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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!

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W

WascallyWabbit

Member
Shotgun Kiss said:
A few days ago, I got a reply to a message I sent to a girl several weeks ago. She apologised for the delay, and said it's because she doesn't use OKCupid anymore, and only did so recently because somebody in real life reminded her about it.

She responded pretty positively to my message, and even said my profile made her laugh ("in a good way"). She said she'd love to chat sometime.

I then sent her a message back, asking her a bit more, such as where she worked, to which she replied, and asked what I did.

I sent her a message back, and haven't heard back since. She hasn't even been online since then. That was almost a week ago. Under most circumstamces, I'd shrug it off, but the fact that she hasn't been online, and has already said she didn't really use OKC anymore, means I'm wondering if she just forgot.

The thing is, while I don't know her number, I know her name, and where she works (it's right around the corner from where I work). Would it be creepy to leave a brief letter for her, just to give her my number? I'd probably wait another week or so before doing that though.
Click to expand...

That's creepy, just make sure to get her number next time she responds. And if she doesn't? just let it go
 
H

HP_Wuvcraft

Banned
Shotgun Kiss said:
A few days ago, I got a reply to a message I sent to a girl several weeks ago. She apologised for the delay, and said it's because she doesn't use OKCupid anymore, and only did so recently because somebody in real life reminded her about it.

She responded pretty positively to my message, and even said my profile made her laugh ("in a good way"). She said she'd love to chat sometime.

I then sent her a message back, asking her a bit more, such as where she worked, to which she replied, and asked what I did.

I sent her a message back, and haven't heard back since. She hasn't even been online since then. That was almost a week ago. Under most circumstamces, I'd shrug it off, but the fact that she hasn't been online, and has already said she didn't really use OKC anymore, means I'm wondering if she just forgot.

The thing is, while I don't know her number, I know her name, and where she works (it's right around the corner from where I work). Would it be creepy to leave a brief letter for her, just to give her my number? I'd probably wait another week or so before doing that though.
Click to expand...

Creepy.
 
J

Jimothy

Member
Okay so last night I went on a date with a girl. This going to sound kind of douchey but the first thing I noticed about her was that she was more overweight than I was expecting. On her profile she said her body was average so I was kind of surprised. We had a nice time and there weren't really any awkward moments but I honestly wasn't physically attracted to her. She invited me back to her place but I politely declined and said I'd come over tomorrow (today). Well, it's today and I'm not sure I want to go over there. It's pretty much a guarantee something sexual will go down and I'm in the middle of a long dry spell. I guess my dilemma right now is whether to go for the sure thing or move on to someone better. Thing is im not how soon that better someone will appear. Any thoughts or suggestions?
 
V

Van Owen

Banned
Jimothy said:
Okay so last night I went on a date with a girl. This going to sound kind of douchey but the first thing I noticed about her was that she was more overweight than I was expecting. On her profile she said her body was average so I was kind of surprised. We had a nice time and there weren't really any awkward moments but I honestly wasn't physically attracted to her. She invited me back to her place but I politely declined and said I'd come over tomorrow (today). Well, it's today and I'm not sure I want to go over there. It's pretty much a guarantee something sexual will go down and I'm in the middle of a long dry spell. I guess my dilemma right now is whether to go for the sure thing or move on to someone better. Thing is im not how soon that better someone will appear. Any thoughts or suggestions?
Click to expand...

Fat girls are great for getting out of slumps.

OR SO I HEAR
 
stn

stn

Member
Jimothy - I've had a sexual dry period myself. Still, I never settle for less than what I want. I don't think you need to, either. Ditch what you don't really want and work towards what you really DO want.
 
M

maxxpower

Member
Jimothy said:
Okay so last night I went on a date with a girl. This going to sound kind of douchey but the first thing I noticed about her was that she was more overweight than I was expecting. On her profile she said her body was average so I was kind of surprised. We had a nice time and there weren't really any awkward moments but I honestly wasn't physically attracted to her. She invited me back to her place but I politely declined and said I'd come over tomorrow (today). Well, it's today and I'm not sure I want to go over there. It's pretty much a guarantee something sexual will go down and I'm in the middle of a long dry spell. I guess my dilemma right now is whether to go for the sure thing or move on to someone better. Thing is im not how soon that better someone will appear. Any thoughts or suggestions?
Click to expand...

Is she like fat or just overweight? Because there's definitely a difference.
 
U

UFRA

Member
Jimothy said:
Okay so last night I went on a date with a girl. This going to sound kind of douchey but the first thing I noticed about her was that she was more overweight than I was expecting. On her profile she said her body was average so I was kind of surprised. We had a nice time and there weren't really any awkward moments but I honestly wasn't physically attracted to her. She invited me back to her place but I politely declined and said I'd come over tomorrow (today). Well, it's today and I'm not sure I want to go over there. It's pretty much a guarantee something sexual will go down and I'm in the middle of a long dry spell. I guess my dilemma right now is whether to go for the sure thing or move on to someone better. Thing is im not how soon that better someone will appear. Any thoughts or suggestions?
Click to expand...

lol.

Ok, I had this same situation about a month ago with a girl I met online. Same thing, she looked good in photos, listed self "about average", but they were all OLD and she now was pretty overweight (double chin levels).

She had a great personality though and we got along well. Also, I had a dry spell going too, about 7 months. So...she invited me over to her place and we messed around a bit. Then, we went on a second date and things went further.

I then felt bad knowing that I was kind of leading her on because A) I had no interest in a long term relationship (or any relationship with her) due to me not being attracted to her and B) After messing around with her, to just kind of bail out felt bad.

So, if you can deal with the guilt...

I'm not going to do shit like that anymore, it just seemed weird. My new rule is that if I'm not physically attracted, DO NOT pass Go.
 
U

UFRA

Member
Van Owen said:
These chicks are inviting you over on the first date they might just be craving some dick. I wouldn't feel too guilty.
Click to expand...

I guess that's a fair point.

I mean, if THEY are the ones offering to have the guy come over it kind of shows their intentions.

I guess at least in my situation that was something I never had happen before (first date going that far) and so I felt kinda weird about it.
 
B

butzopower

proud of his butz
Jimothy said:
Okay so last night I went on a date with a girl. This going to sound kind of douchey but the first thing I noticed about her was that she was more overweight than I was expecting. On her profile she said her body was average so I was kind of surprised. We had a nice time and there weren't really any awkward moments but I honestly wasn't physically attracted to her. She invited me back to her place but I politely declined and said I'd come over tomorrow (today). Well, it's today and I'm not sure I want to go over there. It's pretty much a guarantee something sexual will go down and I'm in the middle of a long dry spell. I guess my dilemma right now is whether to go for the sure thing or move on to someone better. Thing is im not how soon that better someone will appear. Any thoughts or suggestions?
Click to expand...

At this point you've probably either already went or didn't, but I'd say go for it. Something casual and fun is probably what you want coming out of a dry spell, not something you're going to get attached to. I think a decent percentage of people dating online are looking just to hook up now and then, and I don't think it's something to necessarily be ashamed of. She might even be a good lay. Wear a condom.
 
P

Pastry

Banned
Got another date tomorrow, pretty excited about it. She's cute and the last date I had was even better looking than her pictures so hopefully that's the case again haha.

Anyone find themselves taking girls to the same date spots? I guess I found a couple of places that work really well for first dates and I just cycle through those.
 
Maddocks

Maddocks

Member
When you think you will have sex. Its best to just do it. It feels good and its an ego boost. Never feel bad about it. You want it, they are inviting you over to their place for a reason. So accept it, give it to em hard and long but be safe and wear protection.

then once you are done and happy you can message more people because you are ready to party again and with the ego boost your messages will be better then ever.

Moral of the story. If you think you will have sex on the first date or second, just do it.
 
Maddocks

Maddocks

Member
I was posting from the fly on how I feel about it. I feel if a girl is inviting you to her house on day 1 without even meeting you in person, might as well take advantage of the situation shes presenting you. If shes down to have sex, then do it. If you are in a dry spell and think it will help. Once you feel good about yourself for doing something, your attitude changes. Sometimes for the better.
 
G

GatorBait

Member
I'm taking a new position at my company that will result in me traveling much less than I currently do, so I'm thinking with my surplus of free time, I should get back in to the dating market.

Anybody have any good guidelines for creating a successful profile? I tend to be verbose and/or long-winded at times and I have a feeling I will want to moderate myself with how much I write, but on the other hand, I want to have enough information that conveys some of my interests/passions and lets my personality show (which I may have a problem with; most of my writing in my profession is very formal, so I sometimes find it tough to write in a "voice" that reflects my in-person personality).
 
W

WascallyWabbit

Member
GatorBait said:
I'm taking a new position at my company that will result in me traveling much less than I currently do, so I'm thinking with my surplus of free time, I should get back in to the dating market.

Anybody have any good guidelines for creating a successful profile? I tend to be verbose and/or long-winded at times and I have a feeling I will want to moderate myself with how much I write, but on the other hand, I want to have enough information that conveys some of my interests/passions and lets my personality show (which I may have a problem with; most of my writing in my profession is very formal, so I sometimes find it tough to write in a "voice" that reflects my in-person personality).
Click to expand...

Be funny, show who you are, self-deprecation doesn't work well in print. Keep it simple, and post it on here for critique when you're done

for more tips on online dating in general, there's a good section in one of the older dating-age OT's about it:
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=414419
 
?

(._.)

Banned
I created another okcupid LOL. I feel so burned out from my last relationship. I also feel like I have so many options outside of the site. Thing is there is something I like about their match system. Knowing somebody is compatible with you sexually feels very important to me. Ive still never dated anybody seriously off the site but I think I'm gonna give it a serious go this time instead of asking out acquaintances. I hate all the mystery about asking out girls you have only had one conversation with at a bar/party. Anybody else feel the same way?
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
Smiley90 said:
Why would you even submit that there... There's probably all the guys downvoting other guys to eliminate competition :lol
Click to expand...

I only did it cause in OT there's a big thread with people uploading their photos, so i decided to take a pic and give it a shot. Some actually seem to have success so it cant be all downvotes.
 
S

Smiley90

Stop shitting on my team. Start shitting on my finger.
~Kinggi~ said:
Goddamn i just redid it based on feedback from this thread. >:
Click to expand...

Honestly I think the haircut is fine. The picture itself would be fine for a second picture, not the main one though. Main one should be a non-selfie where you're smiling...
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
I actually thought it was a good shot. But after the onslaught of hate from that website and the comments here, i think i just need to pack it up
 
S

Smiley90

Stop shitting on my team. Start shitting on my finger.
~Kinggi~ said:
I actually thought it was a good shot. But after the onslaught of hate from that website and the comments here, i think i just need to pack it up
Click to expand...

It IS a good picture :p You should definitely use it. I mean, I don't smile in my main profile pic either and it hasn't been a letdown in terms of responses. Just have at least one smiling picture and a non-selfie in one of your pics and it'll be good.
 
F

False Witness

Member
I actually like that picture. Haircut doesn't look very creepy either.

I wish I looked half as good as most of the profiles I've seen posted here. Then again, I've been relatively lucky enough... a little too lucky today, to be honest.
 
U

UFRA

Member
Wait I'm confused.

Kinggi, did you do that thing on OKC where you send in all your pics to get rated by other users to find your best photo?

Or is there really a website about beautiful people where you can get rated? lol
 
V

vatstep

This poster pulses with an appeal so broad the typical restraints of our societies fall by the wayside.
UFRA said:
Wait I'm confused.

Kinggi, did you do that thing on OKC where you send in all your pics to get rated by other users to find your best photo?

Or is there really a website about beautiful people where you can get rated? lol
Click to expand...
Ha, did you not notice the massive thread in the OT?
 
Z

Zod the Bear

Member
So I figure I'll give this another shot. Anyone mind giving me some profile criticism? Tried to rework it a bit from the last time I tried this since I didn't have any luck, but I could definitely use some profile tips. (Quote for link.)

 
B

butzopower

proud of his butz
Jzero said:
Any of you get shaky or twitchy when you're with a girl? Shit's embarrassing.
Click to expand...

Ya, I'm pretty anxious and this happens on first dates a lot for me. I've come to realize they probably don't notice. Do you notice them being nervous, because they probably are, too.
 
M

maxxpower

Member
Jzero said:
Any of you get shaky or twitchy when you're with a girl? Shit's embarrassing.
Click to expand...

Nope, I'm actually really comfortable around girls, considering the fact that I've never had a girlfriend. It's probably because when I talk to a girl I don't give a shit anymore since I know I'll get rejected anyway.
 
B

batbeg

Member
So a girl with no profile or information has messaged me thinking it would be cool to hang out. She's got a profile pic and looks cute and everything, I'm just not sure how best to approach a reply to someone that tells me so little about themselves. Should I ask her what she likes, or go straight into suggesting we hang out, or what?
 
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