That's... pretty good man lol. I'm guessing the photo caused the quick demise.
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Online Dating |OT| Please Respond
- Thread starter Jhoan
- Start date
That's... pretty good man lol. I'm guessing the photo caused the quick demise.
davidwhangchoi
Member
LOLMy joke female tinder account only survived a day
Got a few funny replies out of it. Holy shit though, the men of tinder sure like "hey", "what's up", "sup" openers. The few who actually got the joke and came up with a clever reply were rare.
PapaJustify
Member
It turns out I had really connected with this girl on Tinder. We only texted since Tuesday and I thought I blew it, but I tried one more time after my post here and me being persistent kinda really clicked with her. And we have a lot in common and lots to talk about. So I asked her out for a drink or two. She is really my type.
Yeah, so I met with her earlier tonight and she is really cute and we had a lot to talk about. And lot of the stuff came really natural, not much awkward silence - you know what I mean.
I was really positive and had a good time. Halfway I suggested we'd get one more drink, but she refused, which kinda surprised me, because at that moment it felt like she just wanted to get out of there. But I just got myself a beer and we kept talking. So when I finished my beer, she suggested that we could go for a walk (it's pretty cold right now) and I took that as a positive sign. So we walked a bit and kept talking and I even walked her home in the end.
We said good night, she said it was "nice" and we agreed that we would keep texting.
I really felt it was a great night, but I can't really tell if I have chances with her.
Well, I stay mildly positive.
(Thanks to Pasta_Soup for the tips)
Yeah, so I met with her earlier tonight and she is really cute and we had a lot to talk about. And lot of the stuff came really natural, not much awkward silence - you know what I mean.
I was really positive and had a good time. Halfway I suggested we'd get one more drink, but she refused, which kinda surprised me, because at that moment it felt like she just wanted to get out of there. But I just got myself a beer and we kept talking. So when I finished my beer, she suggested that we could go for a walk (it's pretty cold right now) and I took that as a positive sign. So we walked a bit and kept talking and I even walked her home in the end.
We said good night, she said it was "nice" and we agreed that we would keep texting.
I really felt it was a great night, but I can't really tell if I have chances with her.
Well, I stay mildly positive.
(Thanks to Pasta_Soup for the tips)
MonorailCat
Member
Spent a night in a different city for a job interview about 500km away and got more tinder matches in these 24 hours than the last 6 weeks in my hometown.
Either the tinder algorithm does some weird stuff if you travel ... or I should move.
Either the tinder algorithm does some weird stuff if you travel ... or I should move.
Glad it went well, but keep your options open. Women usually do, so if she arbitrarily decides she isn't interested, you won't feel too bad. Just don't put all your eggs in one basket, is what I mean.
Same thing happens to me whenever I visit family in my hometown 2000 miles away.
Nobody in the city you visited had seen your profile before. You had a potential audience of thousands. Compare that with the number of women that haven't seen your profile in your hometown, and you'll realize why this isn't uncommon.
Welp, Nurse chick asked what was I look for on Bumble. I told her I don't know but definitely not my future wife. She then asked if I was looking for something serious to which I replied that I'm not opposed to it but I'm not really looking to rush into one since it's not high priority.
She agreed so I think we both know what we want here: something casual since it works for me and it works for her. Plus she lives 15 minutes away from me across the bridge and on her own (I live at home but my mom doesn't care if I bring a girl over) so win-win.
In other news, I got a text from artist girl out of the blue over idle banter about the weather. Going to keep playing it cool with her and be lax with the texting. Got messaged by another girl on Bumble complementing me on my double denim (I wonder what that means and which picture(s) she's referring to).
Lastly, I got hammered yesterday and went on a big Like/small messaging spree on OKC. One of the girls I messaged was a 40 year old Hispanic MILF who had lurked on my profile and has an amazing body with nice curves (!!!). Normally I don't go past 30 since I'm intimidated by older women but a few friends and my brother told me to go for it. A few hours later, lo and behold, I got this reply back:
The message I sent out? Who wins in a battle of good and evil? Harry Potter or Godzilla? Umm...thanks hammered me! If things go well from there, I'm going to be in for one hell of a ride!
It looks I'm getting back into the balancing act of juggling multiple women at once much to my chagrin because I've still got my mojo. I fear for my wallet this upcoming week but I'll be keeping a close eye on it and relist my stuff to get rid of in the BST thread.
She agreed so I think we both know what we want here: something casual since it works for me and it works for her. Plus she lives 15 minutes away from me across the bridge and on her own (I live at home but my mom doesn't care if I bring a girl over) so win-win.
In other news, I got a text from artist girl out of the blue over idle banter about the weather. Going to keep playing it cool with her and be lax with the texting. Got messaged by another girl on Bumble complementing me on my double denim (I wonder what that means and which picture(s) she's referring to).
Lastly, I got hammered yesterday and went on a big Like/small messaging spree on OKC. One of the girls I messaged was a 40 year old Hispanic MILF who had lurked on my profile and has an amazing body with nice curves (!!!). Normally I don't go past 30 since I'm intimidated by older women but a few friends and my brother told me to go for it. A few hours later, lo and behold, I got this reply back:
The message I sent out? Who wins in a battle of good and evil? Harry Potter or Godzilla? Umm...thanks hammered me! If things go well from there, I'm going to be in for one hell of a ride!
It looks I'm getting back into the balancing act of juggling multiple women at once much to my chagrin because I've still got my mojo. I fear for my wallet this upcoming week but I'll be keeping a close eye on it and relist my stuff to get rid of in the BST thread.
Date was canceled due to the Blizzard, even if I wanted to see her I wouldn't have been able to because of the suspended service on the trains. She said, " aww I can't see you sniff sniff". Heading out there in a bit however, we're going to play in the snow.
Was Tindering last night to see if anyone wanted some Blizzard company, but that didn't work out. Got a number at least. Going to try and go on some dates this coming week, since we aren't official and I don't wanna come off as too thirsty.
Was Tindering last night to see if anyone wanted some Blizzard company, but that didn't work out. Got a number at least. Going to try and go on some dates this coming week, since we aren't official and I don't wanna come off as too thirsty.
Pasta_Soup
Member
Glad it went well, man! If you end up on a second date with her, don't be afraid to hold her hand or go for a kiss. If she's wants to see you again then she's obviously attracted to you. Need to continually escalate to keep things interesting and on the right path. High risk, high reward (and it's not even really high risk, it's just easy to get caught up in the fact that it is).
PapaJustify
Member
I will remember your advice for a second date.
But that is actually the next problem. How do I follow up on the date to actually get another?
There has been radio silence since the date yesterday and I am not sure if I should have contacted her today, but I thought it might be a good idea to let the impressions settle in for a day and text her tomorrow. I hoped that she maybe reaches out but she didn't. Maybe she is waiting for me to make a move (again) or maybe she is just happy with the silence because she is actually not interested and wants to cool it out.
I am going mad here with all the thoughts of what to do and how to act next. lol.
Look, the only way of taking charge in gauging her interest is to ask her out for a second date. Yeah if she did text you first that would be a sign as well, but it's very unreliable since the guy is often the doing the leading, regardless of the girl's interest. Chit-chat if you want to, but the best way is just to go something like "Hey I had a great time last night, we should get together soon again! How about X at Y?" where X is an activity and Y is a date+time.
Question: If one closes the tinder app while on a person, is it counted as a swipe left?
Because I was saving a super like for this one person I've encountered at some tournaments (had about a few minutes) and accidentally swiped up on my iphone to close the app. Haven't encountered her since despite setting it to the same mileage range.
A tragic set of affairs really, but nothing too serious.
Because I was saving a super like for this one person I've encountered at some tournaments (had about a few minutes) and accidentally swiped up on my iphone to close the app. Haven't encountered her since despite setting it to the same mileage range.
A tragic set of affairs really, but nothing too serious.
neurosisxeno
Member
So this girl I work with popped up on my Tinder the other night, and I swiped Right just to see what happened and we got matched like 5 minutes later. I'm friends with her on FB and have commented on some statuses here and there but we had never been too chatty. I started messaging her through Tinder and she suggested moving to FB since she barely checks the former, and we've been talking pretty regularly.
Not sure how to interpret anything though. I'm trying not to assume too much, because on the base level we are co-workers to some extent (we work on opposite ends of the site though), but we've only been around each other once outside of work (at a bar) and my then GF said she was hitting on me. She also has said some things that I normally would say are flirting, but I don't know her well enough to assume that's the case here.
Not sure how to interpret anything though. I'm trying not to assume too much, because on the base level we are co-workers to some extent (we work on opposite ends of the site though), but we've only been around each other once outside of work (at a bar) and my then GF said she was hitting on me. She also has said some things that I normally would say are flirting, but I don't know her well enough to assume that's the case here.
No. They will show up again at some point.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Unsurprisingly, I know how you feel. My date wasn't canceled because of the blizzard, but I did walk to her house in advance of Phase II of snowfall on Saturday. We made dinner, watched a terribly great B-movie on Netflix (Zombeavers, by the way, which is everything you'd hope for and more), drank some wine, and studied for her architects' examination. This morning, she made me breakfast while I shoveled outside, then we chatted with her sister and studied some more. While digging out her car, we definitely threw snowballs.
I spent the night on our first date, as well as the second (and we've done nothing physical other than make out). Seeing her again Friday for dinner -- "if not sooner," she claimed -- and I can't wait. Like you, I don't want to be too thirsty either, except we already had a weird convo last night: I told her that I was married before, and we admitted that we really liked each other, etc. etc.
But still. I don't want to be too eager, but at the same time, I really don't want to date random girls. How are you coping other than Tindering?
I feel your pain. I was on TanTan with this dropdead gorgeous half thai/half chinese chick. I was planning to go meet her in Singapore. Then somehow my matches got messed up and our convo and match (and some other, less important ones) disappeared. I have been trying to find her since then, but my heart is pretty broken. We were even planning a lingerie photoshoot with her and a model friend. Speaking of, does anyone know how to find the most popular people on Instagram in certain countries? She showed me her friends instagram and she had 410k followers, but my dumbass didn't follow and I forgot her name. That's the only way I can foresee finding my long lost tantan match.
True Savior
Member
I'll have a few months off with online (tinder) stuff. It can be overwhelming. The amount of people you get to talk. The amount of interactions (I start to forget who told me what). The amount of people who reject you. The amount of people you actually have interest and reject you. And the silences. Holy shit. Like, I am used to it, Tinder is a fucking awesome app that allowed me to meet women in a crazy way that I thought it was impossible but the silences...i just can't deal with some. Some girls straight up stop talking. I understand them .I understand the abundance. I understand how boring it can be to them. But there's always those 1-2 girls that you are into and bam. They just stop before there was even a chance to be remotely interesting. It's not like I don't do the same, but I think i try to be polite, especially when I'm addressed.
As a note, Tinder Plus works. I caved and tried it. The 5 super likes/12hr are gold. I had 200-something matches in 3 months with my previous profile and i had 170 in 1 month. Considering I saw a lot of profiles I had previously matched but didn't swipe...you can notice how good it works. In a hugely populated area it's probably even better.
With time I've learned that the more formal/rigid the conversation is on Tinder, the lesser the chances are that it goes somewhere. That sort of question usually fits that type of conversation (unless it's a very sexual-direct approach, which is rarer). Even so, when it happens, I just try to be honest. Meeting women and its quite incredible that I can have my phone on my pocket and creating a chance to make some kind of social interaction (not in this horrible english that i just wrote though)
No. Next time put it on background and before going to the app make sure you have the wifi/data on..she'll still be there.
As a note, Tinder Plus works. I caved and tried it. The 5 super likes/12hr are gold. I had 200-something matches in 3 months with my previous profile and i had 170 in 1 month. Considering I saw a lot of profiles I had previously matched but didn't swipe...you can notice how good it works. In a hugely populated area it's probably even better.
With time I've learned that the more formal/rigid the conversation is on Tinder, the lesser the chances are that it goes somewhere. That sort of question usually fits that type of conversation (unless it's a very sexual-direct approach, which is rarer). Even so, when it happens, I just try to be honest. Meeting women and its quite incredible that I can have my phone on my pocket and creating a chance to make some kind of social interaction (not in this horrible english that i just wrote though)
No. Next time put it on background and before going to the app make sure you have the wifi/data on..she'll still be there.
Alright good.
Haha that is a tragic set of events. Not even sure how I'd feel about that.
Sound advice, will keep in mind.
Kid Kamikaze10
Member
So update:
All that worrying from that other post? All in my head; she so busy she's on the verge of a burn out.
Which sucks for her, but it also means I spent most of last week worrying about nothing.
Just got home after spending the night with her. We didn't really play in the snow, we actually met up with her best friend at a happy hour. It was nice, but I got pretty hammered. I passed out as soon as we got back and slept for a million hours. Not a good look. I got plans to check out a flick with her on Thursday, and she invited me to a friends house party next Saturday. Those are both off my off nights, already given to her. So much for talking to different women... though the truth is I work overnights, and I do not like setting up dates before I have to go in. But I might start with other people, we'll see. I have so many conversations on Tinder going, so many numbers, I been getting a ton of Bumble matches too but I don't really care. I know I shouldn't, but I just want to spend my off nights with her. I'm going to try and set up a date or two on a work night with someone else this week, though all I'm worried about right now is if I made a good impression with her best friend.
But man, I have this it's-to-good-to-be-true feeling and I been over analyzing our interactions a lot.
dskillzhtown
keep your strippers out of my American football
Most times, talking things out to see what is going on instead of making assumptions is the best route. I had a similar issue, I thought a woman wasn't into me, but the truth was that she was going through a rough time with her family. I have her some space and let her work though the issues, and we were much better for it.
PapaJustify
Member
Well, oh well. I tried and I got the "I'm pretty busy in the next weeks" answer. That is just too bad. I really had high hopes for that one
Well, oh well. I tried and I got the "I'm pretty busy in the next weeks" answer. That is just too bad. I really had high hopes for that one
Too bad. But hey, at least you know instead of worrying now
PapaJustify
Member
Too bad. But hey, at least you know instead of worrying now
Yeah, it's definitely a relief. She left the door open a bit, saying "Let's see...", but I am too realistic about what's going on.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
You've got it bad. Honestly, I might be heading that way too, but it's too soon to feel that way (on my end: only two dates for me, even if both were overnighters), no matter how good it's been so far. It feels, I don't know, vaguely unethical to initiate stuff with other girls -- I had two that I'd been dating casually, and I'm letting them fizzle out, and I've got another one on OKC that I've exchanged a couple of messages with.
I don't know. I went out with friends tonight. I'm seeing the Brazilian girl tomorrow night for coffee, then meeting friends for dinner. And I think I'm getting dinner with the Brazilian Friday night (I hope). I can still be "busy" without dating other people, I guess.
I'm starting to feel like both you and Lulubop are pushing it too hard with trying to date other people. If you both like these girls, then stick to them. While dating multiple people is generally good advice as you both know, I think forcing yourself to date casually in an attempt to not get one-itis is a bad idea. Just be chill instead.
Lone_Prodigy
Member
Had a really good first date over the weekend. I was feeling uncharacteristically nervous before it and was running on not a lot of sleep, so I'm surprised things went so well. Got another date lined up this week and I'm finding it really hard to not get ahead of myself here.
I was supposed to meet up with the jewel artist girl yesterday but she said that her friend was wishy-washy with their earlier plans and wanted to meet later because the friend in question lost their job (I get the impression it was a date from a gut feeling). I suggested that we change it to another day so she can hang out with the friend and went to my alma mater to get some work done for my boss that's due today and type up a cover letter draft for an internship. I checked my phone two hours later to realize she had finally decided she wanted to meet up but it was too little, too late; we agreed to meet tomorrow night so all is well.
As a disclaimer, she told me that she had changed her hair color to blonde (all her pics are of her as a brunette with long hair) and cut her hair but it doesn't bother me even if it's a bit dishonest/misleading. She also casually mentioned that she has a dog which is a slight turn off for me because I'm not a big fan of dogs/pets in general (not listed in her profile). If she's wishy-washy again tomorrow, I'm going to leave the ball in her court and move on because her survey question revealed that she's hesitant but willing to meet people from OKC.
I never heard from the nurse girl again. To be honest, I'm not even mad about because again, I found her constant/inquisitive texts annoying at best so it's not a loss for me at all; going to umatch her on Bumble.
Other messages on OKC and Bumble are going pretty solid. The 40 year old lives at least 2 hours away from me and is rather serious with her messaging tone but I'm still on board. Might end up meeting up with the 32 year old Irish lady from Bumble on a whim.
As a disclaimer, she told me that she had changed her hair color to blonde (all her pics are of her as a brunette with long hair) and cut her hair but it doesn't bother me even if it's a bit dishonest/misleading. She also casually mentioned that she has a dog which is a slight turn off for me because I'm not a big fan of dogs/pets in general (not listed in her profile). If she's wishy-washy again tomorrow, I'm going to leave the ball in her court and move on because her survey question revealed that she's hesitant but willing to meet people from OKC.
I never heard from the nurse girl again. To be honest, I'm not even mad about because again, I found her constant/inquisitive texts annoying at best so it's not a loss for me at all; going to umatch her on Bumble.
Other messages on OKC and Bumble are going pretty solid. The 40 year old lives at least 2 hours away from me and is rather serious with her messaging tone but I'm still on board. Might end up meeting up with the 32 year old Irish lady from Bumble on a whim.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
I agree. I'm not dating anyone else, and I decided to stay busy by hanging out with friends more. Solves that problem nicely, I think.
Finally met with the art girl. It wasn't bad at all. She seemed a bit shy but we seemed to have a lot of common as expected. She was tired so she cut it short early. I would like to ask her out again but I get the impression that she sensed that I'm on a tight budget. She was cool though and looked exactly as her pics. We'll see what happens but if she says she wasn't feeling it, then it wouldn't surprise me. I can't but help but think how much she looks like my old high school Biology/Geology teacher, I swear.
Another girl I'd message asked me out for drinks/coffee so more dates are on my plate in my near future and lots of messages to get to respond.
Another girl I'd message asked me out for drinks/coffee so more dates are on my plate in my near future and lots of messages to get to respond.
I was going to make a big post in here but figured that yeah, this thread is a dry well. I think it goes back and forth at times between the Dating-Age thread and this thread but the former thread is way more active that many people forget this thread exists. I still lurk. Here's my cross-post from last night:
Should say I had another amazing date with this girl. We saw the Revenant, I really liked it, more than she did. Afterward we went to this BBQ spot, and she was very touchy and cuddly. It was nice. She thinks I'm super attractive, and that's a good feeling. She's stunning in here own right. Seeing her again tomorrow and meeting a lot of her friends at a house party. A little nervous.
How do you it man? Having successful dates? Stuff like that would kill my wallet! Maybe it's something I'm not seeing but I've been having a hard time hitting it off with girls in person lately. I think I have to do some more work to do on myself.
Small update on the girl who stopped replying to my texts yesterday: I sent her a text today and she said she wasn't interested in texting and decided to move on. In my defense, I told her that I wanted to meet up with her but I didn't mention that I didn't want to come off too strong.
Lesson learned here: a little less conversation, a little more action. I might be wrong here, but I feel like she should have been direct from the moment I texted her since I'm still oblivious to that stuff. After all, she suggested the idea in the first place. On the other hand, looking at it from her shoes, she really liked me, gave me a chance, but in the end I didn't take the hint to make the plans, so she felt rejected/annoyed, and cut her losses.
My brother and I are planning on participating in the Global Game Dev Jam tonight so that should take my mind off of things. I really feel like my online dating adventures would make a really good autobiographical comic series personal project so I'm going to work on some model sheets and scripts over the coming weeks.
Well it was the same girl I've been seeing the last 3 weeks. I think we gel really well, and since I've only been going on dates with her I have more money to spend. As for other girls, I'm not sure. I think I'm pretty uninteresting, I grew up really introverted, some whats socially awkward and I have this dull tone in my voice. I take it I'm more attractive than I think I am, as swallow as that sounds. I was on a hot streak from the beginning of December, and what I would do before a date was have two drinks. I honestly think that helped me a ton on those dates. Another thing I learned was too be more aggressive, respectfully of course. I had a few dates in the past that went really well the first hour or so but burned out after. What I should have done, and what I did start to do was suggesting to go back to there place.
Ok, so fuck. Last night went really bad. I matched with this girl on Tinder and the girl I was seeing kinda knew her? Or they like just so happen to meet yesterday at a house party thing. It was weird, but she was really upset. I told we weren't exclusive, but she was hurt I was still looking. I didn't have an answer for why I was. I really hope I didn't fuck this up, I'm be pretty down if things change between us.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
You could ask her why she was upset. If she's basically heading towards the DTR discussion, then it's maybe time for you to say that you don't want to look elsewhere either and that you've really enjoyed the past three weeks. Basically, now's the time to demonstrate a little emotional vulnerability if you want to be with her.
Do it in person, though, not via text.
By the way, you did have an answer ("I really want to be with you, but I'm afraid that you don't like me as much as I like you and don't want to be exclusive"), but you smartly didn't voice it like that.
The question is: do you want things to change? Based on your posts, I think you do. The status quo, where you like this girl but mindlessly swipe on Tinder to hedge your bets, isn't working for you.
I was soo apologetic, but she had a hard time believing me. I told her I'd delete the app, only focus on her, etc and she wasn't having it. I've been very open to her about my Tinder hookups and what not, but she's been open too. She must have this idea in her mind that I'm a complete dog tho. This all happened last night at that party, she took me outside to talk. I think we were both a bit drunk. After awhile she kept saying, "you couldn't be more patient with me"? Blah, I feel like she doesn't think I'm boyfriend material now or worried I'll still be on this apps.
Lol, I checked her recent friend on FB and sure enough a girl I had matched with on Tinder who then checked out my OKC profile yesterday and in turn made me message them on OKC. Small world.
She said she meet her at a house party on Friday.
I imagine the conversation where I was brought up went something like this;
Are you seeing someone?
Yea, he's a cool guy
Oh yea? Do you have a picture of him?
Here's his Facebook
Oh, he looks familiar. I think I talked to him on Tinder.
Lol, I checked her recent friend on FB and sure enough a girl I had matched with on Tinder who then checked out my OKC profile yesterday and in turn made me message them on OKC. Small world.
She said she meet her at a house party on Friday.
I imagine the conversation where I was brought up went something like this;
Are you seeing someone?
Yea, he's a cool guy
Oh yea? Do you have a picture of him?
Here's his Facebook
Oh, he looks familiar. I think I talked to him on Tinder.
So, I haven't been around for a long while, but I thought I'd drop by to ask a very important question:
One of my friends suggested that I try looking outside my city (or even province/country) for a compatible person. Another one of my friends, when I asked her about this suggestion, seemed to think that this was a good idea too because it builds on my strengths, namely written communication. I should add that a fair number of my friends did meet their SOs online and out of the country, and they're quite happy with what they have. However, I'm still hesitant on the idea, namely because I'm not quite sure how it would expand my current prospects, as well as a desire to have physical presence within a relationship (due to some bad experiences).
What are your thoughts on LDRs? Or rather, looking for a LDR from the start?
One of my friends suggested that I try looking outside my city (or even province/country) for a compatible person. Another one of my friends, when I asked her about this suggestion, seemed to think that this was a good idea too because it builds on my strengths, namely written communication. I should add that a fair number of my friends did meet their SOs online and out of the country, and they're quite happy with what they have. However, I'm still hesitant on the idea, namely because I'm not quite sure how it would expand my current prospects, as well as a desire to have physical presence within a relationship (due to some bad experiences).
What are your thoughts on LDRs? Or rather, looking for a LDR from the start?
Evening all. Quick question.
After having a dry spell for the past few months on Tinder and OKC, I decided to restart my tinder account. Within a week I had 60+ matches, and not only that, but quite a few of them actually messaged me first.
As a result, I've got 5 dates lined up this week (the 5th being a second date with a girl I just went on the 1st one with today).
Things with this 1st girl went quite swimmingly, I enjoyed it! We grabbed brunch, and when I dropped her off at her place, she suggested we grab drinks Wednesday night.
Here's the thing though: I found out that, coincidentally, her dad actually works at the same company I work at. I'm a visual designer there, and he's a project manager (so of course, he is higher ranking than me). I've seen his cubicle as I've walked past it many times (his name being on the front of it). I haven't actually met the guy, nor do I work on any of the projects he manages. His daughter also lives on her own, so I wouldn't have frequent contact with this guy outside of work if I started dating his daughter or anything like that.
Is dating this girl a bad idea? Would there be repercussions, do you think? It's always said not to date your coworkers, but I'm not sure if this counts.
After having a dry spell for the past few months on Tinder and OKC, I decided to restart my tinder account. Within a week I had 60+ matches, and not only that, but quite a few of them actually messaged me first.
As a result, I've got 5 dates lined up this week (the 5th being a second date with a girl I just went on the 1st one with today).
Things with this 1st girl went quite swimmingly, I enjoyed it! We grabbed brunch, and when I dropped her off at her place, she suggested we grab drinks Wednesday night.
Here's the thing though: I found out that, coincidentally, her dad actually works at the same company I work at. I'm a visual designer there, and he's a project manager (so of course, he is higher ranking than me). I've seen his cubicle as I've walked past it many times (his name being on the front of it). I haven't actually met the guy, nor do I work on any of the projects he manages. His daughter also lives on her own, so I wouldn't have frequent contact with this guy outside of work if I started dating his daughter or anything like that.
Is dating this girl a bad idea? Would there be repercussions, do you think? It's always said not to date your coworkers, but I'm not sure if this counts.
I think that it depends on where you are at in your life. I tried it quite a few times last year and wouldn't do it again. I was going through an experimental phase and learned a lot from it. There is a lot of work involved and I really only think that it can work if you both are experienced and have the money and time to see each other at least once every 2-3 weeks. You also have to have great communication skills.
It can work, but I would only use it as a last resort. People in small towns kind of don't have a choice once they reach a certain age, but if you live in a major city, I would stick to dating in or near it. If you live in a major city and can't find anyone there, then I really think the problem is you and not the women in your city.
stn
Member
You probably just nicked her ego, man. Nobody likes to know that they've been replaced - especially not with someone they know. On a side note, I think this thread should be merged with the dating-age thread. Very similar content, no need for two threads. Just IMO.
The Broken Ska Record
Member
I've started trying dating apps again, and I'm just not having any luck at all.
kopitarrulez_11
Member
I've been in the same boat as you
I have the same sentiment. It's not that I can't get dates these days, but rather that nothing really comes from any of them. A lot of it can be chalked to a lack of chemistry.
To clarify, my city is mainly blue collar with a bit of a boomtown mentality. Nothing wrong with any of that, but it's hard to find unattached people who have a more metropolitan and urban outlook on life... as in a big city girl rather than a country girl.
Fallout-NL
Member
ClosingADoor
Member
I wouldn't go out and look for a long distance relationship actively. If it goes that way, you can try it. But to actually message people from another country, seems like a giant waste of time. Do you really want to talk to someone for weeks or months before meeting up and then discovering you are not really compatible after all?
Then again, I already have a hard time keeping a conversation going after a few messages and rather move it to real life, so who knows.
Why are you asking us if it's creepy or rude? Surely you are the judge of that. What you should make of it is that the person is interested in you.