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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!

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H

HP_Wuvcraft

Banned
Attackthebase said:
I was at Starbucks today, killing some time before seeing Prometheus, when a girl came over and talked to me. She was from Okcupid, and she recognized me from the site. It seemed she messaged me twice beforehand, and I didn't message her back either time. She's a decent-looking girl, but our match rating was 10% and enemy 50%.

When she was flirting with me, I rejected her, and continued back to something more interesting, my reread of Game of Thrones. Being back home, and not socializing as much during the summer, I slightly forgot the feeling of rejecting a woman. It felt good.
Click to expand...

Are you a sociopath?
 
L

low-G

Member
Grimm Fandango said:
When would you guys say to make a date if the girl contacts you first? 3rd email?
Click to expand...

email? You mean message? I always go a lot more than 3 messages as does anyone I know that meets via OKCupid, and that goes for relationship types and sex-types.

Maybe I'm off base but that seems really quick and a bit desperate.

henhowc said:
That's pretty much all of them. Especially the short asian girls. Apparently they want their kids to be taller and not have to suffer the same fate. ;)
Click to expand...

Yeah, I'll take care of that for ya baby. (speaking to short Asian girl)


P.S. height comes up way more on NeoGAF than anywhere else in the known universe, but it feels pretty good man.
 
G

Grimm Fandango

Member
low-G said:
email? You mean message? I always go a lot more than 3 messages as does anyone I know that meets via OKCupid, and that goes for relationship types and sex-types.

Maybe I'm off base but that seems really quick and a bit desperate.
Click to expand...

It's actually Match which (to me) people expect "better" relationships or at least more than OkCupid. But yeah, 3 does sound bad when I think about it; thanks.
 
S

starchild excalibur

Member
So, this has been an interesting week. A girl messages me out of the blue several days back making chit chat. I look at her profile, she seems nice although not someone I'm really sure I want to pursue, so I message her back being friendly (although never saying anything flirty or suggestive). She responds back super quickly every time and eventually gives me her number saying it'd be faster to text than message on OKC.

At this point I feel it's necessary to tell her that while I think she's nice, I'm actually pursuing someone else on OKC (which is true) and that I understand if she doesn't want to continue our dialogue any further since it'd basically be platonic.

Now, this is the strange part. There's something about her that's made me think for the past couple of days that it'd be strange if - once I eventually told her I was already interested in someone else - I got hit on out of the blue by some other random girl almost as a test to see whether this was true, or whether I just didn't want to pursue her. I figured it wouldn't happen - I'm not attractive or interesting enough that this girl should say anything but "Yeah, I'm only looking to date. It was nice talking to you, but see ya."

But I kid you not, I told her last night that I was already pursuing another OKC member and just woke up to a message from a new girl with a flirtatious message - one that, as a shmucky-looking guy I've never ever gotten before. And I do a search on her name and there's nothing - no history of her account, which makes me think it's new. The new girl only has one photo, no stats, no match percentage with me, no bio. I'm flabbergasted.
 
S

Scrow

Still Tagged Accordingly
Grimm Fandango said:
When would you guys say to make a date if the girl contacts you first? 3rd email?
Click to expand...

there's no answer for this.

i know people want "rules" and "guidelines" for this kind of thing, but there truly aren't any.

cliches are around for a reason. be yourself and let things happen naturally. make a date when you want. if she says "yes", great! if she says "no", no big deal. don't take it personally, she just isn't ready. keep talking until she's ready for a date. otherwise, move on.

as simple as that is, took me a while to figure it out.
 
E

ElectricThunder

Member
I favor moving quickly'ish to a first date if there are no extenuating circumstances(weird schedules, distances, etc) at play---only takes a time or so on the other end when somebody on there pulls the String Along Game where weeks "slip" into months before they flake off or some such in grand fashion and leave you to stew about just how much time you spent on a dead end, likely with nothing to show for it even if chatting up others at the same time.

My latest discovering being that when a "Yes" later becomes a "Maybe", it does not bode well at all and should be called out on the spot.
 
D

Darklord

Banned
Just came across probably the hottest girl I've seen on OKC. Odd profile though. It seems all perfectly fine then at the end she says she's a stripper until she finishes her studying but no one can ask anything about her job or related to stripping. Why say that and then say don't mention it? You know like 90% of the guys will bring it up. Ah well, if she's even real she's probably crazy but might as well give it a shot anyway.
 
M

Movement

Member
starchild excalibur said:
So, this has been an interesting week. A girl messages me out of the blue several days back making chit chat. I look at her profile, she seems nice although not someone I'm really sure I want to pursue, so I message her back being friendly (although never saying anything flirty or suggestive). She responds back super quickly every time and eventually gives me her number saying it'd be faster to text than message on OKC.

At this point I feel it's necessary to tell her that while I think she's nice, I'm actually pursuing someone else on OKC (which is true) and that I understand if she doesn't want to continue our dialogue any further since it'd basically be platonic.

Now, this is the strange part. There's something about her that's made me think for the past couple of days that it'd be strange if - once I eventually told her I was already interested in someone else - I got hit on out of the blue by some other random girl almost as a test to see whether this was true, or whether I just didn't want to pursue her. I figured it wouldn't happen - I'm not attractive or interesting enough that this girl should say anything but "Yeah, I'm only looking to date. It was nice talking to you, but see ya."

But I kid you not, I told her last night that I was already pursuing another OKC member and just woke up to a message from a new girl with a flirtatious message - one that, as a shmucky-looking guy I've never ever gotten before. And I do a search on her name and there's nothing - no history of her account, which makes me think it's new. The new girl only has one photo, no stats, no match percentage with me, no bio. I'm flabbergasted.
Click to expand...

Be careful man, she may be crazy.
 
Z

Zekes!

Member
totally just got a message from some dude asking me if I wanted to give and receive a blow job

I have to admit this was better than the last couple girls who've messaged me
 
Z

ZombieFred

Unconfirmed Member
Ok I've signed onto this site for a week and now things are getting interesting. An older women in her 40s (I am 22) wants to have a nice night with her for wine and dine and plus going into her bed with her. She's very attractive mind you but I don't think cougers are my thing haha.
 
S

sphinx

the piano man
One thing I am noticing is that people are VERY arrogant and have no etiquette or manners in Okcupid.

I have been using a dating site in Europe for years and the manners here is that you either say "thanks" in a small message or send a small icon stating that you are "flattered but sadly not interested"

in Okcupid people won't give a fuck and that's very rude.
 
T

The Anti-Monitor

Banned
sphinx said:
One thing I am noticing is that people are VERY arrogant and have no etiquette or manners in Okcupid.

I have been using a dating site in Europe for years and the manners here is that you either say "thanks" in a small message or send a small icon stating that you are "flattered but sadly not interested"

in Okcupid people won't give a fuck and that's very rude.
Click to expand...

A lot of women get a lot of messages, way more than waht you can manage using the site every now and then, so they really can't reply them all.

Have in mind, before she's read yours, she's probably read 5-10 of extremely annoying people. There's a point where replying messages becomes a chore and nobody is on a dating site for that.
 
E

electricshake

Member
sphinx said:
One thing I am noticing is that people are VERY arrogant and have no etiquette or manners in Okcupid.

I have been using a dating site in Europe for years and the manners here is that you either say "thanks" in a small message or send a small icon stating that you are "flattered but sadly not interested"

in Okcupid people won't give a fuck and that's very rude.
Click to expand...

I was told specifically by gaffers not to reply if I wasn't interested.
 
L

LProtag

Member
I've gotten some replies but conversations have just stopped, which kinda sucks.

Granted, I did that once with a girl who sent me her number after I didn't reply for half a day.
 
S

sphinx

the piano man
The Anti-Monitor said:
A lot of women get a lot of messages, way more than waht you can manage using the site every now and then, so they really can't reply them all.

Have in mind, before she's read yours, she's probably read 5-10 of extremely annoying people. There's a point where replying messages becomes a chore and nobody is on a dating site for that.
Click to expand...

A message from a guy that dedicated you a song on the piano and told you your eyes are like the brightest stars in a starry night (cheesy as fuck but whatever) does deserve a thank you, even if she just read 10 messages from annoying people.

that or said girl really didn't deserve it
(which is what happened in my case, truth be told)
 
O

OriginofHysteria

Banned
Just wondering, is being blunt and straight forward in your profile come off as being an ass? For example, I said that I hate incompetence in people and that if someone acts like an idiot, I will most likely call them one.
 
D

Devolution

Member
sphinx said:
A message from a guy that dedicated you a song on the piano and told you your eyes are like the brightest stars in a starry night (cheesy as fuck but whatever) does deserve a thank you, even if she just read 10 messages from annoying people.

that or said girl really didn't deserve it
(which is what happened in my case, truth be told)
Click to expand...

Why would you want an ungrateful forced thank you that wastes your time and gets your hopes up? Be thankful when someone doesn't lead you on.
 
L

Liu Kang Baking A Pie

Member
OriginofHysteria said:
Just wondering, is being blunt and straight forward in your profile come off as being an ass? For example, I said that I hate incompetence in people and that if someone acts like an idiot, I will most likely call them one.
Click to expand...
Negativity is the dealbreaker there. Just post about what makes you happy and come off as a generally cool person rather than someone focusing on negatives.


sphinx said:
A message from a guy that dedicated you a song on the piano and told you your eyes are like the brightest stars in a starry night (cheesy as fuck but whatever) does deserve a thank you, even if she just read 10 messages from annoying people.

that or said girl really didn't deserve it
(which is what happened in my case, truth be told)
Click to expand...
Men don't have emotional outlets like women. I've seen it happen where women will respond with a "no thanks" type of message, and no matter how nice they were, the men don't know how to handle their emotions other than just returning rage and hate for the rejection. It's better to just not contact them at all.
 
D

Devolution

Member
Liu Kang Baking A Pie said:
Negativity is the dealbreaker there. Just post about what makes you happy and come off as a generally cool person rather than someone focusing on negatives.


Men don't have emotional outlets like women. I've seen it happen where women will respond with a "no thanks" type of message, and no matter how nice they were, the men don't know how to handle their emotions other than just returning rage and hate for the rejection. It's better to just not contact them at all.
Click to expand...

When I was a mod I saw a bunch of those.

"Hi what's up <compliment> then <asks for info>"
"Oh that's nice, thank you but I'm not interested."
"Whatever you fucking bitch."
 
L

Lone_Prodigy

Member
sphinx said:
A message from a guy that dedicated you a song on the piano and told you your eyes are like the brightest stars in a starry night (cheesy as fuck but whatever) does deserve a thank you, even if she just read 10 messages from annoying people.

that or said girl really didn't deserve it
(which is what happened in my case, truth be told)
Click to expand...

That message is superficial (complimenting her on her looks means you didn't read her profile) and screams "form letter". She didn't need to reply.
 
S

sphinx

the piano man
Lone_Prodigy said:
That message is superficial (complimenting her on her looks means you didn't read her profile) and screams "form letter". She didn't need to reply.
Click to expand...

lol, I can't believe this. " screams form letter, I'd dismiss right away" ..

a guy playing a piano piece FOR YOU is superficial and deserves no answer? this is pretty fucked up.

if so, then she is REALLY full of herself, it means she takes compliments for granted, which is the worst attribute she could ever have.
 
D

Devolution

Member
sphinx said:
lol, I can't believe this. " screams form letter, I'd dismiss right away" ..

a guy playing a piano piece FOR YOU is superficial and deserves no answer? this is pretty fucked up.

if so, then she is REALLY full of herself, it means she takes compliments for granted, which is the worst attribute she could ever have.
Click to expand...

Why are you taking it so personally? Why did you go to that much trouble? Sonnet stuff/writing songs right off the bat is creepy, I'm telling you that right now for your own good.
 
N

Nemo

Will Eat Your Children
I've used Skout a while ago, did manage to get five dates out of it. Funny enough out of those two of them made it expressively known they just wanted friends/someone to chat with beforehand

But from my experience with these things, people are always more genuine, which is nice because if you meet people in RL they often seem more superfluous or something in the first stage
 
X

X-Frame

Member
I heard in the UK there is a site called MySingleFriend or something in which a friend actually writes your profile, not you.

I think that's a great idea -- especially if you can get a female friend to write your profile. On the flip side -- guys writing a girls profile would be hilarious.

Too bad the site isn't available in the US.
 
O

OriginofHysteria

Banned
Here is my pro, re-done and everything. Anything I can do to make it better?

My self-summary
What to say...

Well I like to think of myself as a well rounded individual. I do have a lot of hobbies and I like a lot of things that for some reason may seem conflicting. I love having conversations about anything and everything. Whether it be about the weather to sports banter or even current events, I always have an opinion on something.

I like to keep myself fairly active too. I'm an avid ice hockey player and I've been playing for a long time (since I was about 4-ish). If I'm not playing hockey then I'm most likely playing football (soccer), going for a run, playing golf or playing baseball. But don't get me wrong, I do enjoy staying home and playing video games and watching TV too.

I am also a big sports fan, hockey being my obvious number one. I'm a big Toronto Maple Leafs fan and it pains me to say that they are awful. Seven years and no playoffs :(. On top of that I am also a big football (soccer) fan, love following Arsenal overseas and the New York Red Bulls here. I do like the other football as well as I am a Jets fan (its tough) and also a Yankees fan for baseball.

I would say that I'm basically looking for someone who can let themselves go and be non-caring and fun but at the same time realize that line where you do need to be serious. It is imperative that you can be someone I can have fun with.

What I’m doing with my life
Currently in the legal field and it is actually my aspiration to become a Supreme Court Justice one day

I’m really good at
Being myself. I also think I'm good at making food just because I love food. I can make mean pancakes, pasta, steak and I can even make the best peanut butter and jelly sandwich you will ever eat.

I am also a champion at making popcorn versus the microwave. I am undefeated when it comes to not making the microwave burn my popcorn. Suck it microwave.

I also think that I'm good at conversations. I'm pretty much upbeat about whatever and I think it shows when I talk.

The first things people usually notice about me
Probably how random I am.

Also, contrary to my photos, I do not regularly go out dressed as Gumby.

The six things I could never do without
Hm probably:
-Dessert items
-Phone
-my hockey gear
-music
-the ability to be lazy
-the people I'm close to.

I spend a lot of time thinking about

A lot of things really. There isn't a time when I'm just thinking about one thing. But I do think about constantly how I can make myself better at anything I do.

I also observe the things around me and what people do etc, and just think to myself, "there should be a law...". I have a ton of these.

On a typical Friday night I am

Chances are you'll catch me playing hockey, staying in or out with my friends. Typical Friday night stuff.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I ate an entire pie of Dominos pizza in one sitting...then proceeded to eat ice cream cake. It was the best day of my life.

I’m looking for

Girls who like guys
Ages 19–28
Near me
For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating


You should message me if
You don't sniff bath salts.
 
B

bjb

Banned
sphinx said:
fine, fine.

I am new to the site and to all of this but I'll learn. No more piano playing in the future.
Click to expand...

If I were a girl and didn't know you, but you wrote me a song and played it on the piano showing it to me - I would think you're a fucking CREEP. No questions asked.
 
Amory

Amory

Member
Guys I think I'm in love after 2 dates...she went to Williams College (look it up, I had to) and just found out yesterday that she'd scored in the 99th percentile on the MCATs. She's beautiful and we spent the whole night drinking exotic beers and making out.

Yep I'm in love.
 
S

Sajjaja

Member
Amory said:
Guys I think I'm in love after 2 dates...she went to Williams College (look it up, I had to) and just found out yesterday that she'd scored in the 99th percentile on the MCATs. She's beautiful and we spent the whole night drinking exotic beers and making out.

Yep I'm in love.
Click to expand...

Sounds like an infatuation if I've ever read it.
 
D

Devolution

Member
Amory said:
Guys I think I'm in love after 2 dates...she went to Williams College (look it up, I had to) and just found out yesterday that she'd scored in the 99th percentile on the MCATs. She's beautiful and we spent the whole night drinking exotic beers and making out.

Yep I'm in love.
Click to expand...

2 dates? =/. Come on man. How well do you think you even know her.
 
G

GG-Duo

Member
Oh, oops. But yeah, those towels and products are kinda disgusting. I know that's what real people are like but yeesh, edit.

Also, am I the only one that goes straight to the photos first and then read the profile later?
 
J

jaxword

Member
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I sent her a message asking if she's a goddess of fire and harvests and shit.
Click to expand...

qgDG6.jpg
 
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