Wow, this is really cool. What did you use to make this? It looks like it's for visual novels?
Some quick feedback, though:
[1] That typing noise got a little old after a while. Is there any way to remove it?
[2] Maybe it's the internal editor in me, but I was kind of distracted by the typos and one grammar error I saw. It's not world-ending or anything, but it would be nice if the text was cleaner next time.
[3]I think the transition cards could be reworked a little. The text itself is a little too small, so, assuming you can edit it manually, I'd suggest making the text a bit bigger and switching it to a simple serif typeface, like Garamond or even Georgia. Also, the police tape could be removed to make things a little less cluttered.
[4]The time indicator is a little too big, on top of being a bit confusing. It seemed like you were using it to help the audience get its bearings, but it only popped up for one scene, only to disappear for the next one.
[5]I might be opening a Pandora's box of insanity with this, but it might be cool, provided you can do this, if you could get folks from here to provide voice acting. The most recent episode of S.Link showed that there are a lot of talented people here, but it also showed how crazy that can get. That would obviously introduce some delays, though, so I don't know if you would want to go with it.
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Other than that, though, I'll be interested in seeing the next one.