Why are you so boring? (to Tabris)

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Namedropping not only a Japanese restaurant in Vegas (by renowned Japanese Chef Robert DeNiro, no less), but also a French Restaurant in Tokyo :)

uh, tokyo has 110 michelin-starred french restaurants. that's more than paris has for all kinds of cuisine put together.
 
Once again, an example, but Nobu is amazing. I've always had a good time there. But what I've been absolutely impressed by? Places like The French Laundry in Napa, Mentons in Boston, Pierre Gagnaire in Tokyo, or Jean Georges in NY are examples.

These are all places you go to so that you can tell people you went to them. I never go to a place like this unless it is on the company dime. They cater to the vain who wish to tell others where they are going and spend inordinate amounts of money to do so.

I live in NYC where there are a million options and I find going to new random restaurants much more fulfilling (even if I hate what I get) than paying for the privilege of going to those places.

Also, based on your spending habits are you saving any money? And I mean actually saving a significant amount of money. One of the main reasons I don't do any of that other stuff is because I'm more concerned with having enough cash in the bank to treble a downpayment on a house in the CT area then burn it on hangovers.
 
Ugh, I keep trying to avoid getting dragged into giving more examples, but since everyone is focusing on the Vegas trip example. Here are some of my vacations in the last year and a bit with some of the highlights, excluding Vegas example:

Tokyo
- Learned some basic japanese for the trip.
- Got to fly my first international first class which is amazing. My seat was a bed! Drank a lot during the flight.
- We went to a bunch of michelin star restaurants for set menus (Pierre Gagnaire, Sant Pau, Esquisse, Fukudaya, Kikuchi, etc)
- We went for a traditional Kaiseki dinner where ladies dressed in formal kimonos led us to a private dining room where there was a smaller door they came out of to serve us each meal.
- We went to Tokyo Disneyland, went on a bunch of rides, got hats / ribbons to wear.
- We went to sky tree and odaiba ferris wheel to see the view of Tokyo.
- We went to a creepy maid cafe in Akihabara after playing rhythm games at Sega cafe
- We went to a Vampire cafe where the waiter performed rituals for the food we were eating.
- We went shopping around Ginza and Shibuya and went to places like Laduree for afternoon tea.
- Went to see the Hachi statue (the dog) and also got a perfect picture where I waited just a bit too long at Shibuya crossing where I was one of the few, had to quickly run to not get run over.
- Met some people that we went drinking with in Roppongi
- We walked around the national parks to look at the cherry blossom trees in season, as well as went to Meiji shrine to get our fortune and make our wishes. Saw a wedding taking place there at the same time.
- We went to the Lost in Translation bar on top of the Park Hyatt hotel, sat very close to the same spot as Scarlett Johansson and enjoyed some cocktails while listening to the jazz band playing.
- Was filmed for a popular variety tv show for Fuji TV while at a restaurant in which they made me the main focus (as I was the only caucasian there), happened out of the blue. Had to sign a release form.

Puerto Rico
- We walked around San Juan to see the old fortress remains, the interesting architecture, did some shopping, and had some great food.
- We went too close to La Perla and things got sketchy really quick and we were lucky nothing bad happened.
- Stayed at a resort with a private beach so there was a lot of relaxing on the beach, swimming, and windsurfing.
- We went to a couple different dance clubs and finally tried dancing the salsa really poorly, because why not, made a fool of myself but it was funny.
- Tried hard drugs for the first time which was a crazy experience but none I would repeat (E and mushrooms were the only drugs I had tried before)

New York
- Rode the subway to realize how absolutely gross it is, total contrast from Tokyo.
- Saw the Lion King on broadway which was unbelievable. I know that's a super common play / show that you can see anywhere else but it was really fun on Broadway.
- Went to a play starring John Lithgow that we were too drunk at the time to enjoy as much as we should have, but it was really interesting though.
- We went to a Yankees game at the new stadium and while the sport is boring to watch, it was an amazing thing to experience and it was the only MLB game I had seen outside of Fenway Park.
- Went up the Empire State Building, which being a huge fan of architecture was a highlight of my life.
- Walked around basically everywhere on Manhattan, from lower end to upper end just before Harlem at end of Central Park.
- Went to MoMA and The Met which were incredible.
- Went to so many amazing restaurants, some michelin star restaurants like Jean Georges. Also went to a gastromolecular restaurant where the thing I remember most was they would use dry ice in the middle of the table to create a fog over the table as the set menu was a "day in the forest" themed.
- There was a lot of bar hopping on this trip as it was a couple of us, but we didn't leave the main island except when we went to a Yankees game which was just over the bridge. My next trip I'll want to explore the boroughs.

San Francisco
- Went to Pier 39 to shop around and look at the crazy amount of seals.
- We took a boat tour of the bay which happened right before sunset, so as we were coming up to the Golden Gate bridge, the sun was reflecting off the bridge right in the background it was pretty amazing.
- Didn't go to Alcatraz but we went around it on the boat tour so got to see where The Rock, Michael Bay's only good movie (well outside Bad Boys) occurred.
- Walked around Haight & The Castro area. Met with some other tourists and spent the rest of the day with them shopping in the Market area and taking trolleys back towards Pier 39 area.
- Took the Ferry to Sausalito and spent the afternoon there at a quaint restaurant.
- Went up to Napa Valley, and went to The French Laundry which may be one of the best restaurants I've ever been to, and spent the night there.
 
Sounds more like the OP is trying to convince himself how cool he is. OP really, really wants to believe that he leads an exciting life but the truth is that he doesn't and is incredibly lonely. I'm guessing the most meaningful thing to happen to him in a while is a drunk moment he shared with a Vegas escort (who he paid to listen to him).
 
Ugh, I keep trying to avoid getting dragged into giving more examples, but since everyone is focusing on the Vegas trip example. Here are some of my vacations in the last year and a bit with some of the highlights, excluding Vegas example:

Tokyo
- Learned some basic japanese for the trip.
- Got to fly my first international first class which is amazing. My seat was a bed! Drank a lot during the flight.
- We went to a bunch of michelin star restaurants for set menus (Pierre Gagnaire, Sant Pau, Esquisse, Fukudaya, Kikuchi, etc)
- We went for a traditional Kaiseki dinner where ladies dressed in formal kimonos led us to a private dining room where there was a smaller door they came out of to serve us each meal.
- We went to Tokyo Disneyland, went on a bunch of rides, got hats / ribbons to wear.
- We went to sky tree and odaiba ferris wheel to see the view of Tokyo.
- We went to a creepy maid cafe in Akihabara after playing rhythm games at Sega cafe
- We went to a Vampire cafe where the waiter performed rituals for the food we were eating.
- We went shopping around Ginza and Shibuya and went to places like Laduree for afternoon tea.
- Went to see the Hachi statue (the dog) and also got a perfect picture where I waited just a bit too long at Shibuya crossing where I was one of the few, had to quickly run to not get run over.
- Met some people that we went drinking with in Roppongi
- We walked around the national parks to look at the cherry blossom trees in season, as well as went to Meiji shrine to get our fortune and make our wishes. Saw a wedding taking place there at the same time.
- We went to the Lost in Translation bar on top of the Park Hyatt hotel, sat very close to the same spot as Scarlett Johansson and enjoyed some cocktails while listening to the jazz band playing.
- Was filmed for a popular variety tv show for Fuji TV while at a restaurant in which they made me the main focus (as I was the only caucasian there), happened out of the blue. Had to sign a release form.

Puerto Rico
- We walked around San Juan to see the old fortress remains, the interesting architecture, did some shopping, and had some great food.
- We went too close to La Perla and things got sketchy really quick and we were lucky nothing bad happened.
- Stayed at a resort with a private beach so there was a lot of relaxing on the beach, swimming, and windsurfing.
- We went to a couple different dance clubs and finally tried dancing the salsa really poorly, because why not, made a fool of myself but it was funny.
- Tried hard drugs for the first time which was a crazy experience but none I would repeat (E and mushrooms were the only drugs I had tried before)

New York
- Rode the subway to realize how absolutely gross it is, total contrast from Tokyo.
- Saw the Lion King on broadway which was unbelievable. I know that's a super common play / show that you can see anywhere else but it was really fun on Broadway.
- Went to a play starring John Lithgow that we were too drunk at the time to enjoy as much as we should have, but it was really interesting though.
- We went to a Yankees game at the new stadium and while the sport is boring to watch, it was an amazing thing to experience and it was the only MLB game I had seen outside of Fenway Park.
- Went up the Empire State Building, which being a huge fan of architecture was a highlight of my life.
- Walked around basically everywhere on Manhattan, from lower end to upper end just before Harlem at end of Central Park.
- Went to MoMA and The Met which were incredible.
- Went to so many amazing restaurants, some michelin star restaurants like Jean Georges. Also went to a gastromolecular restaurant where the thing I remember most was they would use dry ice in the middle of the table to create a fog over the table as the set menu was a "day in the forest" themed.
- There was a lot of bar hopping on this trip as it was a couple of us, but we didn't leave the main island except when we went to a Yankees game which was just over the bridge. My next trip I'll want to explore the boroughs.

San Francisco
- Went to Pier 39 to shop around and look at the crazy amount of seals.
- We took a boat tour of the bay which happened right before sunset, so as we were coming up to the Golden Gate bridge, the sun was reflecting off the bridge right in the background it was pretty amazing.
- Didn't go to Alcatraz but we went around it on the boat tour so got to see where The Rock, Michael Bay's only good movie (well outside Bad Boys) occurred.
- Walked around Haight & The Castro area. Met with some other tourists and spent the rest of the day with them shopping in the Market area and taking trolleys back towards Pier 39 area.
- Took the Ferry to Sausalito and spent the afternoon there at a quaint restaurant.
- Went up to Napa Valley, and went to The French Laundry which may be one of the best restaurants I've ever been to, and spent the night there.

Oh look. Another tourist story.
 
I love how this thread has gone from Tabris telling us that parents have only got boring stories, to Tabris telling us his boring vacation stories.
 
Oh look. Another tourist story.

It's too bad you are so focused on whether the things you are doing are tourist or not, instead of having fun! You are missing out on the beautiful things in life!

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Life moves pretty fast when you're not a parent. If you don't stop to look around every once in a while, you can miss it.

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I'm confused as to how those lists of things necessarily make one particularly interesting and/or are the purview of only single and/or childless people.
 
Life moves pretty fast when you're not a parent. If you don't stop to look around every once in a while, you can miss it.

You think life slows down when you are a parent? I do not have kids, but even I am laughing at the absurdity of your statement.
 
Eh, it's fun to make fun of OP but he's right. As soon as couples get kids their whole life revolves around their kids, which is totally understandable.

But parents don't seem to realize that nobody gives a flying fuck about someone else's kids (except maybe immediate family). Stop talking about them, they're not interesting.
 
The major pitfall of simple people is conflating being intrinsically interesting with breadth of experience or opportunities borne out of means. David Foster Wallace is one of the most interesting people from the past half century and he spent most of his days wallowing in inebriated loneliness in Bumblefuck, Middle America.
 
I'm confused as to how those lists of things necessarily make one particularly interesting and/or are the purview of only single and/or childless people.

I'll admit we're on a total tangent here. I had just used Vegas as an example of being spontaneous where new parents can't and then everyone went on a tangent how Vegas is boring or nitpicking my specific examples instead of focusing on the main point and here we are.

But the seals man. The seals!

If only we could get along like those seals!

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You sound so interesting Op, wow @all those interesting things you've seen and done. A modern Hemningway - would totally read autobiography
 
I'm confused as to how those lists of things necessarily make one particularly interesting and/or are the purview of only single and/or childless people.

It's like when publishers need include things in their game for bullet point marketing purposes. Biggest open world! Tons of loot!
 
Ugh, I keep trying to avoid getting dragged into giving more examples, but since everyone is focusing on the Vegas trip example. Here are some of my vacations in the last year and a bit with some of the highlights, excluding Vegas example:.

Sorry but this sounds pretty standard, normal tourism. Or in your own words, boring.
 
Sorry but this sounds pretty standard, normal tourism. Or in your own words, boring.

Really?

You think that's boring? What's exciting for you? Let me guess, Sunday morning family breakfast, friends episodes, and brisket BBQ. If so, I have a couple people I know I can introduce to you ;)

You sound so interesting Op, wow @all those interesting things you've seen and done. A modern Hemningway - would totally read autobiography

Thanks!
 
If it's a tangent from saying that one loses spontaneity as a parent, I'm still not sure I get the point. Having commitments isn't something that's exclusive to parents.

The lack of appeal of your laundry list of Vegas actions is more about Vegas catering to a certain type or person than about someone being a parent. I mean I've been to Vegas, it was okay, wasn't amazing to me, I don't think I ever need to go back.

While the list of things in other cities seem like things that a lot of people would do on solo or family vacations, and generally people aren't going to spontaneously fly to Japan regardless of whether they're part of a family unit. I don't think someone referring to these actions as boring is about them not being subjectively fun, it's that they're entirely ordinary, and that seems to be the descriptor you're using for things that are entirely ordinary.
 
OP sounds like the type of guy who can't have fun with his friends if they're hanging out at someone's place watching TV.

Basically, OP, you're the problem and not them.
 
Ugh, I keep trying to avoid getting dragged into giving more examples, but since everyone is focusing on the Vegas trip example. Here are some of my vacations in the last year and a bit with some of the highlights, excluding Vegas example:

Tokyo
- Learned some basic japanese for the trip.
- Got to fly my first international first class which is amazing. My seat was a bed! Drank a lot during the flight.
- We went to a bunch of michelin star restaurants for set menus (Pierre Gagnaire, Sant Pau, Esquisse, Fukudaya, Kikuchi, etc)
- We went for a traditional Kaiseki dinner where ladies dressed in formal kimonos led us to a private dining room where there was a smaller door they came out of to serve us each meal.
- We went to Tokyo Disneyland, went on a bunch of rides, got hats / ribbons to wear.
- We went to sky tree and odaiba ferris wheel to see the view of Tokyo.
- We went to a creepy maid cafe in Akihabara after playing rhythm games at Sega cafe
- We went to a Vampire cafe where the waiter performed rituals for the food we were eating.
- We went shopping around Ginza and Shibuya and went to places like Laduree for afternoon tea.
- Went to see the Hachi statue (the dog) and also got a perfect picture where I waited just a bit too long at Shibuya crossing where I was one of the few, had to quickly run to not get run over.
- Met some people that we went drinking with in Roppongi
- We walked around the national parks to look at the cherry blossom trees in season, as well as went to Meiji shrine to get our fortune and make our wishes. Saw a wedding taking place there at the same time.
- We went to the Lost in Translation bar on top of the Park Hyatt hotel, sat very close to the same spot as Scarlett Johansson and enjoyed some cocktails while listening to the jazz band playing.
- Was filmed for a popular variety tv show for Fuji TV while at a restaurant in which they made me the main focus (as I was the only caucasian there), happened out of the blue. Had to sign a release form.

Puerto Rico
- We walked around San Juan to see the old fortress remains, the interesting architecture, did some shopping, and had some great food.
- We went too close to La Perla and things got sketchy really quick and we were lucky nothing bad happened.
- Stayed at a resort with a private beach so there was a lot of relaxing on the beach, swimming, and windsurfing.
- We went to a couple different dance clubs and finally tried dancing the salsa really poorly, because why not, made a fool of myself but it was funny.
- Tried hard drugs for the first time which was a crazy experience but none I would repeat (E and mushrooms were the only drugs I had tried before)

New York
- Rode the subway to realize how absolutely gross it is, total contrast from Tokyo.
- Saw the Lion King on broadway which was unbelievable. I know that's a super common play / show that you can see anywhere else but it was really fun on Broadway.
- Went to a play starring John Lithgow that we were too drunk at the time to enjoy as much as we should have, but it was really interesting though.
- We went to a Yankees game at the new stadium and while the sport is boring to watch, it was an amazing thing to experience and it was the only MLB game I had seen outside of Fenway Park.
- Went up the Empire State Building, which being a huge fan of architecture was a highlight of my life.
- Walked around basically everywhere on Manhattan, from lower end to upper end just before Harlem at end of Central Park.
- Went to MoMA and The Met which were incredible.
- Went to so many amazing restaurants, some michelin star restaurants like Jean Georges. Also went to a gastromolecular restaurant where the thing I remember most was they would use dry ice in the middle of the table to create a fog over the table as the set menu was a "day in the forest" themed.
- There was a lot of bar hopping on this trip as it was a couple of us, but we didn't leave the main island except when we went to a Yankees game which was just over the bridge. My next trip I'll want to explore the boroughs.

San Francisco
- Went to Pier 39 to shop around and look at the crazy amount of seals.
- We took a boat tour of the bay which happened right before sunset, so as we were coming up to the Golden Gate bridge, the sun was reflecting off the bridge right in the background it was pretty amazing.
- Didn't go to Alcatraz but we went around it on the boat tour so got to see where The Rock, Michael Bay's only good movie (well outside Bad Boys) occurred.
- Walked around Haight & The Castro area. Met with some other tourists and spent the rest of the day with them shopping in the Market area and taking trolleys back towards Pier 39 area.
- Took the Ferry to Sausalito and spent the afternoon there at a quaint restaurant.
- Went up to Napa Valley, and went to The French Laundry which may be one of the best restaurants I've ever been to, and spent the night there.

None of this sounds like anything a parent couldn't do (after the kid turns 3 or so).
 
Right, because they have shit to do. Then they are tired from doing all that shit and want to watch tv.

Basically, as a new parent, you quickly learn that you used to spend a ton of time and energy doing dumb stuff that wasn't that rewarding. (I mean, like, it was probably rewarding at some previous point on Maslow's hierarchy.) All that shit gets cut.

If we had a rep system here, I'd rep this post.

The truth in it is strong. I find doing things with my son 100000x more fulfilling than anything I ever used to do to fill time because I was young and needed something to do.
 
While the list of things in other cities seem like things that a lot of people would do on solo or family vacations, and generally people aren't going to spontaneously fly to Japan regardless of whether they're part of a family unit. I don't think someone referring to these actions as boring is about them not being subjectively fun, it's that they're entirely ordinary, and that seems to be the descriptor you're using for things that are entirely ordinary.

I am saying going to the bar for a couple of beers to talk about their kid or what happened in the latest tv show they're watching because they got nothing else but the kid going on, or having you and your girlfriend invited to dinner parties or game nights where the same type of people are talking about the same things - is boring.

People asked for examples of things that I don't consider boring. I gave them. They focused on the drinking and partying part of it. Led to the tangent of spontaneity and then this tangent. The lists I gave are things I consider fun.

None of this sounds like anything a parent couldn't do (after the kid turns 3 or so).

Except they don't do these things. They do family trips which provide boring stories.
 
I don't know if this is a thing elsewhere, but in the UK it's pretty much a standard joke that boring people will, when talking out their holidays, get out their photos and make you look at them.

Well played, Tabris - I beginning to think this is a masterful trolling exercise.
 
OP sounds like the type of guy who can't have fun with his friends if they're hanging out at someone's place watching TV.

Basically, OP, you're the problem and not them.

Yep. If you actually have friends you don't require significant amounts of money or outside stimuli to enjoy their company. Sounds like you need tons of stuff to do even with friends whom don't have kids. You shouldn't require a bar or tons of alcohol to enjoy the company of your friends. You seem to only think of friends as people who can accompany you places for trips where you meet other people.

Tabis, Do you have any friends that you don't just have accompany you on trips or bar hopping? Like do you guys do anything other than talk about expensive stuff? These people you travel with sound more like acquaintances that can travel with you rather than actual friends.

As has been said previously, you will realize that a lot of the stuff you are so excited by now is really not that important. You are taking longer than most to get there and hopefully you will before it's too late and everyone has moved on and left you behind. The 40 year old bachelor looking to do some blow and grind on impressionable college girls is no longer the cool guy.
 
I am saying going to the bar for a couple of beers to talk about their kid or what happened in the latest tv show they're watching because they got nothing else but the kid going on, or having you and your girlfriend invited to dinner parties or game nights where the same type of people are talking about the same things - is boring.

People asked for examples of things that I don't consider boring. I gave them. Led to the tangent of spontaneity and then this tangent. The lists I gave are things I consider fun.



Except they don't do these things. They do family trips which provide boring stories.

Almost like people have different ideas of what is/isn't boring. How odd...
 
It's sort of creepy how defensive new parents get over how they're a million times happier now and how much more fulfilling their lives are, when most studies show being a parents on average makes people much less happy. One even said it had a worse effect on happiness than the death of a partner IIRC.
 
Almost like people have different ideas of what is/isn't boring. How odd...

Yes, I'm getting that now, there's apparently a lot of people on GAF that rather make a family breakfast, watch Friends episodes, or make a brisket then do the things on my lists.

That blows my mind. And just reinforces my point.
 
It's sort of creepy how defensive new parents get over how they're a million times happier now and how much more fulfilling their lives are, when most studies show being a parents on average makes people much less happy. One even said it had a worse effect on happiness than the death of a partner IIRC.

Yup:

cCgy0SB.png


In reality, it turns out that having a child can have a pretty strong negative impact on a person's happiness, according to a new study published in the journal Demography. In fact, on average, the effect of a new baby on a person's life in the first year is devastatingly bad — worse than divorce, worse than unemployment and worse even than the death of a partner.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news...tatistic-imaginable-about-being-a-new-parent/
 
Yes, I'm getting that now, there's apparently a lot of people on GAF that rather make a family breakfast, watch Friends episodes, or make a brisket then do the things on my lists.

That blows my mind. And just reinforces my point.

Really? That blows my mind, that you can't just accept that people have different interests and there isn't an objective standard of fun/interesting.
 
Being a parent means you're always encountering something new and unexpected. It's anything but uninteresting.

It's sort of creepy how defensive new parents get over how they're a million times happier now and how much more fulfilling their lives are, when most studies show being a parents on average makes people much less happy. One even said it had a worse effect on happiness than the death of a partner IIRC.

What? There are studies that show that they are happier.
 
This thread is great. I love how Tabris thinks that a long list of standard tourist fare is considered the height of a vibrant interesting life. As parents we're all dull as fuck, meanwhile Tabris is doing stuff a billion people have already done, a million people are doing everyday and will continue to do so. I took a boat trip around Alcatraz! I went to a French restaurant! Whoooooa, off the fucking chain! Tell me more, did you go up the empire state building! Perhaps you took a yellow cab or rode the subway!

None of that makes you particularly interesting Tabris, it makes you normal, average. We've all been on holiday, and can continue to do so with kids. Parents can't go on boat trips now? I swear, OP is like one of those gap year kids who goes to Australia or India for the first time and thinks they've had a transcendental experience that no one else has had, and will not shut the fuck up about it when they get home, forgetting that a huge amount of people will have done the exact same thing as you.

Also have to wonder why it's worthy of mention that the restaurant you've eaten at are Michelin starred? Does that make them more interesting or worthy of a story? Doubtful. Just sounds like you're going to these places so you can stealth brag about going to them, without realising that people who pepper their conversations with a subtext of 'look how much money I spent' are the worst kind of bores.

And another thing, you went to see a John Lithgow play, the wonderful, amazing, spectacular John Lithgow; and you got too drunk prior to have a clue what was going on? That's not interesting, that's you being a prick. I'd have been mor interested to hear about the actual play and John Lithgow, not "but I was too drunk to appreciate it, lololol".
 
I am convinced Tabris is channeling Barney Stinson. I'm waiting for him to start talking about some equivalent to the Bro Code.

None of this sounds like anything a parent couldn't do (after the kid turns 3 or so).

His description of his trip to SF is more or less what I did with my 6 year old about 3 months ago, except we actually went to Alcatraz instead of just passing by it. I used to live in NYC and would give out of town friends and family tours and his description is pretty much what I'd do each time, and plenty of time my friends brought their kids with them. Usually because that's the typical list of tourist stuff that they'd want to do, I got pretty sick of going to the top of the Empire State.
 
Really?

You think that's boring? What's exciting for you? Let me guess, Sunday morning family breakfast, friends episodes, and brisket BBQ. If so, I have a couple people I know I can introduce to you ;)



Thanks!

It just sounds like a pretty straightforward and normal vacation, and it sounds quite good, dont get me wrong, but you make it sound like its something extraordinary, what people with kids cant do easily. (I dont have kids btw, and tbh I kinda get what you say partially, with the "kid talk")
 
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