I'd message you if you lived near me and didnt already know i was a fuckup! Unfortunately you wouldnt message me. So....congrats?
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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!
- Thread starter AlimNassor
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I'd message you if you lived near me and didnt already know i was a fuckup! Unfortunately you wouldnt message me. So....congrats?
I dunno, Tigger looking into my soul and killing me from within is a fairly big deal-breaker.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
Gonna have to agree with this.
Santa madre de dios!
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
No point going back to the well on failed attempts (five) months later, right?
Just change your profile picture, chances are they won't remember you.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
We're Facebook friends and we skyped before. I stopped pursuing when she made it clear to me she wasn't interested in a relationship.
Your argument is invalid.
You are honestly cute and have a nice profile (cause we are awesome)
...I am ...I don't know what would be a proper word. Perhaps shocked.
Even though I need to add that I think it is totally hilarious that you checked him out and that he looked your profile. I can see the lovestory of the century slowly boiling together.
I might be more of a good girl than people give me credit for. At least I don't really like alcohol that much and I am really picky about it.
So I was just tired, went to bed 3.40 am and now I am still tired and giggling at work. This is great.
Your link worked brilliantly well - and you look gorgeous! Hahah, even I could tap that.
...and don't think too badly of me. I knew the boys were going to comment on you if I could just make you post the link to here.
Now I'm the tired one. I don't get this comment.
Charlie McCarthy
Member
She was being nice.
She is basically saying that you thinking your not cute is completely wrong.
I might not be as logical as I could I suppose.
I was just referring to you saying that it is not even the best photo and yet there are girls checking out your profile alot meaning it is not just me thinking you are cute.
Edit,
Awww. Well, I was just being honest. Hahah, even though also saying that he is totally wrong with his thoughts what comes to his looks. So yes, you are correct.
I totally got that.
On a serious note, I honestly struggle to see how anyone can think I look 'cute' in that photo, aha. Well, I'm not going to complain - if it's bringing the ladies in, who am I to argue?
I think I need to quote myself so you are not that lost.I totally got that.
On a serious note, I honestly struggle to see how anyone can think I look 'cute' in that photo, aha. Well, I'm not going to complain - if it's bringing the ladies in, who am I to argue?
I have too many GIFs saved for my own good. I really should clear 'em out...
Anyway, visitors have died down and no messages since last night. I'm OK with this, though, the wheels are in motion (so to speak) now I just wait and see what happens.
Just to jump on the train: You are pretty.
It definitely is a good picture. Even if I can see the phone in the mirror. But you did well there regardless.
To be fair, I didn't state an answer, so technically I'm not being dishonest or misleading. Leaves something for discussion, too.
Not quite.
ThisWreckage
Banned
Wear your shortcomings and weaknesses as armor and you'll rule the world.
I think the last page or so details exactly why I have such an issue with dating in general. I'm a genuine, honest person and online dating seems to be more about how one can manipulate words and doctor one's profile into making one seem more attractive than they actually are. The people that are forthright with their life and personality seem to be the most refreshing because at least their profile doesn't read like a puff piece.
Your link worked brilliantly well - and you look gorgeous! Hahah, even I could tap that.
...and don't think too badly of me. I knew the boys were going to comment on you if I could just make you post the link to here.
Oh I see
Haha. It's cool.
It still stands that POF is boring now (I think that's where this started...). I'm not feeling like putting in the effort to get a message or two haha. Oh well. Maybe eventually I'll go at it again for a bit.
I love this new trend. We should make Leeness fan club.
I know quite many girls who are both funny and sarcastic. Awesome people do exist. I am sure of it... even though people who are both funny and sarcastic don't need to say they are funny and sarcastic. Anyways.
Cow Mengde
Banned
10/10. Too hot, would not bang.
Seriously, if you dialed your age up by a year and lived in New York, I would message the shit out of you. BTW, the picture all the way on the right, you should use that as your main picture. I really don't know where I'm suppose to focus my eyes.
I say this as someone who has nothing to gain by complimenting you.
To give a serious impression, I am not a big fan of be super zoomed in pictures (though Cow's comment on the last one has some validity). I would try to get more active picture and zoomed out pictures. Just my preference.
Really dug the profile's content. I would be interested in you for more than appearance after reading that.
So the majority of guys then?
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I've realized there is a significant problem (at least for me) having so much information about a woman upfront: it's easy to find a hang up. For example, once I saw a women who piqued my interest did not want children, I found her less desirable. I'm only 24 and have no plans for kids soon, but it is most definitely a future goal. My last girlfriend did not want children either, but three years ago I had not decided then.
I don't want to say it's a dealbreaker, but it is a concern for me. Going in knowing it cannot ever be serious due to this difference or the idea I'd have to sway her in order for it to potentially work out in the long term. I'm not interested in short-term dating, I just want to see how things develop, not set an end point.
I don't want to say it's a dealbreaker, but it is a concern for me. Going in knowing it cannot ever be serious due to this difference or the idea I'd have to sway her in order for it to potentially work out in the long term. I'm not interested in short-term dating, I just want to see how things develop, not set an end point.
GameplayWhore
Member
Huh. My sister just randomly decided to open up an okcupid account. Dad thinks it's dumb to use free sites when she could pay money for the ones that advertise that they're better (this was his actual argument). I've had lots of fun with okcupid in the past, though, so I encourage its use.
The really interesting thing is that I finally get to see what it's like to use a dating site from a girl's perspective. My sister acts like a regular guy, thinking that every profile she sees is too good for her to send a message, downplaying her positives, etc, which I thought was interesting -- from my own perspective, girls have a built-in advantage on these sites, often needing to grab a garden rake to beat away potential matches.
She's received several emails, and the family read them together. A lot of stereotypical Italians, perhaps because she's a car enthusiast. Nothing from animal lovers, which is a shame, because she's worked at zoos and done fostering of baby puffballs. But it's really kind of cool to read the message content and categorize people ("This guy's kind of an overconfident scumball, this other guy seems nice enough but obviously has sent so many personalized messages that he's given up and now basically sends out a form letter to every girl, etc, etc..").
Anyway, what are some good ideas I can give her to explore the site properly? I've already shown her how to fix the searching algorithm (by changing "special blend", which has been horrible for half a decade, to either "match" or "match & distance), and I've shown her oktrends. She already understands and enjoys the value of answering quizzes. Her profile (which I won't share here, sorry) is decent enough, but I want her to feel -- and maybe eventually get -- engaged.
[ As an interesting aside, although I'm totally good for now, this whole chatter makes me want to revise all my dating site profiles just to see how cool I can make myself sound (it helps that I'm growing trees, building furniture, brewing mead, and making a Robot Monster costume so's I can carry the lady around -- activities like that make me feel less boring). Or maybe I'll do that horrid thing that used to be popular on okc where a couple tries to crawl for single ladies for three-ways. ]
The really interesting thing is that I finally get to see what it's like to use a dating site from a girl's perspective. My sister acts like a regular guy, thinking that every profile she sees is too good for her to send a message, downplaying her positives, etc, which I thought was interesting -- from my own perspective, girls have a built-in advantage on these sites, often needing to grab a garden rake to beat away potential matches.
She's received several emails, and the family read them together. A lot of stereotypical Italians, perhaps because she's a car enthusiast. Nothing from animal lovers, which is a shame, because she's worked at zoos and done fostering of baby puffballs. But it's really kind of cool to read the message content and categorize people ("This guy's kind of an overconfident scumball, this other guy seems nice enough but obviously has sent so many personalized messages that he's given up and now basically sends out a form letter to every girl, etc, etc..").
Anyway, what are some good ideas I can give her to explore the site properly? I've already shown her how to fix the searching algorithm (by changing "special blend", which has been horrible for half a decade, to either "match" or "match & distance), and I've shown her oktrends. She already understands and enjoys the value of answering quizzes. Her profile (which I won't share here, sorry) is decent enough, but I want her to feel -- and maybe eventually get -- engaged.
[ As an interesting aside, although I'm totally good for now, this whole chatter makes me want to revise all my dating site profiles just to see how cool I can make myself sound (it helps that I'm growing trees, building furniture, brewing mead, and making a Robot Monster costume so's I can carry the lady around -- activities like that make me feel less boring). Or maybe I'll do that horrid thing that used to be popular on okc where a couple tries to crawl for single ladies for three-ways. ]
Confused101
Member
Does not compute. As myself and others have already stated the obvious, how is this the situation that you're in? I'm baffled that you're not clearing out your mailbox every other day because it's full. BAFFLED!
Also, for those that have recently posted their OKC profiles, I rated you 5 stars. Best of luck out there!
Cow Mengde
Banned
Sometimes our surrounding may not be all that flattering (like messy bedrooms) so some like it cropped in.
I hear about these hot girls with self esteem issues and this is my first time "meeting" one so to speak. It really baffle me how they end up getting a bad image of themselves.
Yup, being down to earth is great. It seems like almost every girl is trying to make themselves sound as exciting as possible. Sometimes I can't help but roll my eyes at some of the shit they write in their profile.
electricshake
Member
My crappy self image stems mainly from my poor luck with men. It's definitely not my personality (I have loads of friends and a great social life) so it must be my looks. I'm sure plenty of other girls feel the same.
OriginofHysteria
Banned
I forgot how addicting this site is. I made a profile with no pics and hardly any info and ive already gotten messages back from other girls (albeit not really looking but its just fun).
I wanna try making a profile thats just absolutely disgusting and makes me seem like a horrible guy and see what happens.
I wanna try making a profile thats just absolutely disgusting and makes me seem like a horrible guy and see what happens.
What's a good way to get the conversation going? Sometimes I send a message and get SUCH flat reply or hard to keep it flowing. I had one reply, she told me her name, asked how I was, seemed positive enough, and then a 2 sentence reply the next time. I've noticed a lot do that though, even ones who message me first. Or should I just go for the date after very few messages?
Damn dude why don't you just rub it in lol. Perhaps I should just try the same thing, maybe I'll get better results.
Haha. You're funny
Mine is weight (still working on it...and been really bad lately
...) and zero experience with men. Been on like...a couple first dates, a (really nice) three dates with one guy, and that's the ~best~ I've ever done. Makes me way too nervous, and my own (stupid) sexual repression is so bad. Haha. Ah well. At this point, finding a guy friend who likes to hug me and sit around with his arm around me while we watch movies would be awesome And thank you, the rest of you, with your silly compliments.
OriginofHysteria
Banned
Haha well I figured that girls will always go for the picture first and they probably always get the same message. So what I did was send something completely out of the ordinary (in my case it was the bacon pancakes song from adventure time) and i actually got quite a bit of responses. Obviously they all asked why no pic and i made up some excuse that theyre on my phone, we message a bit so they get to know my personality more than looks.
This site is weird and theres no specific formula for getting people to talk to you but it worked for me. I actually went out with someone too.
Just to echo what's already been said -- I'm sure you'll do great. If I weren't a couple provinces over I'd message you myself. Good luck!
Well, what am I supposed to put?
I hate how I look and I apparently can't get the description right without sounding like a dick. It's pretty fucking hopeless, really.
Just got back from the mini-golf date. Overall date was decent. I went in with my chirpy, happy-go-lucky persona. I was pretty much myself (though I contained a little bit of my crazy, but not by much). The first half of the date went well; she and I spoke about random stuff, 50/50 about her and my life.
But something happened during the latter half of the date where she became less talkative. Not really sure what happened either. She and I had to leave early due to later plans. We hugged, both said we had a good time, and went our separate ways.
I would give her another chance, but the last half was a little bit of a bummer in terms of good conversations. So, if she's interested in me, I'll let her make the first move. Other than that, I shall continue to sail the sea and catching new fishes.
Leeness, you're not overweight; your body type is the epitome of average.
But something happened during the latter half of the date where she became less talkative. Not really sure what happened either. She and I had to leave early due to later plans. We hugged, both said we had a good time, and went our separate ways.
I would give her another chance, but the last half was a little bit of a bummer in terms of good conversations. So, if she's interested in me, I'll let her make the first move. Other than that, I shall continue to sail the sea and catching new fishes.
Leeness, you're not overweight; your body type is the epitome of average.
Try OriginofHysteria's approach, you never know, it might work.
Oh I see
Haha. It's cool.
You would be surprised. Honestly, nearly every female I know, myself included, have or at least have had some sort of body image problems for a reason or another.
For example my previous co-worker, who is seriously dead drop gorgeous, has been cheated on by every one of her boyfriends and husband and they have told her that she is so damn ugly they didn't have any choice. And I don't say I would be "a hot girl", but even when I was actually young and way more fit than I am nowadays and I looked honestly quite alright (based on me looking at the old photos) I felt totally shitty. Nowadays when I have gained more weight and I don't look as good as I used to, I am still way more confident about myself. I work out not to look good, but to actually be healthy and if someone doesn't like my looks, I have decided it is their problem, not mine. Like said, even if I don't think I am especially beautiful and me getting in shape is a work in process, I am still all in all starting to be happy with myself. Hahah, perhaps I am becoming experienced and old enough not to care.
Lol. What I have read your profiles, I would say that you boys are trying to do the same.
I am being totally honest, your body looks amazing and I need to admit I am somewhat jealous. You good girl stop worrying about your looks and your weight right now. I have also noticed that women pay way more attention to their bodies than they should. Men don't really look the negative part and mainly concentrade on the good things on your looks. Seriously, trust me on this one. There are of course couple douchey lads here and there, but they are not the majority. Most men I know are absolute sweethearts and will do their very best to make you feel good.Mine is weight (still working on it...and been really bad lately
Just try to avoid the cocky bastards and you will do just fine. If you think the guy is not being sincere and pretends to be a bad ass, you can always ask is he just trying to act all tough cause he is unsecure or is he just really a douchey idiot. Just make the question sound like a joke.
I myself would always pick a good guy over the "cool guy". Plus once the nice lads feel confident enough they are according to my limited experience quite beasts in bed.
I am sure you will find some awesome little kitty for yourself. Just remember that you are in no rush to anywhere. Also you are so nice that you most likely have loads of friends, but if you anyways want to talk about anything or have some particular questions in mind you don't want to share on the forums don't hesitate to send me a PM any time.
Like I have stated before in here
(I am fairly sure you have ignored them knowingly which is totally fine)
I just think that some people might be unsecure about themselves. They are perhaps thinking that are they charming enough to find a date, are they interesting enough to stand from the masses or are they good looking enough to make someone interested. When they are scared cause they think they might not meet some expectations that they imagine other people will have, they might try to hide it with false confidence. If they don't sound good enough to their own ears I can imagine that they start to colour the image a bit.
It is a very humane thing to do since it actually requires quite much to write a profile that would be interesting, silly and sincere since it is basicly an advertisement about oneself and one would of course want to sound as good as humanly possible.
I think that that kind of photos are the same as shirtless pics for men. When you have something to show, the pics will work amazingly well. Then again you need to decide what kind of attention you want to get.
I am fairly sure that your main photo influences quite much the decision will other people even bother to read your profile and they will certainly make assumptions based on the selected picture. I am now going to spam couple links to make my point clear. Bear with me. Just going to make them links so this doesn't end up being too heavy post.
If I would see profile images like this I would be stereotypically thinking the following.
Most likely highly photoshopped image, soulless cold bitch.
Yeah, fat.
Fucking attention whore. Can you put those tits somewhere else, please.
How damn desperate. A selfie bathroom photo. Really?
Quite neutral. She actually might have a job.
So when you pick the photo, be wise and think what kind of messages you actually want to send and what kind of company are you trying to lure.
What comes to Leeness' photos, I would keep the mentioned pic in there, but I wouldn't perhaps make it the main one. Of course it depends what kind of company she wants. If she just wants to fuck, then yes, that would be perfect. If she is looking for something more permanent, I wouldn't most likely change the order.
Damn.
Not quite.
-tetsuo-
Unlimited Capacity
So every man ever, then.
Cow Mengde
Banned
All the stuff in my profile is true though. I mean, I'm not saying guys aren't lying. I'm sure they lie just as much. I mean, this is the internet after all.
stn
Member
Guys, no need to pounce on Cyanide Strike, lol. Anyway, Cyanide - I would make some more changes to your profile. For one, let the confidence flow naturally from your profile. You don't need to bluntly state "I have confidence."
Also, give yourself a picture that does not have any photoshop effects, or whatever that grey filter is. Women will assume you're hiding something about your looks. Make it obvious as to how you look.
Also, give yourself a picture that does not have any photoshop effects, or whatever that grey filter is. Women will assume you're hiding something about your looks. Make it obvious as to how you look.
Liu Kang Baking A Pie
Member
Not listing your height is just asking for no one to ever write you. That says so much about your insecurity with it.
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