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[Lone_Prodigy]

It's not that, but just in general. It just feels like a numbers game, where you throw shit on the wall and hope things stick.

It is a numbers game. You're competing with guys who are just as good-looking, athletic, funny, and successful as you are. Plus girls have to filter through all the creeps. I don't envy them.

Heck, just look at GAF and this thread. Most guys and girls here are pretty good-looking and pleasant.

 

[SRG01]

It's not that, but just in general. It just feels like a numbers game, where you throw shit on the wall and hope things stick.

It is a numbers game. You're competing with guys who are just as good-looking, athletic, funny, and successful as you are. Plus girls have to filter through all the creeps. I don't envy them.

Heck, just look at GAF and this thread. Most guys here are pretty good-looking and pleasant.

Dating is a numbers game only if it's online. A lot of the conventional rules about dating are either reversed or changed outright on those sites. That's why online dating can be unpleasant, because it's such a drastic difference compared to what most people are used to in real life.

 

[OriginofHysteria]

It is a numbers game. You're competing with guys who are just as good-looking, athletic, funny, and successful as you are. Plus girls have to filter through all the creeps. I don't envy them.

Heck, just look at GAF and this thread. Most guys here are pretty good-looking and pleasant.

There should be a GAF matching service haha

 

[Halcyon]

There should be a GAF matching service haha

Everytime i've checked someone's okcupid profile from here, it's been like a 94%+ match. It makes me laugh and also makes me cry because you fuckers are all nerdy as shit.

Spoiler

I'm nerdy as shit

 

[potam]

Girl here - "lol."

sup boo

 

[Luigi87]

Girl here - "lol."



Selection bias

)=

Edit:
That feeling when someone you're conversing with disables her account.
Oh well -- if it means she met someone else (hopefully), best of luck to her.

 

[NoctisVsStar]

I've been wondering once you become official, how do you guys go about telling your friends/family members on how you met? Like I understand some don't care or judge and just tell them online, but what about the rare instances where it's frowned upon among your friends and family ? Do you make up an elaborate story for instance:"met in college"
or something along those lines.

I've been curious about that.

 

[AlphaTwo00]

I've been wondering once you become official, how do you guys go about telling your friends/family members on how you met? Like I understand some don't care or judge and just tell them online, but what about the rare instances where it's frowned upon among your friends and family ? Do you make up an elaborate story for instance:"met in college"
or something along those lines.

I've been curious about that.

Don't make up a story, as long as someone knows, it will be known. Making up something, and then having it blown is going to be MUCH worse.

 

[potam]

Don't make up a story, as long as someone knows, it will be known. Making up something, and then having it blown is going to be MUCH worse.

I don't care if my friends know. I just don't want to explain to my parents that I met a girl off Tinder. That's probably not even that big of a deal, but I still associate it in my head as a hook up app, rather than a dating app (although it is now).

My partner is a GAFfer

you see this av girl

 

[NoctisVsStar]

I met my partner online! I just tell people he's the older brother of one of my real life friends (he is technically the older brother of a guy who I have a friend in common with.)



My partner is a GAFfer

That's a pretty good excuse in my book.

 

[NoctisVsStar]

I don't care if my friends know. I just don't want to explain to my parents that I met a girl off Tinder. That's probably not even that big of a deal, but I still associate it in my head as a hook up app, rather than a dating app (although it is now).



you see this av girl

I see it's perfectfully normal for you guys that's awesome! From a Latino perspective Jipan could probably understand but my parents would probably be ashamed of me lol that's why I asked I tried it once out of curiosity had success we messed around and whatnot but she wasn't into looking into something serious and after that I stopped online dating and continued the old fashion way.

At times I feel an itch to try it again, but then I think to myself man what would I say to my parents.

 

[SRG01]

My partner is a GAFfer

 

[Smiley90]

Why would you have to lie about online dating in this day and age? My mom met her boyfriend of 8 years online. Both my parents know I met my last girlfriend online and that I'm using it. My mom was even trying to (awkwardly) give me advice lol.

But seriously, in this day and age, online dating isn't as frowned upon anymore, you shouldn't be afraid of saying it.

I met my partner online! I just tell people he's the older brother of one of my real life friends (he is technically the older brother of a guy who I have a friend in common with.)



My partner is a GAFfer

-looks around-

 

[SRG01]

For the first time in my life, I'm having a huuuuge problem thinking of a second date idea. I'm usually good with dates, but this girl is so down to earth that all my ideas seem like I'm trying too hard.

 

[Smiley90]

For the first time in my life, I'm having a huuuuge problem thinking of a second date idea. I'm usually good with dates, but this girl is so down to earth that all my ideas seem like I'm trying too hard.

gelato.

if you already did that, coffee.

if you did both of those on the first date - good man. also, botanical garden/somewhere to walk where it's park-ish.

 

[SRG01]

gelato.

if you already did that, coffee.

if you did both of those on the first date - good man. also, botanical garden/somewhere to walk where it's park-ish.

I was thinking of gelato, but it isn't that warm outside these days It looks like we're getting an early fall/winter. We have an indoor botanical garden here, but the problem is that it's not a great botanical garden. We could go to a couple of others, but it's getting sort of chilly in the evenings.

 

[Jhoan]

It is a numbers game. You're competing with guys who are just as good-looking, athletic, funny, and successful as you are. Plus girls have to filter through all the creeps. I don't envy them.

Heck, just look at GAF and this thread. Most guys and girls here are pretty good-looking and pleasant.

Pleasant? Lol. That's one adjective I rarely see getting used to describe attractiveness. Maybe I'll use that as an opening line on Tinder one of these days: "Girl you're as pleasant to look at as an iPhone 6."

I see it's perfectfully normal for you guys that's awesome! From a Latino perspective Jipan could probably understand but my parents would probably be ashamed of me lol that's why I asked I tried it once out of curiosity had success we messed around and whatnot but she wasn't into looking into something serious and after that I stopped online dating and continued the old fashion way.

At times I feel an itch to try it again, but then I think to myself man what would I say to my parents.

I live with my mother. Whenever I go on a date and she asks where I met the girl at, I have no shame in saying I met her online. She usually asks me what the girl's ethnicity is, gives me a vocal seal of approval, wishes me good luck, and tells me not to get home super late.

You see living with a single mother, she tried her hand at online dating many moons ago in the early 2000s. She noticed that my bros and I were on this online dating website called MiGente as teens and wanted to meet guys. So we made her a profile and added pictures. She had several guys hit her up and went out with a bunch of them hence why she's totally cool about it. She wants to see me happy no matter how I meet girls. No taboo here; I have a sinverguenza (it means "without shame" for non-Hispanic GAF members) attitude about it. She just tells to stay far away from Dominican women since they're no good (I've had bad experiences with them so I don't date fellow Dominicans).

I find it ironic that what caused you to throw in the online dating towel was that you wanted a serious relationship but she didn't. I'm at the point where I'm happy being single and don't really want a long term relationship any time soon but I'm content taking a see-how-it-goes approach to it.

Hell, I have no shame telling friends I've met girls through Tinder/OKC. Then there are friends that still have too much pride/stigmas about online dating to even make a profile and they're around my age. It's a dumb mentality in my humble opinion.

You want my advice? Follow that itch and scratch it. Scratch it real good. There's no shame in being honest to your parents how you met the girl; she's human like the rest of us in the end of the day whether you picked her up at a strip club, a convention, or met her on the hottest hook up app of late. It's that simple.

I've been noticing that I've been on a bit of hot streak with Indian girls; I started talking to another Indian girl two days ago via Tinder and hit it off with her; got her number today, exchanged several texts before she stopped replying (she's a 28 year old professor) and we're slated to hang out on Sunday. Never gone out with an Indian girl before but I have an Indian female friend that's pretty cool so I think it'll be fun. I believe we're supposed to sketch but I have no idea where yet since I told her I draw people in the subway and wanted to show her my sketchbook.

 

[Kyne]

I was thinking of gelato, but it isn't that warm outside these days It looks like we're getting an early fall/winter. We have an indoor botanical garden here, but the problem is that it's not a great botanical garden. We could go to a couple of others, but it's getting sort of chilly in the evenings.

aquarium, walk in the park, bookstore, movie store..

on one of my first dates we walked around a place that had tons of movies. We got to point out what we liked/didn't like/thought about all kinds of films. Made for some good banter and conversation.

 

[SRG01]

aquarium, walk in the park, bookstore, movie store..

on one of my first dates we walked around a place that had tons of movies. We got to point out what we liked/didn't like/thought about all kinds of films. Made for some good banter and conversation.

LOL

That reminds me of a date I had with one of my exes. We went to Blockbuster to walk around and discovered that they were having their liquidation sale. Ended up buying lots of DVDs, BRDs, and TV shows

 

[Jhoan]

The Sunday sketch date with the professor Indian girl has been confirmed and locked in. She's been super cool about communication and being serious about meeting up unlike the other Indian girl from California. She was also impressed when I told I had finished recording my Ice Bucket Challenge video prior to responding to her.

We're going to a museum (The Met here in NYC) to draw a bunch of statues and probably walk to the Central Park Petting Zoo afterwards assuming things go well/weather permitting. The best thing about going to The Met is suggested donation which means I'm going to donate 2 pennies or maybe 50 cents if I'm feeling mighty generous for 2 tickets. It'll be her first time going to the museum so which also means that I can geek out and show around the museum (I've been to that museums dozens of times).

Apparently her mother used to be an artist so I think she has some decent drawing skills. I plan on schooling her in drawing but probably will troll her initially by holding back and drawing stick figures. It's gonna be all about keeping it light and fun. I'm excited for it way more than I am for my first day of classes in several hours on account that it'll be my first date in a month.

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

I have a good friend who met her boyfriend online (on POF of all places). She said that "online just seemed logical for a couple of shut-ins like us."

 

[Jonogunn]

I've met most of my dates online. Closest friends always know where they came from but for others I some times make it up instead.

 

[y2dvd]

So, when you send out a short message with maybe a few words and questions, and you get one word replies, that's a sign to not bother correct?

Usually but I've gotten some to work. I usually call them out on their short answers and it gets them to open up more. Just be ready to put in some effort with these people who gives short answers. If they bothered to answer in the first place, there's some sign of interest, no matter how small it is lol. They are usually just busy I think.

For the first time in my life, I'm having a huuuuge problem thinking of a second date idea. I'm usually good with dates, but this girl is so down to earth that all my ideas seem like I'm trying too hard.

I went on a 2nd date recently where we went to a bar for a bit and then walked in a park at night. It was pretty romantic if I do say so myself lol. Find one with a pond or lake. It just adds to things.

 

[RandyBobandy]

Ok, gave POF a shot again and this girl messaged me. She is making all the moves. Really forward and everything. Kinda like it..

Seems relatively normal, too!

 

[Phil S.]

I'd love to get feedback on my OKCupid profile, but I'm a bit anxious to share with the entire GAF community, even despite knowing a lot of the community is really nice. Could some folks PM me for a link?

Also, I haven't been having luck on said site, so I'm wanting to go to a subscription-based site. Would a three month subscription on Match.com, for instance, be a good start? Would I get more responses back since folks are paying for the service?

 

[davepoobond]

You're basically cutting through a lot of the noise with a paid site. You could still potentially get nothing out of it. I'd say less scammers and more active users overall.

Id say its probably worth it depending on the kind of relationship you're looking for. I'm not at that point yet personally, but it might have to happen

 

[marcurius]

So I went on my first Tinder date last friday (and first date in general for quite some time, I've been in a bad slump...). I had a good time and she seemed to as well, and she suggests that we meet up at a club on saturday as she was going out with some friends, I was unsure of my plans and say I'll get back to her tomorrow. Turns out I'm free for the evening, let her know through text, and eventually head there with a friend. I tell her we're there by text, but she doesn't respond and I don't see her. I text her again the following day asking if she wants to meet up some other time and she eventually responds with some smalltalk and and saying no to further dates. I'm a little bummed about that, but whatever, you know, and finish with a nice to meet you, take care.

So fast forward to today, and being the schmuck I am I send her a message through Tinder with a link to an article where a coworker of mine was featured with his ice bucket challenge, since I'd told her about it during our date. She responds with a haha etc, and says she'd been thinking about me today. And now my insecurity and inexperience kinda shines through and I'm not quite sure what to respond. I mean, it's really easy to read that as 'I might've changed my mind and maybe I wanna see you again', no? Which I'd certainly be up for. Any thoughts?

 

[megamerican]

So I went on my first Tinder date last friday (and first date in general for quite some time, I've been in a bad slump...). I had a good time and she seemed to as well, and she suggests that we meet up at a club on saturday as she was going out with some friends, I was unsure of my plans and say I'll get back to her tomorrow. Turns out I'm free for the evening, let her know through text, and eventually head there with a friend. I tell her we're there by text, but she doesn't respond and I don't see her. I text her again the following day asking if she wants to meet up some other time and she eventually responds with some smalltalk and and saying no to further dates. I'm a little bummed about that, but whatever, you know, and finish with a nice to meet you, take care.

So fast forward to today, and being the schmuck I am I send her a message through Tinder with a link to an article where a coworker of mine was featured with his ice bucket challenge, since I'd told her about it during our date. She responds with a haha etc, and says she'd been thinking about me today. And now my insecurity and inexperience kinda shines through and I'm not quite sure what to respond. I mean, it's really easy to read that as 'I might've changed my mind and maybe I wanna see you again', no? Which I'd certainly be up for. Any thoughts?

If she flat out said no to future dates she's not interested.

 

[Kyne]

If she flat out said no to future dates she's not interested.

thissssssssssss.

sorry mate. she was probably trying to be nice.

 

[marcurius]

Oh well, responded jokingly but I guess that's that. Got another date lined up on sunday, let's hope that turns out better.

 

[SRG01]

I'd love to get feedback on my OKCupid profile, but I'm a bit anxious to share with the entire GAF community, even despite knowing a lot of the community is really nice. Could some folks PM me for a link?

Also, I haven't been having luck on said site, so I'm wanting to go to a subscription-based site. Would a three month subscription on Match.com, for instance, be a good start? Would I get more responses back since folks are paying for the service?

As much as people say subscription-based sites don't work, all the anecdotal experience I've heard -- as well as personal experience -- say otherwise. I mean, you're going to get less casual encounters obviously, but the quality of the people there are generally better than the free sites.

As far as the number of responses, the mechanics of that work exactly the same as free sites. You're still competing against a multitude of other men. The only difference is what the other person is looking for.

I've mentioned this already, but I found eHarmony to be absolutely amazing. It's a little pricey though, so you might have to wait until a sale or promo period comes up. Their matching is a little different too, since the services itself matches you instead of you searching for matches.

 

[Ghost_Messiah]

So I went on my first Tinder date last friday (and first date in general for quite some time, I've been in a bad slump...). I had a good time and she seemed to as well, and she suggests that we meet up at a club on saturday as she was going out with some friends, I was unsure of my plans and say I'll get back to her tomorrow. Turns out I'm free for the evening, let her know through text, and eventually head there with a friend. I tell her we're there by text, but she doesn't respond and I don't see her. I text her again the following day asking if she wants to meet up some other time and she eventually responds with some smalltalk and and saying no to further dates. I'm a little bummed about that, but whatever, you know, and finish with a nice to meet you, take care.

So fast forward to today, and being the schmuck I am I send her a message through Tinder with a link to an article where a coworker of mine was featured with his ice bucket challenge, since I'd told her about it during our date. She responds with a haha etc, and says she'd been thinking about me today. And now my insecurity and inexperience kinda shines through and I'm not quite sure what to respond. I mean, it's really easy to read that as 'I might've changed my mind and maybe I wanna see you again', no? Which I'd certainly be up for. Any thoughts?

Hmm. TBH I'd say she's not interested since she outright declined any potential future dates but I think the whole "I've been thinking about you today" kind of shrouds that conclusion in mystery. If I were you I'd be straightforward and direct and just ask her out again if you're unsure. The worst that can happen is she can decline and say no.

I'm of the perspective of "I'd rather she say no than never know" and I think that rings true here. Good luck!

 

[Oblivion]

Cross posting from the Dating-age thread.

Well, I got an interesting story to tell y'all.

So this morning I'm walking over to class and this very cute girl and I start walking along the same path. While I wanted to talk to her, I decided not to, both because I was in kind of a hurry, and cause I was too tired to go through the effort.

So I start walking past her, and I notice that she was keeping up the same speed. I felt like that was odd, but I also thought it wasn't anything. A few minutes after following me, to my surprise, she taps me on the shoulder and starts talking to me. She starts off by asking if it was my first semester (I guess I still look pretty young), and where I transferred from. So we talk for a bit about my college history, and I'm feeling pretty good cause hey, this cute girl I wanted to talk to is talking to me on her own. Then the conversation takes an interesting turn.

Her: So...do you live by yourself?
Me: No, there's one other person.
Her: Family or friend?
Me: Friend (actually, it's my mom, but I thought it'd be wise not to mention that)
Her: Oh that's good.
Me: Yeah, it's okay.
Her: Well, I was just wondering because as I was walking behind you, I noticed your shoes.
Me: My shoes?
Her: Yeah, they seem to be falling apart.
Me: Oh... Yeah, they've seen better days, haha.
Her: Right, and it's because of that, that I thought you might be in trouble or something.
Me: Uh..."trouble"?
Her: Yeah, you know...
Me:...Ohhhhhhhh. No, no it's not what you think!
Her: It's okay, I'm just saying..
Me: No, really I'm good!

So it went on like that for a few minutes where I tried to explain to her that I wasn't really poor, just that I (meaning my mom) bought some really cheap shoes that picked an awful week to break down.

So there I am feeling pretty embarrassed and depressed because now I'm thinking this chick was only talking to me cause she was feeling sorry for me.

BUT...

It turns out that this story has a seemingly happy ending after all. Here's what happened next.

Her: Well, I just want you to know that if you do need help, you can call me.
Me: Thanks, I appreciate that...
Her: Here, let me give you my number.
Me: Uh...okay.
Her: Maybe we could even get coffee or something some time?
Me: (I'm slightly taken aback when she says that) Uh, yeah sure definitely.
Her: Okay, this was a really convoluted way to exchange numbers, but it works.

I honestly don't even remember what I told her after that I heard last line. What the hell, right?

Needless to say, I was feeling pretty good. This makes the second time I've ever had a girl directly ask me for my number. Fuck yes!

 

[davepoobond]

I don't know why but I felt like she is some sort of Religous club member or something.

 

[Ghost_Messiah]

I don't know why but I felt like she is some sort of Religous club member or something.

She's a Scientology rep trying to recruit him. Just kidding dude. Pretty awesome story. She's clearly romantically interested in you (took the initiative to talk to you, willingly handed over her number which is something girls rarely do) so well done! You're onto something really promising and positive there.

Make sure you call her! Ask her out and let us know how it goes.

 

[ReturnOfTheRAT]

Two dates, the last one on Monday night ended with me walking her home and finished with two long kisses.

I texted her on Tuesday and she said she wasn't going to be available until the weekend. (Felt like a red flag to me.). After that I texted her good night messages on Tuesday and Wednesday night.

This afternoon (Thursday) I sent this to her:

My all day meeting is on break right now. I hope that you've been doing something more exciting than that. Have a nice day [REDACTED].

7 minutes later:

Hi ReturnOfTheRAT. Ive been thinking about this, and I think I need to tell you that I don't think I'm feeling this relationship romantically. I'm not responding adequately to the amount of communication and contact you want to have, and I don't think it's the right thing for me right now. I really enjoyed getting to know you and going out with you, but don't think this is the time to take it further. I'm sorry.

Well that's that.

 

[Oblivion]

I don't know why but I felt like she is some sort of Religous club member or something.

Haha, yeah I was actually thinking the same thing at first. But she didn't carry or hand me a pamphlet/bible or anything, so I figure it's safe to be around her.

She's a Scientology rep trying to recruit him. Just kidding dude. Pretty awesome story. She's clearly romantically interested in you (took the initiative to talk to you, willingly handed over her number which is something girls rarely do) so well done! You're onto something really promising and positive there.

Make sure you call her! Ask her out and let us know how it goes.

Thanks.

How long long do you guys think I should wait before I contact her? And should I call or text?

 

[Kyne]

Haha, yeah I was actually thinking the same thing at first. But she didn't carry or hand me a pamphlet/bible or anything, so I figure it's safe to be around her.



Thanks.

How long long do you guys think I should wait before I contact her? And should I call or text?

uh.. maybe tomorrow afternoon? The start of the weekend seems to be a good time for those kinds of things.

she asked you to call, I'd call. Open up with something clever like, "So I tripped over my shoes today and thought about you."

... or something like that? Haha I'm so bad at this..................

 

[Ghost_Messiah]

How long long do you guys think I should wait before I contact her? And should I call or text?

Two days. No more than that. Whether you call or text is irrelevant. If she's interested she'll respond regardless of the mechanism you use. I used to strongly believe in calling to show boldness and confidence but then managed to get many a girlfriend by just texting them and asking them out and have since used that mechanism ever since.

Try to be friendly, outgoing and nice in the text and you should be fine.

 

[NoctisVsStar]

Cross posting from the Dating-age thread.

Well, I got an interesting story to tell y'all.

So this morning I'm walking over to class and this very cute girl and I start walking along the same path. While I wanted to talk to her, I decided not to, both because I was in kind of a hurry, and cause I was too tired to go through the effort.

So I start walking past her, and I notice that she was keeping up the same speed. I felt like that was odd, but I also thought it wasn't anything. A few minutes after following me, to my surprise, she taps me on the shoulder and starts talking to me. She starts off by asking if it was my first semester (I guess I still look pretty young), and where I transferred from. So we talk for a bit about my college history, and I'm feeling pretty good cause hey, this cute girl I wanted to talk to is talking to me on her own. Then the conversation takes an interesting turn.

Her: So...do you live by yourself?
Me: No, there's one other person.
Her: Family or friend?
Me: Friend (actually, it's my mom, but I thought it'd be wise not to mention that)
Her: Oh that's good.
Me: Yeah, it's okay.
Her: Well, I was just wondering because as I was walking behind you, I noticed your shoes.
Me: My shoes?
Her: Yeah, they seem to be falling apart.
Me: Oh... Yeah, they've seen better days, haha.
Her: Right, and it's because of that, that I thought you might be in trouble or something.
Me: Uh..."trouble"?
Her: Yeah, you know...
Me:...Ohhhhhhhh. No, no it's not what you think!
Her: It's okay, I'm just saying..
Me: No, really I'm good!

So it went on like that for a few minutes where I tried to explain to her that I wasn't really poor, just that I (meaning my mom) bought some really cheap shoes that picked an awful week to break down.

So there I am feeling pretty embarrassed and depressed because now I'm thinking this chick was only talking to me cause she was feeling sorry for me.

BUT...

It turns out that this story has a seemingly happy ending after all. Here's what happened next.

Her: Well, I just want you to know that if you do need help, you can call me.
Me: Thanks, I appreciate that...
Her: Here, let me give you my number.
Me: Uh...okay.
Her: Maybe we could even get coffee or something some time?
Me: (I'm slightly taken aback when she says that) Uh, yeah sure definitely.
Her: Okay, this was a really convoluted way to exchange numbers, but it works.

I honestly don't even remember what I told her after that I heard last line. What the hell, right?

Needless to say, I was feeling pretty good. This makes the second time I've ever had a girl directly ask me for my number. Fuck yes!

Happy for you bro!! I wish this happened to everyone here or searching for someone, you should kiss your mom for those crappy shoes.

 

[Jhoan]

Good luck you two! I love reading about happy stories like this it feels like a personal victory, even though I have done nothing hahaha.

Funny/awkward story about that girl. My brother who's also on Tinder via our laptop with the Bluestacks app (he has a god awful smartphone with shitty internal memory) said that he got hit up by her because he recognized her name. I showed him her profile to confirm that we were both talking to the same girl and told him that I have a date with her on Sunday whereas he's only beginning to talk to her.

There was a moment of epiphany where we both gave each the "Oh brother" look, had a laugh about it, and I broke the silence by saying that it's inevitable that we're going to be talking to the same girls on Tinder as opposed to on OKC where we haven't hit up the same girls. I told him that if the date doesn't go well, he can go to town with her. It's gonna be so awkward if I show the girl a picture of my brothers and it dawns on her too lol.

Cross posting from the Dating-age thread.

Well, I got an interesting story to tell y'all.

So this morning I'm walking over to class and this very cute girl and I start walking along the same path. While I wanted to talk to her, I decided not to, both because I was in kind of a hurry, and cause I was too tired to go through the effort.

So I start walking past her, and I notice that she was keeping up the same speed. I felt like that was odd, but I also thought it wasn't anything. A few minutes after following me, to my surprise, she taps me on the shoulder and starts talking to me. She starts off by asking if it was my first semester (I guess I still look pretty young), and where I transferred from. So we talk for a bit about my college history, and I'm feeling pretty good cause hey, this cute girl I wanted to talk to is talking to me on her own. Then the conversation takes an interesting turn.

Her: So...do you live by yourself?
Me: No, there's one other person.
Her: Family or friend?
Me: Friend (actually, it's my mom, but I thought it'd be wise not to mention that)
Her: Oh that's good.
Me: Yeah, it's okay.
Her: Well, I was just wondering because as I was walking behind you, I noticed your shoes.
Me: My shoes?
Her: Yeah, they seem to be falling apart.
Me: Oh... Yeah, they've seen better days, haha.
Her: Right, and it's because of that, that I thought you might be in trouble or something.
Me: Uh..."trouble"?
Her: Yeah, you know...
Me:...Ohhhhhhhh. No, no it's not what you think!
Her: It's okay, I'm just saying..
Me: No, really I'm good!

So it went on like that for a few minutes where I tried to explain to her that I wasn't really poor, just that I (meaning my mom) bought some really cheap shoes that picked an awful week to break down.

So there I am feeling pretty embarrassed and depressed because now I'm thinking this chick was only talking to me cause she was feeling sorry for me.

BUT...

It turns out that this story has a seemingly happy ending after all. Here's what happened next.

Her: Well, I just want you to know that if you do need help, you can call me.
Me: Thanks, I appreciate that...
Her: Here, let me give you my number.
Me: Uh...okay.
Her: Maybe we could even get coffee or something some time?
Me: (I'm slightly taken aback when she says that) Uh, yeah sure definitely.
Her: Okay, this was a really convoluted way to exchange numbers, but it works.

I honestly don't even remember what I told her after that I heard last line. What the hell, right?

Needless to say, I was feeling pretty good. This makes the second time I've ever had a girl directly ask me for my number. Fuck yes!

Awesome man. I have a similar story today with it being my first day of classes as well. I was waiting to speak to the internship coordinator when I saw this cute girl waiting outside as well. I struck up a conversation with her, got a really good rapport/vibe from her, and thought to myself: "This girl is awesome, I can totally get her number." Eventually it's her turn to see him and comes back out. She says it was nice to meet me and heads out. Like a moron that I am, I forgot to go after her and ask for her number. This was my mental image as I was speaking to the internship coordinator:

But on the plus side, I'm in an art class where the ratio of girls to guys is 4:1 with me and a gay dude being the only dudes in that class. There was a part where the TA told us to mingle and already sense interest from several girls so I have 0 competition. Gotta love being an art student. My confidence has been on fire today talking to girls. I'll keep the momentum going throughout the semester.

 

[Phil S.]

I figured I'd post my OKCupid profile here, as having people PM someone relatively new might seem weird to others. I didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable. Quote to reveal, and please be gentle! hehe I'd love some pointers on how I can improve my profile and perhaps my chances at more responses!

 

[GrizzNKev]

Well, I'm single now, and I live near Seattle. Should I do this?

 

[Kyne]

I figured I'd post my OKCupid profile here, as having people PM someone relatively new might seem weird to others. I didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable. Quote to reveal, and please be gentle! hehe I'd love some pointers on how I can improve my profile and perhaps my chances at more responses!

In the things you like/are interested section, be specific. The -only- way I was able to land my current gf (who I met off OkCupid) was because of the specifics we shared.. not that it'll make or break the profile, but anything helps.

 

[SRG01]

In the things you like/are interested section, be specific. The -only- way I was able to land my current gf (who I met off OkCupid) was because of the specifics we shared.. not that it'll make or break the profile, but anything helps.

It also helps to not write everything down. Be specific, but not overly revealing. You need to have somewhere for the conversation to go.

Another good strategy is to write down those interests, but in a way that invites further conversation.

 

[potam]

reposting what I just put in the regular dating thread. Guys, don't feel bad if you can't get any dates. You're saving yourselves the hassle.

Holy fucking shit. I think I found the craziest chick within a 50 mile radius of Atlanta.

I'm tired as fuck so I'll keep this short. Met a girl off Tinder last week. Insanely hot. We hit it off and everything seemed to be good to go. We went to dinner last night, and ended up going back to her place to drink and smoke. Long story short, she's a total bitch to me half the time, then all affectionate the other half. Like seriously two different people. She cried, complaining about being completely alone in the world. Calling me an asshole for some reason (because I'm a man). Talking about wanting to kill herself. Then the next instant she's all over me.

The only reason I didn't chuck deuces last night is because I was actually afraid she might kill herself. Either way, I was willing to chalk it all up to her being extremely drunk and not being able to handle the weed. Nope. Woke up this morning to leave for class, and had her basically go back into the same "oh you're an asshole and you're leaving me" shit.

Bunch of more shit going along with all that, but I just want to go to sleep at this point. I left telling her to call me later today, just so I can try to gauge whether this was a one-off situation or not (I already know the answer). She continued to flip flop between hating me and cuddling, and said she wasn't going to call since "women don't call the guys." Whatever.


Oh and as I was walking out of her bedroom, she tells me she thinks she loves me...but then threw in "as a friend" since I think she realized what she was saying.


Jesus.


edit: and I thought this was funny. Literally (literally) immediately after talking about how she couldn't stand how fake people were, she decided we should do a selfie photo shoot, and proceeded to pose and take 1903923515 pics and correct my posture and instruct me on how to pose.

I'm almost positive if I'd have ended up having sex with her (she was way too drunk for me to even consider it), I'd be catching a rape charge today.

 

[davepoobond]

Haha

Ridiculous. I think the selfie shoot is th weirdest part, honestly. Then other stuff seems normal-crazy

 

[Phil S.]

Oops. I had it so only other OKCupid users could see my profile. I've changed that so more people can give me their thoughts and suggestions on improvements.

Thanks for the advice so far!

 

[davepoobond]

well, got another match on Coffee Meets Bagel and she is actually talking to me... for now.

currently texting back and forth, probably will ask her to meet up next week sometime

 

[TimeEffect]

So I tried this, and got a few good convos. Stopped talking to two of the girls because they were...off. One of them has a large Twitter following and keeps calling herself ugly and using the word "faggot" to describe herself. That's just weird.

But I met this one chick who even asked for my FB...but she has never responded back after I added her/she accepted. There's not even a "Read" receipt, but she must have seen it. She hasn't been online on OKC since, and she rarely is on Facebook, but pops up occasionally for a bit.

I already sent two texts: one saying Hey [name]. Then I sent another one saying "Hey!" when she was online. Still nothing.

I think I'm going to ask her to pls respnd.

It can't be that I'm ugly either: neither of us had pics on the site, and traded during our inbox chat.

Then she asked for my FB, which I figured was a good sign. How do I even proceed..it's weird to have someone on FB who I never met