People who are constantly late

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Brianimaniac said:
I don't understand how this is possible if you're an adult without a learning disability. This isn't far off from saying you burn yourself every day because you can't keep track of which part of the pan not to touch.
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You assume it's associated with learning. I'm nowhere near dumb, but I'm pretty absentminded. There are lots of brilliant people - like professors - that are exactly like this. Or they forget other small things. You can't relate, I understand. But comparing it to a learning disability is hilariously off-base.
 
This is a major problem with people from the subcontinent to the point there's the term DST, desi standard time, at least an hour after whatever hour you're expecting.
Really annoying. -_-
 
I've gotten a bunch of shit for being late from a couple of friends lately. I have trouble getting motivated to even go to stuff, so getting there early is a goal that's a little ways away now. Sucks to have people mad at you though.

Never be late to work though.
 
Wow, this thread is toxic. Some of y'all really do need to chill out.

Went to brunch yesterday and my friends were 40 minutes late, it's cool. They let me know they were running late, I just had a bloody and chilled on the patio. If I am late I always do give an eta, but I'm not always late. My sister is always late, but she has a 5 year old daughter (my niece lol), so it's cool.

Unless its business related or something with an actual hard start time like a movie, or you explicitly tell them that you have another thing to do at x time after meeting up, I don't see what the big deal is. Seems like a lot of unnecessary stress and drama.
 
Just had an experience like I described in my previous post justifying why I don't like arriving on time. I had a meeting scheduled today at 12:30, where I would be discussing a potential job offer. In my mind I already know what's going to happen, but I do the "normal" thing and I arrive 5 minutes early.

So at 2:00 PM my potential employer comes to greet me and says "can you give me 20 more minutes?" Eventually the 5 minute meeting occurred at 2:50pm.
 
I prefer to be on time but two small kids makes it tough to predict what time you'll be ready.

Like I'll aim to be out the door half an hour before I need to and I'm still late.
 
There are certain things I will be late for (on purpose), like meeting with friends at a bar, showing up to a party, etc. I have just always felt weird being on time or showing up early for those type of things lol.

However, if it's an appointment or work? 15-20 minutes early, always.
 
I used to be late all the time. Really came down to being in a shitty situation emotionally, financially, and physically. I lived 90 minutes from work, so a 5- or 10-minute delay on one end would have a ripple effect on the whole thing that could set my commute back 20 or 30 minutes (there's a world of difference between 7:15 traffic and 7:30 traffic in a city). I hated being late; despite being highly motivated to perform, meeting all deadlines, and doing good work, I was labeled as the guy who's always late. Which creates more stress, which leads to lack of sleep, which leads to being late again. And if you're the "15-minutes-late guy" you become the scapegoat for everyone. Not the guy who shows up to the office on time but half-asses everything. Not the woman who makes catastrophic mistakes every year despite working for the company for ten years. It's the 15-minutes-late guy that's not pulling his weight around here.

The way I changed it was to get the fuck out of that job and find one that was only a 25-minute commute, and to improve my overall emotional health to the point that I wasn't kept up all night by stress and panic attacks. Now I'm on time every day and I'm only the scapegoat because I'm in my late twenties so I'm the Young Guy. Which still sucks, but I'm more comfortable with that than being thought of as incompetent.
 
I haven't read through this whole thread besides the original OP and a few posts after that, but how many "If you're late, I'm cutting you off from my friends circle" responses has there been so far ?
 
Vermillion said:
You assume it's associated with learning. I'm nowhere near dumb, but I'm pretty absentminded. There are lots of brilliant people - like professors - that are exactly like this. Or they forget other small things. You can't relate, I understand. But comparing it to a learning disability is hilariously off-base.
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I'm absentminded as well. My brain is always off somewhere other than the here and now, and I have a very loose sense of time. However when I commit to be somewhere at a certain time, I'm almost never late. I always plan to leave earlier than needed. If it's an important thing, I'll remember to check the time more frequently as it approaches. If I think I'll forget about it, I'll set an alarm. Being on time can easily be done if you care.
 
This seems to be a cultural thing. Cultures view time differently. I find that in the United States time is treated as a commodity. So if you are late, then you're wasting that person's time, it is incredibly rude, and impolite. I also tend to take this view. A coworker was suppose to show up for a meeting at 8am, and they didnt get there until 8:15am. The boss chewed them out, and the coworker got so mad. She was confused, she even said that a meeting time is for when people should start to show up, not when the event is suppose to take place.

The opposite of this is crappy too. My family expects you to be ready to leave at an earlier time than what was given. So if we were suppose to leave the house at 2pm, and your not ready to go by 1:45pm then they'll get a little huffy.
 
Kaako said:
I can't fucking stand people who are constantly late. I now cut them off and just stop inviting them to places. If you don't respect my time as I respect yours, you sure as shit ain't worth my time.
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Im this way too. Once or twice is okay but to keep on doing it is beyond vexing. What makes it worse is when they dont even inform you they will be late.
 
Multitaskers and/or people with busy lifestyles have issues with lateness I find. They underestimate the time it takes to do stuff, and get hit with obstacles more often.

Then there are people who gamble being on time to fulfill instant gratification like me, lol. But I'm always on time even still.
 
My gf's always late. Always. To the point where I book restaurants at x-time and tell her it's x-time minus 30 minutes cause then we can get to our reservation on time.

Funny enough, it's a trick my dad taught me as my mom's usually late as well :p
 
Sorry, I got caught up running errands. What's this thread about again? I bet this joke has been made. I think that makes it better?
 
terrdactycalsrock said:
This seems to be a cultural thing. Cultures view time differently. I find that in the United States time is treated as a commodity.
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Yeah, but it goes both ways. If you or I am late to our appointed hour, neither you or I should take offense if the "party has started without you", so to speak. That's how I've always viewed it - event starts at X. If you come at Y, you're still welcome, but don't get in a huff if we started without you, therefore your appetizer goes uneaten because we've already had dinner or whatever the equivalent is. I honestly expect all adults to be cool with the above situation. If they're not, there's a lot more friends to make who are, and I'll find those people instead.

Seriously, if you're cutting people off who are late, you're going to end up with the most uptight friend group in the world. Why plan events if all you're doing is suffering anxiety on whether or not you're getting there when it starts?
 
We call it Zambian Time here and basically if someone says to meet at 16:00, they mean 18:00.Unless you are me, then 16:00 means 15:45. Time matters a lot to me.
 
"I'll be there around [x]" and "I'll be there at [x]" have very, very distinct meanings for me.

In the former (which is always used for social settings or casual situations), get there within 10-20 minutes over or under is fine, it's not that serious. Luckily the friends I have do have the similar mindset.

In the later (usually important appointments or very specific meetings), I will definitely try to be there early just in case something goes awry.

It's really more about feeling out the context of the situation.
 
Mrs. Stinkles is chronically late for everything. I don't mean ten minutes, I mean an hour.

She MUST be doing it deliberately at a subconscious level. Here's a real example:



Come on, we gotta go, parking is a nightmare

HOLD ON

We're late

WAIT A MINUTE

Come on

I'LL BE DONE SOON


We're going to be a full hour late, what exactly are you doing?

BALANCING THE CHECKBOOK ON A SUNDAY AFTERNOON.
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Like, wat? How could that not wait?
 
I'm late for gatherings, not late for meetings. It's ok.

I've been late for work for the last 2 years but they're relaxed about it as long as you put the hours in. I do enjoy my 10am starts.
 
If they're intentionally just trying to be "fashionably" late then I just stop inviting them to things.

If it's a business associate who's always late, I stop inviting them to the meetings. You know those meetings where we decide who gets promoted and all that important shit? They don't get invited.

Too fucking bad.
 
I hate it. I'm always early and it stresses me out if i'm late, or if someone i'm meeting is late. But kinda got control issues...
 
If its something important, I'll be there nice and early.

If its my friends who have a history of being late, I'll be one of the latest ones. I used to be real punctual until I had a enough and now i run on my own time. I'll tell them be ready at 7 for pick up. I'll then show up at 7:45.
 
As a parent with two kids, my time is precious. If I have something planned without the kids, you had better be on time. Those moments are practically gold.
 
I'm pretty much always all time or early. I'm rarely late. I don't care if someone else is late by a few minutes, but I don't like having my own time wasted and will leave if they're really late. People who take 5 hours to get ready for the littlest things and still manage to be late piss me off beyond belief though.
 
I'm late sometimes, I don't really care about waiting on people either. If it's something important (work, etc.) or something that's dependent upon good timing (a concert, a film, etc.) then I'll make efforts, but if it's just meeting up with someone? Be late, let me be late, society revolves too much around time as it is.

I recommend some of you go camping sometime and don't take a watch, leave your phone switched off for a few days unless you need it, just let time pass without counting every second. We're too eager to fit as much as we can into one day, always taking on new tasks and slotting them into schedules... where's the time for introspection? Slow down.
 
I'm also one of those people that is always late, even though I've gotten better at it. As for reasons why? it's difficult to pinpoint just one, since it's dependent on the situation...

When it comes to work-related stuff, one of the reasons is that I would have to engage in social conversations I don't like, talking to people I don't like... , so that's one reason for trying to arrive 'just on time', which occasionally will make me late.
For social events with friends I'm usually 5 - 10 minutes late. I'd try to be on time but there's always something I've forgot at the last minute that I just have to do. Since it's just friends hanging, I don't care too much. I'll let them know I'll be a few minutes late and that's that. Don't see a problem with it.
If it's something with a clear set time and people depend on me (going to the movies f.e.), I'll be on time because I don't want to be the asshole that made everyone miss the start of the movie.

Most of the time when I'm late I'll have some reason but in the end it boils down to bad time management.

One thing to remember though, is that being on time, isn't as easy for everyone and not just a matter of 'just doing it'. It's something that I've had to work at, to be somewhat functional in a work situation and I still struggle with from day to day.
 
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