They do that blank video no review shtick far too often, not surprised.
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Transformers: The Last Knight |SPOILER THREAD| The worst movie about cars this year
- Thread starter Toa TAK
- Start date
They do that blank video no review shtick far too often, not surprised.
Ether_Snake
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The only reason this movie has the whole England/Arthur thing going on was to get those UK tax credits, like so many other movies have been doing over the past few years in varying levels.
https://stephenfollows.com/film-tax-breaks-by-the-numbers/
https://stephenfollows.com/film-tax-breaks-by-the-numbers/
Actually this was the first one they made after convening a story group.
One of the most aggressively terrible movies I have ever seen. It was somehow worse than Age of Extinction. I swear, if felt like the Transformers were in this less than the first movie.
The one thing that impressed me was how much easier the action was to track. Bay used way more pulled out wide shots and less shaky cam. Also less cutting away during actual transformations.
The one thing that impressed me was how much easier the action was to track. Bay used way more pulled out wide shots and less shaky cam. Also less cutting away during actual transformations.
Scarecrow
Member
Frozenprince
Banned
I do NOT understand how this is marketed to kids.
They cuss like motherfuckers in this.
They cuss like motherfuckers in this.
Scarecrow
Member
I thought they were going to do a Goonies/Super 8/Stranger Things when they started with the group of kids at the beginning. Was the "best" part of the movie. Could've been neat.
I've watched all episodes of Half in the Bag and they've literally never done this before.
RoninChaos
Member
Why is or how is megatron even alive?
Scarecrow
Member
I don't specifically remember anything as blatant as "Decepticons were whippin slaves in the fields" but there is a small exposition montage calling out the who's who of famous people throughout history (Edison, Wright Bros, Harriet Tubman, etc.) It's like they want to sow seeds for an Assassin's Creed type of alt-history, but with ROBOTS! Shit, they've already done ancient Egypt, pre-historic era, King Arthur, Nazis...
But this is Bay. I wouldn't put it past him in the slightest to actually make a movie in which Autobots free slaves.
ShinoguTakeruKoeru
Member
In movie 4, they retconned Megatron's death to be not-all-the-way-dead and he was able to leak his own specs to the tech company making nano-machine transformers so they could build him a new body with the name Galvatron.
And... he decided to be Megatron again because.
This was actually my favorite one. Note, that does not mean it's good. Because objectively the movie is fucking terrible. But this is the first one to cross into so bad it's good territory for me and not be a boring mess.
This one had:
Everything and everyone of importance in human history, that would be seen as a "good guy", being allied with the Transformers.
The Transformers fighting Nazis.
A sociopathic robot butler who looks like C-3PO.
Bumblebee magically getting his voice back for the movies Martha moment only to instantly lose it again.
Marky Mark fighting both flying robotic drones and the Gekko's from Metal Gear Solid.
Optimus Prime disappearing for the entire movie because he's evil, appearing only to turn good again five minutes later and then fucking off again until the climax where he shows up riding a robot dragon that looks like King Ghidorah.
Megatron negotiating with lawyers.
Almost every fight scene amounting to the Transformers flopping around like a bad video game rag doll effect. Grimlock in particular is fucking hilarious.
Every character in the movie, no matter how little sense it makes, having no dialogue beyond making "amusing" quips with the person they're interacting with.
The unsuitably epic music swelling as Marky Mark lifts up a Medieval sword surrounded by Transformers.
Like this might legitimately be the stupidest fucking movie I've ever seen. But damn was it entertaining in its stupidity.
This one had:
Everything and everyone of importance in human history, that would be seen as a "good guy", being allied with the Transformers.
The Transformers fighting Nazis.
A sociopathic robot butler who looks like C-3PO.
Bumblebee magically getting his voice back for the movies Martha moment only to instantly lose it again.
Marky Mark fighting both flying robotic drones and the Gekko's from Metal Gear Solid.
Optimus Prime disappearing for the entire movie because he's evil, appearing only to turn good again five minutes later and then fucking off again until the climax where he shows up riding a robot dragon that looks like King Ghidorah.
Megatron negotiating with lawyers.
Almost every fight scene amounting to the Transformers flopping around like a bad video game rag doll effect. Grimlock in particular is fucking hilarious.
Every character in the movie, no matter how little sense it makes, having no dialogue beyond making "amusing" quips with the person they're interacting with.
The unsuitably epic music swelling as Marky Mark lifts up a Medieval sword surrounded by Transformers.
Like this might legitimately be the stupidest fucking movie I've ever seen. But damn was it entertaining in its stupidity.
MotionBlue
Member
Pros:
+Transformer lore callbacks!
+No creepy pedo jokes
+Diverse cast, old faces too!
+Hannibal
+The least amount of shaky cam yet!
Cons
-The story
-The directing
-Shaky cam
-bad humor
-Pacing
-That fucking submarine never transformed
-Prime just fucks off for huge portions of the movie without explanation
Much better than Revenge of the Fallen. First movie is still my favorite. Ties Dark of the moon for second.
/thread
+Transformer lore callbacks!
+No creepy pedo jokes
+Diverse cast, old faces too!
+Hannibal
+The least amount of shaky cam yet!
Cons
-The story
-The directing
-Shaky cam
-bad humor
-Pacing
-That fucking submarine never transformed
-Prime just fucks off for huge portions of the movie without explanation
Much better than Revenge of the Fallen. First movie is still my favorite. Ties Dark of the moon for second.
/thread
ronaldthump
Member
Monocle
Member
This is absolutely true. Nothing in The Mummy is remotely as entertaining as Hopkins or Cogworth. I defy anyone to find it. They can't because it doesn't exist.
Still better than The Mummy.
Also, Prime's hero moments are better than anything in The Mummy, even though by now they are so formulaic they might as well be their own trope. Thank Peter Cullen and his voice for that. Pure charisma.
The Mummy is the quintessential bland star-driven thriller. It should win an award for how bland it is. What a remarkable achievement.
Miles Quaritch
Member
What the fuck was Bay thinking with some of the new decepticons he introduces here? I can't even remember their names, but he sure does love his stereotypes huh? Making one a 'thug' with a gold chain? Cunt.
The rest of the movie was offensively bad, the whole Unicron is Earth was such BS I don't even know what the fuck the point of that shit was. Oh LOL, Unicron was actually in every movie all along, hurrrr. Cunt.
The only good things about the movie were Anthony Hopkins and Cogman. The latter might be a direct rip of C3PO, but he was still a joy to watch, especially when interacting with Hopkins, who was literally having the time of his life here. He was cheesing it up to maximum effect and was literally the only reason I didn't walk out.
The rest of the movie was offensively bad, the whole Unicron is Earth was such BS I don't even know what the fuck the point of that shit was. Oh LOL, Unicron was actually in every movie all along, hurrrr. Cunt.
The only good things about the movie were Anthony Hopkins and Cogman. The latter might be a direct rip of C3PO, but he was still a joy to watch, especially when interacting with Hopkins, who was literally having the time of his life here. He was cheesing it up to maximum effect and was literally the only reason I didn't walk out.
Yes that is it! Thank you!
Dead Man Typing
Member
This film made no sense.
I had a lot of fun watching it because I had no idea what was going to happen next. I didn't see any of the trailers so things just kept happening in random orders and then being forgotten.
It was genuinely baffling and I found that experience entertaining.
You've got John Goodman and Ken Watanabe playing throw away autobots with about 10 lines each. Steve Buscemi as a transformer salesman. And on top you've got Anthony Hopkins having the time of his life playing an insane English Aristocrat who has a robot butler.
I'm really happy I saw this. It's completely insane that something like this is allowed to exist.
Terrible in every conceivable story element. No cohesive plot or character development.
Looked good and sounded great though. I've never seen so many explosions in a medieval English battle.
I had a lot of fun watching it because I had no idea what was going to happen next. I didn't see any of the trailers so things just kept happening in random orders and then being forgotten.
It was genuinely baffling and I found that experience entertaining.
You've got John Goodman and Ken Watanabe playing throw away autobots with about 10 lines each. Steve Buscemi as a transformer salesman. And on top you've got Anthony Hopkins having the time of his life playing an insane English Aristocrat who has a robot butler.
I'm really happy I saw this. It's completely insane that something like this is allowed to exist.
Terrible in every conceivable story element. No cohesive plot or character development.
Looked good and sounded great though. I've never seen so many explosions in a medieval English battle.
It sucked but it was better than the last one. The parts on Cybertron were the best parts of the movie. Optimus was gone for over half of it which was trash and racist robots made their return. I fell asleep during Anthony Hopkins explanation of something.
I don't know why I see these, hoping they will get it right some day.
I don't know why I see these, hoping they will get it right some day.
BeatnikGunsoo
Member
I knew it was gonna be bad I just didn't comprehend how bad it would be
I was sitting there 10 minutes into the movie and I was thinking to myself "Wow this shit sucks" and it gets worse from there
and this is from a guy who non-ironically liked the first 4 so you know it's bad man
fuck this movie
goddamnit
I was sitting there 10 minutes into the movie and I was thinking to myself "Wow this shit sucks" and it gets worse from there
and this is from a guy who non-ironically liked the first 4 so you know it's bad man
fuck this movie
goddamnit
GiantBombGamer
Member
This was definitely in the top 5 worst movies I've seen in a theater. Not overall, I've seen some worse ones on TV, Netflix, ect...but as far as in theater bombs, easily top 5. Fuck, I didnt think anything would top the shit sandwich that "Life" was a few months ago, but at least "Life" wasn't 2.5 hours. 2.5 hours that felt like 4.
This made the King Arthur movie and Pirates feel like goddamn joyrides. Seriously, this movie is a chore.
This made the King Arthur movie and Pirates feel like goddamn joyrides. Seriously, this movie is a chore.
Did you guys get in trouble prior?I saw this for free, but feel like I should have been paid to watch it.
Technically I was, as it was a work screening
I can only believe that it was punishment.
HoodWinked
Member
i think this may actually be a good movie with editing and better scene continuity.
also i laughed at the pure absurdity of the scene where anthony hopkins tries to take megatron by himself with a puny gun then gets blown away hurling him into the air in slow motion.
also i laughed at the pure absurdity of the scene where anthony hopkins tries to take megatron by himself with a puny gun then gets blown away hurling him into the air in slow motion.
Daffy Duck
Member
100% agreed.
I loved every minute of it.
One thing I'm annoyed about is the Unicron stuff as it just felt like it was done to appease fans asking for him in a Bay live action Transformers, you also know it's never going to go anywhere because that would mean earth being destroyed.
Also this millions of people just killed.
The Unicron plot comes directly from Transformers Prime. Bay never wanted to do Unicron because he said he didn't know how to make interesting with him just being a planet, so one of the writers probably told him "Hey they did this in that show" and he finally found an idea he liked.
That's funny considering he can barely make anyone else interesting.
Gabriel_Logan
Member
They've done it for their trailer breakdowns. They should stop. Its not funny.
The editing was definitely distracting. Perhaps they cut out a lot of connecting scenes to get the movie to 2h30m?
The movie is 2h30m, but there's never any time to breathe, it's constantly people screaming, cars driving, robots fighting, it's too much. Yet it feels like 3 hours, but ast the same time feels like it could have worked better being either shorter or being a little but longer.
This movie was paced like a god damn cocaine binge to be honest.
I have no doubt the movie was a solid 3 hours before, forcing Bay to edit and trim it down as much as he could which is why it feels the way it does.
This movie was paced like a god damn cocaine binge to be honest.
I have no doubt the movie was a solid 3 hours before, forcing Bay to edit and trim it down as much as he could which is why it feels the way it does.
Yes. A day after watching it, I can barely remember any of the finer details anymore. The entire thing is a haze, like a fevered dream.
AoE wasn't like this at all. I know people hate it, but that movie was just way too long because it had like 5 acts. Each act had a point and a flow to it, it just made the overall movie padded with lots of side quests. TLK has no acts. It has no grand flow. It is just a bombardment of idea after idea that someone thought was "cool". Without end.
brandonh83
Banned
I've been saying this since it came out, just utterly shameless. The trailers say family friendly but the actual movies aren't, well especially this one. Plenty of shit in the others too but this was the most severe IMO.
What's worse is that it's just there and doesn't add anything, it's just mindless and to be there to be "edgy."
I dunno, there are random parts of the movie which make no sense other than being clearly inserted "for kids" even though the tone is all off. I think Bay really does think that this is for kids because this is what he would want to watch as a kid. Take for example the totally unexplained baby Autobots. There is NO FUCKING REASON for there to be a bunch of baby sized dinobots just... chilling around like cute pets. But there you have it.
I want plushies.
I had to go see this last night (No pun intended) and it was an absolute fucking mess of a movie. It was like the first, second and third acts were literally the first, second and third acts from three different movies stuck together.
Anthony Hopkins was a riot though, fantastic dialogue I refuse to believe could have been written by anyone involved in writing the rest of this mess. Worth sitting through the movie for him alone... almost.
Also... what was the point of the little girl? She seemed to have no purpose at all.
Anthony Hopkins was a riot though, fantastic dialogue I refuse to believe could have been written by anyone involved in writing the rest of this mess. Worth sitting through the movie for him alone... almost.
Also... what was the point of the little girl? She seemed to have no purpose at all.
blitzwolf215
Member
What's really annoying is that Cade being the Last Knight is pointless. It goes nowhere and is dropped toward the end. Honestly, they could have given more screen time to Vivian since her character is integral to the plot, but nope she is sidelined to be Cade's love interest.
Black_Stride
do not tempt fate do not contrain Wonder Woman's thighs do not do not
Gemma Chan is listed as the voice of Quintessa...is she who also plays the human version.
im assuming its a human quintessa who shows up in the post credits?
im assuming its a human quintessa who shows up in the post credits?
I guess the movie needed more strong female support? I dunno. But her little blue robot did destroy that one big gun though.
Despite the movie being horrible, with some good action, at least it was funny. It has its moments.
"You are by far the coolest".
Sunster
Member
yesGemma Chan is listed as the voice of Quintessa...is she who also plays the human version.
im assuming its a human quintessa who shows up in the post credits?
Saw this and honestly have no idea what the fuck I watching for the first 2 hours. But once the ridiculousness of the last 30 minutes came on, my brain just automatically turned itself off and enjoyed the clusterfuck.
An overpriced, enjoyable ride that I would only watch on a nice, big IMAX screen. Forget watching this at home without the audio + visuals.
An overpriced, enjoyable ride that I would only watch on a nice, big IMAX screen. Forget watching this at home without the audio + visuals.
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