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[rugioh]

This seems like a really stupid question, but how important is it to initiate physical contact on the first meetup? I was texting a pretty cool person for about a week before we met up(would've been earlier but some other things came up so we rescheduled.) Everything went well, no awkward pauses, conversation flowed and we had a lot of laughs.. I enjoyed it. We hugged when we first met each other but when we left I didn't really know what to do we just said our goodbyes and walked away without a hug or anything, but she smiled and insisted that I keep texting her. We're still texting and we're going to meet up saturday so everything seems like its still going okay... if she didn't like me she would've stopped talking to me by now.. right? For some reason I feel like I might fall into platonic territory if I don't make an effort to initiate contact. I think my mind is playing tricks on me help me GAF ;_;

 

[dralla]

This seems like a really stupid question, but how important is it to initiate physical contact on the first meetup? I was texting a pretty cool person for about a week before we met up(would've been earlier but some other things came up so we rescheduled.) Everything went well, no awkward pauses, conversation flowed and we had a lot of laughs.. I enjoyed it. We hugged when we first met each other but when we left I didn't really know what to do we just said our goodbyes and walked away without a hug or anything, but she smiled and insisted that I keep texting her. We're still texting and we're going to meet up saturday so everything seems like its still going okay... if she didn't like me she would've stopped talking to me by now.. right? For some reason I feel like I might fall into platonic territory if I don't make an effort to initiate contact. I think my mind is playing tricks on me help me GAF ;_;

Sounds like it went well, no need to overthink things. I generally look at the first meeting as a friendly meet up, just to see if there's attraction and just get a feel for the other person. The second meet up is more a traditional 'date' and where it will get a little more intimate if you wanna go that route. Just be playful, even make flirty comments, touch her from time to time, things like that, if she reciprocates, you're good to go.

--

ok so last night, I may or may not have sexted with suicide girl. the only reason why is because she lives too far away and I know we could never really date. just having some innocent fun

 

[WascallyWabbit]

This seems like a really stupid question, but how important is it to initiate physical contact on the first meetup? I was texting a pretty cool person for about a week before we met up(would've been earlier but some other things came up so we rescheduled.) Everything went well, no awkward pauses, conversation flowed and we had a lot of laughs.. I enjoyed it. We hugged when we first met each other but when we left I didn't really know what to do we just said our goodbyes and walked away without a hug or anything, but she smiled and insisted that I keep texting her. We're still texting and we're going to meet up saturday so everything seems like its still going okay... if she didn't like me she would've stopped talking to me by now.. right? For some reason I feel like I might fall into platonic territory if I don't make an effort to initiate contact. I think my mind is playing tricks on me help me GAF ;_;

Your mind IS playing tricks on you, but make sure you give her a nice hug when you see her again and for future reference: you should at least hug the gal when you leave her after the first meet.

ok so last night, I may or may not have sexted with suicide girl. the only reason why is because she lives too far away and I know we could never really date. just having some innocent fun

I doubt anything you do with this one classifies as "innocent", but enjoy!

 

[Cow Mengde]

that moment when you find out your ex is on OKCupid...

...and of course it says "Y'all got issues"

well no shit, Sherlock!

Yeah, the match thing is surprisingly accurate for what it's worth. I know right away a low match has traits I can't stand.

 

[-PXG-]

Well.. This sucks.. I probably won't date someone so young again. I've been dating a 20 year old form POF for about a month and some time now. She sends me a text one night saying she deleted her account. I planned on doing the same but forgot about it. Skip to last night she ends up breaking up with me claiming I'm cheating on her and talking to other people. I find out it's over my account being still active( her sister has it too). I don't really know what to do, I can't really reason with her right now cause she is acting so hurt and just angry. I would never cheat anyone and just totally forgot about using the site but she won't listen. I've tried calling and explaining to her and all that and she won't hear it. What do I do? Did I just dodge a bullet cause she obviously has some issues, but she was an awesome girl at the same time =/

You may have dodged a bullet. I wouldn't try contacting her again. If you really do like her, wait for her to cool off and for her to initiate contact with you. Maybe you can work something out. If she never does, oh well. Move on.

About two weeks ago, due to circumstances I won't go into here, I found myself super depressed in regards to being single. So I took to OKCupid and sent out a ton of messages (I've used it sparingly for years, but barely sent anybody anything, and one single meetup was the most that came from it).

As a result, I'm now currently in back-and-forth messaging with six girls, three of which have given me their number and said they'd be willing to meet up for drinks. I met up with one today, and things went quite well. I texted her afterwards to say I had a good time, and she responded saying she enjoyed it, and that I'm good company.

I feel like there could be something there if I pursue it, but I kind of want to at least meet these other girls. Does that make me an asshole? I would never dream of seeing other girls after committing to somebody, but at what point am I committed to this first girl? I definitely don't want to lead her on. I didn't make any "moves" or anything, but I'm pretty positive she viewed it as an actual date. At one point, when she was telling me something that loosely pertained to her ex-boyfriend, she acknowledged that mentioning him was a faux-pas.

I've never been in a situation even remotely like this before, and I don't want to hurt anybody, but at the same time, I don't want to close any doors I may later regret.

You're not committed to anyone at this point. If you were, then you'd be a jerk. There is really nothing much to say but play the field, enjoy your options and have fun.

I might actually. Not only did her pics give me massive boner-age, she's cool as hell. But really far.

So I just ended it with crazy girl 1, she kept flirting with me all night and it was really obvious she wanted me to kiss her, but I said I just wasn't feeling it, more friend, and we parted ways. I do think she's cool, I wouldn't mind hangin' with her again as a friend.

Now I've got some high hopes for Saturday meet up. She's cute and really fun to talk to. Hope it goes well.

Why didn't she click with you?

that moment when you find out your ex is on OKCupid...

...and of course it says "Y'all got issues"

well no shit, Sherlock!

lol

This seems like a really stupid question, but how important is it to initiate physical contact on the first meetup? I was texting a pretty cool person for about a week before we met up(would've been earlier but some other things came up so we rescheduled.) Everything went well, no awkward pauses, conversation flowed and we had a lot of laughs.. I enjoyed it. We hugged when we first met each other but when we left I didn't really know what to do we just said our goodbyes and walked away without a hug or anything, but she smiled and insisted that I keep texting her. We're still texting and we're going to meet up saturday so everything seems like its still going okay... if she didn't like me she would've stopped talking to me by now.. right? For some reason I feel like I might fall into platonic territory if I don't make an effort to initiate contact. I think my mind is playing tricks on me help me GAF ;_;

She probably wanted you to kiss her. You fucked up, didn't step up and take it to the next level. Just make sure you make move on Saturday. Failure to do so will convince her that you're not interested.

 

[TruckDriver]

Yeah, the match thing is surprisingly accurate for what it's worth. I know right away a low match has traits I can't stand.

That is pretty true, actually. I can tell why I'll get along with one person or another. That's one thing I really like about OKC compared to other sites.

If I link my profile, could you all give me some advice or tips on it? I'm doing pretty well with my messages and getting dates, but I do feel like so many of messages don't get replies. Like, I'll find a profile, write out a nice 2-3 sentence message with a question tailored to their profile, and often not get a response.

Though, I'm guessing this is pretty common.

 

[WascallyWabbit]

That is pretty true, actually. I can tell why I'll get along with one person or another. That's one thing I really like about OKC compared to other sites.

If I link my profile, could you all give me some advice or tips on it? I'm doing pretty well with my messages and getting dates, but I do feel like so many of messages don't get replies. Like, I'll find a profile, write out a nice 2-3 sentence message with a question tailored to their profile, and often not get a response.

Though, I'm guessing this is pretty common.

Yes and yes.

I advise you lead with the question on your messages, if you don't already. No need to say "hi, how are you"

 

[SirButterstick]

Got my second date through OKCupid this Friday. I'm really looking forward to this one, because she seems like a winner. Can't wait!

This site is fun

 

[-PXG-]

That is pretty true, actually. I can tell why I'll get along with one person or another. That's one thing I really like about OKC compared to other sites.

If I link my profile, could you all give me some advice or tips on it? I'm doing pretty well with my messages and getting dates, but I do feel like so many of messages don't get replies. Like, I'll find a profile, write out a nice 2-3 sentence message with a question tailored to their profile, and often not get a response.

Though, I'm guessing this is pretty common.

Sure.

 

[Zozz]

Boss status, got a date tonight and with another girl on Friday. Both of them are black, one an ethiopian beauty (I've talked to her for about a 2 weeks) and another a black, asian, brazilian. (talked to her for like 3 days) Never been into black girls, they're beautiful and seem cool as hell.

Getting some nice pics on my profile and getting A-list has made it easier to search for the small girls I like.

 

[TruckDriver]

Sure.

Okay. Well, here's my profile:

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/AJL_85?cf=profile

Boss status, got a date tonight and with another girl on Friday. Both of them are black, one an ethiopian beauty (I've talked to her for about a 2 weeks) and another a black, asian, brazilian. (talked to her for like 3 days) Never been into black girls, they're beautiful and seem cool as hell.

Getting some nice pics on my profile and getting A-list has made it easier to search for the small girls I like.

Congrats, dude. I've got a second date with a gal planned for next Tuesday night. Should be fun.

I gotta ask too - did you have anyone take photos of you for your profile? I feel like I don't have many great photos just lying around on my harddrive.

 

[Bluemongoose]

Don't revive. The ones that like you will come back, the ones that don't won't.

He speaks truth.

 

[Bluemongoose]

Don't be like that man, there's no reason to get your hopes up and set yourself up for disappointment... I always go in expecting no response, then I get positively surprised by those that DO response instead of feel bad about those that don't.

This man also speaks wisdom. In addition, I'm on Plenty of Fish and I haven't gotten anything out of it. I think my pics are decent and I consider myself a fairly good-looking dude. I don't get it. Could some of you guys give me some pointers?

 

[-PXG-]

Okay. Well, here's my profile:

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/AJL_85?cf=profile



Congrats, dude. I've got a second date with a gal planned for next Tuesday night. Should be fun.

I gotta ask too - did you have anyone take photos of you for your profile? I feel like I don't have many great photos just lying around on my harddrive.

Wow. Good job. There really isn't anything wrong with your profile. Just tidy up grammar, punctuation and capitalization. All you need to do is add some more hobbies and you're fine.

Oh and upload more photos. Do that and you're golden

 

[TruckDriver]

Wow. Good job. There really isn't anything wrong with your profile. Just tidy up grammar, punctuation and capitalization. All you need to do is add some more hobbies and you're fine.

Oh and upload more photos. Do that and you're golden

Cool. But the photos I have now, are they good?

Also, what do y'all say when you message someone? Usually, my emails have me commenting/telling story related to something they listed on their profile (2-3 sentences), then I finish with a question related to their profile.

This man also speaks wisdom. In addition, I'm on Plenty of Fish and I haven't gotten anything out of it. I think my pics are decent and I consider myself a fairly good-looking dude. I don't get it. Could some of you guys give me some pointers?

It's funny, but I've always had very little success on PoF. I think a lot of it has to do with their messaging and matching system. You really don't know who you're a good match for, and why. Plus, you can't add a headline to any of your messages, so it makes it tough to 'grab' someone when you message them.

I'm not sure what I could offer to you - if you're doing well on OkC, you should do well on PoF too(?).

 

[WascallyWabbit]

This man also speaks wisdom. In addition, I'm on Plenty of Fish and I haven't gotten anything out of it. I think my pics are decent and I consider myself a fairly good-looking dude. I don't get it. Could some of you guys give me some pointers?

I think POF is just inferior to OKC and there's a lot less people on it, depending on where you are of course

Wow. Good job. There really isn't anything wrong with your profile. Just tidy up grammar, punctuation and capitalization. All you need to do is add some more hobbies and you're fine.

Oh and upload more photos. Do that and you're golden

I second this. I also gave you a rating

 

[-PXG-]

They are ok. Kind of average. Don't really do anything. Then again, I'm a straight dude

It's good to have photos of you out and about, having fun with friends. It doesn't hurt to have a few (tasteful) vanity pics/ selfies. Not too many.

Edit

Never title a message with hey, hi, whats up, wazzz gud or anything of the sort. The title and content of your message should refer/ respond to a praticular piece of info you found interesting on her profile. That shows that you 1) bothered to read her profile and 2) establish some level of common interest with each other.

That alone will greatly increase your chances of a reply. That with a good profile of your own will should end with satisfying results.

 

[Zozz]

Okay. Well, here's my profile:

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/AJL_85?cf=profile



Congrats, dude. I've got a second date with a gal planned for next Tuesday night. Should be fun.

I gotta ask too - did you have anyone take photos of you for your profile? I feel like I don't have many great photos just lying around on my harddrive.

I usually don't have many shots of me from my recent weight loss, so they're few and thin.

I have a friend who is a great photographer, when we're out and about the cities and hanging out he's always snapping pics. He puts some up online every now and then, I don't pester him for them but they've done wonders. Lots of compliments from the ladies.

I actually talked to him yesterday about him taking some shots and he wants me to do some modeling for him after getting compliments for my shots as well. So I'll be getting more candid shots soon.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Fizzlebees

 

[Bluemongoose]

Cool. But the photos I have now, are they good?

Also, what do y'all say when you message someone? Usually, my emails have me commenting/telling story related to something they listed on their profile (2-3 sentences), then I finish with a question related to their profile.



It's funny, but I've always had very little success on PoF. I think a lot of it has to do with their messaging and matching system. You really don't know who you're a good match for, and why. Plus, you can't add a headline to any of your messages, so it makes it tough to 'grab' someone when you message them.

I'm not sure what I could offer to you - if you're doing well on OkC, you should do well on PoF too(?).

I'm not on Ok Cupid...yet .

 

[False Witness]

Man, girls are freaking weird; at least, the ones that tend to talk to me are.

I've been talking to this one girl for about a month now and she just refuses to adhere to plans, but we've still managed to go out several different times. We'll set something up, she'll break it off, and then she'll text me a few hours later and be like, "Alright, here's what we're going to do." I mean, we're clearly just friends and we spend most nights just talking about random stuff or other people we're seeing or attempting to see and whatnot. Well, during our conversation last night, she just flat out said, "Look. We're going to start having sex." I wasn't really sure how to respond to that other than... "Oh, okay." I honestly had no idea that was how these arrangements get started.

I tried to break it off with this other girl I've been talking to for a while (for unrelated reasons), but apparently I can't seem to do that. We had plans for this weekend that I tried to cancel unsuccessfully. I sent her a relatively long message explaining the reasons why I didn't think it was going to work out between us and she was just like, "Yeah... about that. No. I'll clarify when we meet up later." And then there I went with another, "Oh... okay."

 

[-PXG-]

Man, girls are freaking weird; at least, the ones that tend to talk to me are.

I've been talking to this one girl for about a month now and she just refuses to adhere to plans, but we've still managed to go out several different times. We'll set something up, she'll break it off, and then she'll text me a few hours later and be like, "Alright, here's what we're going to do." I mean, we're clearly just friends and we spend most nights just talking about random stuff or other people we're seeing or attempting to see and whatnot. Well, during our conversation last night, she just flat out said, "Look. We're going to start having sex." I wasn't really sure how to respond to that other than... "Oh, okay." I honestly had no idea that was how these arrangements get started.

I tried to break it off with this other girl I've been talking to for a while (for unrelated reasons), but apparently I can't seem to do that. We had plans for this weekend that I tried to cancel unsuccessfully. I sent her a relatively long message explaining the reasons why I didn't think it was going to work out between us and she was just like, "Yeah... about that. No. I'll clarify when we meet up later." And then there I went with another, "Oh... okay."

So you're complaining about sex and incapable of manning up and telling someone that you don't want to see them.

Urge to choke rising

 

[Irish]

That's pretty funny.

 

[False Witness]

So you're complaining about sex and incapable of manning up and telling someone that you don't want to see them.

Urge to choke rising

Not complaining at all. I was completely surprised at the way she went about. Also found the other girl's persistence hilarious.

 

[Jzero]

Dralla do you do all of the messaging when going on dates or do some girls start the messaging as well?

 

[CarpeDeezNutz]

Here is my profile.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Siva23/photos

It's tailored so that I attract the kind of girl I want, which it did but I facked it up over the weekend :-/.

Incidentally can someone tell me what my dot is? It's on your black message bar. Green, yellow, or red.

 

[dutchguyjack]

Here is my profile.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Siva23/photos

It's tailored so that I attract the kind of girl I want, which it did but I facked it up over the weekend :-/.

Incidentally can someone tell me what my dot is? It's on your black message bar. Green, yellow, or red.

It's green.

I like your first photo, but the rest are either too instagram-y or just bad quality images. Also, I strongly dislike mirror shots and a lot of other people do too.

The rest of your profile seems fine. Rated you.

 

[Shotgun Kiss]

Gonna quote myself as a reference point:

About two weeks ago, due to circumstances I won't go into here, I found myself super depressed in regards to being single. So I took to OKCupid and sent out a ton of messages (I've used it sparingly for years, but barely sent anybody anything, and one single meetup was the most that came from it).

As a result, I'm now currently in back-and-forth messaging with six girls, three of which have given me their number and said they'd be willing to meet up for drinks. I met up with one today, and things went quite well. I texted her afterwards to say I had a good time, and she responded saying she enjoyed it, and that I'm good company.

I feel like there could be something there if I pursue it, but I kind of want to at least meet these other girls. Does that make me an asshole? I would never dream of seeing other girls after committing to somebody, but at what point am I committed to this first girl? I definitely don't want to lead her on. I didn't make any "moves" or anything, but I'm pretty positive she viewed it as an actual date. At one point, when she was telling me something that loosely pertained to her ex-boyfriend, she acknowledged that mentioning him was a faux-pas.

I've never been in a situation even remotely like this before, and I don't want to hurt anybody, but at the same time, I don't want to close any doors I may later regret.

OK, so several people here have assured me that seeing other girls is acceptable at this point. Thank you for the input, by the way.

Today though, this first girl asked me via text about making plans to see a film for a "second date" (her words). I kind of want to stall a bit, as I want enough time to arrange some first dates with these other girls. I want to avoid getting too close with the first girl in the meantime, as I would feel like a jerk if I formed any kind of connection, only to break it off. But at the same time, I'm also equally concerned that if I I don't make any moves, she might lose interest.

Luckily, I'm moving house next week, and she herself asked if I want a bit of time to settle in before arranging another date. So that buys me some time. But still, I feel like I'm straddling a fine line between wanting to reasonably explore my options, and being a complete douchebag. :-(

 

[CarpeDeezNutz]

Gonna quote myself as a reference point:



OK, so several people here have assured me that seeing other girls is acceptable at this point. Thank you for the input, by the way.

Today though, this first girl asked me via text about making plans to see a film for a "second date" (her words). I kind of want to stall a bit, as I want enough time to arrange some first dates with these other girls. I want to avoid getting too close with the first girl in the meantime, as I would feel like a jerk if I formed any kind of connection, only to break it off. But at the same time, I'm also equally concerned that if I I don't make any moves, she might lose interest.

Luckily, I'm moving house next week, and she herself asked if I want a bit of time to settle in before arranging another date. So that buys me some time. But still, I feel like I'm straddling a fine line between wanting to reasonably explore my options, and being a complete douchebag. :-(

Nah man if you are dating but not exclusive it's perfectly fine. I might be wrong but I think what you might dread is this (and I would too): Is that you date this girl for a few weeks but then meet another girl that you end up liking more. You would then have to either be honest with the first girl or play them both. That's just me though.

 

[WascallyWabbit]

Gonna quote myself as a reference point:

OK, so several people here have assured me that seeing other girls is acceptable at this point. Thank you for the input, by the way.

Today though, this first girl asked me via text about making plans to see a film for a "second date" (her words). I kind of want to stall a bit, as I want enough time to arrange some first dates with these other girls. I want to avoid getting too close with the first girl in the meantime, as I would feel like a jerk if I formed any kind of connection, only to break it off. But at the same time, I'm also equally concerned that if I I don't make any moves, she might lose interest.

Luckily, I'm moving house next week, and she herself asked if I want a bit of time to settle in before arranging another date. So that buys me some time. But still, I feel like I'm straddling a fine line between wanting to reasonably explore my options, and being a complete douchebag. :-(

I don't see what the problem is here, are you saying she won't be available for two weeks? Then go out with these other girls already

If you wanna go on a second date with this girl, you should set it up, and in the meantime, you can still go on first dates with these other women

 

[CarpeDeezNutz]

It's green.

I like your first photo, but the rest are either too instagram-y or just bad quality images. Also, I strongly dislike mirror shots and a lot of other people do too.

The rest of your profile seems fine. Rated you.

Hmm thanks for the critique I added a photo timer app to my phone so I can switch it up from the mirror shots haha.

 

[Zozz]

Had a sweet time with a date tonight, she got off super late from work so we hung out at a park and talked for like 2 hours instead of dinner. We had our laughs, no silent moments, real good connection.

All I can say is that pics can lie.

Just make sure you guys are getting your most recent pics on there, she was a bit heftier than her profile led me to believe but I didn't mind that. She complimented on the fact that I actually look like my picture haha. I didn't touch on the subject about her picture. We agreed to do something next week, I have another date with another girl this Friday, so I'll see how that goes.

 

[stn]

How do you know when you have "hot" status on OKC? I have over 20 high ratings, shouldn't I have it by now? Or maybe I just can't tell???

 

[notsofast]

I joined this site a couple of days ago and already Ive lined up drinks with a gal from nearby, she seems pretty interesting so should be fun either way, I didnt even have to send her a message, she just messaged me the other night and we've chatted since, seem to have a few things in common.

Looking forward to seeing what happens tomorrow.

 

[IISANDERII]

Help

After a few messages I ask if they'd like to text instead. We start texting then I don't know what to converse about. I can't go check out her profile again because then she'll see that I'm digging into her profile for things to talk about and that seems very awkward.

 

[TheApatheticOne]

Got my first date tonight since being divorced. Lets see if this old dog can still hunt!

 

[WascallyWabbit]

Help

After a few messages I ask if they'd like to text instead. We start texting then I don't know what to converse about. I can't go check out her profile again because then she'll see that I'm digging into her profile for things to talk about and that seems very awkward.

Two things: Women get like 40 visitors a day, most women I know don't even bother looking at that anymore, so unless she happens to be online, you're safe.
Also, if you're at a point where you don't know what to text about, that means you should ask her out on a date already

Got my first date tonight since being divorced. Lets see if this old dog can still hunt!

Good luck!

 

[donkey show]

Got my first date tonight since being divorced. Lets see if this old dog can still hunt!

I know that feel man, you'll be fine. If anything, just be yourself and build up dat confidence.

 

[Kurtofan]

Help

After a few messages I ask if they'd like to text instead. We start texting then I don't know what to converse about. I can't go check out her profile again because then she'll see that I'm digging into her profile for things to talk about and that seems very awkward.

Can't you write it down?That way you won't have to come back to her profile every time.

 

[-PXG-]

Here is my profile.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Siva23/photos

It's tailored so that I attract the kind of girl I want, which it did but I facked it up over the weekend :-/.

Incidentally can someone tell me what my dot is? It's on your black message bar. Green, yellow, or red.

Profile is great. Take down some of the intagram'd stuff. Some of them are cool though. You don't need too many photos. Other than, you're fine.

Gonna quote myself as a reference point:



OK, so several people here have assured me that seeing other girls is acceptable at this point. Thank you for the input, by the way.

Today though, this first girl asked me via text about making plans to see a film for a "second date" (her words). I kind of want to stall a bit, as I want enough time to arrange some first dates with these other girls. I want to avoid getting too close with the first girl in the meantime, as I would feel like a jerk if I formed any kind of connection, only to break it off. But at the same time, I'm also equally concerned that if I I don't make any moves, she might lose interest.

Luckily, I'm moving house next week, and she herself asked if I want a bit of time to settle in before arranging another date. So that buys me some time. But still, I feel like I'm straddling a fine line between wanting to reasonably explore my options, and being a complete douchebag. :-(

Stop feeling bad. Don't. You should be thrilled that these girls want to see you. You're not committed to anyone yet. Hell, one girl asked you if you needed time to move could be hint in itself. Maybe she wants to help out. Or maybe she's hoping you ditch your responsibilities for a moment to have fun with her instead. You gotta assert yourself.

Had a sweet time with a date tonight, she got off super late from work so we hung out at a park and talked for like 2 hours instead of dinner. We had our laughs, no silent moments, real good connection.

All I can say is that pics can lie.

Just make sure you guys are getting your most recent pics on there, she was a bit heftier than her profile led me to believe but I didn't mind that. She complimented on the fact that I actually look like my picture haha. I didn't touch on the subject about her picture. We agreed to do something next week, I have another date with another girl this Friday, so I'll see how that goes.

Thick girl? Curvy? Buxom? Big booty? Go for a kiss?

I joined this site a couple of days ago and already Ive lined up drinks with a gal from nearby, she seems pretty interesting so should be fun either way, I didnt even have to send her a message, she just messaged me the other night and we've chatted since, seem to have a few things in common.

Looking forward to seeing what happens tomorrow.

Good luck

Help

After a few messages I ask if they'd like to text instead. We start texting then I don't know what to converse about. I can't go check out her profile again because then she'll see that I'm digging into her profile for things to talk about and that seems very awkward.

That's not awkward at all. Theres a reason why these sites allow you to write so much in the first place. Inquiring details from her profile shows that you're interested in her and actually give a shit. Don't talk too much too soon. Save stuff for the first date.

 

[TruckDriver]

Got my first date tonight since being divorced. Lets see if this old dog can still hunt!

Let us know how it goes!

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I also posted some new photos, which look pretty damn good, I think. I'm meeting up with an old buddy tonight. I haven't seen him since I broke up with my ex. Should be a lot to talk about.

I've been talking to another teacher on OkC, and asked today if she wanted to grab drinks next week to celebrate the end of the semester. We'll see what she says.

 

[TheApatheticOne]

Let us know how it goes!

Will do! Not even nervous, which is surprising considering its our first meet up. Kinda got a "fuck it" attitude, which may or may not serve me well.

Zozz - see, I don't mind some meat on the bones. I'm not a small guy myself. But I'm a face guy. Every other body part, we can work with or around. But the face... Clothed or naked, 100% of the time, I'm staring at that mug, so it better be a good one.

 

[WascallyWabbit]

Will do! Not even nervous, which is surprising considering its our first meet up. Kinda got a "fuck it" attitude, which may or may not serve me well.

Zozz - see, I don't mind some meat on the bones. I'm not a small guy myself. But I'm a face guy. Every other body part, we can work with or around. But the face... Clothed or naked, 100% of the time, I'm staring at that mug, so it better be a good one.

what about doggy? do you have some kind of mirror set up in your bedroom?

 

[dralla]

Dralla do you do all of the messaging when going on dates or do some girls start the messaging as well?

You mean sending the first message? It's both for me. Girl I went out with this week IM'd via the chat thing on OKC. Girl I'm going out with this weekend, I messaged her first. I've also noticed that girls on POF are more likely to message me first compared to OKC. I think because of the way the messaging works on POF, you need to change up your strategy a little, the "X or Y" thing doesn't work as much on POF because you can't actually read the messages unless you go into the inbox. On OKC you can read the message right from the message list.

 

[Jhoan]

You mean sending the first message? It's both for me. Girl I went out with this week IM'd via the chat thing on OKC. Girl I'm going out with this weekend, I messaged her first. I've also noticed that girls on POF are more likely to message me first compared to OKC. I think because of the way the messaging works on POF, you need to change up your strategy a little, the "X or Y" thing doesn't work as much on POF because you can't actually read the messages unless you go into the inbox. On OKC you can read the message right from the message list.

You're probably a lot like my brother then. My brother just got a message yesterday from a chick yesterday who lives in MA saying she's gonna be in town for the weekend for an event and left a wink smiley at the end of her message. My bro is one lucky ass dude and he has one picture. I'm still baffled by that.

Do you have a good amount of information on your profile or something? Or do chicks hit you up based on your pictures only? I recall you mentioning that your profile is funny so chicks comment on that. It helps that sorta look like Ryan Gosling to some degree.

You said you live in Long Island right? Come out to NYC next Friday night if you're free. We're having a meet up. GAF members from LI come out from LI all the time unless you live way far out from the city.

 

[-PXG-]

You're probably a lot like my brother then. My brother just got a message yesterday from a chick yesterday who lives in MA saying she's gonna be in town for the weekend for an event and left a wink smiley at the end of her message. My bro is one lucky ass dude and he has one picture. I'm still baffled by that.

Do you have a good amount of information on your profile or something? Or do chicks hit you up based on your pictures only? I recall you mentioning that your profile is funny so chicks comment on that. It helps that sorta look like Ryan Gosling to some degree.

You said you live in Long Island right? Come out to NYC next Friday night if you're free. We're having a meet up. GAF members from LI come out from LI all the time unless you live way far out from the city.

Your brother's face

 

[dralla]

You're probably a lot like my brother then. My brother just got a message yesterday from a chick yesterday who lives in MA saying she's gonna be in town for the weekend for an event and left a wink smiley at the end of her message. My bro is one lucky ass dude and he has one picture. I'm still baffled by that.

Do you have a good amount of information on your profile or something? Or do chicks hit you up based on your pictures only? I recall you mentioning that your profile is funny so chicks comment on that. It helps that sorta look like Ryan Gosling to some degree.

You said you live in Long Island right? Come out to NYC next Friday night if you're free. We're having a meet up. GAF members from LI come out from LI all the time unless you live way far out from the city.

I can't really say why I get messages, you'd have to ask them lol I know when I first started I didn't get messages at all. I've changed all my pictures, my profile, and my general approach, so I can't really say which had the biggest effect.

The majority of my profile stays the same, I will change the Self Summary once in a while, just because I feel like that's the most important, it's right up top and it's probably the one thing most people will read. It used to have more jokes/humor, but I thought it came off as a little immature/man-child, I've noticed I've started to get more unsolicited messages since. Essentially what I do is try and get my personality across without actually saying much about myself, that way you have something to talk about and get to know each other in person. I've gotten a few messages telling me they liked my profile, so it's working! I've also gotten a few Gosling comments hah, I don't really look like him though!

As for Friday, I'm gonna be starting a new job on Monday, I'm not sure when I'll get out on Friday, so I probably won't be able to make it. If any GAF'ers wanna hang on a weekend or something I'd be down for it. LI, or in NYC, doesn't matter. I'm not too far from the city, 40min train ride.

 

[stn]

Question for you guys...

Was talking to a girl for a while (two weeks-ish). I proposed a meet-up, she dodged the question but continued messaging me. Anyway, I continued chatting with her since I know its harder for the girl to commit to the online meet-up than the guy.

At one point she started requesting I put up more pics, apparently because she's convinced that people can do things with lighting, Photoshop, and the like. I have one pic, that's all I feel I need. The beautiful thing about my pic is that I took it while not giving two shits at all. I'm wearing a plain t-shirt and just sitting in my room. It CLEARLY shows my face, which is what I was going for. Despite not giving a shit I STILL get highly rated, so I don't even know what this girl's issue is.

Anyway, I became kind of annoyed because I felt like I was at her mercy, having to send her pics so she can decide if I really am the dude in the pic, know what I mean? In my mind, I don't want to sit around while she's deciding in her head of that's really how I look just so we can get one stupid coffee. The irony of it is that I'm NOT photogenic, so I look 10x better in real-life.

Anyway, I stopped messaging her since my care-cup ran out. She's quite hot but I stop caring once I'm not feeling it for whatever reason. Have I acted too harshly?

 

[Jzero]

Question for you guys...

Was talking to a girl for a while (two weeks-ish). I proposed a meet-up, she dodged the question but continued messaging me. Anyway, I continued chatting with her since I know its harder for the girl to commit to the online meet-up than the guy.

At one point she started requesting I put up more pics, apparently because she's convinced that people can do things with lighting, Photoshop, and the like. I have one pic, that's all I feel I need. The beautiful thing about my pic is that I took it while not giving two shits at all. I'm wearing a plain t-shirt and just sitting in my room. It CLEARLY shows my face, which is what I was going for. Despite not giving a shit I STILL get highly rated, so I don't even know what this girl's issue is.

Dude, multiple photos are a must for anyone that i'm going to message. You may think one picture is fine but it definitely is not. There's some chicks that look good in their main photo and in the rest they look like they gained 30 pounds. She just wants to make sure that you look the same from different angles and stuff. A lot of photographs are very misleading.

 

[UFRA]

Dude, multiple photos are a must for anyone that i'm going to message. You may think one picture is fine but it definitely is not. There's some chicks that look good in their main photo and in the rest they look like they gained 30 pounds. She just wants to make sure that you look the same from different angles and stuff.

Yup. If I see a really hot girl that only has 1 pic, I automatically assume scammer/fatty/etc. and completely avoid contact.

Last year I had only 1 profile pic and barely got any messages. Then I dated someone for 7 months, now I'm single again starting this year. I decided to take the dating thing more seriously and now I have like 6 photos in my profile, all of me doing something cool, and now I get girls who send the initial message to me. Feels good.

 

[stn]

Hm, I see what you guys mean. Honestly, don't think I'll do anything about it anyway. I've been talking to a girl better looking than her for weeks now but I was just curious for future consideration.

Argh, now I gotta go get a haircut and shit just for some stupid pics. Thanks for the insight, gents.