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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!
- Thread starter AlimNassor
- Start date
- Status
bummer...for me
After my date yesterday, and getting to know the girl way better, and past relationships, I've decided to disable the account on OKC for now to let this play out with her. I'm definitely into her, and don't see the point at the moment to be fishing for other dates. She also mentioned cheating is a no fly zone for her, and it is for me, and while talking to other girls is not cheating, the point of the site is to go past just messages to meet ups, etc. At some point a girl I'd be messaging would want to meet up with me since I can't help but be a great flirt. Trying to prevent any forest fires.
feelsgoodman
feelsgoodman
congrats, best of luck to you both
you mean reading this thread right now, this very moment?
what if they did?congrats, best of luck to you both
you mean reading this thread right now, this very moment?
I wanted to ask them what is wrong with my profile since I get no action. Douchy move but
I'm getting my masters and teaching certification here during the next year. After that, with CT certification I'll be able to be certified in any state because of the high standards here, so I could. CT has really good pay for teachers though compared to most of the rest of the country.
I've always thought about moving to NYC, Boston or the other side of the country like Portland or Seattle.
There's attractive girls around here it just seems like they're just not all on OKC I guess, which makes sense. I don't think a CT GAF meetup would be great, haha.
Beware the "bisexual"
I met this girl, we went out had a fantastic time, took her out again on the 4th we made out drank wine watched fireworks and all was well...but despite the fact that she thinks I am awesome and all that, she wants nothing to do with the cock, and is hung up on her ex GF.
Just words of warning...
I met this girl, we went out had a fantastic time, took her out again on the 4th we made out drank wine watched fireworks and all was well...but despite the fact that she thinks I am awesome and all that, she wants nothing to do with the cock, and is hung up on her ex GF.
Just words of warning...
situation i'm in now.
I imagine a lot of girls use it as an easy out... but this girl does modeling and stuff, and showed me pics and whatnot with girls she was involved with so I know she's not just blowin smoke up my ass (What I wouldn't give for that, lol) but it is a frustrating situation.
Guess it's best to just move onto the next...oh and a side note about POF it's like the back alley abortion clinic of dating, I do not recommend.
Honestly if I was you...if she is not into cock I would offer her oral sex, if she says no. BYE. Move to the next one.
Awesome man. Girl #3 I'm still talking to and we WERE set up for stuff today, but she had to bow out because she's really picky about things not being clean, and has been looking over her parents' place for the week of her vacation. So she's gotta clean their place today before they come back, and HER place before I can come over.
feelsbadman
I offered her that I could come clean with her if she liked (myself loving cleaning) and she shot me down, saying she's really picky about that stuff. I still am giving her space though, and I really think she's the one, I just need to see her dammit! I've been trying to see her since last Wednesday. Wednesday, she couldn't. Thursday, a migraine. Friday, sick. Saturday, Cleaning Time. So we set it for Sunday. After I get off work at 4 pm, I'm over there until like midnight.
I. Just. Need. To. See. Her. Seriously, this shit is gonna click like fucking gears if she ever frees herself up. I keep telling myself that she's worth the wait, honestly. I've had like five other girls try to talk to me while I keep pursuing her, but I shrug them bitches off. This girl is so much a match (up to 99% on okcupid now), I'm really dying to see how well sparks will fly.
electricshake
Member
PM me if it you want
Bay Maximus
Banned
Sounds like you need to invite the ex-GF over and work it all out.
I hope she isn't flaking you. First a headache, now she has to clean her room? Sounds almost like generic excuses.
scotcheggz
Member
I dunno man, I've met quite a few women (a few men too) that have to have everything sparkling clean before they invite men over, cleaning with them is never going to happen since that would suggest you'd see it in the "unclean" state. Actually thinking about it I've met some seriously anal people over the years. I had a gf once who only ever let me stay over at her flat once the whole time we were together becuase she was so worried I'd think it was some kind of hovel, it was always at my place. I think the once was probably only becuase she thought she might have been coming across as shady.
I dunno, fingers crossed. If she flakes tomorrow though I'd probably drop it maxrpg and let her come to you or fuck it off.
I dunno, fingers crossed. If she flakes tomorrow though I'd probably drop it maxrpg and let her come to you or fuck it off.
that's very unfair and assholish from them.
unless they are truly Bi and are using that as excuse to get rid of you guys, but if that's the case, what a moronic way to deal with the situation.
wrong on several levels.
I think you need to calm down about this. You've gotten your hopes WAY too high.
Hmm, interesting, I'm from the Boston area and I just disabled mine because it was hard to find cute girls in my age group
that would talk to me. Also I'm poor
I guess this stuff does depend on matches though
edit: yeah max, chill with that
Barack Lesnar
Banned
This post is coming off creepy and needy and as someone who is too quickly attached. I would tread carefully from here on out with her, make sure you don't come off like that in the communication.
You guys are silly. I just really enjoyed talking with her, that's all.
She just messaged me today and she said she could hang out! SCORE! Her parents won't be back until later, WAY LATER that evening.
To the guys above me: what you see is I wrote down my pure unadulterated thoughts which are pretty much stream of consciousness. The way I talk to her does not sound this way at all and I have my emotions very much in check.
She just messaged me today and she said she could hang out! SCORE! Her parents won't be back until later, WAY LATER that evening.
To the guys above me: what you see is I wrote down my pure unadulterated thoughts which are pretty much stream of consciousness. The way I talk to her does not sound this way at all and I have my emotions very much in check.
Not to be mean but why don't you stop using GAF in this fashion. I hope it works out for you but even if you think you're acting cool in front of her, deep down inside you are setting yourself up too high. It may work out, it may not. But you have not even MET her yet in person. You should temper your expectations as such.
I'm surprised; I thought that NYC was always revered as paying good (also the notorious "rubber room"). Despite how crazy NYC's public school system is, the schools in poor neighborhoods and the underperforming schools are often ignored and not well funded. Don't move to NYC for teaching. It's a nice place and all especially for single young professionals, but the public education system here sucks balls (well I had some pretty good teachers at my high school) unless you were to land yourself a teaching gig at one of the city's top tier schools.
I suppose you could try badoo.com or go to meetup.com and look for social clubs in CT; there should be plenty of them there. I think a GAF meet up would work; I seem to recall a couple of CT Gaffers interested in making one in the "Ever been to a meet up" thread. You'd be surprised by how many Gaffers there are in CT; I was and still am surprised by how many Gaffers live in NY/ the Tri-state area.
Agreed. Whenever my oldest brother invites a chick over, he makes sure to clean the room that we share as well as the living room. Even I would do that should I ever bring a woman over so it won't look like I live like a slob (well I live with my mother but she's out of town for a month). Women always want to make a good impression on a man before they invite a man over to their humble abode because it's their sanctuary; it says a lot about who they are.
Good luck max; I would suggest you be a little bit less needy and concentrate on other girls in the meantime despite this chick being the "one" like you say (which I don't think even that even exists) and do other things to take your mind off of her.
I'm going to agree with this, and what others are saying here. We are all in agreement that Max needs to pump the breaks. If you guys are texting back and forth, take one day where you don't send shit back until you are about to go sleep. This way you just say you had a super busy day, etc. It may be a white lie, but it'll let her know you have shit going on and she isn't something you are gravitating to like a lost little puppy dog.
Hopefully you two do hang out as planned, but if she blows you off again man, and with generic bull shit excuses, then you need to pull back and have her come to you. That's just the bottom line, and is 100% true.
I mean hell, the girl I hung out with yesterday hung out with me even though she had to go to the hospital and was in some serious ass pain. That shows she has serious interest even with a complete legit reason to say, "no I can't hang out today."
G'luck. Breathe.
There's the option a lot of teachers take which is to work in the inner city schools in NYC and burn out in 5 years or so, but I don't know if I really want to do that. I think maybe the Boston area might be better for me, especially since it seems there's just a lot of people with my kind of mentality around there it seems.
I don't think I could organize a meetup, too stressful for me.
o.k I have to vent out...
I am attracted to men but in the last months my sexual interest has been fluctuating or "flowing" between men and women, I just think it's hot and while I know I visually or instinctively prefer men, I go around watching women, admiring their beauty, their bodies and phantasizing about that kind of sex (straight sex, I mean) and I go checking them in real life the same way I do with men. From the hundreds of people I see in the streets and the city, the outcome is that 10 people receive a genuine "like/would" from me, around 8 men (some "kinda/sorta" and some "hot!") and 2 girls (1 kinda/sorta and 1 "hot"). I've never been with a woman cause I've been busy in relationships with men and just doing my thing but now I am single and what to try stuff I always wanted to experiment before...regarding women, I know I have a very specific kind of girl I feel attracted to, white skin, brown hair, interesting look, it's always been like that.
o.k thing is.. I found in OKC a girl that has 1 pic of her, a crappy shot at it, apparently with a low quality cam, she is in my city and wouldn't be completely against dating a guy who has had gay experiences. the pic, I am absolutely in love with it...the puzzled look and the hair.. someone tell me I am overrating it Profile from the girl here.. I feel bad because my profile is set to "gay", as it should be, but I'd really like to do something about her.. but I have fears that she'll think " wut? the fuck I am gonna do with a gay guy? waste my time, that is"... and on the other hand I don't want to lie about what I am or like or my past. fuck, I hate online dating and life and its complications. ...:´(
what to do.... you can see in her face she doesn't have overweight but says she's curvy... I want to see that....I want her to go on a date with me and I want to french kiss that mouth all night.... and yet, I dont even want to start writing a message, I feel like a stupid creepy clown.
I am attracted to men but in the last months my sexual interest has been fluctuating or "flowing" between men and women, I just think it's hot and while I know I visually or instinctively prefer men, I go around watching women, admiring their beauty, their bodies and phantasizing about that kind of sex (straight sex, I mean) and I go checking them in real life the same way I do with men. From the hundreds of people I see in the streets and the city, the outcome is that 10 people receive a genuine "like/would" from me, around 8 men (some "kinda/sorta" and some "hot!") and 2 girls (1 kinda/sorta and 1 "hot"). I've never been with a woman cause I've been busy in relationships with men and just doing my thing but now I am single and what to try stuff I always wanted to experiment before...regarding women, I know I have a very specific kind of girl I feel attracted to, white skin, brown hair, interesting look, it's always been like that.
o.k thing is.. I found in OKC a girl that has 1 pic of her, a crappy shot at it, apparently with a low quality cam, she is in my city and wouldn't be completely against dating a guy who has had gay experiences. the pic, I am absolutely in love with it...the puzzled look and the hair.. someone tell me I am overrating it Profile from the girl here.. I feel bad because my profile is set to "gay", as it should be, but I'd really like to do something about her.. but I have fears that she'll think " wut? the fuck I am gonna do with a gay guy? waste my time, that is"... and on the other hand I don't want to lie about what I am or like or my past. fuck, I hate online dating and life and its complications. ...:´(
what to do.... you can see in her face she doesn't have overweight but says she's curvy... I want to see that....I want her to go on a date with me and I want to french kiss that mouth all night.... and yet, I dont even want to start writing a message, I feel like a stupid creepy clown.
Well, it sounds pretty clear that you're Bi not gay. And just message her. It's not a big deal. Mention that you're bi if you want or say nothing and see if she brings it up. Hell, she might be flattered that she was the one that converted you to women again. Either way, you have zero chance if you message and some chance if you do. I know what I'd take. Who cares if she thinks "he fuck I am gonna do with a gay guy?". I'm sure some girls I've messaged that thought "What's that ugly fuck messaging me for?" but who gives a shit? Do what you want, man, not what you think others want.
Al-ibn Kermit
Junior Member
So the only thing that you like about her is her face? What would you want to send in the initial message?
I may as well be Bi but I don't feel that confident arranging a date over the internet with a girl I have never met, because I am not very sure of my sexual orientation and I don't want to hurt people or waste their time. In a perfect world, I'd go to a bar with a friend, get to know a girl that its appealing to me, skip/omit the whole gay/bi crap and just go ahead with whatever ocurrs to me in real time...but online dating is so intimidating, you gotta have it clear what you want /not want, otherwise it's like you aren't being honest...
you are right in the other stuff.. I really shouldn't think much about what other people think or want, I am going to give myself some time and think about what I could write... something that would be honest, interesting, to the point and charming at the same time..
it's the only thing I can see from her on her profile, she only has one pic. I want to see more of course, that would be pretty nice.
Not going to lie not having OKC during my evenings now sort of stinks. It was a fun distraction to me.
Also, I see some people in this thread doubtful of a plausible relationship forming or working out due to some shit qualities with their lives.
Personal shit that stinks for me:
* Do not live on my own/with a buddy. I am renting a room from my bro in law and my sister. This means whoever I want to potentially date has to be cool with the fact that my room is fuck tiny, and needs to like kids in case they come to bug. Or be willing to be out and about on dates/go to her place. Yes that is asking a lot, but not so much that it would undermine what I do have going on, which I'll get to in a sec.
* Low paying job. It is what it is, but it's not permanent.
* 24 and still in college, with issues getting loans. Without getting too much into it, my parents screwed me earlier in my life by having me take out a loan for school more than what I needed. Now they are doing their part to repay it, but since I dropped out that semester, even with a solid 670 some credit score/bills/job I can't get private loans. It means I can only take 1-2 classes a semester from federal loans. I'm HOPING by this spring semester I'll have built up a lot of good things with my economic status that I'll get private loans. :/
* No friends here since I moved from North Dakota, to Colorado. Luckily I have my family to spend time with, but this also can be a turn off to women.
------
So you chock those things up, and it's a fairly crappy situation right? Well I don't let it hold me down, because I have goals, dreams, and make amazing use of my time. I'm always applying to new jobs, I'm constantly working out with only 1 day off(about to start P90x this week too), and I know what I want a degree in.
I could ego swell myself with other things I like about me being me, but at the end of the day you can't let things that are temporary or minor stop you from meeting someone. Odds are whatever woman you find cool, for a potential meet up, has personal demons as well, or other baggage. It's a means of finding someone who can look past some of that crap, and you hers, so you can be better with each other.
So you don't know if you are bi, gay, straight, or a giraffe...fuck it. Go out, have your awkward first 2 minutes of talking, and then share about each others lives and see how it plays out. You have a good time, but you aren't sexually attracted? No harm done. You kindly let her know later on you had a good time, but you see it as more of a friendship. Rejection of all sorts happens, and odds are if people are using OKC they've had their fair share of relationship issues to be strong enough to deal with a minor let down. She lives 2 hours away? Well fuck, plan a fun weekend day hang out fiesta. Weekend day date goes great? Now it's her turn to come out to see you.
Be brave GAF, and keep grinding.
Also, I see some people in this thread doubtful of a plausible relationship forming or working out due to some shit qualities with their lives.
Personal shit that stinks for me:
* Do not live on my own/with a buddy. I am renting a room from my bro in law and my sister. This means whoever I want to potentially date has to be cool with the fact that my room is fuck tiny, and needs to like kids in case they come to bug. Or be willing to be out and about on dates/go to her place. Yes that is asking a lot, but not so much that it would undermine what I do have going on, which I'll get to in a sec.
* Low paying job. It is what it is, but it's not permanent.
* 24 and still in college, with issues getting loans. Without getting too much into it, my parents screwed me earlier in my life by having me take out a loan for school more than what I needed. Now they are doing their part to repay it, but since I dropped out that semester, even with a solid 670 some credit score/bills/job I can't get private loans. It means I can only take 1-2 classes a semester from federal loans. I'm HOPING by this spring semester I'll have built up a lot of good things with my economic status that I'll get private loans. :/
* No friends here since I moved from North Dakota, to Colorado. Luckily I have my family to spend time with, but this also can be a turn off to women.
------
So you chock those things up, and it's a fairly crappy situation right? Well I don't let it hold me down, because I have goals, dreams, and make amazing use of my time. I'm always applying to new jobs, I'm constantly working out with only 1 day off(about to start P90x this week too), and I know what I want a degree in.
I could ego swell myself with other things I like about me being me, but at the end of the day you can't let things that are temporary or minor stop you from meeting someone. Odds are whatever woman you find cool, for a potential meet up, has personal demons as well, or other baggage. It's a means of finding someone who can look past some of that crap, and you hers, so you can be better with each other.
So you don't know if you are bi, gay, straight, or a giraffe...fuck it. Go out, have your awkward first 2 minutes of talking, and then share about each others lives and see how it plays out. You have a good time, but you aren't sexually attracted? No harm done. You kindly let her know later on you had a good time, but you see it as more of a friendship. Rejection of all sorts happens, and odds are if people are using OKC they've had their fair share of relationship issues to be strong enough to deal with a minor let down. She lives 2 hours away? Well fuck, plan a fun weekend day hang out fiesta. Weekend day date goes great? Now it's her turn to come out to see you.
Be brave GAF, and keep grinding.
I told the girl that I stopped talking to the others on okc. She was floored; "I'm glad we're meeting soon then
Can't wait, GAF.
I'm truly rooting for you. If she bails though I know a guy who know's a guy who has seen a guy push people down stairs. She could always "have an accident" GAF style if she turns out to be a douche canoe.
It's funny; today it was off, then on, then off. Her parents were going to be late and the hang out was ON. Then they messaged her again and was like, scratch that, we will make it in on time.
Jerked around more than a porn star in front of a bunch of ladies.
Al-ibn Kermit
Junior Member
??
Anyways, try not to be too aggressive. You seem compatible but don't look at a % match rating as the holy standard of dating.
Good luck.
True Underdog
Member
God...damn...
Yeah, I've been keeping up with this thread since the first time I posted in it. Read it all the way through. I think I'm going to give this thing a shot, still hesitant, but not as much as I was before I read through this thread, some good stories.
I didn't, actually. I sent her a message based on her habits she posted in her profile.
The match thing is just a bonus.
Biff
Member
(´･ω･`)
Silly facetime
LMFAO! Fucking GAF never forgets.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I really shouldn't start a message off asking why she think creationism should be taught side-by-side with evolution, but it's a deal breaker question (silly I know). At least that woman responded, the other two haven't yet and I didn't even ask them that! The 95% match who I have a lot in common with didn't message me back after looking at my profile.
Life sucks, forever alone.
Life sucks, forever alone.
I think those match questions are based off sex, dating, and another genre of questions.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I won't be messaging her again, the balls in her court. She "replies very selectively".
Switch your main photo to one of your face. And I'd expand on the stuff in your profile a bit more.
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