Doctor Decimate
Member
Previously (sort of):
71: Mercy Mission
Episode 72 of Star Wars: The Clone Wars finds C-3PO and R2-D2 on the way home from their latest affront to my senses. As our golden moron reports the events of the last episode to Padme, he tempts fate by saying that he hopes he never has to undertake a mission like that again. This, of course, prompts a Separatist attack. Searching for a way off the cruiser, the droids come across a battle between the Jedi in charge (I should know her name by now but I dont; she has some weird tentacles and thats how I identify her) and Grievous, as well as some clones and some droids. They realize that this is not a place they want to be and turn back around, the camera amusingly still on them instead of the battle, which occurs in the background. The droids enter the hangar and take off in a fighter, which gives R2 the opportunity to indulge in his greatest desire: to fuck shit up. He manages to take down several of the enemy as their former cruiser explodes in the background before heading to a nearby planet, a droid fighter in pursuit.
R2 manages to destroy the opposing craft, but he takes a hit in the process and their ship goes down. 3PO melodramatically goes on about disintegrating as they land, and once they land he complains about the ship. Amid ear-splitting shrieks, the droids get Gullivers Traveled as they are tied down to the ground by the tiny native aliens. From speaking with them, 3PO gathers that their leader, the Big Hay-Zu, is a bit of a huge asshole. Eventually, Hay-Zu, an obese version of the tiny aliens in a floating chair, arrives and tells them to leave. R2 is not a fan of this character, and once hes freed, he starts threatening Hay-Zu. 3PO smacks R2 on the back, which accidentally pushes the droid on top of the Big Hay-Zu, killing the ruler instantly. His blood sticks to the front of R2 for the remainder of the episode. No, really. As the aliens make repairs to the ship, they ask 3PO to be their new ruler. He refuses, asking them to select the three among them that they feel are the most qualified. The one who receives the most cheers is crowned the leader; 3PO congratulates them on their new democracy as he boards the ship with R2. The aliens begin punching and kicking each other as the droids depart the planet.
Mid-flight, R2 informs 3PO that both they and the ship are running out of power, so they land on another planet, a primitive world according to the scanners. Soon, they are captured with an electrified net by some sentient aliens and taken to their leader, a massive hologram. Three guesses how this goes. As 3PO tries to tame the holograms anger at being referred to as a hologram, R2 manages to gaze behind the proverbial curtain: a hidden door in the face of a cliff housing several tiny droids all working together to work the hologram and enslave the planets denizens. The aliens catch on and open fire on the droids and the machines within the cliff, causing a massive explosion that presumably kills all of them. With no options left, R2 and 3PO take shelter under a tree as their power runs out. Its a bit of a weird moment, as its played for some poignancy when we know these droids are definitely going to survive and its at odds with the general tone of the episode.
Eventually, some pirates arrive to salvage R2 and 3POs ship, finding the droids in the process. Their power is restored on the ship and they are taken to a droid fighting ring. Its a scene that is disappointingly cut short as the ship comes under fire from Grievous (target practice is the excuse), who has captured Tentacles the Jedi because she was unable to accomplish what a couple of gungans could and defeat the general. The Separatists blast a hole in the droid fighting ring, and 3PO and R2 are sucked out into space as the pirate ship explodes. R2s jets carry them to a hangar on the Separatist cruiser, where enemy droids send them to the incinerator, believing them to be pirate droids. The cavalry arrives just in time as Republic cruisers appear from hyperspace to launch a rescue of Tentacles the Jedi. 3PO and R2 approach the Republic troops, one of whom is Wolffe from last episode, who is not at all happy to see 3PO. 3PO begins to tell Plo Koon about the adventure they just had, and he passes the droid off to Wolffe. Poor guy.
This is actually an okay episode for the most part. I enjoyed some of the dark comedy, enough to offset the fact that 3PO sucks. R2 going around with some guy's blood on him for literally the entire episode was a great touch, and I liked the fact that the camera kept focusing on the droids as huge explosions and some fights took place in the background. That being said, it moves along a little too quickly. I would've liked some more time to be spent on the droids running around as stuff happened behind them, and the whole droid fighting thing feels like a missed opportunity. The Wizard of Oz thing and subsequent power loss was lame, too.
Grade: C+
Next time, we finally get to the good stuff with the best arc of the series so far.
