The Chipotle Story
Yesterday I was in line at Chipotle. It was packed. IJust behind me were two young ladies who seemed about 19 years old. I stood in line for like 10 minutes as they strung together who did and who didn't catch VD because of a recent highschool outbreak. My internal reactions will be coli smileys:
Girl1: "I don't know who it started with but female1 has it and she fucks with dude1 and dude1 fucks anyone who is willing." I try to keep a straightface but internally I'm like
Girl2: "Yea he fucked female2 and she hooks up with dude2 on the low"
Girl1:"WHAT! Since when?"
Girl2:"Since last year. Always after school, she's just an after-school."
@ calling some girl an "after-school"
Girl2:"Female4 was messing around with dude4 in a hot tub, if she was flaring up he might have it too."
Girl1:"That makes sense but dude4 was making out with female3 I heard. I told female3 to go get tested but she said, "Nah I'm good, I'm not itching or burning so I'm not getting tested.'"
Girl2:"But she works and she doesn't have insurance."
Girl1: "So she can just go to planned parenthood."
Girl2: "What exactly does planned parenthood do?"
Girl1: "Basically everything except delive the baby"
Girl1: "That's where I got my abortion."
Girl2:" Really, how much did it cost?"
Girl1: "I went to my doctor and they said they don't perform them there so they referred me to planned parenthood. When I first starting feeling morning sickness I went to the 99 cent store to get pregnancy tests."
Girl1: "they all came back positive and I was like, "nooo my mama's gonna kill me!" but I went to planned parenthood and it was just a 15 dollar co-pay."
Girl2: "What's the latest they can give you one?"
Girl1: "6 months. If it's early you get a pill, the longer you wait the more it hurts."
Girl2: "6 MONTHS?!"
Girl1: "I meant weeks."
*Girl1's phone rings*
Girl1: " Hey!......just in this LONG-ASS LINE AT CHOPTLE!"
End Scene.
I ordered my food, left and felt like