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[Imperfected]

I went completely blind on Dark Souls 3 and I still managed to find that wall just fine.


31. crab battle

You're right, I completely forgot that one. I bet he gets crossified at least once while distracted by a mushroom, too.

Even odds on whether or not he gets gangbanged on Goobro's Porch. I'm not sure if they're going to have a policy on handling online ("Fuck that shit!") by that point.

 

[Xux]

PAT YOU FUCKIN' SHIT

ALREADY OVERLEVELING TO SHIT OFF SCREEN

I like how he turns to Woolie and Matt at the end of Part 6 and is just like, "You mind if I ruin the LP?" And they're just kinda dumbstruck.

It's fine, he's still going to get completely destroyed by:

1. Sheer drops..
2. Swordpope.
3. Gatordawgs.
4. Trustworthiness/Unbreakableness.
5. Roaming packs of FUCKING WHORES in New Montreal, Lothric.
6. Roaming packs of FUCKING WHORES in Secret Reptile Temple.
7. Ballistae.
8. Teenage Mutant Ninja Spinal.
9. Dracolord Voldemort.
10. Bran and Hodor.
11. The Birdemic.
12. I don't even have a joke for those big beast-looking cunts with the trees, just fuck them.
13. Mimics. (Does he seriously not know how to tell them apart...?)
14. MMA Champ Gunny.
15. WAY TOO MANY SKELINGTONS.
16. Lava.
17. Standing in wyvern's breath.
18. Trying and failing to jump onto a giant monster's head.
19. Leeches.
20. I seriously don't even know what those bitey things that curse you are, but at least once to them, for sure.
21. Hamburger Helpers.
22. Rooftop Sniper REMIIIIIIIIX (x2).
23. Lack of wax.
24. Rats. (Yes, really.)
25. Greirats. (Yes, definitely.)
26. New Londo's Finest.
27. Bloodborne Cosplayers.
28. Fumelord Trollchamp.
29. The Black Knight's Gift.
30. At least one vastly underleveled and seemingly harmless Hollow flailing around like he's covered in spiders and the spiders are also on fire, because there's no Poise so this is now the most goddamn dangerous thing in the entire universe.

3 and 20 I haven't legit beaten yet; I'll never be a Faithful.

 

[Imperfected]

I like how he turns to Woolie and Matt at the end of Part 6 and is just like, "You mind if I ruin the LP?" And they're just kinda dumbstruck.
3 and 20 I haven't legit beaten yet; I'll never be a Faithful.

The secret to #3 is to stop trying to git gud. Their hitboxes are fucking horseshit terrible to the extreme and any attempt to fight them like a man will be punished. Your belief that there is a way to "learn" and "improve" so you can fight them like a man is your undoing; there is no escape from their ability to hit everything in a 500 yard radius (including things that are on the back of their head) with a bite attack.

Turtle up behind a shield or just run around trying to bait their breath attack for cheap hits. There are no real men in New Montreal, Lothric; the gatordawgs have eaten them.

The creepy bitey cursey things are more manageable.

 

[kewlmyc]

I went completely blind on Dark Souls 3 and I still managed to find that wall just fine.


31. crab battle

Man, fuck those crabs. They're easy to fight, it just takes forever and having another show up in the middle of fighting one is bullshit.

Also, watching this playthrough made me realize I totally skipped an area. I ignored the whole Siegward bit and just went down the elevator. Totally silly of me now that I think about it.

 

[Imperfected]

Man, fuck those crabs. They're easy to fight, it just takes forever and having another show up in the middle of fighting one is bullshit.

Also, watching this playthrough made me realize I totally skipped an area. I ignored the whole Siegward bit and just went down the elevator. Totally silly of me now that I think about it.

The thing that got me was their submerge deal they do.

I thought it was charging some kind of crab laser and backed off... ._.

 

[Skrams]

The thing that got me was their submerge deal they do.

I thought it was charging some kind of crab laser and backed off... ._.

It's even funnerer to know that it just regained all its health. I was fighting the first one near crossmens and backed off for a little slack. Oh, look, it can't get to me. Oh, look, it's gone. Oh, look, all health restored. It's worse when that just happened on accident the second time since I was trying to just play keep away well. Then the third time both crabs leashed. Then the fourth time I put a gun in my mouth.

 

[Glitchesarecool]

What should I do to not get completely fucked playing Dark Souls 1 for the first time? Any helpful, spoiler free tips and tricks kind of thing to read?

 

[NCR Redslayer]

What should I do to not get completely fucked playing Dark Souls 1 for the first time? Any helpful, spoiler free tips and tricks kind of thing to read?

Play demon souls.

 

[Chinese Cartoons]

Could pat level some more off screen to like i dunno lvl 200 I love watching people play souls game like this it's amazing.

Spoiler

Not even DSPgaming did this

 

[Strimei]

What should I do to not get completely fucked playing Dark Souls 1 for the first time? Any helpful, spoiler free tips and tricks kind of thing to read?

The graveyard near Firelink is quite dangerous, but the skeletons can be a good thing to practice parrying on, if you get them one-on-one. At the least, its a good starting point.

But do NOT go down the stairs. I mean you can, but that's probably better for when you're stronger.

Keep your equip load under...60% I think? For a decent rollspeed. (edit: might be 70% in DaS1 too)

 

[Chinese Cartoons]

What should I do to not get completely fucked playing Dark Souls 1 for the first time? Any helpful, spoiler free tips and tricks kind of thing to read?

Farm loads of levels and put all your levels into vit.

 

[Imperfected]

What should I do to not get completely fucked playing Dark Souls 1 for the first time? Any helpful, spoiler free tips and tricks kind of thing to read?

visions of gitting gud...

I would say for a first-timer: you get a shield early, learn to love it and hide behind it. You can learn to dodge properly as you get used to enemies and their attacks, but early on just running around with your face hidden behind a shield makes life enormously more bearable.

Imagine yourself as being in The Edge of Tomorrow. That is, when you die, ask, "What can I do differently this time to not die?" There's no always a good answer, and sometimes the apparent answer ("I'm going to go stab that archer in the dick!") is a trap in and of itself, but this is kind of the core conceit of the games.

To start out with, try to get into a simple rhythm: shield an attack from an enemy, then hit them once. As you get more comfortable with it try and get more hits in. You can get pretty far with just a basic "stand and deliver" sword-and-board fighting style.

 

[Matsukaze]

What should I do to not get completely fucked playing Dark Souls 1 for the first time? Any helpful, spoiler free tips and tricks kind of thing to read?

I'm not sure if you've played any Souls games before, so these tips might be old news, but:

. Rolling is typically more advantageous than blocking. At the beginning, it's easier to get blocking down than rolling, but learn to roll properly unless you are adamant you want to wear heavy armor and wield heavy weapons. If you mistime a roll, you can get yourself squashed, but once you learn to read attacks, you'll probably feel a lot more comfortable than turtling behind a shield. The added maneuverability is pretty nice.

. Locking onto targets is important, because free-swinging can easily throw you off-balance and make you vulnerable.

. Don't fish for backstabs if you don't know an enemy's attacks and movement speed. Backstabs are always nice, but don't be Pat. Read a situation (and keep an eye out for additional enemies) before juking and circling around.

 

[Anung]

Just back from seeing Civil War and now I'm wired and can't sleep. That was a god damn killer movie.

 

[Glitchesarecool]

Only Souls game I've played is Bloodborne and I know the things are preeeeetty different.

 

[Menitta]

Only Souls game I've played is Bloodborne and I know the things are preeeeetty different.

Same. DS3 is much slower. I like it though. It's different. I don't want to not finish it like I didn't finish DS1.

 

[RecursiveFault]

What should I do to not get completely fucked playing Dark Souls 1 for the first time? Any helpful, spoiler free tips and tricks kind of thing to read?

Nothing particularly crazy about it if you played BB.

Keep your equipload under 25% for fast rolls with the most iframes. Endurance levels your equipload and stamina bar so it's real good. Levels are strong, 100% block shields are strong.

Spoiler

Don't get cursed.

The rest is pretty much the same basic deal as BB.

Same. DS3 is much slower. I like it though. It's different. I don't want to not finish it like I didn't finish DS1.

DS1's second "quest" after O&S is pretty bad, and outside of the Manus and Artorias bossfights, the DLC area is ass too.

I personally really love the last boss of DS1 though.

The secret to #3 is to stop trying to git gud. Their hitboxes are fucking horseshit terrible to the extreme and any attempt to fight them like a man will be punished. Your belief that there is a way to "learn" and "improve" so you can fight them like a man is your undoing; there is no escape from their ability to hit everything in a 500 yard radius (including things that are on the back of their head) with a bite attack.

Turtle up behind a shield or just run around trying to bait their breath attack for cheap hits. There are no real men in New Montreal, Lothric; the gatordawgs have eaten them.

The creepy bitey cursey things are more manageable.

Oh, but... you just roll, though, Like that's it. You roll through the attacks.

Do enough damage to their face and you can even get the visceral for MASSIVE DAMAGE.

 

[sjay1994]

It's fine, he's still going to get completely destroyed by:

1. Sheer drops..
2. Swordpope.
3. Gatordawgs.
4. Trustworthiness/Unbreakableness.
5. Roaming packs of FUCKING WHORES in New Montreal, Lothric.
6. Roaming packs of FUCKING WHORES in Secret Reptile Temple.
7. Ballistae.
8. Teenage Mutant Ninja Spinal.
9. Dracolord Voldemort.
10. Bran and Hodor.
11. The Birdemic.
12. I don't even have a joke for those big beast-looking cunts with the trees, just fuck them.
13. Mimics. (Does he seriously not know how to tell them apart...?)
14. MMA Champ Gunny.
15. WAY TOO MANY SKELINGTONS.
16. Lava.
17. Standing in wyvern's breath.
18. Trying and failing to jump onto a giant monster's head.
19. Leeches.
20. I seriously don't even know what those bitey things that curse you are, but at least once to them, for sure.
21. Hamburger Helpers.
22. Rooftop Sniper REMIIIIIIIIX (x2).
23. Lack of wax.
24. Rats. (Yes, really.)
25. Greirats. (Yes, definitely.)
26. New Londo's Finest.
27. Bloodborne Cosplayers.
28. Fumelord Trollchamp.
29. The Black Knight's Gift.
30. At least one vastly underleveled and seemingly harmless Hollow flailing around like he's covered in spiders and the spiders are also on fire, because there's no Poise so this is now the most goddamn dangerous thing in the entire universe.

Bran and Hodor fucked me quite a bit

 

[Imperfected]

Oh, but... you just roll, though, Like that's it. You roll through the attacks.

Do enough damage to their face and you can even get the visceral for MASSIVE DAMAGE.

Nah. You roll, you risk getting too close to them/inside them/behind them where everything they do hits you, and then you basically get to be at the mercy of them just deciding to stop spamming attacks eventually since they aren't programmed with any significant recovery on their primary string and can launch out of it directly right back into it.

Like, you can do it, but it's an entirely shitty way of fighting them compared to keeping waaaay out in front of them and just laming it out, where all you have to worry about is their admittedly also completely moronic charging grab attack.

I say this as someone who never once raised a shield during my NG playthrough: just put a fucking shield between you and them and they become almost trivial, whereas trying to play dodgeball with them is just needlessly frustrating due to them having the actual worst hitboxes in all of Souls. They're hot fucking garbage, and whoever ripped off the Watchdog of the Old Lords making them should feel the deepest shame for the shit job he did.

 

[mike0dude]

I'm not sorry.

 

[Chaos2Frozen]

Have they mentioned anything about a video on the Nioh Demo?

I imagine Liam would probably be more suited at the helm due to it's difficulty with Pat complaining about every not Dark Souls about it XD

 

[Skrams]

I'm not sorry.

When you get comments like this I instantly check the vessel videos for the upload schedule.

Jesus Christ, you're the worst.

 

[Glitchesarecool]

I'm not sorry.

HE'S THE FIFTH MEMBER, OF THE BEST FRIENDS CREW.

 

[MrHoot]

HE'S THE FIFTH MEMBER, OF THE BEST FRIENDS CREW.

Which one would be the one with no style and no grace and the funny face ?

I'd say Pat. Although he can't handstand when he needs to (unless PeachSaliva is hiding something from everyone)

 

[GlassEmpires]

Have they mentioned anything about a video on the Nioh Demo?

I imagine Liam would probably be more suited at the helm due to it's difficulty with Pat complaining about every not Dark Souls about it XD

I would love a full LP on the Nioh demo. The second area is pretty small, but it's got some cool stuff.

 

[How About No]

Punisher series coming to Netflix

 

[MillionStabs]

Punisher series coming to Netflix

Can't come soon enough.

That teaser image looks different from the one in Daredevil S2, oddly enough.

 

[mike0dude]

When you get comments like this I instantly check the vessel videos for the upload schedule.

Jesus Christ, you're the worst.

You can't stop it skrams it's eternal.

HE'S THE FIFTH MEMBER, OF THE BEST FRIENDS CREW.

Nah.

 

[Nazo]

Just saw the ending to part 12 of the Punisher LP and that has to be one of the best edits they've ever done. I was in stitches.

 

[Disgraced]

Just saw the ending to part 12 of the Punisher LP and that has to be one of the best edits they've ever done. I was in stitches.

The Punisher LP is fan-fucking-tastic. I wish they were all like it. I think I'm going to drop Souls 3 for now. The energy is good but personally that's just not enough to motivate me to sit through such lengthy, raw footage.

 

[KRaZyAmmo]

Salty Bet 4

 

[kewlmyc]

Just saw the ending to part 12 of the Punisher LP and that has to be one of the best edits they've ever done. I was in stitches.

Heh, I just noticed the vessel and youtube version of Punisher 12 end on different notes.

 

[Menitta]

YEAH PLACE YOUR BETS!!!

BETTING TIME IS NOW OVER!!!

Edit: Man people are really upset that they aren't playing BlazBlue in the comments. Why this video in particular?

Cool. I got an indirect shout-out.

 

[TC McQueen]

Edit: Man people are really upset that they aren't playing BlazBlue in the comments. Why this video in particular?

Maybe someone on Twitter implied tonight would be BlazBlue.

 

[Menitta]

Maybe someone on Twitter implied tonight would be BlazBlue.

Nah, they didn't say anything like that.

Same with Dark Souls! Why would people expect Dark Souls on FRIDAY NIGHT?!

 

[Glitchesarecool]

I always love that they didn't do a new intro for Saltybet. Just make fake dollars rain down to one of the best tunes out of Sonic.

 

[Xux]

I wonder how the people on the Youtube commenter level will react to

Spoiler

day of Woolie.

 

[Menitta]

I honestly don't get why people thought there'd be Dark Souls tonight. They've been doing this every week for over 2 years.

 

[Glitchesarecool]

I honestly don't get why people thought there'd be Dark Souls tonight. They've been doing this every week for over 2 years.

I believe because Pat said something along the lines of "We'll be doing it every day until it's over" and of course, people take things to be absolutes. It's best to just stay out of the youtube comments.

 

[Strimei]

Edit: Man people are really upset that they aren't playing BlazBlue in the comments. Why this video in particular?

Could be the Salty Bet logo thing on the thumbnail? I confess, when I first saw it (without reading the title) I thought Blazblue, too.

 

[KRaZyAmmo]

Could be the Salty Bet logo thing on the thumbnail? I confess, when I first saw it (without reading the title) I thought Blazblue, too.

I think they made the Salty Bet logo intentionally like that just like how they did the Blazblue video lol

 

[Menitta]

I think they made the Salty Bet logo intentionally like that just like how they did the Blazblue video lol

Someone on the subreddit made it with the thought of it becoming a series. Woolie just replied with "right-click, save as"

 

[NCR Redslayer]

Someone on the subreddit made it with the thought of it becoming a series. Woolie just replied with "right-click, save as"

Woolie the thief strikes again.

 

[Numb]

Godzilla tower too OP pls nerf next patch

 

[Moonlight]

Saltybet is way more fun than it would be to watch them try to play BlazBlue tbh.

 

[Xux]

Spoiler

Enter the Gungeon

looks pretty neat. I think I've literally never played a

Spoiler

bullet hell

game and I still have no clue what a

Spoiler

rogue-like

is but I might have to see if I have

Spoiler

HDD space

on my PS4.

 

[Menitta]

I think the Blazblue video would be a waste. None of them like it and they'd just shit on it the entire video. I'd be fine if they never played it.

 

[Zocano]

I believe because Pat said something along the lines of "We'll be doing it every day until it's over" and of course, people take things to be absolutes. It's best to just stay out of the youtube comments.

Nah he said Dark Souls 3 would be 5 times a week without fail until it's over. People just were dumb and couldn't read correctly.

 

[Imperfected]

I honestly don't get why people thought there'd be Dark Souls tonight. They've been doing this every week for over 2 years.

I want it to be real so I believe it, like one of Woolie's ninja.

I really liked that none of them seem to realize what kind of site Aeris dies dot com is, but I can't believe Liam called Red "that tiger". Damn kids and their FF13's.

 

[GlassEmpires]

Spoiler

Enter the Gungeon

looks pretty neat. I think I've literally never played a

Spoiler

bullet hell

game and I still have no clue what a

Spoiler

rogue-like

is but I might have to see if I have

Spoiler

HDD space

on my PS4.

Check out Risk of Rain when it releases on the PS4 for the vertical version if you end up liking it

I want it to be real so I believe it, like one of Woolie's ninja.

I really liked that none of them seem to realize what kind of site Aeris dies dot com is, but I can't believe Liam called Red "that tiger". Damn kids and their FF13's.