Problem is other sites are not at all as common in my country. Tinder is by far the go-to app for dating, be it serious or hookups.
That said, there is no way to find out what she wants, right? You don't ask that question "what do you want from this?", that's just not reasonable. Honestly I want to keep seeing her no matter the answer, and we'll just see where it goes from there.
I wouldn't ask that, or at least I'd hook up before asking. She's probably not looking for something serious from the sound of it. Just go with the flow.
Problem is other sites are not at all as common in my country. Tinder is by far the go-to app for dating, be it serious or hookups.
That said, there is no way to find out what she wants, right? You don't ask that question "what do you want from this?", that's just not reasonable. Honestly I want to keep seeing her no matter the answer, and we'll just see where it goes from there.
Just go with the flow. You will find out what her intentions are eventually. Have fun regardless. One of my longest relationships came out of what I thought was a one night stand.
Tinder can be a hook up app, but you can get into a serious relationship off of it as well. 2 people at work are married to people they met on Tinder.
So Bumble is kinda crazy, right? I imagine some of these accounts are fake, its such a overwhelmingly large amount of EXTREMELY attractive girls. I've matched with a few (nothing came of them. Only two messaged me and they never replied past their first message.)
if you do ever date a kgirl, give you some insights on 2 simple family values. First, have a good career or it's near tough. Most kgirls are family oriented and the parents have a lot of pressure to marry a financially secure person. obviously there's exceptions, but i'm speaking for the majority. Second, even if you don't have a nice pedigree, parents want to see if you work hard and whatever you do. make sure you can show it. not that i'm an expert on the topic but pretty much work with many different parents on a daily basis =)
also depending where they live also affects how open Korean girls are to non Koreans.
majority S. Koreans migrate to where the major Korean populations are in the US:
Cali, Texas, Maryland, few in Alanta, NYC/NJ.
If they're living home in these major populations, kgirls tend to be more closed and just hang w/ other Koreans. If they're out of state and working they tend to be more open to other ethnic groups.
The Chinese/Taiwanese girls that i knew from San fran, NYC, NJ, MA, British Columbia were more open to dating outside of their ethnic group imo but i guess it's biased bc i'm already on the outside.
Wat? if you were unattractive and over the hill, i'd understand but you're not, very strange... i really don't believe you.
hmm...if you're serious, would you care to make a wager?
I'm confident you will date this year and like to propose:
if you don't date anyone in 2016 by July 4th, i will gift you a steam game of your choice but if you do, you have to gift me a 3ds game of my choice. heheh
So me and this girl were getting pretty heated on OKCupid, and all of a sudden she tells me her dog died yesterday. In a state of confusion and frustration, I replied "Boner killer, but OK..." after which she blocked me. I need to work on my game.
if you don't date anyone in 2016 by July 4th, i will gift you a steam game of your choice but if you do, you have to gift me a 3ds game of my choice. heheh
Offering an incentive to not date for 6 months is the opposite of what we should be doing...
Really though, I don't understand Leeness. She says she's looking for a male friend, yet is on every free dating site. Why not meetup? Sure, they're for "groups", but they always devolve into 2-4 people conversations. you find someone you like, exchange numbers, and voila, platonic male friend.
if you do ever date a kgirl, give you some insights on 2 simple family values. First, have a good career or it's near tough. Most kgirls are family oriented and the parents have a lot of pressure to marry a financially secure person. obviously there's exceptions, but i'm speaking for the majority. Second, even if you don't have a nice pedigree, parents want to see if you work hard and whatever you do. make sure you can show it. not that i'm an expert on the topic but pretty much work with many different parents on a daily basis =)
also depending where they live also affects how open Korean girls are to non Koreans.
majority S. Koreans migrate to where the major Korean populations are in the US:
Cali, Texas, Maryland, few in Alanta, NYC/NJ.
If they're living home in these major populations, kgirls tend to be more closed and just hang w/ other Koreans. If they're out of state and working they tend to be more open to other ethnic groups.
The Chinese/Taiwanese girls that i knew from San fran, NYC, NJ, MA, British Columbia were more open to dating outside of their ethnic group imo but i guess it's biased bc i'm already on the outside.
Thanks for the tips. My ex is half Chinese/Indonesian (born in Jakarta) and the other two Asian girls I've 'been with' were Thai and Chinese. Those things you mentioned made sense to me, considering I used to hang around my ex's family a lot when we were together.
your bet will be to be over your ex and date, no set backs, deal? =)
i don't doubt you can get a date. just want you to be over that Chinese/Indonesian girl so you don't shoot yourself in the foot with the next girl.
either way a 3ds game is cheap 30-40 so no biggie =) and steam summer sales should be right around the corner in July.
can you do it? or will i get some free games!! heheh
you know zero escape 3 is coming out right =P
your bet will be to be over your ex and date, no set backs, deal? =)
i don't doubt you can get a date. just want you to be over that Chinese/Indonesian girl so you don't shoot yourself in the foot with the next girl.
either way a 3ds game is cheap 30-40 so no biggie =) and steam summer sales should be right around the corner in July.
can you do it? or will i get some free games!! heheh
you know zero escape 3 is coming out right =P
Judging by the last 12 months, I'll be getting a Steam game for sure. I'd love nothing more than to be over my ex, I'm just finding out it isn't so simple. Dating women has been few & far between. I dunno if it's because I'm not good looking, completely uninteresting, or something else. Either way, whatever it may be, it's deterring dates fosho.
Offering an incentive to not date for 6 months is the opposite of what we should be doing...
Really though, I don't understand Leeness. She says she's looking for a male friend, yet is on every free dating site. Why not meetup? Sure, they're for "groups", but they always devolve into 2-4 people conversations. you find someone you like, exchange numbers, and voila, platonic male friend.
Not to answer for her but some people just don't like groups. I'm a very solitary person and I have to make a real effort to go out and meet people or I'll just stay home all the time. Add to that a desire for companionship but no interest in sexual intimacy and you can see that she's in in a pickle, especially if she's not in a bigger city.
Every few days I get a guy (tinder) profile pop up on my stack of profiles. Man, zero substance. Bunch selfies, next to nothing in their bio, and at least one shirtless picture.
Is that what the majority of guy profiles look like?
Every few days I get a guy (tinder) profile pop up on my stack of profiles. Man, zero substance. Bunch selfies, next to nothing in their bio, and at least one shirtless picture.
Is that what the majority of guy profiles look like?
Yup, that's pretty much 90% of profiles, just additionally thrown in stupid duckface pics for women. And stupid vague phrases like "I like all music except country and rap" "where are all the good guys?" "My kids/my job/God is number 1 in my life" and then they end it with "If you want to know anything more, just ask! lol"
It's why I would just throw out random opening lines, it's not like most profiles give you anything to work with anyway.
Been trying out Coffee Meets Bagel. I like the format, though my daily bagels have paled in comparison to the "Give and Take" options (possibly done on purpose to encourage you to pay). Got a match in the first couple days already.
Wat? if you were unattractive and over the hill, i'd understand but you're not, very strange... i really don't believe you.
hmm...if you're serious, would you care to make a wager?
I'm confident you will date this year and like to propose:
if you don't date anyone in 2016 by July 4th, i will gift you a steam game of your choice but if you do, you have to gift me a 3ds game of my choice. heheh
Offering an incentive to not date for 6 months is the opposite of what we should be doing...
Really though, I don't understand Leeness. She says she's looking for a male friend, yet is on every free dating site. Why not meetup? Sure, they're for "groups", but they always devolve into 2-4 people conversations. you find someone you like, exchange numbers, and voila, platonic male friend.
Not to answer for her but some people just don't like groups. I'm a very solitary person and I have to make a real effort to go out and meet people or I'll just stay home all the time. Add to that a desire for companionship but no interest in sexual intimacy and you can see that she's in in a pickle, especially if she's not in a bigger city.
Groups of people, especially ones I don't know? Hell no. I wouldn't "meet" anyone, because I would be hiding in a corner. :/ No thank you. I can barely deal with big groups of people that I know.
I was a Student teacher at a school like 2 yrs ago, matched with a girl who went there. Profile said 23, but she's actually 20 and said I looked like a teacher she knew in school after some talking. Ahh! I made an excuse that she was too young after finding out her real age and now Im like scared. Fuck this app.
Luckily I didnt say anything really dumb or do any flirting at all. Just some snappy tinder smart ass messages back and forth.
I looked at her IG pics and she definitely has pics from the school. She probably has a twitter or something and posted about it knowing how into social media these kids are, god dammit.
Mind is Blown... wait, define this "dating" you never did. just want to make sure we're talking about the same thing. you mentioned you got hurt in the past, was that in a relationship?
I was a Student teacher at a school like 2 yrs ago, matched with a girl who went there. Profile said 23, but she's actually 20 and said I looked like a teacher she knew in school after some talking. Ahh! I made an excuse that she was too young after finding out her real age and now Im like scared. Fuck this app.
Luckily I didnt say anything really dumb or do any flirting at all. Just some snappy tinder smart ass messages back and forth.
I looked at her IG pics and she definitely has pics from the school. She probably has a twitter or something and posted about it knowing how into social media these kids are, god dammit.
Mind is Blown... wait, define this "dating" you never did. just want to make sure we're talking about the same thing. you mentioned you got hurt in the past, was that in a relationship? (heehee you dated)
messed up! LOL, how much of an age difference was it between her real age?
man, that's ok! i think the awkward part for me personally is the former student. LOL teachers have a certain respect that students look up too. kinda weird...
man, that's ok! i think the awkward part for me personally is the former student. LOL teachers have a certain respect that students look up too. kinda weird...
I am 100% sure I never taught her. I know all of my students. She must have just seen me around... I feel like I did something unethical, and I'm trying to get hired after all, so I'd rather avoid these situations.
I was a Student teacher at a school like 2 yrs ago, matched with a girl who went there. Profile said 23, but she's actually 20 and said I looked like a teacher she knew in school after some talking. Ahh! I made an excuse that she was too young after finding out her real age and now Im like scared. Fuck this app.
Luckily I didnt say anything really dumb or do any flirting at all. Just some snappy tinder smart ass messages back and forth.
I looked at her IG pics and she definitely has pics from the school. She probably has a twitter or something and posted about it knowing how into social media these kids are, god dammit.
So you were a teacher at a school, you got matched with a student who used to go there. She is legal, you are legal, you have no chance of teaching her or even being in the same school as her. I don't see why you are freaking out.
Mind is Blown... wait, define this "dating" you never did. just want to make sure we're talking about the same thing. you mentioned you got hurt in the past, was that in a relationship?
When I was in my teens, I hung out with one guy for a month, but it wasn't dating or a relationship, and hung out with another guy for a bit, but he constantly made sure to tell me we weren't dating and he wouldn't date someone like me lol
When I was in my teens, I hung out with one guy for a month, but it wasn't dating or a relationship, and hung out with another guy for a bit, but he constantly made sure to tell me we were dating and he wouldn't date someone like me lol
Ya know, a lot the women I've talked to are terrible conversationalists :/ At least one of them was very upfront and assertive about what she wanted, which was awesome. I wasn't feeling it with her though. I think online dating/tinder has spoiled the typical getting to know you interaction. I'm not doing that dance about fretting over texting and and being expected to pick up and act on subtext. I'm pick up on all of that crap and it's annoying because it just doesn't feel natural to me. Just be straight and talk like a normal person, damn!
Yes... Which is why I said "no dating and no relationships" lol
The only thing the dude did was tell me how stupid I was, punch holes in walls near my head and let me know he was "cheating" on me, anyway so...lmao. 16 year olds hahaha.
When I was in my teens, I hung out with one guy for a month, but it wasn't dating or a relationship, and hung out with another guy for a bit, but he constantly made sure to tell me we were dating and he wouldn't date someone like me lol
The only thing the dude did was tell me how stupid I was, punch holes in walls near my head and let me know he was "cheating" on me, anyway so...lmao. 16 year olds hahaha.
^hmmm? oh i wasn't confused w/ what you wrote...
that's a gundam song about finding your dreams
(two best friends were at war fighting each other, one of the ending credits that's fitting... wish they find the way)... sorry into anime.
Ya know, a lot the women I've talked to are terrible conversationalists :/ At least one of them was very upfront and assertive about what she wanted, which was awesome. I wasn't feeling it with her though. I think online dating/tinder has spoiled the typical getting to know you interaction. I'm not doing that dance about fretting over texting and and being expected to pick up and act on subtext. I'm pick up on all of that crap and it's annoying because it just doesn't feel natural to me. Just be straight and talk like a normal person, damn!
They are bombarded with messages, which is something us guys don't have to deal with.
The ones that annoy me are the ones who reply with one liners and dont engage back. If I make an effort, Id want them to at least try back. If they dont ask me a question back at all, I just move on.
I just logged back into my OKC after taking a couple of months of hiatus and holy shit! They changed the UI! Profiles look much different now! Last time I got a visit was on the 27th of December; 7 likes, 7 visitors. I don't feel like getting back into the messaging groove quite yet (I'm damn near tempted to redownload Tinder) but I'm going to update my profile a bit--- even though my circumstances have remained largely the same complete with growing out my hair/beard---and see if I take/upload a few more recent pics. A few girls that had messaged me in the past found my profile funny but I remember Assanova's words: if you can take good pics, that will more substantial to carry it than the content of the profile.
I'm lurking on a cute girl who visited my profile in November now. I honestly still don't know what I'm looking for but it's definitely something that lasts longer than seeing a girl twice before they call it off or I disappear after the first date (even ones that went decent). For me, my approach is going to be to be less needy/stop texting girls so damn much, stay focused on my personal goals, and keep it simple/cheap. The dating pool looks so deep to dive back into so maybe I'll lightly dip my toes in before getting comfortable to get the feet in.
I'm lurking on a cute girl who visited my profile in November now. I honestly still don't know what I'm looking for but it's definitely something that lasts longer than seeing a girl twice before they call it off or I disappear after the first date (even ones that went decent). For me, my approach is going to be to be less needy/stop texting girls so damn much, stay focused on my personal goals, and keep it simple/cheap. The dating pool looks so deep to dive back into so maybe I'll lightly dip my toes in before getting comfortable to get the feet in.
Hi NYC GAF coordinator! If you dig sushi, i recommend taking your date by Tomoe, cheap prices w/ the best fatty tuna in the city! i'm going to head over to the NYC GAF thread. lol
Hi NYC GAF coordinator! If you dig sushi, i recommend taking your date by Tomoe, cheap prices w/ the best fatty tuna in the city! i'm going to head over to the NYC GAF thread. lol
Hahaha, yeah that's my secret occupation like Bruce Wayne is Batman by night! It's been a while since I wore that dusty old hat. Don't tell me you're a new city resident as well.
When you're an aspiring illustrator/college grad who's occasional jobs include taking on freelance audience gigs working at conventions, going for sushi is enough to make me cry inside a bit as much as I like it if I know I'm not going to make the money back soon. Last few dates I went on last last year, it was pretty much Starbucks, a small passion fruit tea, and two cookies.
The "artist" life means having to get my lazy ass to post my art to my Tumblr/social media so it can get noticed and work hard in addition to saving up money to table at a few cons/art to sell. Some girls don't seem to comprehend that unless they work in the arts.
Yes... Which is why I said "no dating and no relationships" lol
The only thing the dude did was tell me how stupid I was, punch holes in walls near my head and let me know he was "cheating" on me, anyway so...lmao. 16 year olds hahaha.
Hahaha, yeah that's my secret occupation like Bruce Wayne is Batman by night! It's been a while since I wore that dusty old hat. Don't tell me you're a new city resident as well.
When you're an aspiring illustrator/college grad who's occasional jobs include taking on freelance audience gigs working at conventions, going for sushi is enough to make me cry inside a bit as much as I like it if I know I'm not going to make the money back soon. Last few dates I went on last last year, it was pretty much Starbucks, a small passion fruit tea, and two cookies.
The "artist" life means having to get my lazy ass to post my art to my Tumblr/social media so it can get noticed and work hard in addition to saving up money to table at a few cons/art to sell. Some girls don't seem to comprehend that unless they work in the arts.
i hear you, i have a few friends that do 3d modeling design on another site
Macross World
one guy who maintains their facebook page is talented as hell but does free lance work and income is sporadic. helped get him a Form1 printer so he can get paid doing personal projects. he made money to pay me back this year.
born and raised on the upper west side but right now living across the river in Fort Lee, NJ.
hey man Starbucks is expensive... take your date to 53rd and 6th and it's about the same cost. LOL. i do that to load up on a few meals if i'm lazy. i just ask for no veggies so it'll last longer heheh
i hear you, i have a few friends that do 3d modeling design on another site
Macross World
one guy who maintains their facebook page is talented as hell but does free lance work and income is sporadic. helped get him a Form1 printer so he can get paid doing personal projects. he made money to pay me back this year.
born and raised on the upper west side but right now living across the river in Fort Lee, NJ.
hey man Starbucks is expensive... take your date to 53rd and 6th and it's about the same cost. LOL. i do that to load up on a few meals if i'm lazy. i just ask for no veggies so it'll last longer heheh
Nice, always cool to see friends helping friends since my friend is willing to help me invest in tabling at a few cons in exchange for an exhibitor pass. I usually have a hard time relating to girls because
What?! You live in Fort Lee?! I'm looking at Jersey right now since I live next to/under the GWB. Small world. Last time I went to Fort Lee, it was 2 years ago since I crossed the bridge by foot on Easter Sunday.
Funny that you mention 53rd and 6th because I meet with my boss at the Marriott hotel's food court on Tuesday nights on 54th and Broadway. A Live jazz band plays from 7pm-10pm. My boss keeps telling me to do date there after I finish meeting with him.
And yeah, tell me about; my brother used to work at the Starbucks on 47th and 3rd for 3 years before he snapped and got fired without merit. I've done museums in the past on a first date but realized that you can't get much conversation when you're looking at stuff and moving "on rails" so to speak. I think I'm going to get to know the bar scene around my area better for future dates since it's decent if it's not a Dominican owned business out to try to stiff people.
Bounce back, had an amazing date with this gorgeous Greek girl. Spent the night, but didn't hook up. I might see her again tomorrow, but I'm still waiting to hear back from my best friend's sister. But at this point, I think I might give up my pursuit of that. Although she's interested in me, she's definitely reluctant. I mean there's a lot that can wrong, so it's understandable.
Indian girl I met about two weeks ago and hit it off kinda flaked on me last weekend. She finally hit me up on Monday, and apologized. She said we can hang this week but I wasn't getting a vibe that she was super interested. I told her Thursday, and she agreed. Purposely didn't set details to see if she'd suggest or say something. She didn't, so in the meantime I setup the date with the Greek girl. So Thursday rolls around and she finally text me back, but I just ignored it. I do wanna see her again, but I'm not sure what to say. A little help?
Another girl I hit it off with before she left for the Holidays hit me up saying she was back in town and wanted to hang, I like her a bit too. Been talking to this petite girl who seems dtf, and an older woman who wants to play Mario Kart at her place over beer.
They are bombarded with messages, which is something us guys don't have to deal with.
The ones that annoy me are the ones who reply with one liners and dont engage back. If I make an effort, Id want them to at least try back. If they dont ask me a question back at all, I just move on.
Oh I'm well aware, I don't begrudge them that. We each have our own obstacles.
My general complaint/annoyance would be that it seems like people have gotten lazy with interaction. So yes, if a person doesn't engage, I just thank them for their time and keep on. Not long after my initial post, I actually had a good time/conversation with someone. That was nice.
^hmmm? oh i wasn't confused w/ what you wrote...
that's a gundam song about finding your dreams
(two best friends were at war fighting each other, one of the ending credits that's fitting... wish they find the way)... sorry into anime.
Might be difficult using dating sites though, even with the disclaimer that you're just looking for a friend, guys will take it to mean that you're being careful maybe, but not that you're serious. Or are you using a website/app that's actually for friendship type deals?
Oh I'm well aware, I don't begrudge them that. We each have our own obstacles.
My general complaint/annoyance would be that it seems like people have gotten lazy with interaction. So yes, if a person doesn't engage, I just thank them for their time and keep on. Not long after my initial post, I actually had a good time/conversation with someone. That was nice.
Some people are just bad at online interactions. I don't send/receive many messages, so when I do get a back and forth going I'll move quickly to set up a date. If they stop responding, so be it. I give almost everyone a chance, though.
yeah man, sounds like you had a little trama back then.
i had a friend went through something similar in college (boyfriend choked her in public, he got expelled) she reacted same way. wish you well w/ that geeky song.
What?! You live in Fort Lee?! I'm looking at Jersey right now since I live next to/under the GWB. Small world. Last time I went to Fort Lee, it was 2 years ago since I crossed the bridge by foot on Easter Sunday.
Funny that you mention 53rd and 6th because I meet with my boss at the Marriott hotel's food court on Tuesday nights on 54th and Broadway. A Live jazz band plays from 7pm-10pm. My boss keeps telling me to do date there after I finish meeting with him.
And yeah, tell me about; my brother used to work at the Starbucks on 47th and 3rd for 3 years before he snapped and got fired without merit. I've done museums in the past on a first date but realized that you can't get much conversation when you're looking at stuff and moving "on rails" so to speak. I think I'm going to get to know the bar scene around my area better for future dates since it's decent if it's not a Dominican owned business out to try to stiff people.
awe yeah, some rice and bean w/ pigeon peas and ox tail.
if you ever date a DR girl, a good ice breaker joke:
What's the most popular deodorant in D.R.?
Raid.
LOL
always gets a laugh =)
Lived in Inwood right above Washington Heights all my life and grew up w/Irish and Dominicans.
but yeah, i'll move this convo to NYC GAF thread =)
Might be difficult using dating sites though, even with the disclaimer that you're just looking for a friend, guys will take it to mean that you're being careful maybe, but not that you're serious. Or are you using a website/app that's actually for friendship type deals?
Yeah, the problem is that there are other girls out there on dating sites that will list that they're looking for friendship, but it's codeword for casual hookups or fwb. Looking for platonic friendship on a dating just sounds counterproductive. That kind of close female-male friendship certainly is possible, one of my best friends is a girl. But guys on dating sites are not looking for friendship, so you start off attracting the wrong crowd and barking up the wrong tree. The context matters.
Some people are just bad at online interactions. I don't send/receive many messages, so when I do get a back and forth going I'll move quickly to set up a date. If they stop responding, so be it. I give almost everyone a chance, though.
I think that there is a matter of people having different expectations for interactions. Meaning, some people like to respond immediately, some think it is cool to wait a day. That leads to mixed signals.
I got matched with a woman on tinder today and we started going back and forth and all of a sudden she just un-matched and disappeared. I was thinking exactly what I said that was wrong. The only thing I could think was that I joked about not taking medicine for a sore shoulder because part of being male is being stubborn. After that, she was out the door, lol.
One thing that online dating has taught me is that there are truly other fish in the sea, ALOT OF THEM. If it doesn't work with one person, there are others out there. But man, it does get exhausting chatting/meeting people. It almost feels like a waste of time on some days.
