We had a heated debate about JP3 here at GAF back when it came out in the theaters several years ago.
I'm one of those who think JP3 was utter garbage. They basically brought the series down to Anaconda/Lake Placid/Deep Blue Sea levels. The series was suppose to be a lot better than this. Sorry, I'm not content with the series becoming a mindless popcorn flick after the bar the first film set.
There's usually a lot of disagreement about JP2 around here. While the film does have some glaring plot holes and impossibilities (the gymnastics scene and the entire San Diego segment), it still maintains the basic theme of the first film. The story was decent and somewhat plausible (at least early on). Even though they didn't have an I.Q of 180 yet, the Raptors were still very cool even with limited action. You can't tell me the tall grass scene wasn't the sh*t. Many movies have mimicked it. Also, aside from the annoying little girl (who actually wasn't too bad sans the gym scene), the characters were pretty cool. You can't tell me Roland wasn't a total badass either. JP2 started off very well, it just faltered greatly in the final 20 minutes, so it left a bad test in the mouth.
With JP3, something pisses me off every 5 minutes. Literally. There isn't one stretch of the movie that doesn't jar me because of the total non-sense.
The JP series has become just a merchandising excuse for the studio. The next movie will go something like this...
JP4 Plot
The movie will be 45 minutes long and will feature Ray Arnold (Sam L. Jackson) coming back from the dead. However, he sports a robotic arm since his flesh arm is still missing. All is well except for when his Love Child adam goes to site B in order to find his papi's arm. (Rumor his it that Adam was conceived in the Power Shed with Dr. Ellie Sattler in JP1).
(Production Photo)
Ray Arnold needs help rescuing his son, but Sam Neil said he won't go in a billion years, especially since he was already fooled twice. But Ray suggests flipping a coin and promises Sam a winning Lotto ticket. Within 5 minutes, they're on their way to Site B.
Sam starts giving Ray a tour of the island from the plane, but then Ray reminds Sam that he helped fucking build the park! They land on the island and immediately they see the MegaUberSaraus kill not one, but two Spinosaraus with one swipe. Add 20 minutes of running and screaming.
They find Adam who had been living off his own feces and drinking Dino ball sweat for 10 weeks. Adam tells his dad that he just wanted to get his arm back for him. He thought maybe if he got the arm back, dad and mom would get back together. Unfortunately, Ray bitch-slapped Adam and said, "My arm is on Site A you dumb fuck!". Adam: "There's a Site A?".
The raptors have transcended doing any physical combat themselves and instead have designed and built mecha armor and weaponry for all the other dinosaurs, which they've made slaves of. The raptors control them remotely via telekinesis.
Add another 10 minutes of running and screaming. Right before the end, Sam Neil finds out that little Adam wants to bring back a jar of Dino Ball Sweat (TM) to the mainland so Sam pompously proclaims the boy a "John Hammond wanna-be". Ray Arnold has disappeared from the story for no apparent reason. Then the Swiss and Canadian army come to the rescue and do battle with the mecha dinos, and then save Sam and little Adam.
Heading back on the plane little Adam is frustrated and says, "I guess my dad and mom will never get back together." Sam turns to him and says...
"Adam, I am your father!"
Cue credits at minute 46:36.
