This is very important on the make up bit.
Granted I LOVE the tranny look so I do it on purpose but you can get great tips from doing a sit down like this.
Recommend it to anyone not traditionally taught make up.
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Transgaf: 'cause boys will be girls (and vice versa)
- Thread starter lexi
- Start date
Granted I LOVE the tranny look so I do it on purpose but you can get great tips from doing a sit down like this.
Recommend it to anyone not traditionally taught make up.
Got taken for trans in the Chappelle thread.
. . . I feel pretty okay about that. I don't think I flat out said I MIGHT be, but I also kinda spoke in a way that implied I viewed myself as belonging there.
EDIT: People need to pay attention when I bring up brain wiring though. Biology runs on its own mad definition of "logic" separate from our own conscious logic.
. . . I feel pretty okay about that. I don't think I flat out said I MIGHT be, but I also kinda spoke in a way that implied I viewed myself as belonging there.
EDIT: People need to pay attention when I bring up brain wiring though. Biology runs on its own mad definition of "logic" separate from our own conscious logic.
And another thing (been long enough since my post) I would kind of like to revisit that topic made a few years back asking if you'd have a perfect sex change for $10 million but revisit it as being about sex, sexuality, and gender identity. That is, take it but keep your mind exactly the same (barring hormonal effects naturally) and risk dysphoria and maybe being gay doesn't work out so great, flip both your sexuality and gender identity but your personality, interests, etc WILL change to some extent so it's like you're a fundamentally different person who might be like who you once were, or run with all three changed for way more money but definitely becoming a different person, like a brother or sister who inherited your memories. Also everyone you knew will be informed and may even have media attention over it.
I probably day dream too much, but I think that's a more realistic way to handle it while still attaching consequences to it.
I probably day dream too much, but I think that's a more realistic way to handle it while still attaching consequences to it.
You have to be REALLY specific what you mean by hormonal changes because lots of people believe lots of stuff that have nothing to do with hormones happens because of hormones, like Sexual Orientation
Would need to find a good source listing the changes. Far as I know that's mainly changing how your sexual libido works, how your emotions work ("rawer" and calmer as female, "deadened" with easier rage as male), and your sense of smell (and for a full change you'd get changed senses anyway.) Sounds to me that if hormones change your sexuality it was a latent sexuality more properly understood/realized via hormones.
Team Alucard
Banned
Welp, I just found out my insurance is trans-exclusionary.
Won't even cover mental health therapists for gender identity which means I'm on the hook for about $500 for my two therapy visits. Never mind HRT.
I'll have to see about dropping off of my parent's plan and seeing if I can get on medicaid, as I know that is trans-inclusionary in my state, but that would also require coming out to my dad which I don't think I'm ready to do.
Won't even cover mental health therapists for gender identity which means I'm on the hook for about $500 for my two therapy visits. Never mind HRT.
I'll have to see about dropping off of my parent's plan and seeing if I can get on medicaid, as I know that is trans-inclusionary in my state, but that would also require coming out to my dad which I don't think I'm ready to do.
Hella Lugosi
Member
When I saw my gender therapist they told me that for insurance reasons they didn't classify my care as gender therapy. They just put down "anxiety" or whatever because insurance covered that. But I was still there for gender stuff.
Same with HRT they just say it's for "unspecified endocrine disorder" and that way insurance covers it.
Is there an LGBT health center near where you live? Those places are usually good about helping with that kinda stuff.
That's right, if I want to go anywhere I will need to check what my MediCal choice covers. At least I don't have to worry about a dilemma like your's (and my dad is one of the last people I want to come out to, even if it was just "maybe not quite fully male?")
EDIT: Though there's Lugosi's point! And looking up unaware dysphoria symptoms I'd probably pursue sooner than later just to get myself energized and motivated again. And if that were the case ... I'm kind of afraid to make the analogy my situation feels like.
EDIT: Though there's Lugosi's point! And looking up unaware dysphoria symptoms I'd probably pursue sooner than later just to get myself energized and motivated again. And if that were the case ... I'm kind of afraid to make the analogy my situation feels like.
You could always come up with another reason like wanting to become more independent and self sufficient
its worth checking around for different programs though. for example near me, Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh will cover therapy and I think hrt for anyone under 25
AppleSeason
Member
EMLA + Plastic film applied to the area + Ibuprofen. I usually take out my shoes for maximum comfort while the session last, and concentrate in producing a long controlled breathing to keep me away from thinking about the pain. I usually say "no pain, no gain", but in the end the benefit outweights the cost, so I don't think a lot about the pain I'm going to endure. I remember the first laser sessions as much much worse than current electro.
And speaking about that, I'd better get ready. Tomorrow is my last full shave before letting my remaining hair grow for a week to make it zappable. In the last monthly session there was no time to do the upper lip, and this time I've gotten considerable regrowth on the neck (sparse hairs). An area that had been hair free since the laser times. I don't have my next blood test until may and I'm concerned about finding a higher T level.
Got the ball rolling for therapy about my depression rather than just counseling, but felt more excited about finding some doorway to getting gender stuff sorted out. Perhaps even now I'm in some sort of denial in regards to what I'll actually say when there may be a (figurative or literal) voice in my head screaming "you're a girl!" that isn't just my brain thinking random wild thoughts.
Umm. Kinda worried about dialing back my Paxil and cutting it though (but I can just call and get that re-instated, or perhaps replaced since I have had wooziness after taking it) and the fact he apparently put it down as "Gender Identity Disorder" but this is the guy that I think is more about handling the meds than anything else.
EDIT: Actually I guess I'll say that analogy I was thinking of before. It'd be like some screwy mix of Ranma 1/2 and Enigma of Amigara Fault, in that I consciously want to avoid going down that route because of the worries about social stigmas and throwing away privilege (and at an extreme screw up reconciling with my family? Though after the last several emails my dad sent me...), and my personality/interests mean I shouldn't stick out badly staying as a guy, but in the end my subconscious DEMANDS to go into that hole and I come out a girl. Well, that'd probably be a lot nicer than Amigara Fault was!
Umm. Kinda worried about dialing back my Paxil and cutting it though (but I can just call and get that re-instated, or perhaps replaced since I have had wooziness after taking it) and the fact he apparently put it down as "Gender Identity Disorder" but this is the guy that I think is more about handling the meds than anything else.
EDIT: Actually I guess I'll say that analogy I was thinking of before. It'd be like some screwy mix of Ranma 1/2 and Enigma of Amigara Fault, in that I consciously want to avoid going down that route because of the worries about social stigmas and throwing away privilege (and at an extreme screw up reconciling with my family? Though after the last several emails my dad sent me...), and my personality/interests mean I shouldn't stick out badly staying as a guy, but in the end my subconscious DEMANDS to go into that hole and I come out a girl. Well, that'd probably be a lot nicer than Amigara Fault was!
Being trans is a life full of "...thanks, I guess"
Like my favorite "you look like a real woman" ... I could pay for a cosmetic surgery if I had a penny the amount of time I asked the person "did you stop to think what you mean by that ?" and the person was mind blown of how transphobic that sentence was
Like my favorite "you look like a real woman" ... I could pay for a cosmetic surgery if I had a penny the amount of time I asked the person "did you stop to think what you mean by that ?" and the person was mind blown of how transphobic that sentence was
I'm lucky. I don't wish to go back and be a girl as a child. As much as I hated being born physically a male I still got three wonderful babies out of it.Made a Dana Simpson Thread and found this on my old hard drive while making it. Before Dana pulled it, believe she gave this piece the name "Dreaming...".
I thought it would be appropriate to post here. I find it quite powerful.
I'm an odd ball but thankful that that is one pain I dodged.
afer I made the post he followed up with telling me it would work even better with hrt and possibly surgery. I get that he's trying to be encouraging but whyyyyy...
do you normally find it helpful to call them out on it?
Strangely I find wanting to be a little girl odd. Maybe that's why while the concept attracted me then my interests were decidedly NOT in line with a stereotypical girl's and that's why I didn't care then and had more conflicting opinions growing up.
But then you drop the stereotypes of tea parties and crap and it'd probably just be arguing with parents to get me Transformers (or, uhh, I'd roll with My Little Pony, but then TRANSFORMERS TRANSFORM!!!)
LOL I'm the same.
Plus I can find way more LBGT/sadeath themes in Transformers anyway.
I mean there is a reason I love Ultra Magnus so much.
Watch Da Birdie
I buy cakes for myself on my birthday it's not weird lots of people do it I bet
I feel like the comic is more about feeling regret that one didn't transition earlier in life rather than specifically wanting to feel like a little girl...
To be honest I do think one needs to still try and act their age regardless of what gender they identify with, to an extent of course---acting like a twenty-something is one thing, but when you read the stories of people wanting to be treated specifically like a little kid I don't think that's even being trans anymore, that seems like a far more complex issue. I remember being unnerved a bit by Holy Baikal on here for example as while I could totally agree with her on some aspect of wanting to feel and be treated like a woman, her obsession with basically becoming an underage anime character seemed to cross a line that I myself aren't necessarily comfortable with.
For me though I'm not even in my thirties and don't have any relationships so I still feel pretty youthful, my goal is to transition while simultaneously becoming more mature such as finding my own place and maybe striking up a relationship, but I'm kind of nervous about how that will play out...to be honest I'm really confused on the exact terminology and such to use when it comes to sexual attraction while being trans.
To be honest I do think one needs to still try and act their age regardless of what gender they identify with, to an extent of course---acting like a twenty-something is one thing, but when you read the stories of people wanting to be treated specifically like a little kid I don't think that's even being trans anymore, that seems like a far more complex issue. I remember being unnerved a bit by Holy Baikal on here for example as while I could totally agree with her on some aspect of wanting to feel and be treated like a woman, her obsession with basically becoming an underage anime character seemed to cross a line that I myself aren't necessarily comfortable with.
For me though I'm not even in my thirties and don't have any relationships so I still feel pretty youthful, my goal is to transition while simultaneously becoming more mature such as finding my own place and maybe striking up a relationship, but I'm kind of nervous about how that will play out...to be honest I'm really confused on the exact terminology and such to use when it comes to sexual attraction while being trans.
Ultra Magnus? Curious to hear about this, since my memories outside of the movie, some parts of Part 1, and the end of Part 2 are shot.
I'd kind of love to just loop through my 20s as the opposite sex each time admittedly, but the youngest I'd even want to be is probably 16 or something. Go through (mature) teenagehood again, or better yet just stick to the 20s when you're still very youthful but not so young as to have serious issues or still be too physically/mentally immature. 20s just seem to be the peak of ripeness in human development.
And now that I think about it I think part of my hangup was thinking I was too fat or disgusting to transition beyond the usual problems. I was weighed today and came out to be about 240, so I'd gained weight over the last few years to boot! How many others had the same sort of hand wringing?
It's more the comics.
Ultra Magnus in the DreamwAve run is Prime's white and blue twin brother who wears the outer armor and hides inside it.
He just wants to be accepted and he doesn't want to lead or take over for his brother.
Granted no gay or trans tones directly, but hiding and just wanting to be accepted as is and not what could be stuck me deeply.
I know there was a Transformers like that, don't know if it was Arcee though.
AppleSeason
Member
Only in the IDW comics continuity. Apparently he/she was tortured and modified at RNA level (robonucleic acid or something) so that he/she was basically perceived as something completely different by the rest of the bots, although they could not pinpoint exactly what it was (the concept of gender being brought to Transformers). As far as the spotlight comic goes, that gives him/her insane GID and goes batshit insane axecrazy. It's not like physical shape of a transformer matters (You could not tell Strika is female if it wasn't for Tara Strong voicing). Anyways, you can't take anything in Transformers as canon, they like rewriting continuity a bit too much.
There have been a few female transformers in previous series, but they were more like token characters for the occasional bot-romance and Girl-on-Girl Battle (there's always one of these in every series, as Arcee Vs Tharantula? in prime) and a bit of a "don't ask", as Transformers don't "reproduce" by normal means (usually a protoform generated by Primus (I think) is infused with a spark)
I tend to debate a bit more about if Smurfette would be the first transgender smurf. Smurfs don't reproduce either and there were no females (basically no genders) Until Gargamel created her and she identified as female (natural smurfs did not know what a female was), but it looked the same as any other smurf with just long hair, until Papa Smurf gave her FFS (this is literal, in the cartoon he uses magic, in the belgian original comics surgery).
Yeah, that was definitely Arcee, though they retconned that to not be the case.
Hell, I think it was that there were NO female Transformers then someone got the idea to fix that in the most thoughtless way possible. Which is... kinda problematic when you think about it.
And I can see Ranma being positive either as an example that made them think about it more, a character who didn't let a changed sex hold him back, or possibly even as an example of someone who got to be sexfluid when they want to be (though that's more for genderqueer positions which I still can't fully rule out for myself.)
Hell, I think it was that there were NO female Transformers then someone got the idea to fix that in the most thoughtless way possible. Which is... kinda problematic when you think about it.
And I can see Ranma being positive either as an example that made them think about it more, a character who didn't let a changed sex hold him back, or possibly even as an example of someone who got to be sexfluid when they want to be (though that's more for genderqueer positions which I still can't fully rule out for myself.)
AppleSeason
Member
Trust me, the insane bullshit they have pulled on the IDW comics (the only ones where this happens) has taken on so many levels that makes silver age DC comics look like the most normal thing ever. And well, that's the IDW continuity. Nothing has ever been mentioned in Aligned (War for Cybertron / Prime) or animated, much less the previous franchises. Not to mention that most female characters are turned male by the time the series reach Japan due to "female toys in toylines for kids don't sell".
Hella Lugosi
Member
Happy Trans Day Of Visibility everyone!
Watch Da Birdie
I buy cakes for myself on my birthday it's not weird lots of people do it I bet
Started curling my eyelashes and wearing a bit of mascara to work, not enough for people to notice unless they know I do that, but made me feel good. 
Didn't even know it was the Day of Visibility---hope this time next year I feel comfortable enough to be open with everyone about it.
Didn't even know it was the Day of Visibility---hope this time next year I feel comfortable enough to be open with everyone about it.
Yeah. Even if I go "no I'm not a trans woman" I'm definitely some kind of genderqueer because you don't go this long questioning your gender and being fascinated with gender bending stuff without being non-cis.
so theres this post that I think is worth correcting cause it says "I've even said I'd date a transgender woman"
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=199827432&postcount=56
and I was planning on responding with:
"I know you mean well but I wouldn't recommend saying that around a trans woman. It either comes across as patting yourself on the back or suggests that there's normally something wrong with dating transgender women."
would you say thats a good response?
(and tbh patting theirself on the back is exactly what they're doing but I don't really think it would be productive to accuse them of that)
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=199827432&postcount=56
and I was planning on responding with:
"I know you mean well but I wouldn't recommend saying that around a trans woman. It either comes across as patting yourself on the back or suggests that there's normally something wrong with dating transgender women."
would you say thats a good response?
(and tbh patting theirself on the back is exactly what they're doing but I don't really think it would be productive to accuse them of that)
I am in the minority here and I don't find anything wrong with this statement. I do believe Tran Women are different then Women in the same way a Woman and Man can be attracted to other ethnicities, gays or straights.
So I personally can't support them being called out on it, as I'd support them given unlike the I would even date a Trans Woman, I prefer to date TransWomen.
I don't disagree that theres different tastes involved when it comes to transwomen but the weirdness for me is how they're acting like its something special. saying "I'd even date an african american" or "I'd even date someone your height" makes it sound like its something they wouldn't ordinarily want to do but they'd make an exception
We have people on Neo Gaf who say flat out they won't date Trans Women, so all I read that as to that person they truly don't care so long a person identifies as a woman.
I personally think that was to highlight they just don't give a fuck about others sexuality.
Again I won't say it's wrong to take offense to the way it was worded, but I simply didn't see anything wrong with it.
I mean I do agree that thats exactly what was meant, I more wanted to respond to it to suggest that it could be worded better in the future, like what you said there is more clear (though obviously doesn't fit the same context exactly)
The thing I'm on the fence on, I guess, is whether that meaning is always apparent and there it wouldn't convey those undertones to people they're trying to show appreciation for.
also theres the other argument that they're bringing sex into it when its just talking about support. like the way they want to reassure trans women that they would support them is telling them that they would like to date them
but I'd definitely call out someone I knew well though cause I'd rather them not put it that way to me. makes me feel a bit uncomfortable
Watch Da Birdie
I buy cakes for myself on my birthday it's not weird lots of people do it I bet
I really need to find a specialist to talk to about my issues, the only person I feel comfortable talking with about them hasn't been available as much and I feel kind of guilty unloading the issues on them anyway---they're supportive but sometimes I feel they're just annoyed by me and it strains out friendship I guess. Been looking for a good therapist around where I live but can't find a satisfactory sounding one, the only one specializing in gender stuff as I said before seems like he just wants to rush people into surgery rather than really talking with them about it.
I actually went on wearing a bit of mascara today to the point it was noticeable, no one said anything but I saw people sort of double-take when they looked at me---to be honest it didn't make me feel happy like I thought it would, I was on edge all day and uncomfortable because I felt people were judging me. Right now I'm thinking about putting all this stuff on the back burner because I'm just not strong enough to deal with the stress right now of public opinion...really need to move someplace and start over I think, there's too much baggage to make a big change.
I actually went on wearing a bit of mascara today to the point it was noticeable, no one said anything but I saw people sort of double-take when they looked at me---to be honest it didn't make me feel happy like I thought it would, I was on edge all day and uncomfortable because I felt people were judging me. Right now I'm thinking about putting all this stuff on the back burner because I'm just not strong enough to deal with the stress right now of public opinion...really need to move someplace and start over I think, there's too much baggage to make a big change.
Butterfly Witch
Member
You are not alone.
If you need an ear or a shoulder, please feel free to PM me. I can't promise you solutions but I can promise you that I will not judge you and will listen to anything you may have to say.
That's basically what I'm doing. I'm going to move out from my parents house before I make significant strides privately, change socialization habits before I make changes publicly and get a new job before making changes professionally.
The way I figure it if I do it incrementally I can control each aspect better
It definitely does come with frustration over the pace though
"down with cis" has become a meme on tumblr because of that post. often used ironically in a sort of "thanks obama" kind of way though also parodying the trans-boogeyman that that post pretended exists
Oh. Gotcha ;-)
What is this?
They put a trans character on the expansion. One trans player said it sucked that she talks about the fact that she is trans with a stranger the first time they meet (you have to click like 3 dialogue options to see that she is trans ... but then again, which npc DOES NOT tell their entire life to the pc ? =P)
Now everyone is freaking out and random GGs are using the "it is a shit trans character because she tells that she is trans as the first thing she said" as a reason to complain that we have what, the 7th trans character in games EVER ? Even if they were right this is STILL a reason to celebrate because our standards is "better than birdetta and poison"
thats a valid critique in a lot of circumstances but like you said thats pretty much exactly how crpg characters work. Its really just a matter of a poorly written character (unless I'm missing something else) and being overly harsh on subpar writers trying something new isn't a way to promote variety.
Personally I was pretty excited to see Erica in Catherine even though parts of her story reinforce negative stereotypes.(though tbh I completely missed those until people told me later)
edit actually I'm changing my mind about it being poor writing. it makes perfect sense to ask about an odd name and go down that path (assuming thats what happens). the only other conclusion for the conversation is for her to deflect for the time being and maybe later bring it up which completely depends on personality
Erica's at least portrayed as just wanting to live as a normal human and have relationships without being worried about being chased off, but I have yet to see the full ending on that route. Was thinking I'd juast perfect each of the puzzles to skip as much actual replaying and cruise on to see whatever I wanted.
Anyways yeah, I think the REAL critique with that character in the BG expansion is not doing more with her, especially given the opportunities that setting creates. But the fact her PRESCENCE is offending people rather than the handling of her is very, very frustrating.
Anyways yeah, I think the REAL critique with that character in the BG expansion is not doing more with her, especially given the opportunities that setting creates. But the fact her PRESCENCE is offending people rather than the handling of her is very, very frustrating.