Welp, I've been seeing a girl and we both decided to deactivate our accounts. We've only known each other for a couple weeks but there was a crazy amount of chemistry from our first messages onwards. I basically stopped looking at other girls on the site after our first date, which is kinda how I knew she was special. I guess I won at online dating.
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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!
- Thread starter AlimNassor
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God Dayumm
Banned
Ok, a girl replied on a message that she doesn't do much during winter because she hates the cold and prefers to hibernate. Should I tell her I want to hibernate next to her? The convo is not going much anywhere so I might just drop the bomb right now. What say GAF?
depths20XX
Member
Sure, why not? Doesn't sound like you have much to lose in asking.
After two days of chatting with this really cute Russian girl, I asked if she wanted to see Catching Fire since she brought it up that she wanted to see it.
I moved on. Good choice?
Why didn't you suggest doing that after her finals? Seems pretty shitty to say "yeah, I understad how it is with finals" and then just bail out, if you ask me. She seems genuine.
Proelite
Member
She purposely didn't reply to my first invite until the weekend was passed. The "maybe later" part also sounds iffy. There is no enthusiasm at all.
I like it better when I get flat out rejected.
Buckethead
Banned
I personally wouldn't read too far into semantics. Maybe could mean a lot of things. Maybe she's going home to visit family and doesn't want to commit when she could cancel later. Maybe she's being cute.
If you don't feel that much chemistry or desire to get to know her, move on.
Hard to gauge tone and interest over teh internets, imo.
Follow that line and you'll do well in life.
If you don't feel that much chemistry or desire to get to know her, move on.
Hard to gauge tone and interest over teh internets, imo.
My 6th grade english teacher once told me that my essays should be like girl's skirts - long enough to cover but short enough to be interesting.
Follow that line and you'll do well in life.
Being busy is code for not being interested. If she was really interested in hanging out with him, she would have made time. When I was on the site a girl mentioning being busy in her messages was a massive red flag, cuz it meant she had no interest in ever meeting up.
megamerican
Member
Congratulations man.
UnObtainium17
Member
are you srrious.. She was even the first on to suggestif they can meet after finals. I say go for it.
Perspicacity
Banned
Wait what...
This was a whole lot of information that she didn't ask for without any real hook. As Shakespeare said, Brevity is the soul of wit - or better yet, Action is eloquence. Why would you ever tell someone that you were sarcastic or that you're a great cook/photographer? If that's what you want them to know about you then demonstrate it.
Not if it is finals week. Even if I was interested in meeting someone, I always hid myself away during dead week and the actual week of finals.
I'd agree normally but in this instance it doesn't seem that clear-cut to me. Giving her the benefit of the doubt is worth a shot.
DoctorButt
Member
How much stock do you guys put in a girl's age range? I msg'd a girl with her age range at 23-26 (she's 24 and I'm 21). The message was a little on the long side but her profile said she enjoyed discussions so I went with it. She actually sent back 3 paragraphs herself, the last paragraph being this,
"As for museums, I mostly know ones for art- MFAH is amazing, as is The Menil- plus, it's always free. Then there's the Health Museum that's actually kind of fun and interesting and more off the wall ones like The Orange Show and the National Museum of Funeral History- though I haven't been to it yet, it looks pretty awesome."
I sent her a message replying to her other points and asking her further questions to keep the conversation going. Then 2 hours later I just said to myself "fuck it" and sent her another message inviting her to go to the National Museum of Funeral History with me on saturday at 1. Hope I didn't screw the pooch on this one.
"As for museums, I mostly know ones for art- MFAH is amazing, as is The Menil- plus, it's always free. Then there's the Health Museum that's actually kind of fun and interesting and more off the wall ones like The Orange Show and the National Museum of Funeral History- though I haven't been to it yet, it looks pretty awesome."
I sent her a message replying to her other points and asking her further questions to keep the conversation going. Then 2 hours later I just said to myself "fuck it" and sent her another message inviting her to go to the National Museum of Funeral History with me on saturday at 1. Hope I didn't screw the pooch on this one.
DoctorButt
Member
fuzzyreactor
Banned
Don't do it. Virgin sex is never good and she'll just become psycho attached to you afterward.
I repeat, don't do it
I repeat, don't do it
megamerican
Member
Are you attracted to her?
She has sent me tons of nudes. She's ok. The thing is that I don't feel to comfortable "taking her virginity" away. After all, she is my plan B, and I don't wanna be an asshole and just use her for sex.
not always true. I had virgin sex with a girl recently. It was good, and we actually broke up on pretty good terms a week later.
edit: you know in retrospect I got off pretty fuckin' lucky..... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
jamesinclair
Banned
megamerican
Member
Yeah sounds like you should let her down easy.
jamesinclair
Banned
On further discussion, Im going to have to see those nudes to advise on the proper course of action.
Is it because she's in so much pain or is there just a lot of blood? Never taken a girl's virginity so I'm curious.
Q
Queen of Hunting
Unconfirmed Member
been a couple of weeks a small update, the girl from badoo. im still seeing been going great, seems like a found a keeper so to speak, really happy
Cow Mengde
Banned
Pop it dude. Pop it good.
Cow Mengde
Banned
Oops, double posted due to error.
jamesinclair
Banned
Both.
Lots of starts and stops.
And then once things finally get going 6 hours later, it sucks because she has no idea what to do.
Especially if you want to save your sheets "hold on babe, got to get these in cold water asap"
Virgin sex is a tricky thing, esp. if it involves someone online.
Since she's your plan B, I'd at least make it known that you're not looking for a relationship or some bullshit. As long as both parties participate knowing all the cards are on the table, then I'd say proceed at your own free will.
But personally, I'm with the others. I don't like being anyone's first anymore, after a bad experience.
Do it. I want to hear the story of the aftermath of when she attempts to murder you afterwards. :-D
electricshake
Member
Just had a guy I went to school with rate me highly. Don't know if he recognised me, it's been almost 10 years.
EatinOlives
Member
I don't think online dating is a thing for me. Granted I've been at this a couple of weeks, but I can tell this isn't going to work. I mean, I'm looking at profiles, answering questions and sending thoughtful-but-not-long messages, but there's so many flaws with this whole environment I don't know if I'm willing to wade through all this shit to find someone.
First there's the obvious that everyone already complains about., the whole "send tons of tailored messages to countless people and hope one of them bothers to respond", wading through tons of "omg no hookups lol" even though you and they know they're only looking for one, the typical 4-5 messages before dropping off the face of the earth stuff. None of that is what really bothers me. It's a weird song-and-dance unlike anything that remotely resembles in-person interaction, but I can see it working. What really bothers me is that on top of all of that^ I have extra shit of my own.
I'm in a conservative college town, and in 10 years I see myself moving somewhere up north with someone in or near my field of profession. That alone eliminates tons of people, because many, many women are interested in staying more or less in their area. Not to mention wading through the college clubbing girls. The size and college-town nature of my area means options are slim, I already feel I've exhausted all possibilities just within a few weeks.
I think I'm better off doing old-fashioned IRL dating/finding people, which is obviously much, much harder, but between the typical online dating annoyances and my particular restrictions I feel like I'm wasting tons of time looking for someone who simply isn't there. Honestly I think I'm better off waiting until I graduate (many, many years from now), move into whatever city I'm ready to settle in, and then look for someone in that area and profession. Maybe.
First there's the obvious that everyone already complains about., the whole "send tons of tailored messages to countless people and hope one of them bothers to respond", wading through tons of "omg no hookups lol" even though you and they know they're only looking for one, the typical 4-5 messages before dropping off the face of the earth stuff. None of that is what really bothers me. It's a weird song-and-dance unlike anything that remotely resembles in-person interaction, but I can see it working. What really bothers me is that on top of all of that^ I have extra shit of my own.
I'm in a conservative college town, and in 10 years I see myself moving somewhere up north with someone in or near my field of profession. That alone eliminates tons of people, because many, many women are interested in staying more or less in their area. Not to mention wading through the college clubbing girls. The size and college-town nature of my area means options are slim, I already feel I've exhausted all possibilities just within a few weeks.
I think I'm better off doing old-fashioned IRL dating/finding people, which is obviously much, much harder, but between the typical online dating annoyances and my particular restrictions I feel like I'm wasting tons of time looking for someone who simply isn't there. Honestly I think I'm better off waiting until I graduate (many, many years from now), move into whatever city I'm ready to settle in, and then look for someone in that area and profession. Maybe.
Charlie McCarthy
Member
I agree with your whole post but the sentence I bolded is spot on. Its a great way to put it.
I think the people that will be the most disappointed with online dating is those looking for something long-term. I'm not saying it can't happen but online dating really can be a "quantity over quality" thing. It doesn't replace trying to meet women in the real world, but for me I only really meet women at clubs and it not like that happens everytime I go out. I have never been a guy to "day game", even though I have seen potential opportunities, so my options are pretty limited as a single 33 year old guy, so I just see online dating as a great supplement and treat it with a real "don't care" attitude, which I can understand is difficult for a lot of guys, including me at one stage.
In GAF's collective experience, if a girl messages you first, what are the odds of something actually happening?
Woke up this morning to find a couple of messages from some pretty decently cute girls who I don't think I even looked at/rated their profiles. I'm trying to keep my expectations in check, but who knows.
And in other news, some crazy hot chick I met at a party this weekend sent me a friend request on FB, but I'm too paranoid that she's not really interested, and just wants to +1 the friend count. Why are girls so scary?
Woke up this morning to find a couple of messages from some pretty decently cute girls who I don't think I even looked at/rated their profiles. I'm trying to keep my expectations in check, but who knows.
And in other news, some crazy hot chick I met at a party this weekend sent me a friend request on FB, but I'm too paranoid that she's not really interested, and just wants to +1 the friend count. Why are girls so scary?
Higher than if you were the one messaging them.
So I should go ahead and run to Costco and get a 1000 count box of condoms? Got it.
megamerican
Member
Last two girls that messaged me recently resulted in successful dates. Be careful, these types can be crazy clingy.
I'm guessing crazy hot girls probably don't need to worry about their Facebook friend level. I would assume she is at least somewhat interested, or that she thinks you're cool.
Just found my first crazy person. Note the timestamps
avatar quote
Negatron
edit: She followed up with this:
"What?"
"If that sounded like a sex invite it wasn't"
megamerican
Member
Was that girl trying to neg you? Probably a typo but either way she is clearly fucked.
Neg me?
megamerican
Member
Yeah, lol it's a thing I learned from this thread. Mainly guys that are into the pickup scene will insult the person they are trying to hit on. I guess the logic is you are bringing their self confidence down or something.
The comment she made about "you aren't cute and ex-military" falls in that type of thing. But like I said I think it's probably a typo.
Oh. I don't think it was a typo. Girl looks legit fucking crazy to me.
In other potam news, I added the crazy hot chick on FB and she immediately liked/commented on a picture, so woowoo
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