gene conducts an interview with Buff and DDP. I hope he fucked the shit out of that yak after Thunder. Mene Gene fucks up and says "He is the stuff.......He is DDP." There is a 5 minute clock. DDP tells Gene to step off, and he does. So now it is just Buff and DDP. "How's your wife." OHHHHH. "We're just friends. I'm a great listener." Lol. Now DDP has the small dick. And then he calls Buff a jack off. "Don't go there." "I'm there." Buff was feeding Kim drinks one night after a show. DDP told Buff they were having problems, and then Buff tries to fuck Kim. Kim is watching this backstage. I think Buff admitted it, and then took it back. "Why the hell should I trust you?" "Why the hell shouldn't you?" Now they're talking about Kim's birthmark. Buff's definitely seen that, but so have all the boys in the back. Buff gets decked. Buff brought a retractable baton with him. The fuck? He's the face here? So, he's innocent, but brought a retractable police baton with him? That seems a bit extreme. Segment ends with Buff beating on DDP with his police baton.
TO THE BACK. nWo are brainstorming. Bret and Kevin start arguing, because Bret says he knows he can beat him, he has before. So now they're going to have a match for realises. Arn's bros show up, apparently.
Chris Benoit is out to ref the first match of Double J's series. I don't remember this theme at all. However, I don't think Jarrett's is even a Jimmy Hart version of Cowboy. Pretty sure it is the song without the lyrics. The Old Age Outlaws come out to introduce the first opponent. Jeff Jarrett vs.....GEORGE THE ANIMAL STEEL! Well, at least it made sense for WCW to bring in 70s/80s WWF guys for their show in Buffalo. You would think that WCW would bring in Georgia territory legends or something for a show in New York. Apparently, The Animal was one of the first hardcore wrestlers. Jarrett tries to get his hands up, but somehow George manages to crack him right in the dome every time. Turnbuckle eating. This distracts George enough to allow for a guitar shot, but Arn is right there to hit a SPINEBUSTER, giving George Steel the win. In 2012.
TO THE BACK. Steiner is exiting the locker room and getting some more yaks in, while Bret and Nash get taped up for their match. JJ suggests they get rid of Bret. Steiner apparently agrees, but he's too busy fucking yaks to be there to say it. The Old Age Outlaws are hanging out with George. Arn is sent on another errand.
Mean Gene's guest at this time is none other than Stevie Ray. He almost breaks his ankle on the ramp. Stevie says that none of the announcers can do their jobs. Fruit booties is muted. 7 years ago, Harlem Heat was held down. Some reference to Bruno Margley (?) shoes and what happened to the last person wearing them out. I don't really get the reference. But apparently Booker is dressing too nice to be from the hood anymore was the main idea. CRACKA JACK FRUIT BOOTY! Match is signed for Souled Out.
TO THE BACK. Jeff is now convincing Bret that Nash is the problem. Arn is still waiting outside.
Jeff Jarret vs.....TITO SANTANA! I'm ok with this. I'd be ok with Tito getting an IC title run tomorrow. Pretty big pop for him, too. He looks like he hadn't aged at all since 1992. Although he is wearing the Matador outfit, but in black at least. Oh, good. Funk is on commentary. Funk says the nWo are a bunch of roid heads. Not steroids, though. Hemorrhoids in between their heads. Jeff is wearing a Titans jersey and heeling on the Buffalo Bills that are at ringside. This is actually hilarious. This is a Dungeon match. Which means pinfalls, submissions, or going to the outside will end the match. Except at Souled Out, the ring will have no ropes. This is..not as good as I'd hoped. They aren't even reading the same book. Benoit won't count the pin, Larry is on one side of the ring, dude from the Bills on the other side of the ring, and Mr. Wonderful hits a giant piledriver. Tito gets the win after a fast count. Clearly, WWE faces are taking their cues from WCW 2000 faces. Cheating sumbitches.
TO THE BACK. Tank is walking around. He's going to fuck someone up. He was fined $15,000 for punching Doug Dillinger.
Tank is now trying to cut a promo in the ring. He is so uncomfortable on the mic. But he's hilarious. Duck Body Doug Dillinger. Huckleberry Flynn. He's going to offer Doug a free shot. "Get that fat duck ass out here." Doug goes in alone. Doug did punch him, right in the face, but then was taken down. Security immediately jumps Tank and hand cuffs him. Jerry Flynn comes out and kicks Tank in the head while he's handcuffed.
TO THE BACK. Jeff is walking around talking to himself. Arn's last bro shows up. SUPAFLY! Bret is still prepping. Nash is stretching like a mother fucker. Chris Benoit is laying on the floor in the back.
Jeff Jarrett vs Superfly Jimmy Snuka in a STEEL CAGE MATCH, playa. He freely admits to taking Benoit out. Snuka has looked so ancient for 15 years now. Jeff gets the early jump on Snuka. Benoit makes his way out anyway. Jarrett won't let Benoit in the cage. Bobby is talking about how great of a champion Jeff is, to fight all these odds that have been stacked against him. And he's right. The authority figure books him in 3 matches with unknown opponents, with his PPV opponent as the ref in all of the matches, and screws him out of every match even when he would have won. Benoit gets in, they fight, Larry and Paul come in. Snuka climbs to the top of one side of the cage, Benoit to the other, and they both hit their moves. Which makes so much sense that they had Saturn dive off the balcony in the very first match when they were going to have Snuka and Benoit diving off the cage later. Jarrett was injured in this match.
TO THE BACK. Nash and Hart make their way to the ring. Steiner is still crushing yaks, but he's getting tired. A splash of champag ne wakes him up for round 8 or 9. Then we find the Old Age Outlaws have Steiner crucified in the back in his boxers, where Funk cleans his mouth out with soap. For real. And Steiner had cowboy boots on. Bret couldn't be bothered to wear his tights, so he's in jorts and an nWo shirt. Made sense for a hardcore match, but not for a title match against Kevin Nash.
They're having a real match. It's no KOTR 94 or SS 95, though. But considering Bret's brain was swollen and rattling around in his skull, and Nash was at the height of laziness, it isn't bad at all. My guess is that this will probably end up being one of the better Nitro main events of the year. Nash grabs a chair, and Arn (in ref shirt) DRILLS Nash in the back with a pipe. While Bret and Arn yak, Sid comes out. AWFUL bit boot to chair, chair to face spot. Oh man. Sid kicked it as soft as he could, Bret had a delayed reaction. The cage lowers, Sid hits a choke slam and powerbomb on Bret (which was uncomfortable knowing the condition he was in), and Arn counts to 4 to give Sid the win, I guess. Funk comes down with a flaming branding iron and brands Nash on the gut.
Not a bad show. Much more focused than the prior week. I just don't know why Russo thought a power struggle between Kevin Nash and Terry Funk/Arn Anderson/Larry Zbyszko, and Paul Orndorff would make people want to watch Nitro of Raw. It doesn't even make sense since Russo was always about getting rid of the old guys and giving the spotlight to young guys, even if they weren't ready at all for it. I don't think Russo was name dropped even once, David Flair was only in one segment. But the trade off was Jeff Jarrett in 3 matches and 6-7 other segments through out the show.
TLDR: Nitro wasn't bad.
TLDR: Nitro wasn't bad.
Show starts off with a recap of the nWo shenanigans with Double A over the past week. Terry Funk now has a team of other old dudes. Terry Funk, Arn Anderson, Larry Zbyszko, and Paul Orndorff. We are 6 days away from Souled Out. Most of the arena is weirdly dark, so I imagine that means that no one in Buffalo gave a shit about WCW.
Dean Malenko/Saturn vs Konnan/Kidman. Shane Douglas on commentary. Shane immediately talks about the script and cues and whatnot. They brawl for a bit and then Crowbar and David Flair came out. Apparently this was a triple threat match for the tag belts. I wish Kidman would have left with The Radicalz. Weapons are being used with no call for a DQ. Saturn and Malenko brawl with Rey on the floor, then Perry darts into the crowd. Oh shit, the merchandise table. Rey is put on the table and Saturn jumps off the balcony, CRUSHING little Rey. Brain says it was at least 60 or 70 feet in the air. David Flair pops up OUTTA NOWHERE and pins Saturn. I guess it was a falls count anywhere match, as well.
Tony tells us this is normally the time when they'd give us the run down of the show, but Commissioner Funk is just going to "book it on the fly", and that they'll know what's going on when we know what's going on. We will see an interview with Stevie Ray, though. Also, a face to face meeting between DDP and Buff. If either man strikes the other in the 5 minutes allotted to their segment, they will be fined $50,000.
TO THE BACK. nWo limo. It's Scotty's birthday, apparently. Nash got him a limo of yaks. April Hunter and Major Guns are the only ones I recognize. Now the Old Horsemen are watching it, disgusted no doubt because their dicks don't work anymore. Rey is being put into an ambulance. He looks like he's having a seizure, but I guess he was just fighting them. Scotty gets the yaks to bounce around. He's going to fuck them like Mean Gene.
Oklahoma is out for a PROMO PROMO PROMO! Note, they changed the the ramp so people wouldn't trip on it anymore. Typical barefoot and pregnant promo. "Would Ralph have let Alice get into a wrasslin ring and wrassle a man?" So not only is Ed doing a parody of JR, but he's also redoing the Jarrett/Chyna storyline at the same time. An open challenge to any woman who can be ol' Oklahoma. Asya accepts. Of course, a JR knock off against a Chyna knock off in a Jarret/Chyna storyline knock off. It all makes so much sense. After some brawling with Asya slamming OK on the floor, OK hits her with the BBQ bottle and Madusa strolls out. Wearing a blue wig and outfit with blue boas sewn in. Oklahoma breaks a broom over her. "Now she has no way to get home", says Brain.
TO THE BACK. Funk and his men are walking around, looking old and grumpy. Bret, Kev, and Jarrett are trying to check up on Scotty. He only does 2-3 at a time. Kevin peeks in, likes what he sees, and then they walk off. This is followed by Slim Jim (with Macho in a straight jacket) and AOL 5.0 commercials.
Funk, Arn, Larry, and Mr. Wonderful hobble out. The ramp is back to normal. That's weird. I guess they covered it up so the women could come out in heels. All 3 of his buddies were unemployed. THE OLD AGE OUTLAWS! That's the official name. I wonder why Arn never got rid of the tuft of hair in the front. It's been the only think up there since the mid 80s, you'd think he'd have come to terms with baldness by now. Larry points out that the millennium doesn't really start until 2001, so there is no new millennium or new world order. Paul Orndorff points out the Power Plant dudes. I honestly can't understand most of what he is saying. Like, every 3-4 words I can understand. I guess the nWo are sick of trying to figure out what the fuck Paul was trying to say. The nWo and associated yaks come out. This is great as the main angle of the company. Nash makes fun of Funk's Target outfit. Funk says fuck this shit, I'm making matches. Double J is now in 3 matches tonight. A wrassle match, a Bunkhouse Brawl, and a cage match. Every match will be against a friend of Funk. When asking if Larry would be one of his opponents, Jeff says he would have to apologize because "I'm gonna stretch his ass like it's never been stretched before." Yep. He said that. Terry Funk is straight up embarrassing. It's like when your grandpa talks a bit too much at a family gathering. He rambles, fucks up his lines, repeats them, fucks them up again, then rambles some more. Chris Benoit will be the special ref for all 3 matches. And now he's putting Bret in a title match against Kevin Nash! They're like brothers, they'd never fight. If they take it easy on each other, they will be suspended for a year without pay and Bret will be stripped of the belt. Nash, unlike Funk, saved his money, and he's about 6 hours away from getting his correspondence in gynecology, so he's not worried about taking a year off. Neither is Bret. "You're gonna lose the belt Bret." "I don't care about this belt." Steiner grabs the mic and the censors do a prolonged beep the entire time he was speaking.
TO THE BACK. Old dudes are discussing..stuff. Arn is sent on an errand. Buff is on his way to the arena. DDP is on his way. DDP is in black, Buff is in white. Arn is walking out to a limo. It was Kim. Looking hot as fuck.
Mene Gene conducts an interview with Buff and DDP. I hope he fucked the shit out of that yak after Thunder. Mene Gene fucks up and says "He is the stuff.......He is DDP." There is a 5 minute clock. DDP tells Gene to step off, and he does. So now it is just Buff and DDP. "How's your wife." OHHHHH. "We're just friends. I'm a great listener." Lol. Now DDP has the small dick. And then he calls Buff a jack off. "Don't go there." "I'm there." Buff was feeding Kim drinks one night after a show. DDP told Buff they were having problems, and then Buff tries to fuck Kim. Kim is watching this backstage. I think Buff admitted it, and then took it back. "Why the hell should I trust you?" "Why the hell shouldn't you?" Now they're talking about Kim's birthmark. Buff's definitely seen that, but so have all the boys in the back. Buff gets decked. Buff brought a retractable baton with him. The fuck? He's the face here? So, he's innocent, but brought a retractable police baton with him? That seems a bit extreme. Segment ends with Buff beating on DDP with his police baton.
TO THE BACK. nWo are brainstorming. Bret and Kevin start arguing, because Bret says he knows he can beat him, he has before. So now they're going to have a match for realises. Arn's bros show up, apparently.
Chris Benoit is out to ref the first match of Double J's series. I don't remember this theme at all. However, I don't think Jarrett's is even a Jimmy Hart version of Cowboy. Pretty sure it is the song without the lyrics. The Old Age Outlaws come out to introduce the first opponent. Jeff Jarrett vs.....GEORGE THE ANIMAL STEEL! Well, at least it made sense for WCW to bring in 70s/80s WWF guys for their show in Buffalo. You would think that WCW would bring in Georgia territory legends or something for a show in New York. Apparently, The Animal was one of the first hardcore wrestlers. Jarrett tries to get his hands up, but somehow George manages to crack him right in the dome every time. Turnbuckle eating. This distracts George enough to allow for a guitar shot, but Arn is right there to hit a SPINEBUSTER, giving George Steel the win. In 2012.
TO THE BACK. Steiner is exiting the locker room and getting some more yaks in, while Bret and Nash get taped up for their match. JJ suggests they get rid of Bret. Steiner apparently agrees, but he's too busy fucking yaks to be there to say it. The Old Age Outlaws are hanging out with George. Arn is sent on another errand.
Mean Gene's guest at this time is none other than Stevie Ray. He almost breaks his ankle on the ramp. Stevie says that none of the announcers can do their jobs. Fruit booties is muted. 7 years ago, Harlem Heat was held down. Some reference to Bruno Margley (?) shoes and what happened to the last person wearing them out. I don't really get the reference. But apparently Booker is dressing too nice to be from the hood anymore was the main idea. CRACKA JACK FRUIT BOOTY! Match is signed for Souled Out.
TO THE BACK. Jeff is now convincing Bret that Nash is the problem. Arn is still waiting outside.
Jeff Jarret vs.....TITO SANTANA! I'm ok with this. I'd be ok with Tito getting an IC title run tomorrow. Pretty big pop for him, too. He looks like he hadn't aged at all since 1992. Although he is wearing the Matador outfit, but in black at least. Oh, good. Funk is on commentary. Funk says the nWo are a bunch of roid heads. Not steroids, though. Hemorrhoids in between their heads. Jeff is wearing a Titans jersey and heeling on the Buffalo Bills that are at ringside. This is actually hilarious. This is a Dungeon match. Which means pinfalls, submissions, or going to the outside will end the match. Except at Souled Out, the ring will have no ropes. This is..not as good as I'd hoped. They aren't even reading the same book. Benoit won't count the pin, Larry is on one side of the ring, dude from the Bills on the other side of the ring, and Mr. Wonderful hits a giant piledriver. Tito gets the win after a fast count. Clearly, WWE faces are taking their cues from WCW 2000 faces. Cheating sumbitches.
TO THE BACK. Tank is walking around. He's going to fuck someone up. He was fined $15,000 for punching Doug Dillinger.
Tank is now trying to cut a promo in the ring. He is so uncomfortable on the mic. But he's hilarious. Duck Body Doug Dillinger. Huckleberry Flynn. He's going to offer Doug a free shot. "Get that fat duck ass out here." Doug goes in alone. Doug did punch him, right in the face, but then was taken down. Security immediately jumps Tank and hand cuffs him. Jerry Flynn comes out and kicks Tank in the head while he's handcuffed.
TO THE BACK. Jeff is walking around talking to himself. Arn's last bro shows up. SUPAFLY! Bret is still prepping. Nash is stretching like a mother fucker. Chris Benoit is laying on the floor in the back.
Jeff Jarrett vs Superfly Jimmy Snuka in a STEEL CAGE MATCH, playa. He freely admits to taking Benoit out. Snuka has looked so ancient for 15 years now. Jeff gets the early jump on Snuka. Benoit makes his way out anyway. Jarrett won't let Benoit in the cage. Bobby is talking about how great of a champion Jeff is, to fight all these odds that have been stacked against him. And he's right. The authority figure books him in 3 matches with unknown opponents, with his PPV opponent as the ref in all of the matches, and screws him out of every match even when he would have won. Benoit gets in, they fight, Larry and Paul come in. Snuka climbs to the top of one side of the cage, Benoit to the other, and they both hit their moves. Which makes so much sense that they had Saturn dive off the balcony in the very first match when they were going to have Snuka and Benoit diving off the cage later. Jarrett was injured in this match.
TO THE BACK. Nash and Hart make their way to the ring. Steiner is still crushing yaks, but he's getting tired. A splash of champag ne wakes him up for round 8 or 9. Then we find the Old Age Outlaws have Steiner crucified in the back in his boxers, where Funk cleans his mouth out with soap. For real. And Steiner had cowboy boots on. Bret couldn't be bothered to wear his tights, so he's in jorts and an nWo shirt. Made sense for a hardcore match, but not for a title match against Kevin Nash.
They're having a real match. It's no KOTR 94 or SS 95, though. But considering Bret's brain was swollen and rattling around in his skull, and Nash was at the height of laziness, it isn't bad at all. My guess is that this will probably end up being one of the better Nitro main events of the year. Nash grabs a chair, and Arn (in ref shirt) DRILLS Nash in the back with a pipe. While Bret and Arn yak, Sid comes out. AWFUL bit boot to chair, chair to face spot. Oh man. Sid kicked it as soft as he could, Bret had a delayed reaction. The cage lowers, Sid hits a choke slam and powerbomb on Bret (which was uncomfortable knowing the condition he was in), and Arn counts to 4 to give Sid the win, I guess. Funk comes down with a flaming branding iron and brands Nash on the gut.
Not a bad show. Much more focused than the prior week. I just don't know why Russo thought a power struggle between Kevin Nash and Terry Funk/Arn Anderson/Larry Zbyszko, and Paul Orndorff would make people want to watch Nitro of Raw. It doesn't even make sense since Russo was always about getting rid of the old guys and giving the spotlight to young guys, even if they weren't ready at all for it. I don't think Russo was name dropped even once, David Flair was only in one segment. But the trade off was Jeff Jarrett in 3 matches and 6-7 other segments through out the show.
TLDR: Nitro wasn't bad.
*Sheds a tear*