People who are constantly late
- Thread starter MIMIC
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Am I too late for Shootember? I hope I didn't miss it.
No offence, but your inability to take responsibility for your actions is bizarre. I mean how do you think people get there early or on time?
If you know you forget things before leaving, get ready earlier so you can double check. You are not going to win any sympathy by pretending that late people are the real victims by people not understanding their plight. If you are serially late, it is literally not hard at all to fix the problem.
PdotMichael
Banned
Reminds me on the graffiti crowd.
Zen_Arcade
Banned
Yeah, God forbid someone calls you out on your flaws and expects you to better yourself so that your flaws don't negatively effect other people.
And as for that other post, you can surely turn off being a procrastinator. It's childish to think that you can't change something about yourself that is completely controlled by your own actions. You just don't care about other people in this situation, so much so that you think you're the victim because you're expected to be on time and not waste the time of others. Just because they're not calling you out on your behavior doesn't mean that they don't think it's shitty and disrespectful.
Getting up is hard. Some people can wake up easier than others. I'm someone that needs two alarm clocks, I need to put them away from my bed, then when I eventually wake up I'll find that the clocks were mysteriously knocked down off the table by a thrown shoe.
Oh man, funny thread. Hilarious the late apologists here as if it's something entirely out of their control.
People who are consistently late are astonishingly annoying. If you're an adult with the capability to tell the time, then the only reason you have for being late is if something entirely out if your control happens. Car breaks down. Road closed. That sort of thing. If your reasons for being late are 'it just keeps happening, I forget stuff, I'm a bad judge of time' then the problem is you and you have no excuse not to try and rectify it. Selfish not to frankly, if you know you have a continual problem with punctuality.
People who are consistently late are astonishingly annoying. If you're an adult with the capability to tell the time, then the only reason you have for being late is if something entirely out if your control happens. Car breaks down. Road closed. That sort of thing. If your reasons for being late are 'it just keeps happening, I forget stuff, I'm a bad judge of time' then the problem is you and you have no excuse not to try and rectify it. Selfish not to frankly, if you know you have a continual problem with punctuality.
The Albatross
Member
My mom and one of my sisters are always late. I think it's their subliminal way of exerting control over their environment.
I work at a company with many international offices, and the German office is always intensely frustrated with us Americans who to varrying degrees are always late for meetings.
Being consistently late for appointments and arrangements you've made with other people is an exercise in selfishness. Everybody can be late sometimes or something can come up, but if you're consistently late for things you arrange with people, it discounts other people's time in favor of whatever is making you consistently late.
I work at a company with many international offices, and the German office is always intensely frustrated with us Americans who to varrying degrees are always late for meetings.
Being consistently late for appointments and arrangements you've made with other people is an exercise in selfishness. Everybody can be late sometimes or something can come up, but if you're consistently late for things you arrange with people, it discounts other people's time in favor of whatever is making you consistently late.
Lolz, no its not. You might not feel properly awake or ready to start the day, but presumably you're physically capable of swinging your legs out of the duvet and making yourself get vertical. Voila, you're now up.
When your multiple alarm clocks go off, don't lob shoes at them. Do the above. Problem solved.
Billions of people get up every day.
cyberheater
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No it doesn't just happen. You are being are plain lazy and give no fucks.
Yes you are being disrespectful and are taking the piss.
Get off your lazy arse and make an effort. Some fucking people. My god.
Necromanti
Member
I don't think brains work that way, unfortunately, or chronic procrastination wouldn't exist.
they don't. They're that fucker who shows up late twice a week and everyone talks about them behind their back
People get fired real fast in my industry for that
Lawd. Here you are, consistently 10 minutes late for the movies. How on earth could you solve this dilly of a pickle? There isn't a way I guess, there is literally nothing you could do, like perhaps leaving 10 minutes earlier than you initially think you should, in order to arrive at your destination 10 minutes earlier. It just happens!
Seriously. The thought process should be "I'm off to the movies with Bill and his fat wife Wanda tonight, I'd best leave by 7pm latest. No wait, I'm always 10 minutes late. I'd better leave by 6.50pm instead. Hell you know what, I'll leave by 6.45pm instead"
Zen_Arcade
Banned
Yes they do. Otherwise people would never change any of their flaws. You can literally excuse any flaw by saying "Well sorry, my brain just doesn't work that way."
Chronic procrastination exists because the person who chronically procrastinates most likely doesn't care about the thing they need to do and does something to avoid it. It's an issue of weak will and avoidence of responsibility.
At the very worst a chronic procrastinator may have a disorder like ADD or something similar, which can be helped with medication.
cyberheater
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That's just a poor excuse. It's pure laziness and giving no fucks.
Clearly that's beyond the ability of this sentient being although he's more then capable of hitting keys on a keyboard in a coherent fashion. It's a mystery.
Necromanti
Member
That's what I was getting at, yes. In my case, at least, "will power" or "laziness" we're just bootstraps-esque terms that did nothing to actually help describe the situation or to find a solution to my problem. Only medication and therapy helped. Sometimes you can't simply "will" yourself into becoming a different person.
Some people have delayed circadian rhythms as well, so I don't truly believe anyone wants to be late or does it for the reasons people mention. I think it can inadequate sleep can contribute to not being able to get up in some situations, and some people might have issues with not being in denial about how long things actually take to do.
It sucks, but I don't think anyone truly wants to be late most of the time. And I don't think changing it is as simple as you think for those groups of people. Like people who are overweight or have some sort of addiction, I don't necessarily think it's a moral failing on their part, or if it is one, it is so in a minority of cases.
Late people bug me too, especially when they're invited over for lunch or dinner. We've gotten into the habit of telling my brother and his wife to show up 30-45 minutes before everyone else. Example, lunch really starts at 1pm, but you tell them to get there no later than 12:15-12:30. Even then they don't make it by 1, more like 1:10-1:15.
This is an incredibly dumb to say. "Lol, just get over your procrastination." Even though I don't want to be late, I'm glad that lateness upsets people that think like this, while decent understanding people don't care much.
Zen_Arcade
Banned
If you're constantly late to things or feel like you can't focus and that lack of focus effects other people, the onus is still on you to fix yourself. Not on the rest of the world to tolerate your behavior. If you have these issues and your response to other people calling you out on it isn't to reflect on your flaws and try to fix them then you're just perpetually going to be an inconsiderate person and you shouldn't expect other people to be sympathetic towards the way you act. Apparently you realized there was an issue and did something about it, which is all any one can ask of another person when dealing with their flaws.
Lothar however, is instead putting the blame on other people and not even bothering to reflect on his actions and how they effect other people. That just leads me to believe that he doesn't have some mental issue and is just selfish.
As for your overweight/addict comparison, it's not really apt to Lothar. A better example of that would be overweight people who claim that there is nothing physically wrong about being overweight and that people telling them that their unhealthy behavior can negatively effect those around them and themselves need to get over themselves and just let them be who they want to be.
The issue people have with late people isnt simply that they're late, it's that even when confronted with the issue of them being late they often try to deflect it and don't bother trying to change themselves to get rid of their bad habits.
I hate to break this to you but those "Decent understanding people" are most likely just too polite to call you out on your behavior. I can almost guarantee that at least a chunk of that time in between when you were supposed to be there and when you actually arrive is the people that are waiting on you discussing why the hell you're always late and how it's a dick move.
Go to a doctor is sonething as simple as being on time or getting your ass out of bed is too hard for you
Mr.Monitor
Member
I'm constantly late, and it's a huge source of anxiety for me. It's been a lifelong problem for me, as it's a symptom of my inattentive type ADHD. People have extremely low patience for it, even when I'm within a few minutes of being late, and it fucking sucks. Just look at some of the replies in here. I've been told my whole life that I'm inconsiderate, lazy, careless, and more because it's difficult for me to be on time. I try and explain that I prepare for these things in advance, I set tons of alarms, wake up hours early, but that isn't how shit works for me sometimes. Sometimes I end up going back and forth trying to remember what I need to do next, I obsess about being prepared, I walk around the house absentmindedly triple checking things, I'll get to my car and have to walk back because suddenly I think I forgot something important when I didn't forget it, or if I did I'll then think I'm forgetting something else and it'll lead me to pacing around trying to remember what it was, maybe I'll lose my train of thought and just stare at something for ten minutes, it sounds trivial but it's such a severe issue that it affects my ability to get along with others. Medication makes it better but a lot of this stuff has become a force of habit, since I'm constantly second guessing my shitty fucking memory.
Sparkedglory
Member
You guys defending being late are unbelievable. "Waking up is hard", "I'm consistently 10 mins late". All just excuses for you to justify your sorry asses for being late. It is not hard to wake up 10 mins earlier to be on time, it'a. It hard to just set an alarm at a decent enough time to be able to get ready for something sooner.
Can't even believe there's a defense force for this.
Can't even believe there's a defense force for this.
cyberheater
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Make and effort and decent people do care that folks are too lazy and unorganised to be bothered to turn up on time.
It's on you. Sort it out.
I probably should. I definitely should have back in college. I would turn all my assignments in late and start studying a hour before a test even when I stayed up all night for the purposes of studying. It's not something I wanted to happen.
I would not be hanging out with someone that would call procrastination a dick move. I wouldn't even want to interact with someone like that. I see that as the same as I would see "Why is this asshole depressed all the time?"
Zen_Arcade
Banned
Dude seriously, you should. If this is some kind of mental block you have then it's an issue that has a decent chance of being solved by some pretty common medication. Your overall life would be better for it.
Obviously I don't know you and it might take more than that, but if you can get this issue solved by a simple trip to the doctor, a few tests, and a prescription it would probably really improve multiple aspects in your life with very little risk or effort.
It's more like "Why is this asshole depressed all the time and never willing to do anything about it?" Nobody wants to hang out with someone who is a perpetual bummer that obviously has no inclination on trying to fix anything about themselves. Those types of people just turn into bitter hateful messes who do nothing but wallow in their own despair. I know people like that and I stopped making an effort to see them because all they ever did was bitch about how bad their life is. One of which has a substantially better life than I have right now. And when I tried to give them advice or help them it went in one ear and out the other and the next time I hung out with them was just them venting the same exact problems that I tried to help them with last time.
Nobody thinks someone is an asshole for having flaws, everyone has flaws. But tons of people will think you're an asshole when they see that you know that you have flaws and don't make any effort in making those flaws go away. Mainly because when most people figure out that they have a flaw, they try to do their best to improve themselves.
OrbitalBeard
Member
Oh, that's totally fine, because in real life, our relationship would end pretty quickly. Unreliable people aren't worth dealing with.
I'm a horrible procrastinator. Yet I'm almost always on time or early when I meet someone. Because we made plans and I respect their time.
Most people in this thread don't mind if someone is occasionally late. Shit happens. It's when someone is consistently late (and late by a significant time) that's annoying.
CosmicQueso
Member
Being on time shows you respect and care about the people you're planning on meeting. Being late show an inherent disrespect for those people. If you care, show up on time.
You've missed out on some of the defense forces lately if you think this is a bad one.
You've missed out on some of the defense forces lately if you think this is a bad one.
Unknown Soldier
Member
You're late. Why are you always late?
Sparkedglory
Member
Oh no. I've seen quite a few and I'm well aware of gaf's defense force for everything. This one just kinda sticks out as extra stuff for me. Even considering how dumb some of the others are.
i work at a movie theatre and a 7 listed start time means the movies gonna start at 7:23 or some bullshit because of previews haha
Kuro Madoushi
Unconfirmed Member
Late people to me are pretty disrespectful of your time. You've both agreed to meet at a certain place and time and if I'm there on time, I'm waiting for you to arrive. If it's something beyond your control like the subway broke down then that's definitely acceptable. Chronically late people though are a pet peeve of mine, at the very least call and let them know out of courtesy if you're going to be late.
Late people are eternally optimistic. Whenever im late somewhere, its because i thought i could get way more done than i thought i could.
Holyoneturtle
Member
Welcome to miami where everyone is late and it is actually the norm. Btw I'm one of those people.
Stallion Dan
Member
I'm never late, I just tell people the wrong time.
Imperial Bishop
Banned
My mom has been like this for as long as I can remember.
It's gotten to the point where my family gives her a different time (usually an hour early) for the start of any party/event/gathering.
It's gotten to the point where my family gives her a different time (usually an hour early) for the start of any party/event/gathering.
BattleMonkey
Member
Im very punctual and all about planning, so late people bother me. The wife is the same, and we've backed away from hanging out with some friends who consistently would be 30min to an hour late to anything we ever tried to do. For like a party, it's fine, folks tend to come and go, but for a specific event or a schedule, being late just screws things over. Life gets in the way sure, but when it happens every time, it's a personal problem.
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
Go to sleep earlier. Not that hard.
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
Sounds like you need to make checklists. There are probably apps to help out with that too.
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