Why I'm Making My Husband Miss The Super Bowl

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Opiate said:
Yes, this is a reasonable synopsis. Obviously sports can have personal meaning to any person; that's different than something having objective, real meaning.

If we use the standard of "personal meaning" in conversations, however, all discussion breaks down. Any person can make anything a hobby of virtually anything and therefore infuse virtually anything with personal meaning. At that point, everything has "meaning," and that makes the word "meaningful" much less meaningful (no pun intended).
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Yet, this is an important game.. the championship game.. and scheduled at a set date and time. You can't just push it out and do it later like most other hobbies. It's right then, or never.

DVR'ing live sporting events sucks.

I tried it last night while at the Blazer game (Batum nailed 9 3's btw) and DVR Chavez Jr v Rubio.. of course on the way home from the game I checked fightnews.com.. and then.. well.. deleted the recording.
 
dream said:
Here's the disconnect: why are symbols (which represent meaningful ideas and values) not valuable? How does one determine the value of somethng so subjective and abstract?
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Objective value is determined by asking this question -- If you stop caring about something, what happens?

If my current girlfriend and I did not celebrate our fifth anniversary last November, would we have stopped loving each other? No. Stopped being faithful to each other? No. This strongly suggests that our love and faithfulness is not caused by celebrating our anniversary.

If I move to Europe, American Rules Football would suddenly become boring to virtually everyone around me. This strongly suggests that American Rules Football is not inherently entertaining, but rather, is entertaining because we have chosen to infuse it with personal value.

However, if I stopped caring about Physics, gravity would still work, time dilation would still be in effect, and light would continue traveling at Plank's constant. These are things which remain true whether you enjoy reading about them or not, researching them or not, understanding them or not. Chemotherapy would still cure many cancers whether you happened to enjoy medical research or not. Computers still work whether you enjoy etching circuit boards or not, and so forth.
 
As to the specifics in the OP, I agree that this is a control thing and is a test she is using against her husband to cover her own insecurities. This will be one of many to come.
 
One of the things I think that should be mentioned is that sports are meant to be watched live. It's not a tv show, or a movie; spoilers come out immediately and are very difficult to avoid, especially in 2012. I still like watching games even if I know the score, but it isn't the same.

It's not that sports are more important than her anniversary, or that they are equally meaningless, it's that the Super Bowl loses a lot of its enjoyment if it's not watched live. Well, if you can remove the commercials and avoid any media it's probably better, but I am almost positive that the dude will see/hear the score before having a chance to watch it in full.

If the woman wanted to really, actually compromise, she would have moved the anniversary dinner.
 
While it's fun to debate the relevancy of a game, this is not the issue at all. We can replace watching the game with "Acivity X", and it still highlights the agenda from the wife.

I know her type, and her looking up to Kim Kardashian says it all. She's insecure and controlling, and don't know why she posted it on the web. Did she want validation? did she want to brag about how she was able to control her husband?

I'm glad most people are calling her out in the blog.
 
brucewaynegretzky said:
The problem is that we're talking about playing sports vs. watching sports and that makes it a little more difficult. Professional sports have "meaning" in the sense that they give us the pinnacle of physical performance. Watching is obviously less meaningful, but I think tangentially there is a connection that has actual value.
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I don't know about you but I always felt like when i was younger watching and playing just sort of went hand and hand. Something to aspire to in terms of physical capabilities. And now it just sort of remains.
 
Cerebral Assassin said:
Sport is the primary form of male bonding around the world, I wouldn't call that meaningless. It also provides a common ground for different social groups & countries to communicate & it could be argued that it also helps/helped with easing racial tensions in certain countries.
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And religions have been popular in almost every society every created; that doesn't make all of them true and valid. Again, argumentum ad populum.

brucewaynegretzky said:
The problem is that we're talking about playing sports vs. watching sports and that makes it a little more difficult. Professional sports have "meaning" in the sense that they give us the pinnacle of physical performance. Watching is obviously less meaningful, but I think tangentially there is a connection that has actual value.
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Yes, absolutely agreed. Including playing instead of watching sports makes the discussion much more complex.
 
The husband should just make a a very nice homemade dinner! Then they can just stay at home and celebrate both their anniversary and the Super Bowl! Win-Win!
 
Yeah any examples citing Kim Kardashian and marriage, and not in a negative tone, sort of damage themselves before leaving the gate.

If she's a fan of watching those Kardashian shows...


protip: most guys don't give a shit about celebrating an annual remembrance of the time you first married. Or your first date. We're just not like that. Women...for some reason are, and we try to cooperate in the spirit of togetherness. But it's really not a big thing, because we're living it, we don't need to memorialize it. The sooner women realize the real difference between us, the happier we'll both be. That's why I get upset when women get SO angry about forgotten anniversaries. It doesn't mean we don't care.
 
The logic behind this premise is flawed. Fire is meaningful in the sense that it gives us warmth, a source of light and a way for us to cook food. This is its intrinsic purpose.

Football or any other hobby is meaningful to a group or individuals because of the significance in terms of invoking emotions.
 
brucewaynegretzky said:
The problem is that we're talking about playing sports vs. watching sports and that makes it a little more difficult. Professional sports have "meaning" in the sense that they give us the pinnacle of physical performance. Watching is obviously less meaningful, but I think tangentially there is a connection that has actual value.
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Sports provide meaning outside of playing or watching. How many foundations are based around players, teams, or leagues? They don't have to set up charitable foundations, and they don't have to give back, but ultimately a lot of them do. Even the viewer plays a part in this as they generate the revenue which works it's way to the player/team/league, and into the foundations.

One could argue that a sport is not meaningful, but reality tells us that it is in many different ways.
 
Opiate said:
Yes, this is a reasonable synopsis. Obviously sports can have personal meaning to any person; that's different than something having objective, real meaning.
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No, it's absolutely not. We're not devoid of emotion, and emotions have real impact on a person's life, no matter if those attachments are beneficial in a clinical, testable way. It's the same across a wide spectrum of human activities, and as you're not unintelligent you realize this.

Opiate said:
If we use the standard of "personal meaning" in conversations, however, all discussion breaks down. Any person can make anything a hobby of virtually anything and therefore infuse virtually anything with personal meaning. At that point, everything has "meaning," and that makes the word "meaningful" much less meaningful (no pun intended).
Click to expand...

All discussion doesn't break down, it just doesn't end with the conclusion that you're seeing. To the individual living their life, whatever they've infused with personal meaning is meaningful to them. It doesn't matter if you see the significance of the importance or not.

It's a culturally important event, whether you choose to accept that or not. If you do, then you have to realize that while you may not understand cultural touchstones differing from your own, they're no different than anything you deem important that others do not. If you don't, then you're simply not willing to accept any cultures different than your own.
 
Her "sacrifices" are LOL worthy. It's just a game and if you miss it you miss it. I see no reason they couldn't just as easily made a reservation in advance for last night instead though. People do this all time for things like Birthdays where they wait till the weekend as it's more convenient.

Not sure why this whole thing is news worthy though.
 
akira28 said:
Yeah any examples citing Kim Kardashian and marriage, and not in a negative tone, sort of damage themselves before leaving the gate.

If she's a fan of watching those Kardashian shows...
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She was making fun of Kardashian for not even reaching her first anniversary.

It sounds like they're kind of compromising, watching the first half of the game in the bar.
 
It's his own damned fault for not stopping to realize that, hey, the Super Bowl is the same time of the year every single year. This isn't a problem for the wedding, it's a problem for life.
 
Being "allowed" to watch 90 minutes at the bar is a slap in the face, not a concession, and will certainly be detrimental to their dinner. It will only get him worked up about the game and thinking about Tom Brady instead of his relationship with his wife, which is bad for both of them. God help him if he says anything about football during that dinner. I think the anniversary should be more important than the game, but the tone of the article makes this seem like she just wants show off how tight a leash she's got her husband on.
 
Opiate said:
Objective value is determined by asking this question -- If you stop caring about something, what happens?

If my current girlfriend and I did not celebrate our fifth anniversary last November, would we have stopped loving each other? No. Stopped being faithful to each other? No. This strongly suggests that our love and faithfulness is not caused by celebrating our anniversary.

If I move to Europe, American Rules Football would suddenly become boring to virtually everyone around me. This strongly suggests that American Rules Football is not inherently entertaining, but rather, is entertaining because we have chosen to infuse it with personal value.

However, if I stopped caring about Physics, gravity would still work, time dilation would still be in effect, and light would continue traveling at Plank's constant. These are things which remain true whether you enjoy reading about them or not, researching them or not, understanding them or not. Chemotherapy would still cure many cancers whether you happened to enjoy medical research or not. Computers still work whether you enjoy etching circuit boards or not, and so forth.
Click to expand...

The Super Bowl, and you're right that this only exists in our American culture, goes beyond just being a 'game' though. It is a once a year event, that has basically become a national holiday, in which you spend time with family and friends, and forge memories that you'll talk about 20 years later.

The game itself might be meaningless, but I think saying the festivities around the event are meaningless is incorrect. If you're saying that, then basically everything about our lives, barring a select few people, is meaningless.
 
Opiate said:
And religions have been popular in almost every society every created; that doesn't make all of them true and valid. Again, argumentum ad populum.
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It doesn't need to be true - it only matters if you are invested in it. Just like your previous examples bringing physics, chemo, and all that other good stuff. You wouldn't feel the loss because you were never involved with it in the first place. However, if someone else was stuck abroad with no place to catch the game at, they'd be feeling shitty.
 
WanderingWind said:
No, it's absolutely not. We're not devoid of emotion, and emotions have real impact on a person's life, no matter if those attachments are beneficial in a clinical, testable way. It's the same across a wide spectrum of human activities, and as you're not unintelligent you realize this.
Click to expand...

Emotions are valuable, yes. That doesn't mean the things which illicit those emotions are. If I derive pleasure from torturing people, does that make torture valuable? Of course not.

Emotions are valuable, and have objective, empirically tested effects on humans. However, those emotions can be caused by virtually anything, including hallucinations we perceive as real. That doesn't make the hallucinations real -- but it does make our emotional responses real.

All discussion doesn't break down, it just doesn't end with the conclusion that you're seeing. To the individual living their life, whatever they've infused with personal meaning is meaningful to them. It doesn't matter if you see the significance of the importance or not.
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It does break down. Concluding that literally everything is important is not a functionally valuable conclusion. If everything is meaningful, than calling something "meaningful" is irrelevant -- obviously it's meaningful if everything has meaning!
 
Opiate said:
If my current girlfriend and I did not celebrate our fifth anniversary last November, would we have stopped loving each other? No. Stopped being faithful to each other? No. This strongly suggests that our love and faithfulness is not caused by celebrating our anniversary.

If I move to Europe, American Rules Football would suddenly become boring to virtually everyone around me. This strongly suggests that American Rules Football is not inherently entertaining, but rather, is entertaining because we have chosen to infuse it with personal value.
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Would society still exist without relationships and entertainment? What form would it take? How would this effect the future of the human species?
 
Stet said:
God damn, it's just a game.
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God damn it's just a day. Im not even a football fan but I'm guessing it's important to him. I think she just wants control and this is her way of satisfying her wants. If I was the guy this would raise a flag in my head that this chick has serious control issues and I would (not joking) bail out. Because today its the Super Bowl tomorrow it's something else. And it's going to be like that with every decision they make. I'm sorry but fuck that.
 
Hero said:
The logic behind this premise is flawed. Fire is meaningful in the sense that it gives us warmth, a source of light and a way for us to cook food. This is its intrinsic purpose.

Football or any other hobby is meaningful to a group or individuals because of the significance in terms of invoking emotions.
Click to expand...

Fire will heat you whether you believe Fire exists or not, whether you enjoy it or not, whether you care about it or not. Fire will kill you if you step in to it, whether you believe in it or not.

Football evokes no emotions whatsoever if you don't care about it. If I lived in Saudi Arabia, stepping in to a fire would still kill me; but American Rules Football would almost certainly become extremely boring to me.

cuevas said:
But were/are they important? Yes.
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Importance and meaning are two different things. I agree, sports are important. I also think shoe shopping is important, by the same measure and by the same definition.
 
Sports aren't that important. In fact, I think they're games that a lot of men live vicariously through. It's fun to root for men that make millions of dollars to throw a ball and fuck super models!
 
This is dumb.

Just celebrate the day before, with something special the morning of the SB.

Saturday is much better anyway for a night out. My wife and I just celebrate on a day that works near the actual anniversary.

SB is a big deal to a lot of people - even when I wasn't as much a football fan, it is a day to have a party and hang with friends. My wife could care less about football - yet this is the first get together we are having in our new house.

This wife sounds annoying to me - it isn't that the SB is more important than her - look at it the other way, the dinner could be just as nice the day before and she could make her husband happy. You can move the dinner no issue - but the SB is one of the few events that you can't just celebrate on another day.
 
Billychu said:
Why do I need to prove my manhood? What value does this add to my life?
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relative to the individual.
and please. the idea that you haven't proven your worth/manhood/alpha male status in any kind of scenario is laughable.


Opiate said:
Importance and meaning are two different things. I agree, sports are important. I also think shoe shopping is important, by the same measure and by the same definition.
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both relative and abstract to the individual.
 
She's just blocking career options for her husband. If he's a professional sports photographer this is the most important event of the year.

You can have a wedding any day of the year if you love eachother. She's just not thinking long term. He can better provide for his family if he gets to work this weekend, she gets a one time event that could be held any day.
 
The fact that she pointed out a bunch of celebrity opinions just makes me realize how lame she is. Honestly, the whole thing reads like her being guilty and trying to make herself feel better for making her husband miss something he wants to see so she can have her anniversary RIGHT away instead of a day earlier or a day later. She better give him some good action for being a good husband and dealing with this bullshit.
 
Opiate said:
It does break down. Concluding that literally everything is important is not a functionally valuable conclusion. If everything is meaningful, than calling something "meaningful" is irrelevant -- obviously it's meaningful if everything has meaning!
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There shouldn't be a labeled, sanctimoniously verified and secure book that establishes the doctrine for all things meaningful.

What is meaningful to me won't be meaningful to you but it may be less meaningful to someone else. There doesn't need to be meaningfulness ranking system. You put shopping on the same level as sports, I damn sure don't. Everyone is different when it comes to that sort of thing.
Basketball Reasons said:
relative to the individual.
and please. the idea that you haven't proven your worth/manhood/alpha male status in any kind of scenario is laughable.
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he's doing it right now too

"i don't have to prove anything!" *puts foot down* "oh wai... :("
 
Opiate said:
Importance and meaning are two different things. I agree, sports are important. I also think shoe shopping is important, by the same measure and by the same definition.
Click to expand...

Again, what do you think would happen to society if entertainment was eliminated? Would it continue on unhindered, like the forgotten fire in your example, or would it change in some significant way?
 
Opiate said:
Emotions are valuable, yes. That doesn't mean the things which illicit those emotions are. If I derive pleasure from torturing people, does that make torture valuable? Of course not.

Emotions are valuable, and have objective, empirically tested effects on humans. However, those emotions can be caused by virtually anything, including hallucinations we perceive as real. That doesn't make the hallucinations real -- but it does make our emotional responses real.

It does break down. Concluding that literally everything is important is not a functionally valuable conclusion. If everything is meaningful, than calling something "meaningful" is irrelevant -- obviously it's meaningful if everything has meaning!
Click to expand...

Odd that you'd cite logical fallacies, then fall back on such an enormous one as a false analogy. Football isn't torture and the fact that you threw that in there makes me rethink the intelligence I ascribed to you earlier. Your nonsense about hallucinations is equally absurd I'm not even going to bother with these further. You ought to know better.

Your last point is the basis for everything you're arguing anyway. It's just such a basic function of human interaction that while something may not be important or meaningful to you, that doesn't make it unimportant. You are not the arbiter of what is, and what isn't, truly important, so flailing about with "Well, then everything is meaningful therefore nothing is" smacks of a severe case of inflated self-importance.
 
Gigglepoo said:
Again, what do you think would happen to society if entertainment was eliminated? Would it continue on unhindered, like the forgotten fire in your example, or would it change in some significant way?
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Sports is the basest form of entertainment available. Football is barely above the WWE in terms of worth and even that's arguable because at least wrestling has writers and actors. Entertainment to me is movies, music, plays, etc. Sports are not some sort of intellectual pursuit and never will be.
 
Opiate said:
Objective value is determined by asking this question -- If you stop caring about something, what happens?

If my current girlfriend and I did not celebrate our fifth anniversary last November, would we have stopped loving each other? No. Stopped being faithful to each other? No. This strongly suggests that our love and faithfulness is not caused by celebrating our anniversary.
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This seems like a very myopic way of looking at it.

If you and your girlfriend had not celebrated your fifth anniversary, the fundamental relationship would not have changed. But celebrating the milestone affords you a designated opportunity to reflect on and appreciate the relationship. That's what gives it meaning -- it evokes emotion.
 
Billychu said:
Give me an example of proving my manhood.
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again. relative to you.
you tell me what those right of passage are in your culture?
is it walking through fire from the breathes of a volcano?
or is it duel to the death with a fellow brother?
or having a stable job where you are independent from your parents?
or being a top tier player in a sport?
 
The fact that she makes comparisons in her marriage to the marriages of Kim Kardashian and Gweneth Paltrow, tells us all we really need to know about the bride.

That said, her husband agreed to it and he married it so good luck to him.

Me personally, I'm against winter weddings because of a higher risk of travel problems if you've got people coming from far away. I guess its not a big deal if you and all your wedding-goers live in a warm climate year round, but I don't. Even if you live in a warm climate and it gets hot in the summer, there's this little thing called air conditioning that became widespread 50 years ago and its wonderful to use in the summer time.
 
I didn't give my full opinion, but here it is.

I don't understand why they have to have an anniversary dinner? Why not spend from morning till the start of the Superbowl together. Maybe have anniversary brunch and lunch. Why dinner? What is so important about eating at exactly the same time as the Superbowl?

If you read the entire thing, it seems as if she planned for this to happen or simply didn't care about him enough to change the wedding date to prevent it from happening. I live in Houston and last year it was not hot in February so her "sweaty in a wedding dress" is bullshit. Then her talking about how she sees the Superbowl as a threat demonstrates how she wouldn't compromise to have the anniversary on another date. She wanted to make sure that the anniversary is more important than the Superbowl for the husband and that meant making sure he wouldn't be able to watch it.

I'm not sure if I should feel sorry for the husband because he allowed this to happen by not putting his foot down and delaying the marriage. I can't say if this marriage will end in divorce because the guy may be a pussy and like being controlled. But if he is anything like most guys this will be the beginning of resentment building up that will ultimately end the marriage. I hope it is soon for that guy's sake because he is with a real cunt.

This woman is one of the reasons why I am scared of being married to the wrong person.
 
The sentimental bullshit obsession with dates that many women like is always intrusive, so it doesn't really matter if it's during a big football game or not. Being the champion team is also sentimental bullshit when you consider how the name of the team is the only thing that doesn't change over the years.
 
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