Isn't that the point of meeting in public places? I don't know why someone would think it's a good idea for a first date to be them ganging up with their friends in a personal setting against you. Personally, I wouldn't have gone either. It's a real gamble for house parties if you don't know someone there.
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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!
- Thread starter AlimNassor
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Isn't that the point of meeting in public places? I don't know why someone would think it's a good idea for a first date to be them ganging up with their friends in a personal setting against you. Personally, I wouldn't have gone either. It's a real gamble for house parties if you don't know someone there.
Yea I was gonna come back and suggest taking a friend but I got caught up in a meeting.
That would work too.
So as she have said "see you later then. Hehe", as the last SMS, then I take it I should just wait for her to give the get go and if nothing comes from her then I could eventually txt her tomorrow, just do I don't come across as desperate or as pressuring.
Come to think of it, it could be she only want a friend. But then I don't understand why she says maybe a bf if she can find the right one and then suggesting me and her together in a funny way. It also came across as a bit desperate from her but it were only fun, maybe, with a hint in it. That's why I treat it as a date. But I haven't specifically said the word "first-date", so she's free to treat it as a non-date. But she sees OKC as a dating site.
Come to think of it, it could be she only want a friend. But then I don't understand why she says maybe a bf if she can find the right one and then suggesting me and her together in a funny way. It also came across as a bit desperate from her but it were only fun, maybe, with a hint in it. That's why I treat it as a date. But I haven't specifically said the word "first-date", so she's free to treat it as a non-date. But she sees OKC as a dating site.
We're gonna meet in 2 hours, bam I got butterflies in my stomach. I really don't know anywhere to go but I guess we could walk around while talking. I'm just wondering if at the end of it all if I should ask to follow her home or not, maybe she won't like me to know her place after only one day, even though she have already told her the street.. Maybe I could bring the car, or maybe take the bus.
And I don't have any 'real nice' clothes. I guess I'm gonna wear my white pants and just a black sweatshirt. I don't think it would be wrong to take one beer to calm myself.
Should I offer to pick her up or should we just meet in the city?
And I don't have any 'real nice' clothes. I guess I'm gonna wear my white pants and just a black sweatshirt. I don't think it would be wrong to take one beer to calm myself.
Should I offer to pick her up or should we just meet in the city?
My advice is to just act natural and try not to seem like your entire future and/or life depends on this interaction; you'll come across as trying too hard or taking things too seriously. Just relax.
But yeah, I think you should at least offer her. You're asking GAF for a bit too much advice though, lol. If you start posting on here in the bathroom while she's waiting outside or something, game over. :lol
But yeah, I think you should at least offer her. You're asking GAF for a bit too much advice though, lol. If you start posting on here in the bathroom while she's waiting outside or something, game over. :lol
Look up some places to go if you want. Mix it up some, don't stay at the one place all night. Meet in the city, a nice pub or bar could be good so you can have a drink or two then go to where ever you want after a bit of introduction. Don't ask to pick her up on a first date. Don't ask to "follow her home" either but if it all goes well you can ask if you can walk her home or drop her off.
Just chill out and act like you're talking to a friend then when you feel more comfortable flirt a bit too.
She won't know if I'm asking you guys while at the bathroom. =p
I'm gonna offer to pick her up, and then there won't be anywhere to park the car, I can just imagine it haha.
I offered her to go to a bar with games and drinks but she don't like it as she don't know the place.
Okay, I won't pick her up. I'm just gonna be friendly tonight. And just talk out of my ass and have fun. That's what I like best anyway. I'm gonna take the car to the city, just in case I want to drop her off.
If there's any Danes in here who lives in Copenhagen, then don't hesitate bringing up some places. I'm currently looking at a list here: http://mitkbh.dk/steder/
Maybe I could offer her some take-away, so we can walk at the walking street while eating those china-boxes.
I'm gonna offer to pick her up, and then there won't be anywhere to park the car, I can just imagine it haha.
I offered her to go to a bar with games and drinks but she don't like it as she don't know the place.
Okay, I won't pick her up. I'm just gonna be friendly tonight. And just talk out of my ass and have fun. That's what I like best anyway. I'm gonna take the car to the city, just in case I want to drop her off.
If there's any Danes in here who lives in Copenhagen, then don't hesitate bringing up some places. I'm currently looking at a list here: http://mitkbh.dk/steder/
Maybe I could offer her some take-away, so we can walk at the walking street while eating those china-boxes.
Stop over thinking. Nothing goes perfectly to plan, you just roll with it and laugh it off. If you keep cool, she'll forget the moment it's over and you're onto the next thing.
Maybe if you guys didn't consider the first time you meet someone as a "date" it wouldn't be so nerve wracking??
I would never consider a first meet from an online site as a date. It's a "get-to-know" session or "Are-we-compatible-because-it's-pretty-fucking-hard-to-tell-without-interacting-in-real-life-first."
I would never consider a first meet from an online site as a date. It's a "get-to-know" session or "Are-we-compatible-because-it's-pretty-fucking-hard-to-tell-without-interacting-in-real-life-first."
It's funny, because the last time I had a "first-date" back in 2009, I never ever considered it a date. Just me and her meeting up to have a good time together and be friends for that day. I think I'm gonna repeat that and just meet up in the city. I don't wanna over-do things, the one thing I can do is offer to drop her off on the way home.
What I'm unsure of though is, if I should pay for a little take-out if it comes to that. Because I used to be one who tells the girl that I pay for mine and she can pay for hers, but it just seems a bit rude also. On the other side, it was her who wanted to meet up this fast.
What I'm unsure of though is, if I should pay for a little take-out if it comes to that. Because I used to be one who tells the girl that I pay for mine and she can pay for hers, but it just seems a bit rude also. On the other side, it was her who wanted to meet up this fast.
Sounds good, good mindset.
I might be meeting my first chick from OKC this weekend.
I randomly meet my last GF from FB a few years ago, but that's the last time I met someone online before. Being nervous is understandable I guess however you approach things, but hopefully you can fall in that groove and just be chill.
I might be meeting my first chick from OKC this weekend.
I randomly meet my last GF from FB a few years ago, but that's the last time I met someone online before. Being nervous is understandable I guess however you approach things, but hopefully you can fall in that groove and just be chill.
It's just that I have these annoying butterflies in my stomach, stupid nervousness, but there's still 1.5 hours to go so I'll get to relax. I'm listening to music and drinking a beer, just chilling until then.
Yea, I met my (at the time) girlfriend on FB back in 2009, and we agreed to meet at a train station and then we actually went for my place and she wanted to have sex at the second "date", which caught me off guard as I was a virgin. Hopefully it'll be much more relaxed and slow this time around, I'm not in a hurry in any way. I'm just looking to have a good time, and then when she's more comfortable with me, then perhaps I can invite her to a bar again on an actual date someday.
It's just funny how all the standard questions arise in ones head. Will she like me? Will I like her? Will she think I'm ugly? Will we have a connection? What if the conversation ends? What if she wanna go home early? Should I do this and that? etc. I just wanna throw all of this mess out the window and say "Hi! How are you?".
Yea, I met my (at the time) girlfriend on FB back in 2009, and we agreed to meet at a train station and then we actually went for my place and she wanted to have sex at the second "date", which caught me off guard as I was a virgin. Hopefully it'll be much more relaxed and slow this time around, I'm not in a hurry in any way. I'm just looking to have a good time, and then when she's more comfortable with me, then perhaps I can invite her to a bar again on an actual date someday.
It's just funny how all the standard questions arise in ones head. Will she like me? Will I like her? Will she think I'm ugly? Will we have a connection? What if the conversation ends? What if she wanna go home early? Should I do this and that? etc. I just wanna throw all of this mess out the window and say "Hi! How are you?".
Not gonna lie... kind of want this to happen. I feel invested in this situation now.
shindoku21
Member
Play by play commentary. I'll be John Madden.
Anastacio, the only advice I'll give is to calm down and not over think things. I just finished reading this thread: [Help!] The Girl I Like Won't Respond to My Emails (´･ω･`) and I'm not saying you're like the OP, but I'm getting that vibe.
She's already interested in you so really, just try and have a good time. See where things go, and don't worry so much.
She's already interested in you so really, just try and have a good time. See where things go, and don't worry so much.
Charmicarmicat
Banned
I think I'm done with this site. I figured the worst that would happen would be that nothing would come from it. Turns out the worst is actually getting no responses from people, at all, and having what little confidence I have taken away.
So I got a reply from that girl I used to know and came across on a dating site. It was basically "OMG wow weird! Please don't tell anyone I use this site[not that I speak to anyone from back then, I hated like 90% of them]. I just joined and not sure what to think yet. Have you met anyone from it? Looking great buddy. Hows your life been since we last met?"
So I guess it's good I got a reply. I don't like "buddy" bit though. I've always considered that word in the "friends only" code. Anyway, I might send one more reply asking how she's been and if she replies to that ask her out for a drink or dinner or something.
So I guess it's good I got a reply. I don't like "buddy" bit though. I've always considered that word in the "friends only" code. Anyway, I might send one more reply asking how she's been and if she replies to that ask her out for a drink or dinner or something.
Count Dookkake
Member
"Buddy" means exactly what you think it does.
Leave it alone.
Leave it alone.
Count Dookkake
Member
Nope.
If there is any chance for you to bang her, it will be increased by you letting it go for now.
If there is any chance for you to bang her, it will be increased by you letting it go for now.
Well that's a downer. How will it increase if I let it go though?
Mecha_Infantry
Banned
On a weird one now, but I've had this before, but it's always with american chicks over here
Anyway first date was cool on Sunday, didn't think too much of it. I thought it went well, she said it took ages for us to meet and it'll be a shame for it to take too long to meet again.
So I gave her a shout today (after forgetting to txt yesterday), just saying "will be cool to meet today (we agreed today/tomorrow) but if you can't, no worries"...got a reply simply saying "heya, sorry working today"
so I was a little like hmm, maybe I should rearrange for tomorrow, or something. But I txt back saying "no worries, I'll be in town for uni anyway
"...and blam that's all I heard from her today lol
It's obvious she isn't interested now- I think...but I'm just wondering why certain girls do it that way. Maybe I'm looking too much into it- just if the shoe was on the other foot I'd think I was being a little rude- even if we only met once!
Anyway, gotta go back to revising, won't hold my breath on this one.
Anyway first date was cool on Sunday, didn't think too much of it. I thought it went well, she said it took ages for us to meet and it'll be a shame for it to take too long to meet again.
So I gave her a shout today (after forgetting to txt yesterday), just saying "will be cool to meet today (we agreed today/tomorrow) but if you can't, no worries"...got a reply simply saying "heya, sorry working today"
so I was a little like hmm, maybe I should rearrange for tomorrow, or something. But I txt back saying "no worries, I'll be in town for uni anyway
"...and blam that's all I heard from her today lolIt's obvious she isn't interested now- I think...but I'm just wondering why certain girls do it that way. Maybe I'm looking too much into it- just if the shoe was on the other foot I'd think I was being a little rude- even if we only met once!
Anyway, gotta go back to revising, won't hold my breath on this one.
Count Dookkake
Member
Because you aren't being a whiny chump who ignores obvious clues like "buddy."
It's not an attractive look to pester someone who doesn't want that kind of attention from you. If you ignore her, she MIGHT think you have more going on and revise her opinion at some point. There is no guarantee that will happen, of course, but the chance of success is infinitely greater than pursuit.
I'm not gonna be pestering her or "I'd really like to go out with you, please!!" but seeing as I'm going to reply anyway seeing as she asked how I was going shouldn't I just at least drop a hint at hanging out sometime or throw it out there casually? I've heard women call guys buddy then sleep with the guy that same night. Though obviously that's not every case which is why I originally brought it up.
Count Dookkake
Member
Whatever you say, to her it will mean "I'd really like to go out with you, please."
If you are friends or acquaintances with her IRL, then use those channels of communication. I'm not saying to cut all ties or to be rude to her; just don't give any hint of romantic interest after getting buddied.
You will feel better about yourself in the long run.
If you are friends or acquaintances with her IRL, then use those channels of communication. I'm not saying to cut all ties or to be rude to her; just don't give any hint of romantic interest after getting buddied.
You will feel better about yourself in the long run.
I dunno what to do yet. On one hand I'd hate not even trying. But on the other I don't want to seem like a fuckin' "whiny chump". God, it's never simple. I hate online dating, so much more simple in real life. You go up, it either works or it doesn't, you get her number/hook-up or move on. The end.
...fuck it, I'll probably end up asking. I'd rather seem like a knob than never know.
Count Dookkake
Member
Do what you will, but please report back.
Don't touch her. Don't talk to her. Don't look at her.[/Andy]
I will. She actually asked if I had met anyone off the site. Should I try and sugar coat it a bit? Like "Yeah, they went really well when we met!" kind of thing to make meeting up seem a bit more interesting? Actually...they kinda did go well for a first meet but could that be an angle to go at?
HP_Wuvcraft
Banned
Alert a Swedish Techno Band?
I wouldn't do that. It would go one of two ways.
1. She'd say "good for you, they've been going well for me as well" and then the conversation would end or
2. She'd ask about details and you'd end up sitting there telling her about the dates you've been on which isn't ideal.
I don't know... if you're going to do this you may as well use this an opportunity to just be bold and ask her if she's offering to take you out and tell her what you like to do. It'll clearly be a joke but it'll get the ball rolling. It's either pass or fail at that point. I see this becoming friendly banter otherwise.
I'm also eager to see where this goes
Good points. I think I know where it's going to go though. But you know what? Fuck it. I never had the guts to ask her out when I used to know her. If I do and she says no, I'm at least one step further than I was last time and that chapter will have reached it's anti-climactic end, forever.
Perspicacity
Banned
Five star update.
Just try not to end up in a bathtub full of ice missing a kidney and you'll be fine.
Sounds like a great date to me.
lol damn. Don't pass out, man. Who knows where/if you'll wake up.
Zomba13
Member
Keep it together. Try not to be a dick to her/other people by accident.
Haha, oh god. How much did you drink?! Screw the toilet, talk to her.
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