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[Buckethead]

Do most of you use it for casual sex or finding more serious relationships?
A decent amount of girls have messaged me about the former, basically, but it seems like less people are interested in the latter.

Anyway, I deleted mine. Felt creepy spelling everything out.

 

[Power Glove]

Do most of you use it for casual sex or finding more serious relationships?
A decent amount of girls have messaged me about the former, basically, but it seems like less people are interested in the latter.

Anyway, I deleted mine. Felt creepy spelling everything out.

Exactly why I want to quit. The pervasiveness of horny people looking for quick action has put me off. I'm looking to find someone to build a relationship with but it seems like the girls I've met through okcupid just want to bang.

 

[Hylian7]

Exactly why I want to quit. The pervasiveness of horny people looking for quick action has put me off. I'm looking to find someone to build a relationship with but it seems like the girls I've met through okcupid just want to bang.

Seems like the exact opposite where I live.

Spoiler

Texas

 

[Surface of Me]

Seems like the exact opposite where I live.

Spoiler

Texas

I guess I wouldn't know, since no one responds to my messages, but that doesn't seem to be the thing where I live, also Tejas.

 

[Zomba13]

Lol, no one replies to my messages, I keep them short and try to start a conversation and only message people that share an interest with me and get nothing back. It's probably my profile or that I look kinda girly.
Just messaged someone who is a 90% match and whose profile makers her sound very similar to me (very similar likes etc). I have a feeling she won't reply though lol. Oh well, it's all good fun.

 

[Slycoopr]

Most of the girls don't reply to my messages, or reply and seem to want nothing to do with me. I haven't had a single decent conversation with anyone on these sites :/ Also, almost every girl who has messaged me has been overweight.

 

[Buckethead]

Exactly why I want to quit. The pervasiveness of horny people looking for quick action has put me off. I'm looking to find someone to build a relationship with but it seems like the girls I've met through okcupid just want to bang.

I don't care about that really. If you just want to get laid, fair enough.
Love can develop out of lust, too, I suppose.

I just don't like the "information dump" nature of these websites.

If you list your favorite things point-by-point, you're being thorough (most people aren't) but by doing so it encourages "shopping around" and discourages the natural courting process.
By that I mean that online dating prevents you from discovering mutual interests in a natural and organic manor, through the regular course of human interaction and verbal communication.

With digital/non-verbal communication; you can't see the person/how they react, detect their tone and inflection, or explore the depth of their knowledge as easily. You can't seduce or flirt as easily and thus prevents you from making a connection. Unless you're a good writer, you can't really inject too much charisma into non-verbals.

I don't know, it's convenient in a sense but in my experience, generally counter-productive to finding someone for a potential relationship.

 

[Biff]

I don't care about that really. If you just want to get laid, fair enough.
Love can develop out of lust, too, I suppose.

I just don't like the "information dump" nature of these websites.

If you list your favorite things point-by-point, you're being thorough (most people aren't) but by doing so it encourages "shopping around" and discourages the natural courting process.
By that I mean that online dating prevents you from discovering mutual interests in a natural and organic manor, through the regular course of human interaction and verbal communication.

With digital/non-verbal communication; you can't see the person/how they react, detect their tone and inflection, or explore the depth of their knowledge as easily. You can't seduce or flirt as easily and thus prevents you from making a connection. Unless you're a good writer, you can't really inject too much charisma into non-verbals.

I don't know, it's convenient in a sense but in my experience, generally counter-productive to finding someone for a potential relationship.

I agree with all of the above. That's why it's so crucial to take the interaction offline ASAP.

The longer you spend online, the longer the other side has to over-analyze every word you write, or creep you online trying to find out more about you.

OKC and POF should be tools used to begin a conversation, not carry it on for weeks.

 

[Hylian7]

I agree with all of the above. That's why it's so crucial to take the interaction offline ASAP.

The longer you spend online, the longer the other side has to over-analyze every word you write, or creep you online trying to find out more about you.

OKC and POF should be tools used to begin a conversation, not carry it on for weeks.

Adding onto that, if the date doesn't go well, you probably made a new friend. You are reaching out of your comfort zone.

 

[OJdaKiller]

Adding onto that, if the date doesn't go well, you probably made a new friend.

For an initial date to "go well" you just have to have a good time/get along. If you can't do that with the person, why would you want to be their friend if you can't have a good time with them?

I've gone on numerous dates with women from different dating sites. Being their friend is silly as you're somehow trying to hold out for more. If you can't get along or enjoy one another's company, suggesting that you can regress to friendship ("just friends") is fooling both of you as there was no friendship there to begin with.

 

[Caturro]

Adding onto that, if the date doesn't go well, you probably made a new friend. You are reaching out of your comfort zone.

This. Unless you are a total asshole, worst case scenario you have a new person to hang out with.

I got my first date through okcupid. She's 8 years older than me but looks like a fun gal.

 

[Hylian7]

For an initial date to "go well" you just have to have a good time/get along. If you can't do that with the person, why would you want to be their friend if you can't have a good time with them?

I've gone on numerous dates with women from different dating sites. Being their friend is silly as you're somehow trying to hold out for more. If you can't get along or enjoy one another's company, suggesting that you can regress to friendship ("just friends") is fooling both of you as there was no friendship there to begin with.

Let me rephrase. By "go well", I meant actually want to go on more dates, etc. You may not think you would want to be in a relationship with them possibly, but you meet new people.

 

[.GqueB.]

About a month on okcupid. My experience so far:

I started off as one of those types who would read a profile, send a message that related to something they mentioned and hope for the best. But it got tiresome. I've since just sent messages that say something along the lines off:

I like your face. I wanna take you out.

Or

I enjoy you. Let's go somewhere tomorrow.

I've had a lot more luck with the second method especially this week (3rd date on saturday). Not sure why exactly as it goes against what one would expect. Even a friend of mine on okc answered a message like this because she said it made her curious. So I've learned quickly that sending custom messages tends to be kind of a waste of time. Note I'm not saying its completely useless. It obviously works sometimes but not as often as it should.

It's definitely all about the profile as someone said pages ago. I try my best not to sound like other dudes which is easy since everyone has the most cliche profiles possible. Men and women alike. It seems every woman likes 30 rock, traveling, avocados and works for a non profit. All these profiles start reading exactly the same. I say instead of trying to sell yourself, sell your personality. This may not make sense, but I find that people spend too much time trying to sound good on paper.

And another thing, write your profile and messages in a fashion where you attract the person you actually want. I also started off trying to sound generally attractive. Attracted a lot of women I've found boring. Be picky. They are.

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

Exactly why I want to quit. The pervasiveness of horny people looking for quick action has put me off. I'm looking to find someone to build a relationship with but it seems like the girls I've met through okcupid just want to bang.

There are many many men who would love the problem you have.

Also thinking about trying form letters. I've just about tried everything else.

 

[RedAssedApe]

There are many many men who would love the problem you have.

Also thinking about trying form letters. I've just about tried everything else.

Brute force baby. Just send every single girl on the site in your city radius the same message. I'd be curious to find out how many reply. Considering the ladies receive so many messages its hard to believe that they don't simply just look at pics/age/height and completely ignore the contents of the message.

I think GAF should work together to create one all encompassing form letter and then we all collectively bombard the ladies around us. LOL

 

[Bleepey]

Exactly why I want to quit. The pervasiveness of horny people looking for quick action has put me off. I'm looking to find someone to build a relationship with but it seems like the girls I've met through okcupid just want to bang.

Please, post your profile, i wanna see what you wrote so that i can have your problem. Oh i think i need to brute force the shit out of this site. Have a template, based on various interests like obscure books by my favourite author and just send it to everyone in my city.

 

[Power Glove]

There are many many men who would love the problem you have.

Maybe if they're really young or desperate. I can't even enjoy meaningless sex like I used to anymore, it takes me forever to finish. I've had my fun and am ready to settle.

 

[Hylian7]

Okay, so I just realized there is apparently no status options other than "Single", "Seeing Someone", and "Married". I've been on a few dates with a girl lately, so I changed it to "seeing someone", that was the right call, right? I would think that's what "seeing someone" means, but then it hit me that there's no "In a relationship" option. Do most people agree with me on what "seeing someone" according to the site actually means? Have I fucked myself over here?

 

[Sp3eD]

The only status your account should go from is single to deleted. I personally think you may have made a huge mistake.

 

[lush]

Please. If that's a "huge mistake", then whatever you currently have going wasn't going to work out anyways.

Should be good. What do I know though?

 

[ameratsu]

Hmph, made an okc account only to find out there are very few girls my age in my area (Canadian City with <300k people). Think I am going to try pof as well.

edit: Yep, may more people use pof. Must be a regional thing.

 

[iAmMaximus]

How should I go about long-distance (100 miles) with a girl that just got out of a relationship and is looking to just make friends. I've been talking to her via IM for nearly 2-3 hrs for the past 3 days, but not sure exactly how to approach this.

 

[Hylian7]

The only status your account should go from is single to deleted. I personally think you may have made a huge mistake.

Please. If that's a "huge mistake", then whatever you currently have going wasn't going to work out anyways.

Should be good. What do I know though?

I thought about it more and this is just me getting paranoid. It can't possibly be a "huge mistake" even if she noticed, and if it is, lush is right, it wouldn't work out anyway.

 

[Mecha_Infantry]

Well I messages a girl, she replied after a couple of days (so long I actually forgot I sent it!). So we send messages back and forth for about 3 days, about 12 messages. I was getting fed up with no offline interaction so I gamer her my number

Lol I didn't hear from her for like 3 days and I did the wrong thing in messaging her to see if "everything is still cool", got nothing until she txt me yesterday and sent a message on OKC. But since then she been random with the texts. Just got one off her this morning

I'm wondering if it's worth trying to keep up with her. I tend to only date one chick at once so finding a new girl might be a bit of work

 

[RedAssedApe]

Hmph, made an okc account only to find out there are very few girls my age in my area (Canadian City with <300k people). Think I am going to try pof as well.

edit: Yep, may more people use pof. Must be a regional thing.

Makes sense considering POF is based out of Vancouver.

I'm wondering if it's worth trying to keep up with her. I tend to only date one chick at once so finding a new girl might be a bit of work

Ask her to meet up. If she doesn't respond positively to that invitation start talking to other girls.

I thought about it more and this is just me getting paranoid. It can't possibly be a "huge mistake" even if she noticed, and if it is, lush is right, it wouldn't work out anyway.

I always thought of "Seeing Someone" as the equivalent of "In a Relationship". It might imply exclusivity. Some people don't like it especially if you've only gone on a few dates. She may very well be dating other guys (which always seems to be the case in my OKC experience LOL). Unless she calls you her boyfriend already of course.

 

[Mecha_Infantry]

Ask her to meet up. If she doesn't respond positively to that invitation start talking to other girls.

Did so and it was positive!

So gotta think of something to do before I reply back to her

 

[Buckethead]

How should I go about long-distance (100 miles) with a girl that just got out of a relationship and is looking to just make friends. I've been talking to her via IM for nearly 2-3 hrs for the past 3 days, but not sure exactly how to approach this.

You should never talk to her again.

It's going to be awhile before she's ready to date again.
Sounds like you're already friend-zoned.

Doesn't sound like fun to me but if thankless one-way friendship is your thing... have at it.

 

[soul creator]

lol, just saw this on someone's profile, and it made me crack up

DISCLAIMER: do NOT message me if you...
* are under the age of 28
* drive a mustang
* live in mesquite, euless, or bedford
* live with parents
* wear more hair product than me
* have never been in a relationship lasting minimum 2 years
* are overweight/out of shape/do not care about your body
* practice any sort of religion faithfully
* play video games as a hobby
* have bushy facial hair
* do not have a job
* do not have at minimum 24 hours of college credit
* are vegan or strictly vegetarian, unless it's only temporary for health reasons
* actually enjoy fast food when sober
* smoke more than 5 cigarettes a day
* are a pothead
* are older than 42
* have never travelled outside of the continental US
* are a douchebag
* do not love dinosaurs
* do not have more than 3 photos
* do not have a photo showing your eyes
* have a bathroom mirror shot of your abs
* think that i'm interested even though you don't fall within the majority of my requirements (see above: "i don't need you")

I guess she uh, knows what she wants.

Spoiler

I have a 95% match rating with her

 

[lush]

She sounds hot. Message her, check each one off and comment. Lord knows I would.....

Emphasis on dinosaurs.

 

[Devolution]

I got an OKC message recently that asked if I reddit or go on 4chan.

 

[lush]

I got an OKC message recently that asked if I reddit or go on 4chan.

That's an insta-delete right there.

 

[-PXG-]

I got an OKC message recently that asked if I reddit or go on 4chan.

The ultimate one is if they ask if you post on GAF.

 

[Devolution]

The ultimate one is if they ask if you post on GAF.

I've already come up in some gaffers "you might like."

 

[ameratsu]

Sorry if this has been answered, but I got an email saying my account was "approved". What does that mean?

edit: Seems it means people can find me on there now.

 

[decaf]

.

 

[ComputerMKII]

I hope this person doesn't browse NeoGAF but...

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Z3Z4Baby

Am I the only one who thinks there is something wrong with her profile? Like, all of it? Jesus.

 

[kingslunk]

lol, just saw this on someone's profile, and it made me crack up



I guess she uh, knows what she wants.

Spoiler

I have a 95% match rating with her

"I don't play video games as a hobby... I play them as a career"

 

[Vincent Alexander]

lol, just saw this on someone's profile, and it made me crack up



I guess she uh, knows what she wants.

Spoiler

I have a 95% match rating with her

Link to profile please. Extremely interested and I love dinosaurs.

 

[teh_pwn]

The more requirements a girl gives to message her, the crazier she is. More than 5 bullet points means stay away.

 

[lush]

I hope this person doesn't browse NeoGAF but...

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Z3Z4Baby

Am I the only one who thinks there is something wrong with her profile? Like, all of it? Jesus.

Call her out on her spelling mistakes.

 

[Kyoufu]

The more requirements a girl gives to message her, the crazier she is. More than 5 bullet points means stay away.

Lol those requirements are making my crazy meter go off the charts. Avoid!

 

[ameratsu]

I hope this person doesn't browse NeoGAF but...

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Z3Z4Baby

Am I the only one who thinks there is something wrong with her profile? Like, all of it? Jesus.

That's ridiculous.

Strangely absent from hers is the "doesn't play video games as a hobby" requirement that I've seen on a few other lists. It seems like such an oddly specific thing to have as a dealbreaker, but casting their net of exclusion wider than necessary is to discourage people they see as particularly unfit to date. Though maybe it's like online job listings where they put more stringent requirements in the ad than they actually expect to get.

 

[TheKyle07]

I hope this person doesn't browse NeoGAF but...

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Z3Z4Baby

Am I the only one who thinks there is something wrong with her profile? Like, all of it? Jesus.

Spoiler

Make your own: http://memegenerator.net/Z3z4baby

I also laugh at women who describe themselves as "a little old-fashioned" only when it comes to expecting men to put in all the effort starting a relationship.

 

[Pachimari]

I have absolutely no luck with this. I have been rated 4/5-star once, had like 10 visits and gotten the usual mails of "you are hot" which I believe are only promotional but no messages at all.

Good that I'm only using this for fun.

 

[Devolution]

Hey guys you know what's a great idea turning this thread into a let's shit on profiles, link them and create MEMEs based on their pics. Really helps to generate an air of maturity in here.

 

[Power Glove]

Hey guys you know what's a great idea turning this thread into a let's shit on profiles, link them and create MEMEs based on their pics. Really helps to generate an air of maturity in here.

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

I got an OKC message recently that asked if I reddit or go on 4chan.

Why the hell do you have an OKC account? You're attractive.

 

[Devolution]

Why the hell do you have an OKC account? You're attractive.

A King of the Hill reference and a Dale av? Awesome.

I have one for shits and giggles when it comes to seeing how I "okc match" up with people. I thought about taking it down but I get too good of a message every once and a while despite the "seeing someone."

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

A King of the Hill reference and a Dale av? Awesome.

I have one for shits and giggles when it comes to seeing how I "okc match" up with people. I thought about taking it down but I get too good of a message every once and a while despite the "seeing someone."

Ah, I see. You must get some interesting/weird/perverted/awkward messages.


You're the second person that likes my username and avatar.

 

[Devolution]

Ah, I see. You must get some interesting/weird/perverted/awkward messages.


You're the second person that likes my username and avatar.

You should use some Dale-isms just to mess with some people who don't know KotH.