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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!
- Thread starter AlimNassor
- Start date
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NobleGundam
Banned
One day just chat abit so she's still into you.
And when you feel that she's interested the follow day(s) just ask her out again and arrange another date :]
Things are finally starting to pick up a little bit for me. I made a profile at the beginning of the month and messaged several girls with no response, so I decided to revamp my profile and try to make it more funny and lighthearted. That was the intention with my original profile too, but I realized it had more of a "this online dating stuff is dumb" undertone to it.
After remaking my profile I got my first reply from a girl today. She said that a particular part of my profile made her laugh out loud, and she went on to write a big paragraph of information about herself. That surprised me since my message to her was literally just a one-sentence question.
I've also had 2 girls message me saying that my profile made them laugh, as well as a random message from a surprisingly attractive girl (but she lives too far away). I'm not getting my hopes up since I know online dating is really hit-or-miss, but it's at least encouraging.
After remaking my profile I got my first reply from a girl today. She said that a particular part of my profile made her laugh out loud, and she went on to write a big paragraph of information about herself. That surprised me since my message to her was literally just a one-sentence question.
I've also had 2 girls message me saying that my profile made them laugh, as well as a random message from a surprisingly attractive girl (but she lives too far away). I'm not getting my hopes up since I know online dating is really hit-or-miss, but it's at least encouraging.
WascallyWabbit
Member
Been messaging about one girl per week, trying to think of something funny and non-generic to say. They visit my profile, never answer backit is starting to become a quite shitty experience, really.
That's really not a lot, in fact, that's hardly any. You should try sending more messages
I usually ask at the end of the date. Someone usually says "it was nice meeting you, I had fun" then I'll just say "let's do it again sometime" or something along those lines.
Not to be mean but it sounds like she wasn't that interested if she just left after the movie, unless she had some reason why she had to leave. Could be wrong though.
The_Inquisitor
Member
So my second date may be a keeper. We basically spent a large chunk of the weekend hanging out after our Thursday date and are meeting up tonight. There's something about her that drives me crazy in a good way. Even cancelled my date with a third girl Sunday to spend more time with her.
Deadly Cyclone
Pride of Iowa State
I barely had to ask for the second date with the girl I'm doing dates with now, I said we should do something again and she perked right up with availability. The whole thing is odd though because she still seems a bit distant even after 3 dates.
Not like I have other options though, so I'm still going with the flow.
Not like I have other options though, so I'm still going with the flow.
So I was supposed to have a rain check date with this girl last night from last week. She was going to flake again, but I wasn't taking no for an answer, or at least I wanted to know what she was so scared of. Turns out she was using a fake profile with some other girls pics.
I've now come to the conclusion if I start to text a girl or talk on the phone, she must add me on facebook after 2 or 3 days of texting/talking. I'm not wasting 2 weeks again on a giant self conscious liar. I was nice about the whole thing, told her she's still cute when she sent me a real pic(which she was), but compared to the pics she had on the profile it was a huge downgrade. Plus I'm not out to make a relationship with someone who isn't comfortable with themselves already to a certain extent.
So I reactivate my OKC again last night and 2 girls message ME that are cute. With long several paragraph's of talking. That's a first for me. I get messages from decent and not so cute chicks, but this was a welcome surprise. I changed my pics on there, or really added a few more in the hopes it shows I'm confident with what I look like.
I'm still texting one girl who I did add to facebook too. Aside from OKC I have been talking to a lot of women at my new job and hitting on them lightly.
I've now come to the conclusion if I start to text a girl or talk on the phone, she must add me on facebook after 2 or 3 days of texting/talking. I'm not wasting 2 weeks again on a giant self conscious liar. I was nice about the whole thing, told her she's still cute when she sent me a real pic(which she was), but compared to the pics she had on the profile it was a huge downgrade. Plus I'm not out to make a relationship with someone who isn't comfortable with themselves already to a certain extent.
So I reactivate my OKC again last night and 2 girls message ME that are cute. With long several paragraph's of talking. That's a first for me. I get messages from decent and not so cute chicks, but this was a welcome surprise. I changed my pics on there, or really added a few more in the hopes it shows I'm confident with what I look like.
I'm still texting one girl who I did add to facebook too. Aside from OKC I have been talking to a lot of women at my new job and hitting on them lightly.
Liu Kang Baking A Pie
Member
I like that zlatko's been a legit dating success story here. It happens, dudes.
Future PhaZe
Member
It's really unattractive when people I barely know try to get me to accept a FR on facebook...its not all that serious, but I'd suggest against it.
Well things have come to a standstill with that girl who gave me that awkward first kiss. I texted her a day later and she didn't respond after talking to me later after that date. Haven't bothered sending her another, and don't really care to.
Mainly, because I've hit it off with the other girl I've been dating for 3 weeks. We spent a good portion of the weekend together. The sex is amazing, and we've already planned to see each other a few more times this week. She wants me to buy NHL 13 so we can play together. Will probably be disabling my account at some point this week.
3rd success story for me from this site in about 6 months.
Mainly, because I've hit it off with the other girl I've been dating for 3 weeks. We spent a good portion of the weekend together. The sex is amazing, and we've already planned to see each other a few more times this week. She wants me to buy NHL 13 so we can play together. Will probably be disabling my account at some point this week.
3rd success story for me from this site in about 6 months.
WascallyWabbit
Member
Go fuck yourself
but seriously, that's awesome, so jelly right now. If I could get a girl who played NBA 2K with me, i'd marry her.
Yeah I mean a 5 month relationship is definitely something that makes me have some confidence in using the website. I've harped on here several times that it's a LOT of grinding and work for guys, but it can pan out.
I haven't had an issue with even 1 girl that I've talked to on OKC after a while wanting to get on each other's facebooks. Most are all for it, because it allows them to creep you a little more to ease into you. It just depends on the person.
Really just watch out for chicks who after a week or so of conversing aren't up to the idea of hanging out and not being open on the reason. This is the third time I think in my life I've had a girl use fake pictures for something while flirting with me. I keep thinking I'll get better at catching them early on, but I don't want to be a pushy dick with trust issues.
ElectricBlue187
Member
you don't get the "soandso chose you!" emails?
Deadly Cyclone
Pride of Iowa State
Well, not sure my thing is going to work out. Got 3 dates out of it but she really hasn't shown much interest and now she's not writing/calling back. Damn, liked her too. My first actual date from the site in a year, a bit disappointing if it takes another year to get another person.
EDIT: Well, not completely dead yet. She's really up in the air because of her job situation.
EDIT: Well, not completely dead yet. She's really up in the air because of her job situation.
Yeah, that's what I felt too because the same feeling hit me after another outing and that girl I have not contacted at all. But after I got home I text her that I enjoyed seeing her, and she replied with the same. Now we're texting at the same rate as before the first date, so picking my moment to ask for the second date, but the impetus to meet feels weaker now. Gah.
If she replied like that you shouldn't need to wait for a moment in my opinion. Do it right now. Just say "so when do I get to see you again?"
Zoramon089
Banned
What's the general take on
1. Women much older as fwb (I'm 23, this woman is 30) and
2. Women who say they're into x race (in this case, some girl said she's attracted to black guys and we're sort of thinking of a fwb thing as well)
Do those things kind of end badly? I've only been texted them. Haven't really met with either of them yet and it's really just started...
1. Women much older as fwb (I'm 23, this woman is 30) and
2. Women who say they're into x race (in this case, some girl said she's attracted to black guys and we're sort of thinking of a fwb thing as well)
Do those things kind of end badly? I've only been texted them. Haven't really met with either of them yet and it's really just started...
Red_taiyaki
Member
Never encountered any of those two types. To me, any girl who says they only date X is extremely close-minded and not worth my time so I would personally never bother. If you meet her "qualifications" though, all the more power to you being FWB. Just be aware that there's more than likely some issues in her somewhere.(granted, we ALL have issues)
I guess in the end it comes down to what you're looking for ;p.
How bad could FWB end? As long as you don't get attached it sounds like a good time to me.
Zoramon089
Banned
I don't think I'll get attached but the 30 year old is like...she just moved back home with her parents and stuff. And acts a bit childish. But who knows
Done it a few times, some were one night stands, others fuck buddies .
It's up to your discretion. Remember that sex releases all sorts of chemicals that make your brain want to trust in and fall in love with the person you're fucking, and it's an additive process. Mind your emotions and circumstances when you're sleeping with someone you feel isn't good for you.
You mean, sending more messages to the same person? It sounds a little tad weird to me: they visit my profile afterwards, which means that they have readed my message and got curious about its writter. But they simply do not reply, which is why I think that they got no interest in me (sees profile, pass).
Now if you mean about sending more messages to different girls, well, I don't have quite a wide array for options either (girls in Madrid of at least more than 75% compatibility).
Buckethead
Banned
Met a woman 12 years older than me. It was cool we learned a lot from one another.
Zoramon089
Banned
I actually had it happen that I sent one girl a message, she apparently visited, didn't respond so later (like a week or so) I sent her another one and then she was like "Oh wow, I don't know how I missed you. I thought I responded. Blah blah" so I guess they sometimes miss them...as long as you don't go overboard
Good call! Will try to re-message some of my older contacts and see what happens
still, I am pretty sceptikal about the utility of okcupid, seeing how the numbers are stacked against men and my own personal experience :SYeah, just keep talking to her. And if she continues to show interest, don't be afraid to try to set something up.
Red_taiyaki
Member
Yah just keep talking to her. This is just what I do, but from experience I've discovered that movies don't really make a great first date as you don't get enough time to talk one-on-one with each other. They're better for maybe a second or fourth? Hopefully your second one will be better than the first
. G/l!Trying to figure out where to go on a first date. What is GAF's opinion on this? It's one of my favorite places in town. Patio bar with good beer and wine selection with tons of benches and a chill DJ, everything is outside. The place has five or six gourmet food trucks in a ring around it with a varied selection. Plus it's in the shadow of downtown so the view is great and we are having awesome weather right now. My concern is it might be too casual since the only bathrooms are port o potties, there might be an actual girls bathroom though not really sure about that.
WascallyWabbit
Member
that sounds awesome.
Red_taiyaki
Member
Sounds good.
Perspicacity
Banned
That sounds great. There's no such thing as "too casual" for a first date
electricshake
Member
While I agree it does sound pretty cool, you may want to warn her about the bathroom situation just so it's not a total surprise when she gets there.
Well I have been having some success with getting replies back and such but I am at a loss to how to keep the conversation going with this one girl. We've been chatting for a a week now and I'm struggling to keep the conversation alive. I ask her something and then she'll respond with 1-2 sentences and that's it. Do any of you guys have any suggestions on how I can keep the conversation alive? I think she's really nice and we have similar tastes so I really want to keep it going.
The_Inquisitor
Member
Never felt so crazy for a girl before in my life. She's coming over to my place after we're both done with work, and we're going to bake some cupcakes. We're then going to chill out and she is spending the night.
I am also going to her place this Sunday for a superbowl party this upcoming sunday. I also took her to a poker night with my friends last Friday and we had a good time.
I am afraid we may be going a little fast. But damn the attraction is amazing.
I am also going to her place this Sunday for a superbowl party this upcoming sunday. I also took her to a poker night with my friends last Friday and we had a good time.
I am afraid we may be going a little fast. But damn the attraction is amazing.
Red_taiyaki
Member
Sounds awesome bro. I wish you luck!
For one, if you haven't gotten her number already, you should really get her number. For two, you need to ask her out already before she gets bored of you. Messaging is fun for 2 shakes of a lamb's tail, but if you want anything to progress further an actual outing is needed.
The_Inquisitor
Member
We've been hanging out/talking like crazy for 4-5 straight days. It's insane.
She made the comment that it feels like we've known each other for years. I would think she's crazy except I kind of feel the same way. When I hold her in my arms, I don't think I have ever felt peace like this before. She also gives awesome back massages, so I have a winner here.
Maddocks
Member
A connection is a connection, don't worry about speed and just be comfortable. Like in basketball, things break down when you start thinking. Just go with it and flow.
I tried asking her out and she said she wan't comfortable with meeting suddenly so I eased off (and that put a damper in my plans to get her number as well). I might try and ask for her number again in a couple of days.
Maddocks
Member
couple of days? just do it now. "Can I get your number so we can talk offsite?" if she gives a great reason then understand and continue. If she flat out says,"No" then bail out and try with a new girl.
You can try to get her number but I don't think it's going to do you any good, sounds like she's already regulated you to the "I Don't Want To Date This Guy" pile. I would move on and keep messaging elsewhere.
Bah I was afraid of this. I'll just ask now and if I get shot down without a decent reason I'm gonna move on. Thanks for the help guys.
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