Meh. I'd rather be considered an arsehole or a dickhead than walk around on eggshells wondering whether someone's fragile sense of self will become shattered because I criticised the choice of entertainment media.
Why should you get defensive because you like something someone else considers shit? It should add more discussion on why a piece of work can still be enjoyed regardless of some of the elements it it pandering to undesirable subcultures. For example one could say Shirobako is 'Typical moeshit slice-of life only enjoyable by socially underdeveloped losers'. And the response could be to curl up into a ball and cry about how people are dickheads on the internet. Or it could be to launch a discussion about how the shows content is betrayed by it's visuals, how it gives a good look into Japanese work culture and the various hurdles around animation creation in Japan, and also linking this into cultural discussions about Japan's obsession with female youthfulness. You could go into fiscal discussions about how hard it is to launch an animation and how many studios are running after a small pot of dedicated buyers and therefore are somewhat forced to use visual designs and characterisations which are unthreatening to that audience. Instead of pretending everything is fine and dandy, that underage sibling incest subplots have merit, that harems and falling onto girls breasts are aimed at adults, that skimpy 'armour' that somehow manages to expose more flesh than it covers exists for some other reason than base titilation, why not disown the elements you hate whilst encouraging discussion about the stuff you enjoy? You're favourite anime IS shit, but that doesn't stop you from explaining what it does that you liked.
We're not talking about someone criticizing a work but how they criticize it. By saying shit like "Typical moeshit slice-of life only enjoyable by socially underdeveloped losers", what does that add to the discussion? You're certainly not going to convince anyone you're right with that particular tone and the people who do like the show are just going to be pissed off. Now if you want to express your issues with the show then you should be capable of writing down those thoughts in a somewhat coherent and thoughtful manner instead of a post I could find on 4chan. I doubt anyone is saying that works shouldn't be criticized or harshly for what they bring to the table or the effect they could have socially but posts like that aren't even to the level of constructive criticism but rather someone just venting or ranting.
Many elements of harems are definitely designed towards attracting to the base elements of otaku and I don't think anyone is disagreeing that a reviewer should ignore or gloss over that. In fact I imagine most viewers are aware of that when they watch as the target audience for any of these works are old enough to generally know what's going on. Lord knows enough fanservice shows fail every year so it's not just a simple 'show tits and clear 3k in sales' card. However boiling down complex issues into the form of a soundbite doesn't serve to nurture discussion.
I think the difference is that I don't fault people for looking down on anime at all. Why shouldn't they? I seriously cannot see myself taking an insult based on entertainment preferences personally unless I secretly knew them to be true. I know that someone can look at Shirobako or Madoka and turn to the worst conclusion, and I don't blame them. The anime industry has continuously pushed itself into this corner and those of us who partake of it must know what we are doing.
You really pick Shirobako and Madoka as the worst of the industry? Really?