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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!

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K

KINGofCRA5H

Member
WascallyWabbit said:
looks solid, but why does it say you're only looking for new friends? To me, that implies you're not interested in dating.



Lookds good, but put a picture up of you smiling, and use that as your main

Gave both of you guys ratings as well
Click to expand...

Thanks. You're right about smiling, even though it's hard for me to put up a decent looking smile that doesn't look bad/fake. I need someone to take a pic of me after I just finished laughing or something
 
F

False Witness

Member
Spunky Monkey said:
Sure. Now i got to figure out if its my pictures/looks, my messages or my profile thats the issue. Im guessing its one of the first two but don't know if it is or what to do about them.
Click to expand...

Personally, I would change the Message me if: section.

On the other hand, my profile is like the anti-thesis of the one recommended by GAF and I still end up with a fair number of unsolicited messages. It's like a mile long, somewhat negative, and has nothing but awful pictures.
 
-tetsuo-

-tetsuo-

Unlimited Capacity
False Witness said:
Personally, I would change the Message me if: section.

On the other hand, my profile is like the anti-thesis of the one recommended by GAF and I still end up with a fair number of unsolicited messages. It's like a mile long, somewhat negative, and has nothing but awful pictures.
Click to expand...

Lets see it
 
F

False Witness

Member
_tetsuo_ said:
Lets see it
Click to expand...

Alright, in the email tag. Quote to see and the like.

Took it out now that I'm sure it's been seen.

No ratings though. I like to know when they are legitimate.

It's a generally bad profile, but it works for me somehow.

I really do think it depends on what area you're in though, when it comes to success. Indy is a relatively decent sized city, but nothing close to something you'd see on the coast or even some of the bigger Midwest cities.
 
S

Spunky Monkey

Member
False Witness said:
Personally, I would change the Message me if: section.

On the other hand, my profile is like the anti-thesis of the one recommended by GAF and I still end up with a fair number of unsolicited messages. It's like a mile long, somewhat negative, and has nothing but awful pictures.
Click to expand...

What would you say is wrong with it and what would be better?
 
X

Xun

Member
Apparently I'm now a mod? I assume everyone becomes one at some point?

UFRA said:
No. (edit: if that's the only pic you mean. If you have others, sure)

If you want any chance of getting girls to be interested in you based on your profile, follow these tips:

1) Don't have your primary pic of you taking a pic of yourself with a cell phone.

2) Have pics of you doing something INTERESTING, other than purposely posing for a pic for your profile.

3) Smile. You can post pics of you being cool later, but for your primary pic show a nice normal smile.

Trust me. These are the things that really help get you visitors and replies.

My experience: Started online dating, was afraid to show many pics, so I just took a few stupid ones of me posing at home with my cell phone. Met 0 women in the course of 3-4 months. Got a girlfriend from outside of online dating, lasted 7 months, now here I am back online dating again.

Now, I put up nothing but pics of me doing something exciting, or active and only ONE pic of me with the cell phone (which I mocked in the pic description for comic value) and I now get plenty of visitors, replies, and I've met 4 women in the past 3 months alone. I attribute this mostly to my MUCH better pics now.

My current pics consist of: Me in a suit at a friend's wedding (my primary photo), in a river outside fishing, on a bike in Washington DC with a friend, in a racing suit at a race track, and one crappy cell phone pose pic just for kicks. This makes it look way more appealing, and like I do things in life.
Click to expand...
I have a lot of other photos, was just wondering if it was worth adding.
 
F

False Witness

Member
Spunky Monkey said:
What would you say is wrong with it and what would be better?
Click to expand...

First, don't take any inspiration from mine. It's not a good one either, but I haven't had many problems lately.

I would just take out the stuff about 'cute, fun-loving, yada yada'. I've always found that stuff unappealing. Message me if you like doing _____ (specifics). I'm really no expert though.
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
Cupid is doing some interesting scam tactics in the match results. After like a week of sending messages my results list now only shows large women. And on the right side is an AD saying premium users can search by body type. Fuckin with my matches.
 
J

Jimothy

Member
It's unreal how many attractive girls are visiting my profile. I've been going through an incredibly rough couple of months dealing with depression and anxiety so this is an incredible self esteem boost. I really don't mean to brag but I'm feeling pretty good about myself for the first time in a while. I'm still awkward as fuck when it comes to actually messaging girls. I always run out of things to say after about 5 messages.
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
Jimothy said:
It's unreal how many attractive girls are visiting my profile. I've been going through an incredibly rough couple of months dealing with depression and anxiety so this is an incredible self esteem boost. I really don't mean to brag but I'm feeling pretty good about myself for the first time in a while. I'm still awkward as fuck when it comes to actually messaging girls. I always run out of things to say after about 5 messages.
Click to expand...
That's why by the 4th message you should be moving onto phone convo to ask them out.


Also, for the thread, Here is my profile. What is wrong with me?
 
F

False Witness

Member
Jimothy said:
I'm still awkward as fuck when it comes to actually messaging girls. I always run out of things to say after about 5 messages.
Click to expand...

This may have less to do with you and more the fault of who you are talking to. I mean, I can carry on a conversation forever, but I don't like to put myself into that position where I feel like I'm giving an interview. Quite frankly, a lot of girls on these sites are really bad at messaging as well, even when they are quite interested in you.


In general, you're supposed to move the conversation away from OKC or wherever rather quickly, but I'd much rather carry on typing than move to talking or text until I've learned all the basic information. Not everyone is that way. The last two girls I've spoken with have asked me out within a day, but the girl I happened to really like exchanged some 10,000 words with me before we switched to texting and then going out (her idea). So, it really just varies.

I wait until they suggest texting and then I'll give them my number if they haven't already given me theirs.

EDIT: Holy fuck. Did I miss the day when GAF was handing out good looks?
 
H

HP_Wuvcraft

Banned
~Kinggi~ said:
Cupid is doing some interesting scam tactics in the match results. After like a week of sending messages my results list now only shows large women. And on the right side is an AD saying premium users can search by body type. Fuckin with my matches.
Click to expand...

I expect this to just get worse as time goes on.
 
W

WascallyWabbit

Member
~Kinggi~ said:
Cupid is doing some interesting scam tactics in the match results. After like a week of sending messages my results list now only shows large women. And on the right side is an AD saying premium users can search by body type. Fuckin with my matches.
Click to expand...

Haven't noticed this yet. Have you been rated highly, though? It will filter your results if you are not properly rated so that it doesn't show girls who are 4-5 star ratings
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
WascallyWabbit said:
Haven't noticed this yet. Have you been rated highly, though? It will filter your results if you are not properly rated so that it doesn't show girls who are 4-5 star ratings
Click to expand...

Every now and then, months ago i'd get notifications saying someone rated me highly. But that doesnt seem to happen anymore.

Maybe it is deciphering after my recent mass sendout of messages that not getting any replies means im bottom of the barrel material.
 
H

HP_Wuvcraft

Banned
~Kinggi~ said:
Maybe it is deciphering after my recent mass sendout of messages that not getting any replies means im bottom of the barrel material.
Click to expand...

I just don't understand why, after a few to a few dozen normal PMs back and forth, for no reason at all people stop talking to you.

Was what I said about not liking rollercoasters really that horrible?

I dunno, maybe it's because I work with a lot of artists that just stop working with me without saying why or that they even are going to.
 
U

UFRA

Member
Ok, been having a strange thing happen lately.

Over the past 2 weeks, I sent out at least 5-7 messages, and these were all very good picks for me. I wasn't "settling" on anything and was being picky.

I noticed all of my messages were read on the same day they were sent (this is a match.com story) so after a day or two with no reply I figured I was tossed aside.

Then, suddenly 3 different girls all messaged me almost 5 days after my original messages. Some of which were girls that I thought were great matches but were probably above what I could ever attract lol.

Now I've got all these replies!!
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
dralla said:
Your profile is really long and is a bit redundant. Shorten it up and try and add some personality/humor in there where you can.
Click to expand...

What's redundant?

Any input from anyone is helpful. On my photos or content etc. I have had no success on this site so i'd appreciate feedback. A bunch of you visited i know that.
 
S

Smiley90

Stop shitting on my team. Start shitting on my finger.
WascallyWabbit said:
Haven't noticed this yet. Have you been rated highly, though? It will filter your results if you are not properly rated so that it doesn't show girls who are 4-5 star ratings
Click to expand...

Wrong. You see all possible matches, even higher-rated ones. Attractivity-ratings only influence what you see on your FRONT PAGE (e.g. The facebook-style updates) and who sees you on their front page. OKC doesn't hide anybody in their match result page. Unless people with a-list search by attractiveness of course.
 
P

Pastry

Banned
Well this is frustrating. Had what I thought was a really solid first date. We text afterwards saying we both had a good time and she says maybe we can get together this coming weekend and do something. I get really busy the next day and text her yesterday to see what's up. No response... so I figured well back to OKC. I'm looking at my received messages and notice that her profile has been removed from OKC also.

I can understand not responding to messages on OKC or whatever, that's not a big deal. But once you get a number and a date I'd at least appreciate the courtesy of telling me you didn't feel chemistry or don't think it'll work or whatever. Pretty frustrating...
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
Pastry said:
Well this is frustrating. Had what I thought was a really solid first date. We text afterwards saying we both had a good time and she says maybe we can get together this coming weekend and do something. I get really busy the next day and text her yesterday to see what's up. No response... so I figured well back to OKC. I'm looking at my received messages and notice that her profile has been removed from OKC also.

I can understand not responding to messages on OKC or whatever, that's not a big deal. But once you get a number and a date I'd at least appreciate the courtesy of telling me you didn't feel chemistry or don't think it'll work or whatever. Pretty frustrating...
Click to expand...

Removal of the profile so close after the date is always wonderful.
 
M

maxxpower

Member
Pastry said:
Well this is frustrating. Had what I thought was a really solid first date. We text afterwards saying we both had a good time and she says maybe we can get together this coming weekend and do something. I get really busy the next day and text her yesterday to see what's up. No response... so I figured well back to OKC. I'm looking at my received messages and notice that her profile has been removed from OKC also.

I can understand not responding to messages on OKC or whatever, that's not a big deal. But once you get a number and a date I'd at least appreciate the courtesy of telling me you didn't feel chemistry or don't think it'll work or whatever. Pretty frustrating...
Click to expand...

Eh, that's sorta how dating works nowadays. Not responding to your text is just her way of saying she's not interested in you, men do the same thing as well. She probably went on dates with other men and she ended up choosing someone else over you. If she deleted her profile it could be because she doesn't have to date right now.
 
P

Pastry

Banned
maxxpower said:
Eh, that's sorta how dating works nowadays. Not responding to your text is just her way of saying she's not interested in you, men do the same thing as well. She probably went on dates with other men and she ended up choosing someone else over you. If she deleted her profile it could be because she doesn't have to date right now.
Click to expand...

Yeah, I understand that and I'm honestly not bothered by the whole thing. I'll get more dates but I guess I was under the assumption she'd let me know if she didn't think it'd go any further. On to the next one!
 
M

maxxpower

Member
Pastry said:
Yeah, I understand that and I'm honestly not bothered by the whole thing. I'll get more dates but I guess I was under the assumption she'd let me know if she didn't think it'd go any further. On to the next one!
Click to expand...

She probably would have let you know if you guys had gone out on more dates. After the first date though, probably not likely to happen.
 
V

vatstep

This poster pulses with an appeal so broad the typical restraints of our societies fall by the wayside.
I have a number of messages that are in the realm of, "yeah, I'm around this weekend, let's meet up, etc." (haven't exchanged numbers just yet because I don't really like texting much), but I know I'm not going to be around for a while because I have to work this weekend. I'm conflicted between just waiting a few days before getting back to them, or exchanging numbers and trying to do the "text occasionally so they don't forget about me" deal. Blerg, I suck at timing.
 
D

donkey show

Member
vatstep said:
I have a number of messages that are in the realm of, "yeah, I'm around this weekend, let's meet up, etc." (haven't exchanged numbers just yet because I don't really like texting much), but I know I'm not going to be around for a while because I have to work this weekend. I'm conflicted between just waiting a few days before getting back to them, or exchanging numbers and trying to do the "text occasionally so they don't forget about me" deal. Blerg, I suck at timing.
Click to expand...

If they are cool with meeting up already, just hit them up via text and feel it out from there. They're obviously cool with seeing you in person if they mention it, so don't play yourself out of the game.
 
V

vatstep

This poster pulses with an appeal so broad the typical restraints of our societies fall by the wayside.
donkey show said:
If they are cool with meeting up already, just hit them up via text and feel it out from there. They're obviously cool with seeing you in person if they mention it, so don't play yourself out of the game.
Click to expand...
I know, it's just the timing that sucks. I don't want to wait and possibly have them lose interest, but I also don't really want to have to text small talk and bullshit for like two weeks to keep them engaged. I just don't really like texting too much before meeting.
 
Maddocks

Maddocks

Member
text them to set up a date, if they take longer then week to meet, toss the number and the person.

No one wants to waste time for a week+ only to be told that their first choice finally messaged them back and it was fun but they want to see what happens there.

From personal experience at least that girls who string you about for a week+ are only doing it to waste time till someone else they marked comes back into their life. Don't allow that to be you, so try to set a meet asap. Anything longer then a week of them going,"I would but I'm busy" or the even worse,"I'll go out on Thursday!" then on Wednesday they say,"Work call me in last minute OMG!" Don't believe dem lies!
 
V

vatstep

This poster pulses with an appeal so broad the typical restraints of our societies fall by the wayside.
Maddocks said:
text them to set up a date, if they take longer then week to meet, toss the number and the person.

No one wants to waste time for a week+ only to be told that their first choice finally messaged them back and it was fun but they want to see what happens there.

From personal experience at least that girls who string you about for a week+ are only doing it to waste time till someone else they marked comes back into their life. Don't allow that to be you, so try to set a meet asap. Anything longer then a week of them going,"I would but I'm busy" or the even worse,"I'll go out on Thursday!" then on Wednesday they say,"Work call me in last minute OMG!" Don't believe dem lies!
Click to expand...
I appreciate the advice, but in this case, I'm the problem — I just do not have the time to meet up with anyone for another, like, week and a half, but I have two, possibly three women that seem to want to meet up ASAP. I'm just trying to juggle them.

But, whatever, if I lose 'em, I lose 'em. There'll be more.
 
Maddocks

Maddocks

Member
Cow Mengde said:
For some reason... I only attract women who are willing to talk about the zombie apocalypse... Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
Click to expand...

depends on if you like the zombie apocalypse scenario. I personally rather Mad Max it up after a nuke war. Give me my car, 2 big gas tanks and a leather jacket. Zombies are cool to discuss, but it all comes down to....Do I have enough bullets and know how to survive a horde? The answer is no, you will never have enough.
 
H

HP_Wuvcraft

Banned
~Kinggi~ said:
For you guys getting replies from girls, how many messages a week would you say you send?
Click to expand...

I always gauge it by how interested they are in continuing to talk to me.

If they just, you know, stop, I usually take the hint.

Normally, it's a back and forth. I don't message them unless they message me.
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
HP_Wuvcraft said:
I always gauge it by how interested they are in continuing to talk to me.

If they just, you know, stop, I usually take the hint.

Normally, it's a back and forth. I don't message them unless they message me.
Click to expand...

I was trying to gauge how many failed attempts per successful one. Im still trying to get one message here,
 
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