That is how I use OKC. It is my secondary source of options.
I prefer and do fine with social interactions and meet plenty of girls while out. OKC is just to see if I happen to find a cool girl that may be a fun date.
-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!
- Thread starter AlimNassor
- Start date
- Status
I prefer and do fine with social interactions and meet plenty of girls while out. OKC is just to see if I happen to find a cool girl that may be a fun date.
ElectricBlue187
Member
I find it pretty easy to tell which profile the girl is from the cbd picture.
Depends on the message. The last successful opening message I had did not contain a question. If the woman is slightly interested in you, she should be able to build upon what you wrote.
NobleGundam
Banned
All Hope for you is not lost.Do you ever think women expectations on these dating sites are a bit to high and unrealistic?
I mean, I just can't shake the feeling that there expecting this:
with some Law or Medical degree
And are getting this instead:
with some bachelors in business.
I feel that why I'm probably not getting any success. To many women are expecting good looking versace models with high paying incomes, while instead they get average joes like me who is still living with his parents.
velvet_nitemare
Member
a question makes it easier for her to respond, and you want to make it easy for her to respond. throw in a question.
Deadly Cyclone
Pride of Iowa State
My first date in years done. Went excellent! We had coffee and ended up talking for an hour and a half. Craziest thing is she went to my high school and graduated two years ahead of me and we had no idea.
Got her number and will be seeing her again.
Got her number and will be seeing her again.
Was this the same woman who house you went to?
Well, I made a slight mistake. I was speaking to this girl, and her profile said she was a fluent in German and decent in French. When we were messaging each other, her English was poor. So, I asked if English was her secondary or tertiary language...it was her primary language. Whoops!
Yeah it was. I kind of drank some coffee before hand without realizing it makes me more anxious in new situations. Oh well, live you learn.
She was nice though so its all good. At least she had the decency to message back. I feel like saying to her its probably a bad idea letting people come to your house before you know them but I don't want her to take it the wrong way.
When I read you were gong to her house, I expected you to get some of your mojo going on and possibly make a bastard.
I'm still learning the hoops of dating. Every date so far had me feel some form of anxiety, even though none of my dates has ever been truly disastrous.
I'm a lot more comfortable at my house. I'm still learning the hoops to dating too I guess.
Just sex is easier for some reason. She told me she wanted to take it slow from the start though.
Who isn't more comfortable at their own home? Also, who came up with the idea of going to her house in the first place?
Because that in itself, is really awkward for a first meeting. I can understand maybe if it was after dinner or something. That, or there was specific discussions about hooking up. Either way I think you dodged a bullet.
Maddocks
Member
my advice would be to not treat it like a date, treat it as you would hanging out with friends or buddies. everytime I treated a date like a date it always added pressure for no reason because you have to be on your best behavior.
when you treat it like just hanging out, you lose that pressure and find it more relaxing and free.
NobleGundam
Banned
Bravo, CycloneMy first date in years done. Went excellent! We had coffee and ended up talking for an hour and a half. Craziest thing is she went to my high school and graduated two years ahead of me and we had no idea.
Got her number and will be seeing her again.
Yeah, you're probably right. Her roommate was there too so it was kind of um, funny. He just sat there with his dog on his lap. It was pretty odd.
Yea, I tried to do that and then when she told me her roommate was going to be there I got a little nervous for some reason.
The girl I was seeing before all this keeps calling me. I don't know what to do about her, shes been calling me this past week and I just got off the phone with her. I said to her you want to be with me now don't you and she said maybe. I feel like saying why the hell didn't you want to be with me before dammit.
She loves me, I don't know if I love her though but she accepted all of my insecurities pretty easily so I don't really know what to do.
Freezie KO
Banned
So this girl I was chatting with dropped off after saying she was inundated with work and would have to take a rain check on a date. I really thought we'd hit it off well, so I sent a hail mary message on Thursday. It just said, "If you're still interested, I'd love to grab a drink at X. I think we'd really hit it off. If not, I won't bother you with another message. Have a good one."
Got a reply saying how she did have intentions to reply, but is buried with work. And then went on to say how she can't even commit time to dating, not to mention friends. Then said I'd be better off looking elsewhere, and she wished me luck.
I'm not sure if that feels better or worse than if I didn't get a reply.
And I'm trying to focus on other women, but I'm so over trying to have a conversation with this other woman who keeps giving me two sentence replies to work off of. If you're so uninterested in conversation, just save me the effort and don't reply.
Got a reply saying how she did have intentions to reply, but is buried with work. And then went on to say how she can't even commit time to dating, not to mention friends. Then said I'd be better off looking elsewhere, and she wished me luck.
I'm not sure if that feels better or worse than if I didn't get a reply.
And I'm trying to focus on other women, but I'm so over trying to have a conversation with this other woman who keeps giving me two sentence replies to work off of. If you're so uninterested in conversation, just save me the effort and don't reply.
False Witness
Member
There is this one girl in the blind date section whose profile I can't seem to find anywhere. Then again, I suppose she could be from out of town or something.
You created a date or scheduled one with a girl who had set one up?
Safe dating rule... If a girl is really interested, it won't matter if she's working 4 jobs, she'll make time to see some guy she's into. Anything else is just an excuse.
We all have those we are to "busy" to see, yet when the right girl calls us up we flush all our plans down the drain to go see her.
Freezie KO
Banned
Yeah, feels bad, man. Dunno why she even bothered to reply.
johnny_park
Member
Hung out with the girl I've been talking to. She's 11 yrs younger and has a lot of tattoos (double sleeved and others scattered elsewhere). I had fun. I guess I'll see where this goes. We made tentative plans for next weekend. I'm going to attempt to cook her dinner.
I have female friends that have said they are too busy and actually meant it. It all depends on what someone's primary focus is, and a lot of people out there are really career focused.
Obviously not always the case though, probably less often than not
Perspicacity
Banned
Crawling around on the site just now I discovered something - I would have far more compatible matches who I was attracted to if I were a lesbian or a bisexual gal. I have no idea how this information can be used.
Al-ibn Kermit
Junior Member
It could be their way of saying "shut up and ask me out".
Yup. Last Friday I dated a chick who was a drug dealer, and got expelled from High School for slitting a girls throat. She also tried to slit her abusive baby daddy's throat. She also went on about how she was a borderline bisexual, which I would've preferred over everything else that night. Lol.
She told me all this within the 1st 35mins of meeting her. She was hot, but smelled like weed and cigarettes, actually she smelled like something worse than cigarettes. Not sure what she was smoking.
Also her mom was a crazy dog breeder, who was never sober. When at her condo she told me how she had "a bunch of bitches lined up" for this fucking human sized Pitbull they had. The dog was nice to me, but they told me to stay away from it, since it like bit one of her friends earlier that day.
Anyway, yeah..
EDIT: I guess technically it wasn't blind, since we texted and stuff. Plus I had to call her for directions like 4 times, cause GPSs go apeshit in Central Florida. Yeah she had no car, which wasn't an issue to me.
Also while eating at Applebee's, she kept doing this motion as if she was about to duck under the table. I asked, "see someone you know?", and she said something about her seeing someone she knew on this side of town wouldn't be good. She said it'd result in a fight of some sort, a that there was a shootout outside some club because of such a situation...
Yup, not seeing her again.
Now that's a date!
Man, that's even worse than one woman I went out with. On the first date, she told me all of this: She had an abortion in high school, her ex was dating her mother, she was a Wicca who practiced the black arts to get revenge on her exes. Then later that night, she asked me to be her BF. I chose to bail out.
Yup. At the end of our date. She told me how she was free all next week. And told me to text her.
I got home the same night, wished her a good night, and deleted her number.
Perspicacity
Banned
You took her to Applebee's? She certainly dodged a bullet.
Seriously. Shoulda sprung for sizzlers
Hmm I log into my LinkedIn account for the first time in ages and I see that someone from a certain network checked out my profile. I then see that one of the potential people is a girl I went out on a date with. She was not interested in me but I found it unusual she checked out my LinkedIn profile. I don't have my full name on it but there is enough info to find me. I am not weirded out but it did make me raise my eyebrow.
It was the only place open at the time. She wanted to go clubbing afterwards, but I told her I had work early tomorrow. Lol.
You win sir. That's an incredible story haha.
I broke up with my girlfriend of almost 6 months finally yesterday, but I keep feeling shitty about it. I have a date hopefully tonight with a different girl from OKC, and have been texting another girl as well from the site.
I guess I just feel shitty because my ex is a super awesome and nice girl, but I just knew she wasn't the one for me. It's easier to break it off with someone who's got issues and you don't feel much remorse, but here I do.
Wait...you want us to critique
I had the same problem with the last girl I dated. Awesome person, but just not the right one for me. I had a hell of a time breaking up with her, but she took it well and we're actually good friends now. It's a little bizarre if I think about it too hard, but it's turned out pretty great. I think we're better for each other as friends than we were as boyfriend/girlfriend.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I'm having a Skype conversation with a girl I'm not super interested in. I guess it's good practice?
Don't.... don't use a person as a self-esteem booster or "practice".
Maddocks
Member
girls do it to guys all the time though.
Messypandas
Member
time to skittle-addle
How else are you ever supposed to get better in social interactions then? There is nothing wrong with it as long as the other person enjoys it.
By being in social situations. Leading someone on is a dick move.
I've done it in the past and it's ended in some pretty awkward situations. Casual flirting for practice is fine, but this guy is Skype chatting with a girl he met on a dating site. How the hell do you explain that without lying to her?
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I enjoyed our ~90 minute conversation. She was nice, I just haven't found anything particularly special about her. It was nice to talk to a woman on OkCupid for once without feeling the need to impress them. I felt relaxed and was able to have fun with it. I certainly wasn't using her as a self-esteem booster.
Talking to someone is leading them on? I haven't dismissed her entirely, she just didn't come off as very interesting from her profile.
- Status
Similar threads
- Locked