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[JimmyRustler]

This.
I'd expect most 18-25 year olds would not want to be married and not have children at that age. Even 30 and up would offer more devastating results than this.

The question here is why though. Is it because it's a bad choice at this point in life or because it's so frowned upon by media? Over the years I fond it very interesting when talking to women that they tend to REALLY like children in their late teens and then less so when they pass 20. I wonder... One could almost think that this is due to constant media brain washing.

 

[bitbydeath]

The question here is why though. Is it because it's a bad choice at this point in life or because it's so frowned upon by media? Over the years I fond it very interesting when talking to women that they tend to REALLY like children in their late teens and then less so when they pass 20. I wonder... One could almost think that this is due to constant media brain washing.

Having kids is life changing, you'd miss out on too much fun/living by having them so soon. Say goodbye to parties, flings, extensive holidays, practically your entire social life.

Everything is harder with kids, and not worth jumping into straight out of school.

 

[Bojji]

Wasnt that long ago that those were not guarantees. I think we should not take those benefits for granted instead of worrying about whos sleeping with who. Because also, there's always been gay people. A whole friggin lot of em.l and all parts of other fetishises, In positions of power too. They just didn't call it that.

Its foundation like your daughter has friends. Thats more than many you people or even older people can say these days. Thats worth something.

Of course there were always gay people but this is not possible to be natural:

Young minds are easy to manipulate. Some young people THINK that they are X, Y, Z - not just plain, old, boring hetero.

Children should be free of this indoctrination - both from religion and LGBT cult. But with social media so easily available and how much this cancer had spread in institutions, I doubt this is possible.

 

[JimmyRustler]

Having kids is life changing, you'd miss out on too much fun/living by having them so soon. Say goodbye to parties, flings, extensive holidays, practically your entire social life.

Everything is harder with kids, and not worth jumping into straight out of school.

What a stupid argument. It's exactly the reason why so many people are miserable today. Yes, you miss out on parties. So what? Is this what life is all about? How about you miss out on time with your grandchildren if you wait too long? Also, it no secret that it's much easier to pull all nighters or play around with children when you are younger. So by waiting longer you just make child rearing more difficult for yourself. So... what's it gonna be? Seems like people doing the waiting game isn't working out so well, is it?

I really don't get the focus on "having fun" or "enjoying life" before you get kids. It's all social media brain wash to make you spend money on shit you don't need instead of building a good family (which you do need). We really need to start reframing those statements away from that having kids is the "end of the good life" or something.

Also, living the easy life doesn't change anything. You'll still get older and you still won't like it.

 

[bitbydeath]

What a stupid argument. It's exactly the reason why so many people are miserable today. Yes, you miss out on parties. So what? Is this what life is all about? How about you miss out on time with your grandchildren if you wait too long? Also, it no secret that it's much easier to pull all nighters or play around with children when you are younger. So by waiting longer you just make child rearing more difficult for yourself. So... what's it gonna be? Seems like people doing the waiting game isn't working out so well, is it?

I really don't get the focus on "having fun" or "enjoying life" before you get kids. It's all social media brain wash to make you spend money on shit you don't need instead of building a good family (which you do need). We really need to start reframing those statements away from that having kids is the "end of the good life" or something.

Also, living the easy life doesn't change anything. You'll still get older and you still won't like it.

I don't agree, but each to their own.

 

[GymWolf]

Is it the same for married men tho?

Wasn't a recent article saying that men gay couple are the happiest of the bunch?

 

[nkill20]

Not true. A lot of the feminist movement is looking down on married women, or lambasting that type of lifestyle. Some of the most prominent feminists have argued that women should not be given a choice at all.

Simone de Beauvoir was a feminist in the 40s - 70s, largely credited for feminist theory and the rise of the second wave of the feminist movement. As she once said in a published interview: "No woman should be authorized to stay at home to raise her children. Women should not have that choice, precisely because if there is such a choice, too many women will make that one." She was also quite negative in her opinion of marriage, not just for the mother and father but children.

Only because Sartre never married her.

 

[Signalis]

"Oooooopsie, we only ruined society and hundreds of millions of people's happiness"

The Marriage Effect

A common narrative has it that commitment and motherhood make women unhappy. New data suggest the opposite is true.

www.theatlantic.com

Even publications like The Atlantic are starting to admit it now that feminism, satellite ideologies and their messaging have been a disaster for the human race. And don't even get me started on how damaging for gender relations it has been with all these lonely, bitter women and men hating each other and blaming the other gender for their unhappiness. The experiment has failed leaving behind a broken, angry society

Good post! Thanks for sharing, found it very informative and sad at the same time(how the family unit is under attack for a long time now. But now there is proof that a married woman is a happy woman)

 

[Signalis]

Is it the same for married men tho?

Wasn't a recent article saying that men gay couple are the happiest of the bunch?

And lesbian couples have the highest rate of domestic violence between each other

 

[Toons]

Of course they were always gay people but this is not possible to be natural:

Young minds are easy to manipulate. Some young people THINK that they are X, Y, Z - not just plain, old, boring hetero.

Children should be free of this indoctrination - both from religion and LGBT cult. But with social media so easily available and how much this cancer had spread in institutions, I doubt this is possible.

Ok but you can't just look at a stastistic and just reject it as unnatural because you don't like it. That... is really not how this works.

The statistics is how people are self identifying. And yes; that plays a large role on a societal level, how people self identify and that doesn't stop with sexuality.

No ones telling kids they have to he gau or straight. If a kid has gay friends and wants to fit in so says they're gay, that probably happens a lot. But in the end they're gonna go to wherever their heart takes them. Theres many a case of gay people trying to say they were straight growing up only to find if wasn't their thing.

This is a thing that works itself out on an individual level. No ones going to be living their whole life as a gay person while secretly repressing their straightness. Thats never gonna be a thing. Either they try it out and actually find they don't mind it or they end up just going straight in the end. Many youth experiment with such feelings growing up and end up in traditional marriages or whatnot.

 

[Bojji]

Ok but you can't just look at a stastistic and just reject it as unnatural because you don't like it. That... is really not how this works.

The statistics is how people are self identifying. And yes; that plays a large role on a societal level, how people self identify and that doesn't stop with sexuality.

No ones telling kids they have to he gau or straight. If a kid has gay friends and wants to fit in so says they're gay, that probably happens a lot. But in the end they're gonna go to wherever their heart takes them. Theres many a case of gay people trying to say they were straight growing up only to find if wasn't their thing.

This is a thing that works itself out on an individual level. No ones going to be living their whole life as a gay person while secretly repressing their straightness. Thats never gonna be a thing. Either they try it out and actually find they don't mind it or they end up just going straight in the end. Many youth experiment with such feelings growing up and end up in traditional marriages or whatnot.

This is effect of 30+ years of LGBT mafia propaganda. I doubt real number of gay people changed, now we also have "queer", "pansexual", "they, them" and other bullshit added.

 

[GymWolf]

And lesbian couples have the highest rate of domestic violence between each other

I guess they fight to decide who is the woman in a umm...woman to woman relation...

 

[Aesius]

What a stupid argument. It's exactly the reason why so many people are miserable today. Yes, you miss out on parties. So what? Is this what life is all about? How about you miss out on time with your grandchildren if you wait too long? Also, it no secret that it's much easier to pull all nighters or play around with children when you are younger. So by waiting longer you just make child rearing more difficult for yourself. So... what's it gonna be? Seems like people doing the waiting game isn't working out so well, is it?

I really don't get the focus on "having fun" or "enjoying life" before you get kids. It's all social media brain wash to make you spend money on shit you don't need instead of building a good family (which you do need). We really need to start reframing those statements away from that having kids is the "end of the good life" or something.

Also, living the easy life doesn't change anything. You'll still get older and you still won't like it.

I don't think having kids in your early to mid 30s instead of 20 dramatically alters your life or their lives for the worse. It was different when women regularly birthed 6+ kids in their lifetimes and some of them died in infancy or childhood. You basically had to start early because you needed help tending to your land and household as soon as possible.

I had my first at 33 and second at 35. I'm a much better parent now than I would have been at 20. I have a much better wife than I would have had at 20 had I married my high school/early college girlfriend. We have more education and better careers and can provide a better future for them. And no, we aren't too decrepit to get down on the floor and play with them, nor did pulling all-nighters with them when they were babies go beyond our geriatric capabilities.

For someone who feels so strongly about this: I assume you had children in your early 20s? Teens even? Would love to know your exact situation.

 

[StreetsofBeige]

I don't think having kids in your early to mid 30s instead of 20 dramatically alters your life or their lives for the worse. It was different when women regularly birthed 6+ kids in their lifetimes and some of them died in infancy or childhood. You basically had to start early because you needed help tending to your land and household as soon as possible.

I had my first at 33 and second at 35. I'm a much better parent now than I would have been at 20. I have a much better wife than I would have had at 20 had I married my high school/early college girlfriend. We have more education and better careers and can provide a better future for them. And no, we aren't too decrepit to get down on the floor and play with them, nor did pulling all-nighters with them when they were babies go beyond our geriatric capabilities.

For someone who feels so strongly about this: I assume you had children in your early 20s? Teens even? Would love to know your exact situation.

I know people who had kids in their 40s. The parents and kids seem fine to me.

If anything it's probably better since at that stage, both the wife and hubby are established with good jobs. So when one goes on mat leave, it doesnt seem to move the needle since they got money and a same/similar job to go back to as per maternity laws. At that point, I know some of the wives who didnt even bother going back to work and became stay at home moms now. That's because they built up their careers to such a good spot, they decided she doesn't have to go back and grind out a pay stub anymore. The guy will carry the earnings going forward. No panicking over daycare, no begging grandparents to babysit. Simple. One parent stays home and covers it all, while the other works. All due to waiting until they were established and can do it all themselves.

Having kids in their 20s now seems like a strain unless both parents are already doing great with a stable homelife and can pay the bills no problems.

I know someone at work with 4 kids. And she had them all I'd ballpark by around 35 years old. They both make ok money combined. But not exactly raking it in. Well, no wonder youre broke all the time, complaining about babysitting issues and got to leave work early half an hour every day to pick up kids and drive them to activities. You got too many kids and can barely handle them - and there's two of you. One person I know was in such a tight spot (and this was before Uber), that she asked me if I could help pick up her kids after work for her. And it wasnt even on the way home. I had to out of my way. It was just a one off situation, so not a big deal and I know her decently well. But geez people, take care of your own kids.

 

[GymWolf]

Geez why people want to enjoy their life when they are young and full of energy and keep child breeding for when they are older and wiser.

If this was sophie's choice the movie would have ended after 5 min.

 

[12Goblins]

I remember a decade or so on GAF, probably early 10s or so when this was in it's infancy that a poster had made a thread of a study that marriages made people miserable and how people were happier being either by themselves or in open relationships. This was followed up with post after post of GAFfers that "agreed" with that calling marriange outdated and generally mocking things that were traditional.

Now I look back and that and more than wonder if that article was done by design to get people to think about it or set in stone those whose thoughts were already on that track.

I mean, people are always trying to validate their own worldviews, which is no different than what people are doing in this thread.

No liberals think that women will be happier if they are career oriented, single, childless or whatever--They are just pushing back on the social pressures that ALL women have to face at one point in their lives that they they should get married, have kids, take care of the home. It's true most women are biologically predisposed to find this lifestyle fulfilling, but it's not fair to push this on women that don't

For liberals it's really about choice; a woman should have the freedom to choose if they want to focus on their career, if they want be polyamorous, be a housewife, whatever. Doesn't matter what their choices are, but they should be allowed personal autonomy just like everyone else. Conservatives should be able to value this

 

[dem]

Geez why people want to enjoy their life when they are young and full of energy and keep child breeding for when they are older and wiser.

If this was sophie's choice the movie would have ended after 5 min.

I think most people who have kids late realize they should have done it earlier.

We had kids around 30 and honestly.. probably should have done it a few years earlier.


As far as feminism goes... I'd like to think most people fall in the "Women should be able to be electricians if they want" brand of feminism... not the full blown feminazi camp.

 

[GymWolf]

I think most people who have kids late realize they should have done it earlier.

We had kids around 30 and honestly.. probably should have done it a few years earlier.

I really don't think you can actually speak for "most" people but ok.

I was also not talking about making kids in your 40 or 50, more like second half of 20 and 30, from 18 to 25 people should just have fun if they want to, really nothing bad about that.

There are many things that are better enjoyed as youngsters.

 

[thefool]

There is no easy way out of this mess



This is levels of indoctrination that will take decades to fight back. And women are our only way out of this mess, birth rates, immigration, etc. It's ironic that if you look at this, the easy solution would be to exclusively push for women immigrants because evidently men do want to keep forge bonds and having families. Instead, armies of men invade europe every day lol

 

[Jsisto]

Obviously there are exceptions, but anyone that actually knows or works with single, unmarried women without children over a certain age….youd know that they are some of the unhappiest people around.

 

[RCX]

Find a woman (preferably a hot one but do your best)

Have kids.

Don't worry about the money. You'll figure it out.

Its fucking great.

 

[Sinozen]

Of course there were always gay people but this is not possible to be natural:

Young minds are easy to manipulate. Some young people THINK that they are X, Y, Z - not just plain, old, boring hetero.

Children should be free of this indoctrination - both from religion and LGBT cult. But with social media so easily available and how much this cancer had spread in institutions, I doubt this is possible.

If it's not hurting anyone. Who cares? So kids explore their identity? Why is that a bad thing? Who does it hurt? Their religious parents? Maybe they're the ones that should change. I think the trans stuff can be tricky when drugs and permanent alterations to the body come into play. LGBT is about acceptance while the religious indoctrination has brought about the opposite.

If you look at societies where there they're open to sexuality people generally don't stick to heterosexuality. Sexuality is more of a spectrum for a lot of people.

 

[Bojji]

If it's not hurting anyone. Who cares? So kids explore their identity? Why is that a bad thing? I think the trans stuff can be tricky when drugs and permanent alterations to the body come into play. LGBT is about acceptance while the religious indoctrination has brought about the opposite.

It's not hurting anyone? I bet this creates a shit ton of mental health problems and in the long run will hurt birthrates even more. And that is just queer/*whatever*sexual stuff, trans stuff can have long lasting health problems just like you said.

Add this to the pile:

Western society is fucked. I would like to be optimistic about future but I can't...

 

[Sinozen]

It's not hurting anyone? I bet this creates a shit ton of mental health problems and in the long run will hurt birthrates even more. And that is just queer/*whatever*sexual stuff, trans stuff can have long lasting health problems just like you said.

Add this to the pile:

Western society is fucked. I would like to be optimistic about future but I can't...

Where is the evidence identifying as gay will result in mental illness? These people are happy asf, it's literally called gay. The only reason trans is an issue is because the medical industry realized it can make a shit ton of money off these vulnerable people. That's the real issue.

This shortage of people will be replaced by AI. That's why I think we've had this narrative of overpopulation pushed on us. This has been a concern for a long time. If it doesn't turn out that way well then America can just import people.

 

[Bojji]

Where is the evidence identifying as gay will result in mental illness? These people are happy asf, it's literally called gay. The only reason trans is an issue is because the medical industry realized it can make a shit ton of money off these vulnerable people. That's the real issue.

This shortage of people will be replaced by AI. That's why I think we've had this narrative of overpopulation pushed on us. This has been a concern for a long time. If it doesn't turn out that way well then America can just import people.

Gay people are not the issue, they are here AT LEAST as long as first civilizations.

I'm talking about all the "new stuff", people identifying as cats, dogs etc. This is mental health issue:

Human race exists for 200 000 years and never before had to deal with this level of idiocy, hahaha.
I agree about Ai stuff, add it to the pile: low birthrates, climate change, high prices, stagnant wages, LGBT cult, Ai replacing people at work, illegal uncontrolled migration from 3rd world, speech control (like in UK and Germany) etc.
Future looks very optimistic...

 

[Sonik]

This comment is so good, a simple like doesn't do it.

Thank you, man, much appreciated

 

[Saber]

I don't agree, but each to their own.

What he said is 100% true.
Yes you have to make sacrifices, but so do with everything in life. If you choose to work, wouldn't be the same? You spent(or waste) your entire life working to make the money to pay your bills and most of times you make consecions and can't go to places you want to go, specially if its one of those works that barelly give you enought time to breath.
So yeah, you miss alot. But so do doing alot of things in life. Most people agree that having kids is fight worth for.

 

[bitbydeath]

What he said is 100% true.
Yes you have to make sacrifices, but so do with everything in life. If you choose to work, wouldn't be the same? You spent(or waste) your entire life working to make the money to pay your bills and most of times you make consecions and can't go to places you want to go, specially if is those one of works that barelly give you enought time to breath.
So yeah, you miss alot. But so do doing alot of things in life. Most people agree that having kids is fight worth for.

Kids are worth it but once you have them you are locked in.

 

[poodaddy]

What a stupid argument. It's exactly the reason why so many people are miserable today. Yes, you miss out on parties. So what? Is this what life is all about? How about you miss out on time with your grandchildren if you wait too long? Also, it no secret that it's much easier to pull all nighters or play around with children when you are younger. So by waiting longer you just make child rearing more difficult for yourself. So... what's it gonna be? Seems like people doing the waiting game isn't working out so well, is it?

I really don't get the focus on "having fun" or "enjoying life" before you get kids. It's all social media brain wash to make you spend money on shit you don't need instead of building a good family (which you do need). We really need to start reframing those statements away from that having kids is the "end of the good life" or something.

Also, living the easy life doesn't change anything. You'll still get older and you still won't like it.

Well fucking said.

 

[bitbydeath]

Well fucking said.

I'm talking from life experience, wait before you have kids. Plenty of time to play with your grandkids later, who cares if you're in your 60's by then, you're not their parents.

Living life is what we are here for.

 

[NotMyProblemAnymoreCunt]

 

[Humdinger]

I say this every time these sorts of "studies" (really just self-report questionnaire data) are raised - do not confuse correlation with causation.

There is a small but significant correlation between happiness and marriage. But that doesn't mean getting or being married causes you to be happy. As everyone who's taken a basic stats or experimental design course knows, you cannot infer causation from correlation - and yet that is what everyone does, almost reflexively when faced with these sorts of headlines.

The causal relationship is probably reversed - in other words, happier people are more likely to get married, and unhappier people less likely to get married. And so, you end up with married people looking happier - and yet, it's not because they are married and have children. It's because they were happier to begin with. Indeed, that's what a lot of research suggests.

 

[jason10mm]

I still have a very small glimmer of hope only because I know a friend who is the same age and is currently pregnant, my sister in law got pregnant at almost the same age, and I have another friend who's last kid she had at 44. That's really all that keeps me hopeful. It's the worst feeling and I feel like a failure even though it's not my fault but still, it's how my mind works. What gets me even more about it is I know someone who is a totally useless mother who's worked literally exactly 1 day in her life and has 5 children, she just lives off their baby bonuses. One kid is all I ask for. Garbage like that has 5. It's wild the way life works.

Bet you could swipe one and she'd never notice!

Sadly adoption is brutal these days as well.

 

[Beretta]

Bet you could swipe one and she'd never notice!

Sadly adoption is brutal these days as well.

Lol

Yeah adoption is insane I mean I know they want to make sure kids go to good homes but I don't want to wait years. My mom wanted to adopt a kid a while ago and the wait was 8 years….i don't want to be grandmother age by the time I get a kid, I'm already almost there lol and other options are expensive. I'd love to have a surrogate but it's $10, 000 or more. I certainly ain't swimming in cash for that.

 

[Kamina]

Single bitter feminist harpies telling young women that they are more fulfilled when they make careers and stay single, should have been the obvious clue.

 

[consoul]

The causal relationship is probably reversed - in other words, happier people are more likely to get married, and unhappier people less likely to get married.

Was thinking exactly this.

That people might be more inclined to marry and have children with happier people seems like a far more natural conclusion to reach.

 

[Humdinger]

Was thinking exactly this.

That people might be more inclined to marry and have children with happier people seems like a far more natural conclusion to reach.

Yes. It makes sense when you think about it. Happier people are generally more likeable, more able to get along with others, more able to form stable relationships, etc. And conversely, you can see why a lot of things that are associated with unhappiness - poverty, serious health problems, mental illness, addiction, dangerous environments, personality disorders, history of abuse/trauma, etc. - would make it less likely that person would either get or stay married.

 

[StreetsofBeige]

Yes. It makes sense when you think about it. Happier people are generally more likeable, more able to get along with others, more able to form stable relationships, etc. And conversely, you can see why a lot of things that are associated with unhappiness - poverty, serious health problems, mental illness, addiction, dangerous environments, personality disorders, history of abuse/trauma, etc. - would make it less likely that person would either get or stay married.

I'd add loner syndrome too. even though some people prefer being single or being hermits, I dont a get a sense those kinds of people are going to be as happy as a family with a happy marriage with kids.

 

[Humdinger]

I'd add loner syndrome too. even though some people prefer being single or being hermits, I dont a get a sense those kinds of people are going to be as happy as a family with a happy marriage with kids.

Yeah, there are some people who just would not be happy in a marriage. I'm probably one of them (was married once - it felt like I was trying to live someone else's life). And conversely, there are some people who thrive in marriage.

That's another thing I usually point out when these sorts of survey reports get posted. They are based on simple summary statistics - group averages, in most cases. But you are not a group average. You are an individual. What works for the average Joe or Jane may not work for you. Group averages gloss over a huge range of individual variability.

 

[touchfuzzy]

I'm talking from life experience, wait before you have kids. Plenty of time to play with your grandkids later, who cares if you're in your 60's by then, you're not their parents.

Living life is what we are here for.

I think a big part of the issue is that a lot of childless people aren't "living life" like you're imagining. Like for every 1 highly successful childless person who has a kickass job / career, lots of money, huge social network, and travels the world doing everything they ever wanted, there's 100 that are working dead end jobs barely making ends meet, miserably lonely, and spend every evening watching TV and doom scrolling.

 

[violence]

Single bitter feminist harpies telling young women that they are more fulfilled when they make careers and stay single, should have been the obvious clue.

The ideology is it pure loser mentality written by unsuccessful women. You only listen to them if you want to own a cat.

 

[bitbydeath]

I think a big part of the issue is that a lot of childless people aren't "living life" like you're imagining. Like for every 1 highly successful childless person who has a kickass job / career, lots of money, huge social network, and travels the world doing everything they ever wanted, there's 100 that are working dead end jobs barely making ends meet, miserably lonely, and spend every evening watching TV and doom scrolling.

You're right, I was referring to the normal folk who enjoy living life and aren't afraid to leave the house.

 

[Axelon]

I've seen videos of people saying their 3 year old is gay.

That is absolutely insane.

This reminds me of when I was in high school and everyone thought it was "cool" to be bi. That shit disappeared shortly after but in today's world, it's just reinforced.

I saw a post on reddit saying their 2 male cats were gay because they tried to hump each other. They weren't joking either. I rolled my eyes hard.

They make this stuff up in their weirdo head and avoid thinking of what they are really doing. They don't understand humping of the same gender is a instinct of being dominant and of being in control, not made up nonsense of a love relationship.

 

[GateofD]

What's the happiness level of single female gamers with no kids

 

[jason10mm]

What's the happiness level of single female gamers with no kids

Mythical

 

[Neolombax]

The study is a bit weird for me. Does the study discern between whether being married or having/not having kids are their choices in the first place? what about married women who arent able to have kids and do not adopt? I have a friend who has 2 kids with his girlfriend but isnt married because he told me in Germany its costlier to live as a married couple (?). Does having a legally binding relationship give that much more sense of security for couples that reduces anxiety in general?

In any case, my view of marriage has always been a commitment. You go into it knowing its going to be extremely hard at times, but you'll have each others backs no matter what. There's highs and lows, you just roll with the punches.