• Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.

Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!

Status
Not open for further replies.

wenis

Registered for GAF on September 11, 2001.
Exactly what I'm thinking and were thinking. Im gonna reject next time. She didn't tell me I had to pick up her friends so I were pretty frustrated.

at least you got your head one straight then. unless she actually invites you to come out and party (which means you both showing up in the same-ish time frame) don't bother being her ride home. She's a big girl, she can take care of herself.
 

Pachimari

Member
So did you just drive them around and then just drop them off, or did you do anything else with her?
That it turned out to be far away I decided to stay there and they really wanted me to stay. So I got to know her friends better and she just thanked me for spending time with her and her friends.

at least you got your head one straight then. unless she actually invites you to come out and party (which means you both showing up in the same-ish time frame) don't bother being her ride home. She's a big girl, she can take care of herself.
Yea, I totally get you. I won't do it again, I don't want to. And I thought it would be rude of me to ask them to leave my car when they told me we were going that far, "my" girl told me she didn't know and she tried telling her drunk friends to help me out.
 

nbraun80

Member
That it turned out to be far away I decided to stay there and they really wanted me to stay. So I got to know her friends better and she just thanked me for spending time with her and her friends.
I guess it's not such a bad thing that she wants to show you off to her friends, but like wenis said i wouldn't get roped into that situation every time.
 

Pachimari

Member
I guess it's not such a bad thing that she wants to show you off to her friends, but like wenis said i wouldn't get roped into that situation every time.
I won't do it next time and I don't think she will ask another time. I offered to pick her up and drop her off at her or my place but she don't want me to be her driver she said. But I'm learning from all this at least, I'm really practicing not being TOO nice, it can come off as desperate.

I'm happy you guys are guiding, I need it these days.
 
what the site believes to be your top 3 best matches at the moment. answer more questions for a better match! (which is somewhere around a thousand questions answered).

Cupid in mythology has a bow and arrow. It draws arrows ( potential mates e.g. women/men) from its quiver and fires them at you.

Do these three girls get my profile in their 'Quiver'? Cause they'll look at it and deride me as a nutcase.

I wrote it as a nutcase, so there's that.
 

nbraun80

Member
I won't do it next time and I don't think she will ask another time. I offered to pick her up and drop her off at her or my place but she don't want me to be her driver she said. But I'm learning from all this at least, I'm really practicing not being TOO nice, it can come off as desperate.
Ok, well it sounds like she isn't just trying to use you as a driver, and good call on not being too nice. keep up the good work, sir.

Also sorry on the Real loss. :(
 

Zerokku

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
Talking with some friends and realizing I needed to get back into the dating scene, so I made one of these for shits and giggles.

Any thoughts on my profile?

Only had it for a couple days now, but it doesn't seem too bad. Have had some really basic back and forth with two girls I've messaged, and I've been getting a decent number of girls looking at my profile, including one that seems to be looking at it several times. I'd message her, except that her "message me" think says shes only interested in dating jewish guys. (Which you can tell I'm not from my profile so I dunno...)

...And I just got an email that seems to be the "great personality" version of that whole "you're hot!" okcupid email. I'll take what I can get haha.
 

Pachimari

Member
Ok, well it sounds like she isn't just trying to use you as a driver, and good call on not being too nice. keep up the good work, sir.

Also sorry on the Real loss. :(
What frustrates me is, that I actually went out of my bed to pick her up at 2 at night but I guess I did it so that we could have some time together. But after the frustration of her friends I actually really like them. They're funny. I like that "my" girl put a duvet on me so I wouldn't freeze and kissed my hand and such. It have to mean, there's at least interest..

Anyway, next up they want us to go to disco. And I have never been at disco due to my past phobia, and I think I have already challenged myself insanely much this week by going to the bar and also spending time with her friends. But it can also be of practice to me.

But looking back. We really do seem to be different. She's clearly the city type who likes going out to party and all that is new to me, but that can be good as well, right?

I must say I have said some weird things as well but I have not been able to sleep for 2 nights now. I'm really tired.
 

wenis

Registered for GAF on September 11, 2001.
Do these three girls get my profile in their 'Quiver'? Cause they'll look at it and deride me as a nutcase.

I wrote it as a nutcase, so there's that.

No, they have no idea they are in your quiver (but im sure at some random point in time there was a crossover of quivers at the same time, but the pool in each area may be large enough that it just doesn't happen that often), that's why you're able to dismiss them from your quiver or PM them.


What frustrates me is, that I actually went out of my bed to pick her up at 2 at night but I guess I did it so that we could have some time together. But after the frustration of her friends I actually really like them. They're funny. I like that "my" girl put a duvet on me so I wouldn't freeze and kissed my hand and such. It have to mean, there's at least interest..

Anyway, next up they want us to go to disco. And I have never been at disco due to my past phobia, and I think I have already challenged myself insanely much this week by going to the bar and also spending time with her friends. But it can also be of practice to me.

But looking back. We really do seem to be different. She's clearly the city type who likes going out to party and all that is new to me, but that can be good as well, right?

I must say I have said some weird things as well but I have not been able to sleep for 2 nights now. I'm really tired.

Go to the disco and try to have fun. 3 drinks maximum (if you start with beer, end with beer... one liquor drink limit, no repeats of last time).

and remember, no one really gives a shit what you look like on the dance floor unless you're bumpin into people or being a nuisance. have fun and just kinda go with the music, if she's intuitive enough or interested in you, she'll want to drag you out there and
she'll guide you for a bit. If not have fun with it and don't drink too much...very important.


Talking with some friends and realizing I needed to get back into the dating scene, so I made one of these for shits and giggles.

Any thoughts on my profile?

Only had it for a couple days now, but it doesn't seem too bad. Have had some really basic back and forth with two girls I've messaged, and I've been getting a decent number of girls looking at my profile, including one that seems to be looking at it several times. I'd message her, except that her "message me" think says shes only interested in dating jewish guys. (Which you can tell I'm not from my profile so I dunno...)

...And I just got an email that seems to be the "great personality" version of that whole "you're hot!" okcupid email. I'll take what I can get haha.

you should message that chick anyways. something along the lines of "i noticed you kept checking out my profile. I know I'm not jewish... like at all, but checking out your profile you seem pretty cool and interesting. I think that's a pretty good starting point if you think the same (or else why would you be checking my profile out so often :p hah) of me we should hang out sometime soon. coffee or a meal somewhere."

obviously not word for word of what I said. Put your own voice to it.
 

nbraun80

Member
What frustrates me is, that I actually went out of my bed to pick her up at 2 at night but I guess I did it so that we could have some time together. But after the frustration of her friends I actually really like them. They're funny. I like that "my" girl put a duvet on me so I wouldn't freeze and kissed my hand and such. It have to mean, there's at least interest..

Anyway, next up they want us to go to disco. And I have never been at disco due to my past phobia, and I think I have already challenged myself insanely much this week by going to the bar and also spending time with her friends. But it can also be of practice to me.

But looking back. We really do seem to be different. She's clearly the city type who likes going out to party and all that is new to me, but that can be good as well, right?

I must say I have said some weird things as well but I have not been able to sleep for 2 nights now. I'm really tired.
Yeah, she definitely seems to like you, i mean she soberly slept with your drunk ass. ha Being different can definitely be a good thing, sometimes it's good to have people who force you out of your comfort zone and open you up.
 

Pachimari

Member
Yea. I were surprised that I were singing AND dancing in front of everyone at the bar. And at disco there's even less attention at you I imagine. But I'm not sure I actually enjoy the dancing and I'm not sure how I'll react if I see her dance with other guys. In the past I have had serious jealousy issues but last night I wasn't even bothered that she had been out dancing with others. I kind of want to see us as friends enjoying dancing with all people when we go to disco. I think I can handle it.

Another question is if I can handle the drinking part. When I get drunk I can do whatever I want but maybe I forget to behave sometimes. But if Im not drunk then the anxiety rises inside of me and then I just sit in a corner. It's starting to feel like some form of medicine.

She told me today that when I were drunk I locked her friend on her neck and I said I wanted to sleep at the train station. She laughed at it, but I know I absolutely need to behave.

Its just hard to say stop. 4 years ago I were going to pick up my gf but I ended up drunk and jumping into her class room while they had a session, she got pissed. It have been bad but I'm getting a lot better on this front.

Yeah, she definitely seems to like you, i mean she soberly slept with your drunk ass. ha Being different can definitely be a good thing, sometimes it's good to have people who force you out of your comfort zone and open you up.
I'm thinking that if we don't end up together then at least I have tried these things outside my comfort zone and maybe gotten some friends along the way.

By the way, I'm starting to wonder why she hugs me instead of kissing me when I drop her off. Maybe it's nothing to think about.
 

Riggs

Banned
thanks, that'll get me through the rest of this essay.

The six things I could never do without
My friends, video games, internet (especially NeoGAF <3), family, food, and water.

Haha nice dude. I have no idea why I am reading your OKC profile that is really creepy. Think I'll go back to AC:R now lol.
 

wenis

Registered for GAF on September 11, 2001.
Updated mine a bit. Maybe too little info. Dug up another picture buried deep in my phone. Had a couple I didn't know about. Tough to find one where my eyes aren't darker than what I already have up : (

Still giving 5 stars to all visitors.

dude, cut out the stuff about GAF, not having a girlfriend before and some of the school stuff. Yes, it's great that you're focused on school, but there needs to be a bit more, even just about what you hope to accomplish in the future. Women like seeing some ambition to a potential partner. Show them that you have drive to achieve those goals, whatever they may be.

in your "message me if" spot, make that second comment more tongue in cheek (since you've already stated that you're a sober individual). something like "You need a reliable designated driver. I charge by the hour or you're buying grub on the way back to your destination" have fun with this profile. the more fun or exciting you come off in writing the better chances you'll have with people coming to your profile to look and message.

you don't just think about your hobbies. a bit more info there, flesh it out a bit. don't be afraid to be a bit silly or at least play into your natural personality.

While it is nice to say you don't drink and do drugs (which is completely admirable and a brave choice to make at your age), you don't need to constantly touch on it. A sentence just saying "I choose to remain sober, but I still love having a good time with new and old friends" lets viewers of your profile know that you can still have fun and that you're fun to be around. You're gunna need to bring out some of that natural charisma a bit and challenge yourself to try something new every now and again. Obviously this doesn't mean you need to break your sobriety, but it doesn't hurt to get out there a bit. Life is still fun.

Yea. I were surprised that I were singing AND dancing in front of everyone at the bar. And at disco there's even less attention at you I imagine. But I'm not sure I actually enjoy the dancing and I'm not sure how I'll react if I see her dance with other guys. In the past I have had serious jealousy issues but last night I wasn't even bothered that she had been out dancing with others. I kind of want to see us as friends enjoying dancing with all people when we go to disco. I think I can handle it.

Another question is if I can handle the drinking part. When I get drunk I can do whatever I want but maybe I forget to behave sometimes. But if Im not drunk then the anxiety rises inside of me and then I just sit in a corner.

Her dancing with other guys is a non-issue. She's slept with you and introduced you to her friends. So you've already got a bit of a solid foundation to build from. In fact, I think that you should be trying to win her friends over right now. Show her that you're comfortable in your skin and that while you are hanging out with her and came out to see her, that it isn't all about her. You can still have fun and create friendships with her friends. Doing that you're just sewing yourself into the fold.

Have fun with it. Don't run off to the bathroom when you're nervous and don't worry so much about the scene. Chicks are pick up on this kind of thing. So when they see that you're just having a good time, they'll be assured that this isn't going to be a lopsided relationship.
 

Zerokku

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
Updated mine a bit. Maybe too little info. Dug up another picture buried deep in my phone. Had a couple I didn't know about. Tough to find one where my eyes aren't darker than what I already have up : (

Still giving 5 stars to all visitors.

I'm new to this site so I may not know what I'm talking about, but try to add some "meat" to your profile. It shouldn't be overly verbose, but you need to give people something to go on. You're trying to sell yourself in essence.

Look at people you match well with, see how they have their profiles written. Try and do similarly. And not in a "This girl is cute I'm going to be a creeper and make myself come off as her perfect guy", but more in a okay, the people I'm matching with are expanding on themselves in such and such way, I should probably do similarly.

And like wenis said, don't do stuff like mention GAF.
 

Riggs

Banned
Here is mine, first time ever posting a pic of myself on GAF. I don't like to because I am fat face.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Dan27TA

I just read through my profile since I set this up a while ago, holy shit I am a troll. Can't believe I slept with 2 girls off this site with a shitty profile like that haha. (sad stealth brag, but hey it happened!)
 

Pachimari

Member
Yea. By the way, when I were driving home from her friend's place she actually came with me so I didn't have to be alone on my way home. That's nice of her but now she is just doing nothing at home, while she could have stayed at her friends place. But I really can't go out with her now, I haven't slept for 2 days and she think I need sleep.
 
It's better to show rather than tell on these things. Instead of saying you're good at making people laugh, actually do it. Get some jokes up in that bitch. And as Devo said, no negatives, no matter how true.
 
Weirdly, when i spend time reading someone's profile and personalize my message i get no play. Just now i went with "Hey what's up. Cute pics :)" and i'm having a conversation with someone.
 

RedAssedApe

Banned
Are you sabotaging yourself if you put video games down as a hobby? I recall encountering at least a few profiles that stated that you should not contact them if you are a grown man who still plays video games. lol
 

Slavik81

Member
Are you sabotaging yourself if you put video games down as a hobby? I recall encountering at least a few profiles that stated that you should not contact them if you are a grown man who still plays video games. lol

On OKC, I met a girl who was a hardcore D&D player, the captain of the university StarCraft team, and am now dating a girl who watched through the Nintendo E3 press conference (she's apparently some GAFer's sister).

I couldn't tell you how well I'd have done if I'd avoided listing favourite/current video game interests on my profile, but I'd probably never want to be with someone who hated games anyways. Quite frankly, I'd feel better weeding those people out right off the bat.
 
I've been getting a lot more messages than I expected but is like they didn't read my profile because when I read theirs we are almost polar opposites. Joining has certainly been interesting.
 

noah111

Still Alive
I'm probably never going to use this since i'm not finding anyone really in my immediate area, but I decided to fill out some of the profile fields anyway so it wouldn't be so bare to viewers. Nothing really in-depth though.
 

Zomba13

Member
:) asked the girl I've been chatting to out and she said yes. We're gonna do something next week because she's busy tomorrow and I'm busy Saturday.
Yay for OKC and this thread for reminding me of my account I had there.
 

nbraun80

Member
:) asked the girl I've been chatting to out and she said yes. We're gonna do something next week because she's busy tomorrow and I'm busy Saturday.
Yay for OKC and this thread for reminding me of my account I had there.
Yeah i kinda rebooted mine too after hanging around in this thread. Congrats man, live updates like anastacio? haha :)
 
i wonder why some people keep creating fake profiles .... using some of the same pictures while changing usernames

ive been chatting with a chick who does fashion design...we dont send each other messages everyday but when we do they are long as hell. she seems pretty interesting and is very thoughtful. i think i would actually be comfortable seeing her in person without fearing awkwardness on the first date

we shall see
 
ive been chatting with a chick who does fashion design...we dont send each other messages everyday but when we do they are long as hell. she seems pretty interesting and is very thoughtful. i think i would actually be comfortable seeing her in person without fearing awkwardness on the first date

we shall see
I have a few of those too, but mine feel like they're going nowhere.

I used the IM feature last night (which is awful, btw) and got a girl's attention that we ended up chatting really late. I think I may use IM more if they have it activated-- maybe they'll feel more obligated to reply and it's easier to know if they're not interested.
 

Ferrio

Banned
I have a few of those too, but mine feel like they're going nowhere.

I used the IM feature last night (which is awful, btw) and got a girl's attention that we ended up chatting really late. I think I may use IM more if they have it activated-- maybe they'll feel more obligated to reply and it's easier to know if they're not interested.

General rule of thumb I used was that you should ask for a date by the 3rd exchange. Going beyond that you're just beating around the bush, and either they'll get bored cause you're not manning up or you're wasting your time cause they're not interested but being polite.
 
Yeah I'm probably gonna ask to see her soon. i'll wait for her next reply to gauge

i havent been too aggressive because she messaged me first with the whole "this is embarrassing and i dont have a pic so i can remain anonymous" so i have been feeling out her comfort level

i can tell we both take our times to write good replies cause both of us will usually go at least two days before replying even if we both have logged on (the fact that you can know that is creepy and i dont like it)

i am in dallas and she said she has been getting into baseball lately and asked if im into sports. i said yes and that i am a heat/marlins/dolphins fan....saying "the heat" may have killed anything i got going in this city lol
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top Bottom